Searching for Answers

I groggily rose from my position to try and get a sense of where I was now, for some reason I was laying on something fuzzy. From the looks of it I was... Why am I in the middle of the road? Looking around I see that I am in the middle of town, and am surrounded by the ponies.

'Oh shit they plan on sacrificing me to their Sun God in hopes of insuring that the sun will rise tomorrow!'

What? I don't even... Is that thought from personal experience?

'Oh, Nightmare, so that was a thing that happened.'

"You're awake!"

I look in the direction of the voice. Turns out, the fuzzy object I was laying on was the same pink terror that gave me a heart attack in the first place. Recognizing her was all I needed to fully wake, now I need to get out of here before these ponies prove to be the death of me. Luckily, I have my secret weapon hidden in my pockets.

The Pink One, as I shall now call her, was unaware of my devious plotting and continued with what she was saying, only much slower than when we first met and she seemed to lack that air of boundless energy.

"We were so worried! I was carrying you to the hospital! Are you alright? Do you still need to go?"

'Nightmare, how long was I out?'

Not as long as you would think. In dreams, time has a tendency of getting distorted. So what was that about a secret weapon?

'Later, and don't read my mind'

Oh, I'm only reading surface thoughts. How else would we communicate without the ponies finding out about me?

I will have to give her that for now. I can't just stand here doing nothing, so this conversation will have to wait for another time. As I was conversing with my new resident, The Pink One had some how managed to procure a cupcake. When did she get that? It doesn't look like she has pockets. She hands (hoofs?) it to me with a sad smile.

"H-Here. I just wanted to say that I am sorry for what I did. I didn't mean to cause you so much trouble."

That is actually kind of adorable, shame I hate the color pink, but lets give this a try. I take the offered cupcake, and of course I eat it. As I go to take the first bite, my taste buds were assaulted by the unique sensation.

"This cupcake is..."

Pinkie looked up happily, wanting to hear approval and forgiveness.

"Hrrk!" I almost feel sorry for her, almost. I quickly run as fast as I can, ignoring the shouts of the ponies that got in my way. I proceed to find the nearest bush, and vomit.

"GLARBLEBLARG!"

The Pink One started scolding herself upon seeing me emptying my guts, "What was I thinking!? He is likely still sick! He can't eat sweets in his condition!"

The Purple poofter with a horn and Fluttershy must have been in the crowd, because I did not notice them until they spoke up. I must not have been out for very long. I can see the damn hospital, AND the weird gingerbread house we came from, now that I am not so focused on being surrounded by painfully-brightly-colored giant-eyed freaks.

"I'm sure it will be alright Pinkie. You were just trying to be nice."

"Yeah, and I am sure he appreciates the gesture."

Meanwhile, I had finished removing all trace of what simply must have been a poisoned confection from my system. There is no other reason it could ever taste so vile. I'm serious, that was nasty beyond all reason. The thing had so much sugar in it, as well as an unidentifiable mix of flavors, it tasted like a Leprechaun kicked my teeth in, while he had rainbow colored unicorn shit stuck to his favorite dancing shoes! But for simplicity's sake, and so I can start scrubbing my tongue sooner, I just said;

"That was the single most disgusting thing I have ever put in my mouth."

The moment 'Pinkie' heard me say that, she actually fell on her rump and started crying. Twilight seemed rather miffed about that.

"I know you are having a rough time, but that kind of rude behavior is completely uncalled for! Apologize right now!"

Everyone's eyes are focused on me, so now is the perfect time for my escape!

"LOOK, A DISTRACTION!" I yell at the top of my lungs pointing into the distance before running away. To my infinite glee, they actually looked! Every last one of them! I had already jumped though an open window in one of the nearest houses (Which was weirdly designed. Why would anyone want a house to look like a tree? Kinda strange) before they figured out what I did, and let the self loathing begin! Peeking out as much as I dared, I got a front row seat to an amazing show!

"AUGH! I can't believe I fell for that! How could I possibly be that stupid!" Ooh, Twilight seemed to be taking it the worst. Fluttershy on the other hand...

"I still don't see it. Where is the distraction?"

I wonder how long it will take her to realize that she was tricked. Now... I have no idea where I am, and no clue where their library is. This is going to be fun!

