Starting Up

Purple. This mare was not lavender, she was purple, pure and simple. Staring up at me with the cutest little horn peeking out of her mane, having just opened the door for me. Clearing my throat, I began to introduce myself, “Good afternoon, my name is Matthew and, if you are indeed Twilight Sparkle, then I have been sent here by Celestia to live with you,” although it was increasingly apparent that this guide of mine was not listening. What she did appear to be doing was examining me with such an intensity that I began to fear for my life. This fear turned to anger when she, rather rudely, began blabbering on, “What species are you? Do you have magic? Can I experiment on you?” and so on so forth. To be quite honest, I was tempted to see just how long she could keep going without any appropriate breathing apparatus. However, I had to halt her, jamming my hand over her muzzle, harder than it looks, did the trick, “I am a human and that is all you need to know, now, as I said I have been sent by Princess Celestia and I think she might be rather angry with me if I have to go back to Canterlot because I can’t live with the mare she stuck me with.”

Needless to say, Twilight Sparkle looked miffed. Ignoring that, I continued on, “I have to say although I might be able to live with you, I could certainly live with this village, the rustic charm and calmness has a very appealing quality to it, except for that garish Carousel Boutique in the middle of town,” if I had thought that Twilight was miffed then, it appears that she has some kind of link to this Carousel Boutique as she instantly started demanding that I take it back. This might have included me being picked up and shook by her telekinesis while she demanded that I take back my insult against her friend. After a while of this, I was eventually put down, falling flat on my face a moment later.

When I could get back up, I stared down that magic abusing, purple, slightly crazy looking horse, sorry, pony and let loose “That building was the single most imbecilic buildings I have ever seen, as a building in it’s own right it is a horrible mess of pomp and ego that provides the beholder with the instant impression that the owner of said building has an ego so large that it encompasses all of time. I won’t even begin to speak of what it does to the entire feel of Ponyville itself, despite that it completely ruins what rustic charm there is,” breathing heavily, I noted the ridiculousness of this entire conversation, an argument based off a single building that one of her friends own. I only went into it because the pissed purple pony felt the need to shake me because of something so inconsequential. Does that mean it’s a big issue in this village, or in this world of magic and ponies, was that building sentient and so somehow her friend?

I didn’t get an answer to these questions, or indeed any answer at all, Twilight had fallen silent. Leaving me to assume I’d won that round, moving on, I had to ask, “Who was the friend I insulted? This Rarity I’ve heard about seems to be a dressmaker, not an architect so why should she be offended if I question the design of her building?” Purple was about to answer this question, when a cat-sized dragon walked in. I might be a stranger to this world, but I was still worried about a dragon with possible fire and a library made out of wood and filled with paper. Twilight however was unaffected and did answer my question “Rarity happens to be one of the best dressmakers out there, but she also has an eye for design and helped to design the building. And no, the building is not my friend, buildings can’t talk. As for you’re staying, since that’s what the Princess asked, you can sleep on the couch,” from the looks of it a hard, stiff couch placed along the wall and under a set of stairs that led up to the upper levels.

I saw the instant need to get my own house, tomorrow I think I’ll take a look around and see if there’s not a job for a human like me. I would say something fiddly that they can’t do with their hooves, but they're more likely to give the job to a unicorn with telekinesis. Maybe something more versatile, with this whole cutie mark business they must be a very specialised race and something that requires a lot of skill and many different activities might be a good thing to aim for. Writings off the list since it’s gonna take a while to write something and then find a publisher. While I’m at it, I might as well look into house prices, see if I can’t find somewhere cheap, although from my first glimpse around the village, while I was walking, there didn’t appear to be anything other than fully detached houses and certainly no large shared accommodation.

That was for tomorrow however, and as it happens I appear to have neglected to say the general time as the sky was now dark and filled with bright stars, as I prepared to go to sleep. the only other problems I can think of that would need to be solved tomorrow would be clothes, didn’t want to walk around in the same clothes for several days, and food, as an omnivore living in what appeared to be a vegetarian's paradise, worse case scenario I scare them all and they run me out of town, best case they’re omnivores to.For now, I lay on this hard, stiff couch and let all of these problems drift off into the darkness of uncomfortable sleep.