Drive You Insane

I had my back and my head firmly resting against the door, trying to ignore the clingy, sticky feeling of my tears on my foreleg’s coat. Breathing rough, wings twitching and heart pounding, I counted each second as they went by, hoping for an answer from inside the building.

Nothing.

Only a minute remained.

One, two, three, four…

Time was my greatest enemy for that moment, but it flew by so fast.

Fifty-nine, sixty.

Time was up.

I forced my rigid body to lift itself off the rough wood, and I placed my forehooves down before myself, using my back legs to thrust up into a standing position. Grueling, I then turned around to the face the door, straightening my posture and puffing my chest in an attempt to boost my own dwindling confidence.

“I’m coming in, Rarity!”

“Wait!”

I paused, realizing my horn had flared up and I was about to burst the door down. Ears perked to listen for a reply, I heard muffled sounds of something moving before there was a sharp click.

“C-Come in.”

I looked to the lavender doorknob before me, begging to be pushed open. To show me if all the nasty things I’d thought, done and said were to take their tolls.

How ironic, I thought, the same color as me…

It almost taunted me with the way it sat there patiently. I could even see a familiar grey face looking back at me in it.Taking a deep breath, my magenta aura wrapped around it slowly. I savored each moment, for it was familiar. The inside of the boutique, however, was unknown territory now. Eventually, I found myself nearly levitating the door and had to stop. No more procrastination.

Jostling around with the handle for a few seconds to make sure it was unlocked, my muscles tensed as I shoved the door open with all my might. It sideswiped into the wall, and there was the sound of something striking the ground.

My eyes were closed. I wasn’t prepared for what I was going to see. But with the sheer force of my will, they opened.

Creaking. The slow creak of something hanging gently swaying from side to side in the air. Creak. Creak. Creak.

Rope.

White.

Purple.

Death.

My pupils were diminutive. The tears built in the corners of my eyes and cascaded down to the floor.

Drop, drop, drop.

Creak, creak, creak.

My legs turned to nothing, and I was practically razed to the floor. The world around me became a blur of color.

Dead, dead, dead.

Rarity was dead.

I closed my eyes to try to stop the onslaught of salty bitterness, but it was to no avail. Out the tears came like a sea of regrets, never ending and more painful by the second.

Seconds.

Why did I waste them? Why didn’t I barge in to stop her before it escalated too far?

I didn’t know.

I forced my eyes open again, only to cover them with my hooves. I let my wings droop off from my sides and I kicked out my hind-legs. I don’t know why I did those things, but I did. Then it kept on going. My tail swished from side to side, I bit my lip as I continued to bawl, I kept on blinking in the blackness that my hooves provided.

Denial. Was this it? Or was I simply going mad?

A sob escaped my lips and my forelegs moved away. I opened my eyes.

A letter. A small piece of paper with a large signature on it that could only be hers. Rarity’s.

Impulsively I snatched it with my magic and levitated to my eyes, barely able to make out one paragraph as my tears continued to make their way out.

You did this. If not for you, Discord and I would no doubt be happily content with each other's embrace. But you had to drive a wedge between the locks of our arms and the touch of our lips. You, for all your intelligence, who could not have been ignorant of my feelings for him, pushed me away. Now I shall I act, in turn, of what you have done to me. As I have tied your hoof to death from which I am now suspended, so I will tie your happiness to guilt. You will no longer love Discord knowing that my life was the price.

---

There is nothing better than getting a massage in the morning. I would not have survived to this day if Aloe Vera and Lotus had not started their establishment. It was always the perfect ideal place to calm my troubles away; to throw away my thoughts about Sweetie Belle being a nuisance as I had a mud bath, to relieve myself of the stress I possessed from pulling an all-nighter designing the next best thing, and more recently, to empty my frustration from Discord addressing me by ‘the name that shall never be spoken’ as I had a gentle massage. A massage that was undertaken by the twins.

“You seem to be taking more massages recently,” Lotus was in the process of applying a handful of hot oil on my back while Aloe loosened my shoulders. “Discord’s still messing with you?”

“You have no idea,” I spilled a scoff.

“I still don’t think it’s that bad,” Aloe Vera voiced as she moved to lightly combing my ears with a brush, “he’s just having fun with you.”

“I don’t want him to have fun with me by calling me that!”

“If you don’t mind me asking, why do you hate that name?”

The name ‘Rares’ has been common with me since my school days. Back then I was not really popular. While everypony went off to have fun during recess I would always retire to a table and draw on a notebook paper.