Twilight Pov

Alright, I need to calm down. I need to find him before he gets hurt.

"Okay everypony! spread out and search for him! You all saw what kind of condition he is in, we can't let him run around without getting some proper medical attention first!"

I helped Pinkie get up and said, "Come on Pinkie, he is likely just having a really hard time. I'm sure he didn't mean it."

*Sniff* "You think so?"

"Yeah, now we need to find him. He may already need our help if his heart is really that fragile."

"You're right! Lets go!" It is nice that Pinkie always bounces back so quickly.

As all gathered started to search through any possible hiding places, I noticed Fluttershy hadn't joined the search.

"Where is it? A distraction should be easy to spot!"

This is going to be a long day.

Back to our favorite sociopath

Pfft Ahahahaha-I can't-I can't breath-Hahahaha!

'You seem to be having a good time.'

Some of my most hated enemies just fell for the simplest and dumbest trick ever conceived. Yeah, I am really enjoying this!

'So you have had run-ins with these creatures before?'

Yes I have, and I particularly enjoy the insults you come up with for Twilight, but I have to ask; What *is** a "poofter"?*

'Later. First, do you have any idea where their Library is?'

Yes actually, you're in it.

I stop to look around. This is a kitchen. Why would there be a kitchen in the Library? I move on to the next room and sure enough, books everywhere. I'm confused. Whatever, time to steal... How am I going to take these with me? I start rummaging through the house, looking for any sort of container I can easily carry with me. Oddly enough, I come across a large sack. I find myself questioning why the librarian has a sack that could easily fit another resident of the town, but that could quickly go to dark places. While fun, that is not why I am here, and I need to hurry before anyone finds me. Due to my haste, I don't really pay any attention to what books I put in the sack, and just place random books (yes place, not stuff. I happen to take good care of literature) in the bag.

"What do you think you're doing!"

Oh shit, I was found out by... The three least intimidating ponies that could have chosen to block my path. Fluttershy, Pinkie, and Twilight.

Um, what's the bag for?

"He is stealing my books!"

"That is not very nice. Come on, just put the books back so I can throw you an apology party!"

You know, I am an ancient demon. I could have just taught you instead of you going through all of this effort.

'Why didn't you say so sooner!'

You never asked.

Well, I have them now, and I am not letting this team of techno-colored pansies get in my way!

"Get out of the way."

"Not until you return every last one of my books, and you are going to reorganize them!"

"And just how do you plan on making me?"

You know, I thought this would be easier. That thought was crushed by her smug smile, and the fact that her horn started glowing, and said glow spread over me and lifted me into the air.

"That is how. Now agree to put them back, and I will let you down."

Alright, this was unexpected. Time to break out my secret weapon.

"You want your books back?" I reach into the bag and grab one at random. "Fine! Take it!" And I throw it, out the door they came in!

You may be questioning my logic, but have you ever thrown something past someone? It breaks their concentration, and they always look. Twilight dropped me in her hurry to catch her book, and that gave me all the time I needed.

"Alright wise-guy, I'm going to-"

"EGG!" *Splat*

As she was turning back to me, I pulled the eggs out of my pocket (my pajama pants have nice and spacious pockets. some of the eggs were crushed, likely when I fell, but I still had enough for what I needed to do) and started throwing them at her. While she was too confused to stop me, and Pinkie was too busy laughing, I ran back to the kitchen, and opened the door to her refrigerator.

Twi's POV

"WHY!? Where did he even get these!?"

"So that is what he wanted the eggs for."

"AAH!" I chase after him. Pinkie is too far gone to be of any help right now (the sudden shift to and from depressed must have had more of an effect on her than she is willing to admit. She really needs that laugh), and Fluttershy is, well, Fluttershy. But as I enter the kitchen, I see something small and white fly past me, and on instinct my eyes follow it. Only to widen at my realization.

"No."

Turning as fast as I can, I try to prepare a spell in time, but it was too late.

"EGG!" *Splat*

"I FELL FOR IT AGAIN!" after I cleaned enough of the egg off of my face to see, he was already gone.

I think all of Ponyville could hear my screams of frustration.