Bark at the Moon

The night air whips around you as Luna dives through the star-specked sky, her wings outstretched to catch the breeze at just the right time. You hold onto her tightly, clenching your disconnected tin-leg securely in your powerful canine jaws. The many tiny street-lights of Canterlot flicker in the darkness below you both; a surreal sight for a Diamond Dog, but oddly natural for any winged citizen of the city. Perhaps that's why you trust Luna with her flight; she's used to it.

Eventually, Luna's hooves touch down at the cobblestone streets of outer Canterlot, away from the hubbub of the city's main plateau. The relaxed clatter of a tavern-turned-restaurant churns from around the corner, accompanied by the melody of a unicorn magically plucking the strings of an acoustic guitar. You carefully release your grip on Luna, lowering yourself to the ground and snapping on your prosthetic limb. As soon as you're upright, you offer a kind foreleg to the princess. She takes it with such ladylike dignity, that it would be considered a reflex to her.

"A nice place," you muse, walking with her into the nearby establishment. There were plenty of empty tables, but still plenty of patrons to warrant interest. "Not too snooty, but not too shabby either."

"I thought you'd like it," Luna grins, "I've always wanted to come here myself, but I've never had anypony else to go with, and a princess would look so very out-of-place here alone."

"Let's hope it meets your expectations then, your... " (quick, think of a cool word for a night princess!) "...starry-ness."

Hey, she knows you're new to this. You make no attempt to ignore her reaction; a stifled snort that would've easily become a giggle a moment later.

Luna selects a nice outside table for two, under her stars and moonlight. The centre of said table was adorned with a thin, red candle that had only recently been lit. A few ponies from nearby tables had already noticed the two of you, and while there were hushed whispers and the feeling of eyes watching you; as soon as you turned to face them, they would suddenly find their food or their menu a much more interesting thing to look at.

No sooner had your two rumps touched the seats, did a unicorn waiter come over to hoof over two menus.

"Greetings, welcome to the Starglow! Can I offer you anything to drink before we take your orders?"

"Yeah," you reply, "have you got any dark beers?"

"Of course!" he chirps, his nearby levitating pencil scrabbling the sheets of a notepad, "And anything for the lovely lady- AAAH!"

As soon as the waiter's eyes catch the dark horn and wings of the princess of the night, he recoils - much like one would do watching a jumpscare in a horror movie - before swiftly composing himself and picking his pencils and notepad off the floor.

"Did I say 'aaah!'? I meant 'Ah!' Princess Luna, what a lovely surprise to see you in our humble establishment!"

Nice save, idiot.

Luna, without batting an eyelid, pretends the whole thing never happened; "You mentioned drinks, if I'm correct? Do you still make honey wine these days? It's been an age since I've enjoyed some."

The hapless unicorn blinks once, twice, and then; "Oh! Mead! Yes, of course we have that! I'll be right back, feel free to browse the menu in the meantime!"

And away he goes. Fastest nonchalant trot you've ever seen.

Luna half-heartedly flips through the starters section of her menu. "You see what happened just now? That's why I agreed to date you tonight."

You ask her to elaborate in your most prudent fashion; "Huh?"

"Most ponies still see me as Nightmare Moon, even if the darkness within me has long since passed," she leans back in her chair. "But you? You're one of the very few who can see me for who I am. You saw me, spoke to me, even fought me before knowing my past, and thus your interpretation of me remains... untarnished..."

"Hey. Luna."

Her bright, green-blue eyes meet yours. You freeze for a moment, not out of fear, but in appreciation for such beauty. This is it. You have the attention of the single more beautiful goddess that walks this magical land, and she needs your help with this problem. She's been helping you with your nightmare issue for a while, so you'll be damned if you don't give her your help right now. You breathe in, and give her the best advice a Diamond Dog could ever possibly comprehend!

"Screw those jerkbags."

Said bright, green-blue eyes raise an eyebrow.

"If they can't see the stunning mare right in front of their noses because of something their grandparents' grandparents'... grandparents' - eh, you get the point - weren't even alive to witness, then they aren't worth your time. Screw 'em."

Luna lets those words hang in the air for a while as she mulls them over; "You know, my sister would always tell me not too judge the foolish so harshly. No one is born with prejudice, after all."

(Wait, is she calling you foolish?)

"And yet, here I am in a restaurant I was too hesitant to go into. Because I was afraid of having to react to their fears alone, surrounded by a city of the brightest, most educated ponies this side of Equestria. And a Diamond Dog from the caverns is smarter than all of them."

(Oh good, she's calling THEM foolish. That's okay.)

You open your mouth to compliment her, but the unicorn waiter returns with haste, professionally levitating a foaming mug of dark beer, a bottle of mead and an empty glass to the table.

Luna inquisitively opens her bottle as you take a swig of your own dark, hoppy drink. As much as you like your own Diamond Dog beer, Equestrian beer is so much better. Less mud and rocks in it, for starters.

"So, they call it 'mead' these days." Luna hums, "let's see if it's still as delectable as I remember."

And with that, she tips the bottle and pours.

*******

The meals had arrived halfway through Luna's mead bottle, and just as you'd ordered a third pint. Luna chose a fresh, hoof-made hayburger - something that would never be considered in the Royal Palace. You'd ordered the fish - a choice usually reserved for griffons - just to see how Luna would react to you eating meat. She hardly gave it a second thought, chalking it up to you just being a Diamond Dog. An open mind; she's a keeper.