 I would draw a variety of ideas from clothing articles to aristocratic interior designs. At field trips, when others wore either a tie or a scarf or a hat, instead I would prefer to wear a cotton frock. And I did. Sadly my use of extravagant garments were not that all able to capture the awed eyes of my classmates. There were always the pointed hooves and the tones of laughter. But that was just the beginning. . .

 It was Hearts and Hooves day. Everyone was busy scribbling notes into cards and giving them to others who they would dream to be their special someponies. That afternoon after recess I discovered a card. A card that laid on my desk. It was different from the other cards that my classmates made. Others presented their cards exposed. This one was enveloped in what looked to be cotton paper. And the differences did not stop there.

The conventional cards had either funny doodles or glitter, which in my opinion ruins the elegance and simplicity, that were drawn with at most half effort. On my card, however, there lay a heart with the name Rares, written and drawn. I know that this design is used a lot, but, by the markings, the design was made using a quill and ink. The heart was symmetrical in each angle and proportion of view. The name ‘Rares’ was written in a penmanship that I could only judge as ‘true effort, skill, and desire.

Upon flipping the cover I could only do all but let out a small gasp. The average card done by my fellow classmates either held the text ‘Will you be my special somepony’ or simple remarks like ‘I really like you a lot’ or even uncouth remarks such as ‘You look smokin’ hot.’ This was what I expected as I opened my card but I was truly mistaken. My card did not hold any of those simple messages, but a short poem. I still recall it as clear as day:

A little walk in the park and ICan not help butImagine you walkingTalkingLaughingby my sideI yearned to request a day ‘Just a day’ I would sayWith youBut I would fail before the onsetThe words playing in my headSeemingly authenticTaunting me‘With you? Of all people? My my’You would presumably regard me as panickyA worthless bundle of unnatural nervesAnd. . . I would not attributeAs you would be nothing short of The nail set with one strike of…A malletBut I could not put off this eventEven when it is my knowledge that you accepting meMay only be my dreamA surreal pipe dreamBut I desire to grasp at that dreamThat minute fraction of determinationAs I sit on the old stone park bench While the vision of your faceYour smileYour eyesAnd the sound of your beating heartWhile that vision sticks likeA broken recordBut stuck on the piece of the record that I consider DivineI can not hide inside the dark closet while you, you, shine brightly outside in a radiant lightthat overpowers even the SunAnymore. . .Therefore I humbly beseech,May I have the privilegeOf your presence with me For one day In the park as a start?Rares?

Your Admirer

Novella

His real name was Novella, but he was nicknamed by everyone else as ‘Sandpaper’ since his early days in his childhood. Only a few knew of his genuine name; those few being his small family and me. No one else knew, such is the reason, thankfully, he was not ridiculed when it was snatched from my aura grasp and read, aloud may I add, by a group of foals.

As they read the pointing hooves and the tones of laughter increased tenfold. All except one colt. He was pale with yellow irises and shaking hooves as he viewed the mocking spectacle. As stinging tears poured I pushed two of the foals as I ran. I was not aiming for a particular destination, the foals I shoved were the last people, no creatures, on my mind. I just ran while the card was left behind in the hands of those. . . barbarians. I did catch a tiny glimpse of the pale colt, Novella, rising to chase after me as he called my name, but he was blocked, albit unintentionally, by the laughing classroom. I never saw Novella again; he and his family seemed to have disappeared from the face of Equestria. The taunting did cease eventually but that particular day was one I would always remember.

“I don’t want to talk about it,” was all I could say to Aloe Vera. She shrugged.

“Alright. I don’t want to reopen old wounds, since it seems you weren’t exactly happy during that flashback.”

I blushed.

“Was it really that noticeable?”

“Very.”

I sighed. I really do need to control my emotions. But my mind was soon taken off the subject when I felt Aloe and Lotus work wonders on my back, their hooves brilliantly working together in harmony to relieve all tension I had. Breathing in with a smile, I allowed myself to close my eyes and hum a random tune as a sense of peace overcame me.

Discord, hmm… I hope he behaves at the picnic

But I let the thought disintegrate. Why was I at the spa if I was going to worry about things out of my control?

Crack.

“Oooooooooohhhhh yea-a-a-a-h-h-h-h....” My voice buffered with each hit that the twin’s did on me, as they hit a certain area by my tailpiece full of tension. And as one of the sistesr rubbed away the pain I felt myself melt into the seat I was on.

