HiE: My Little Pyschadelicsnake

Pyschadelicsnake, AKA Lee, had seen better days.

This morning, Lee, or 'Snake' as he preferred to be called, thought that the only thing he had to worry about was a nasty hangover from the previous night's drinking, which he couldn't quite remember fully, but he was sure Janey had put him up to it. He was also fairly sure he didn't want to go drinking, that he wanted to stay in and just carry on playing 'Castlevania: Lords of Shadows', but he couldn't be absolutely certain.

What he could be very certain of, however, was that wherever he had woken up, it definitely was not Janey's house, and it wasn't his house either. He didn't recall his house being made of this much wood, or having this many bookshelves, or having a talking purple pony most of all.

As a veteran of horror video games, Snake had experiences in being in situations like the one he was in now, where he suddenly woke up after blacking out to find himself in a location completely different to the familiar surroundings he knew beforehand. He had experiences in meeting strange characters, however bizarre or odd they were. So, with all this knowledge that he had acquired over the years at his disposal, Snake knew exactly what to do when the alicorn began to talk to him.

He screamed like a little bitch.

That was over an hour ago. He had screamed for a full ten minutes (a new world record for him, actually. He never screamed for as long when he was playing Fatal Frame 2), before Twilight shut his mouth up with her magic and brought out a projector. The past fifty other minutes of that time Snake had spent watching an old-timey film about a magical kingdom named Equestria, and of the ponies who lived in it, along with an insight into its culture and society.

Snake wondered to himself the whole time if Janey had perhaps slipped some sort of hallucinogenic drug into his beer. Considering he was now tied to a wooden chair, made to watch a black-and-white film about some place called 'Equestria' by a talking purple pony, he might as well have been on hallucinogenic drugs or something like it.

As the film reel drew to a conclusion, Twilight flipped the light switch, bringing the lights of the library back on. She removed the magical hold of Snake's mouth, after seeing the new human calm down during the movie. She smiled to herself as she praised herself for coming up with the genius idea to make a documentary about Equestria for new humans to watch whenever they popped up out of nowhere into their world. It made explaining their situations to them a lot less stressful and repetitive for Twilight. Plus oddly humans seemed to pay more attention to a movie screen than to her. Most curious...

"So, basically I'm stuck here in Equestria for seven days for some fucking reason, and I can't go home until after seven days, also for some fucking reason?" Snake asked Twilight as she approached him to undo the ropes that kept him tied to the chair he was in. He stared forward and shook his head in disbelief. "Unbe-fucking-lievable, man."

Lee let out a sigh. "Well, since I'm hanging about here for a while, what do people who wind up here usually do their first day?"

"Well, the occasional human usually thinks they've gone mad and screams for ten hours, and some believe they're dreaming and try to fly off cliffs or fight mantcores," Twilight replied. She shook her head as she said that last part. "Those people tend to a horrible mess the most."

"However, since you've somewhat held your head together this long, I suppose you could start your week in Equestria by heading down to Sugarcube Corner."

Lee cocked an eyebrow. "Sugarcube corner? Really? What, is it some house literally on a street corner that sells sugarcubes?"

Twilight walked over to Lee and placed a hoof on his shoulder as she gave him a sly smile. "Oh, my dear human. You'd be surprised what we ponies have to offer you..."