Once the food was out of the way, and yet more mead and beer had been brought in, you and Luna remain at your table and, well, talk. You're reminded of the first time you met Luna - after the initial miscommunication and fight, of course - where you just lay down on the abandoned library floor together, rambling and reminiscing. You hadn't done this with her for a while now; most of your time with her was spend trying to overcome your own nightmares. You miss not having to worry about that.

You're not worrying about that right now, of course. This date, this dinner, this time spent with her... it's far more effective at forgetting your woes more than anything else. It's not Luna's control over dreams that can help you - it's Luna.

Time, and the lit candle, starts to wind down. Luna's beautiful face is illuminated by the candle's whispering flame, as if the goddess herself is glowing like her moon. You could just sit and listen to her firm, yet gentle voice forever. Her smile, her laughter, her half-lidded gaze looking right into your soul. Could this night be any more perfect?

As you're draining another mug, something catches your canine ear. The acoustic guitarist is finishing off his nightly playlist with a passionate flamenco piece. A few ponies start clacking their hooves on the ground to the rhythm, while others are even getting up to dance. A quick glance suggests that the dancers are all romantic couples. This is it. That is what you were waiting for.

You raise a charming eyebrow towards your date; "Do they teach princesses how to dance in Canterlot?"

"No, but We doubt anypony would dare utter a complaint," Luna grins, her face blushing in the candlelight.

"We?"

Luna hesitates, one eye blinking slightly slower than the other. She glances at the third mead bottle she's had so far.

"Honey wine is stronger than We remember," she says, doing surprisingly well to keep herself composed, despite the drink. "But that only makes One more confident in her dancing abilities! Thou care to join Us?"

Luna's already out of her seat when you agree. You eagerly stand yourself up and step towards a clearing away from any obstructive tables- THUD!

You collapse in a heap on the cobblestone floor. Strange; you're not even that drunk. You just feel kinda numb down your left leg.

"My goodness!" Luna gasps, "Art thou injured?"

"Nah, my leg's just asleep."

You look down at the offending limb... to find that it simply isn't. Of course. It's your tin-leg. You were having so much fun with Luna that you'd forgotten entirely about it; she's that perfect. You stubbornly pick yourself up. If any other ponies were watching, you'd insist that it would never have happened, not that there are many who would contest you on it.

"So," you declare, "the dance!"

Luna blissfully places one fore-hoof on your shoulder, letting you hold her by the other. One of your paws gently rest on her opposite shoulder, while the other tenderly wraps around her back, just above her hips. And you dance.

Despite the energetic strumming that flows from the flamenco guitarist, each pace and step of the dance is slow to compensate for your lack of dexterity. Luna doesn't seem to care, and at this point, neither do you. The plucks of the guitar washes over your ears. Luna's beautiful smile, complimented by the calm moonlight. The cool night breeze gently sways her ethereal hair, as if her mane didn't already look stunningly windswept.

Even with your - and Luna's - inebriation, each step of the dance felt regally precise, meaningful and rhythmic. The perfect accompaniment to the rest of the night. Slowly but surely, you find yourself becoming closer to Luna, and not in the figurative sense; every moment that passes by sees Luna's facing inching closer and closer to your own. Eventually, her head rests peacefully on your free shoulder, feeling your heartbeat that races through your veins.

The song ends to cheering and applause from the rest of the dancers, as they return to their respective tables. You and Luna just stand there for a short while longer, letting the rest of the world fade into obscurity.

Finally, her head rises from being nestled in your shoulder. "Thank you for taking me out on this date tonight," she whispers in your ear. "I needed it."

Your canine fingers caress Luna's angelic face, "Thank you for giving me this chance in the first place." It takes a moment to prepare for the next few words: "And for helping me in more ways I could've ever asked for."

Luna's eyes lock onto your own. The whole world seems to fall still, as if there's nothing besides you and Luna there at all. You can feel her cool breath on your face. Her fore-hoof, still holding your shoulder, pulls you just that little bit closer to her. Your free paw gently takes her head, and slowly inches it towards your own. Her eyelids flicker shut. Her lips part.

And in that tense moment, your mouth meets hers. You feel her muscles relax, swooning with the pure joy of your connected lips. Her tongue and yours meet mutually, in a gentle, wet stroke against one another. Her impressive wings unfold out of sheer instinct, before wrapping around you and pulling you ever closer. You wrestle your tongue with hers for just a little longer, playfully stroking one another's in turn. Such a wonderful feeling...

Somewhere in the distance, you hear what seems like thunder. It takes a moment to recognise the sound - hooves upon hooves, all clacking against the solid ground.

Your senses fade back to reality. The heavenly exchange breaks, leaving both you and Luna to your devices, and the uproarious cheer that comes from the whole restaurant applauding the both of you. You scan the whole venue; every pair of hooves were thumping either the ground or their respective tables in congratulations, a few of them even punctuating their point with the occasional wolf-whistle.

Luna exchanges an embarrassed glance with you. "Perhaps we should continue this elsewhere."

"I'll grab the mead."

Snatching the bottle from the table, you take a firm hold of Luna as she prepares to fly away... but not before leaving a satchel of Bits next to your plate (more then enough to pay, plus tips), and flashing a cheeky grin to the applauding audience.

You're an ugly, crippled Diamond Dog, hailing from a forgotten dirty hole in your home caverns, made Canterlot-rich from some random gem you came across. And you just made out with the one and only Princess of the Night, and one half of the Diarchy of all Equestria. You lucky Dog!