“My, my, Miss. Rarity, you’ve been really stressed out these past few weeks, haven’t you?” Lotus asked, never halting with her massaging.

“Y-You have n-n-no idea…” I murmured back, blissfully unaware of what was going on around me. Their hooves worked in a perfect rhythm as they circled around my postern in a magical sort of way. But as I rested under the touch of the two spa ponies, my mind was prone to drift off to the deepest, darkest corners of my moonstruck mind…

Why had I asked Discord to accompany me to a picnic?

Sure, Applejack had knocked some common sense into my head, but she couldn’t have derailed me like that too… I mean, to spend time with him was one thing, but to do it alone?                 Without Fluttershy there to reel me in back to sanity, what was I to do? Was I losing the years worth of sagacity I had struggled to gather?

By the look of it Aloe could tell I was edged about something but she left it aside as she resumed her job.

I must now be the most relaxed mare in Ponyville. I wonder if the others are  as content as me? What could they be doing now? I know Applejack is at the farm, Rainbow is reading that book of hers, yet Fluttershy and Twilight. . . I don’t know what they’re doing.

Discord. I wonder what he is doing? Probably being his usual self. I must admit though, his antics are rather entertaining to watch.

 Especially when he does that cute pouty face of his.

I opened my eyes for a brief moment to see the sisters share a quick look.

“Oh, so you like Discord’s ‘cute pouty face’~” Aloe and Lotus sing-songed.

“What?!” I sprang up, my face most likely flustered.

I said that out loud.

 “Nonnononoono. No!”

“Sure you do,” Lotus teased.

“Nothing’s wrong if you like him,” Aloe voiced, “there’s no shame in admitting that.”

“Ooh, and just think about how your children will look!” Lotus then piped in.

“Yes, with their mismatched wings and freaky, oversized heads!”

My face turned a deeper red at the mention of ‘children’

“That’s completely absurd,” I argued. “I don’t like him like that!”

“Keywords ‘like that,’ which means you still like him.”

I did not bother replying, opting to lay my head back down while I tried to drown their laughter.

“Just . . .  finish the massage please. I’m not paying you for nothing.”

“So you feel ready to take it a step further with Dissy?”

French ponies these days, I thought.

I rolled my eyes though, and decided to brush their remarks off. They always loved a good tease. But as I awaited my massage to resume, I found myself sitting face down without anything to relax myself. I sat up, removing my head from the face cradle with a confused glance to the twins. They now stood in the corner of the small room, whispering and giggling with one another.

“Oh come on, girls!” I begged, “Stop fooling around and just hurry up with the massage.”

The shared another look with each other before sighing.

“Alright, Rarity. But only because we don’t want you putting in a bad review on the newspaper…”

I cocked an eyebrow.

“Whatever do you mean?”

Aloe grinned.

“Well… we were going to ask if you’d do a column reviewing our spa in the Ponyville Express.”

“And for you to tell them about how great our spa is too,” Lotus added.

I let out a groan.

“You girls just always expect me to do favors for you, don’t you?”

They both nodded.

“Very well. But I want a free mudbath with Fluttershy tomorrow if that’s the case.”

“Alright!”

I let out a yawn as I opened the door to my boutique, calling out, “Sweetie Belle!”

I heard a voice from upstairs reply, “Yeah, Rarity?”

“Just making sure you came home today.”

I heard a groan.

“I only ran away once! When I was seven!”

“Well excuse me for being a concerned, loving sister.”

“BLEGH! Rarity, stoppit!”

Rubbing a temple with a forehoof, I simply decided to ignore my sister’s antics as I made my way to the kitchen. Opening up the fridge with a spell, I looked around for things to put into the picnic basket, which lay somewhere in the mess of clothes I’d left on the floor.

“Champagne, cheese and crackers, hummus, bread, daisy sandwiches- oooh, I have those imported grapes too! Perfect…”

Gathering everything up with small incantations, they soon all hovered around as I shut the stainless-steel door with a brisk flick of my wrist, turning around to sort it all out on the table.

I wonder if Discord will even like any of this... Oh, I knowthis isn’t very lady-like, but…

Levitating a lemon over, I then retrieved a knife from the sink and sliced it in half, dripping it all over one of the sandwitches. Whilst doing this, I imagined all the faces he would make, and how he would lean over and pucker up…

“Ahh!”

My hoof was caught on one of the leftover paint cans from Sweetie Belle’s endeavors, and I found myself flat on my back on the floor. Pain shot up my shoulder.

“Celestia-dam-”

“Rarity, Mommy doesn’t like you swearing!”

Muttering the curse under my breath, I let out a groan of repine and flopped over to my stomach, pondering just why my thoughts turned to rather… irregular thoughts.

“Pucked lips? Leaning over? Hot, sweaty, bulging muscles on a french ponie as he whispers,’Come fly with me’, only it’s Discord?”

Aloe and Lotus’ teasing came up.

“You liiiiiiiike him~”

I let out a scream at the thought.

“Geez Rarity, you’re screaming as if you figured out you like Discord!”

I screamed some more.

“Yeah, that is kind of bad.”

“NOT. HELPING.”

My breathing quick and panicked, I jockeyed for a sitting position, placing a hoof over my chest. My heart was pounding like a caged animal, and I once more asked a one-worded question: Why?

Why would I possibly hold affections for Discord? Why was the thought of it enough to make me scream? Surely Fluttershy had something going on with him, and it had never bothered me to think it before. Shaking my head, I looked back over to the mess I’d made on the kitchen floor, deciding to simply clean it up and continue my packing, pushing the thought out.

The ponyville bridge, from where I stood, looked like a scene from a rococo painting as it lay there, the stream flowing underneath, the tiny numbers of ponies either crossing or just standing on the bridge, leaning on the rails whilst they enjoyed the lowering sun. Discord stood on the upper arch of the bridge looking at the water below as his tail gently swished back and forth.

Okay Rarity, breath in, breathe out. There’s nothing crazy about this, just an evening with Discord. What could go wrong? Heh heh, knock on wood!

I could feel all but goosebumps as I went to him, levitating my basket to the side. Please, for the love of Celestia, don’t let him call me Rares, I thought as I gently patted his shoulder, his head turning towards me.

“You seem really eager,” I playfully teased while bearing a smile.

“Well, It seems so,” Discord rubbed his head while a sheepish smile was plastered on his face, “I was simply so ecstatic to hear your nagging, so I came forty-five minutes early!.”

Forty-five minutes early? If it was ten minutes early I would understand, disregarding the insult… But forty-five minutes?

“That’s not a real answer, Discord. I can see you’re lying.”

His nose returned to its normal length.

“Well, maybe I was happy to hang out with you for once! Jeez, you never bothered to even send a letter once since our friendship started...”

I grumbled. Here was the Discord I knew.

“And since you made the effort to take me out with you I took the liberty to wear my best suit,” With a snap of a claw a black suit appeared around. I rolled my eyes and shook my head but I could not help but laugh on the inside. Why was I laughing on the inside? Am I supposed to be annoyed? Irritated at least or most? He then looked at me up and down.

Is he… no, Rarity, shush!

 “And for once you haven’t worn a giant hat! Anyways, I thought that we could have an evening picnic for a start so I brought a blanket.” With another snap we both appeared on an empty grassy hill underneath a tree and a red plaid cotton blanket appeared. Right over my head.

Why me? I thought as I struggled with fighting to get untangled from the blanket. Discord covered his mouth with his paw as he tried to stiffen a giggle. Why couldn’t looks put people in the Emergency Room? “Get this wretched thing off of me now!”

“Oh dear, I’m terribly sorry. Allow me.” Another snap and the blanket was laid neatly on the grass.

“Where are we even?” I looked around. All that was in view was grass and wheat that stretched to the horizon. Possibly a small red barn in the distance too.

“Just a hill where I like to relax at times.”

“You? Relaxing?” I scoffed, “Knowing you, this place should be raining chocolate or dogs.”

“Hey, just because I am the master of chaos doesn’t mean that I am not an admirer of beautiful sights!” A single eyeglass poofed into existence on his left eye and a moustache poofed under his nose. I then heard him mumble something.

“What was that?”

“N-nothing, nothing! Just think about how, er, dog rain would look! Yes!” He placed his hands in view and shook his head. I could have sworn hearing the words and now I have two beautiful sights to admire. Maybe that was all in my head, though. What could he mean by that…

Shaking my own head, I decided to switch the subject to something else.

“I bought some things we could eat, anyways.” I unpacked the items from the picnic basket, laying them out neatly. I would admit that the dishes I had retrieved, even though they were packed in a mere basket, took form over function just a little.

“Wow Rarity, even your dishes has the pazzzaaazzzzzz look in them!” Discord waved his hands in an arch path. I chuckled. “Aha. A laugh. That was a laugh. Fillies and gentlecolts we have a laugh!” He spread his arms out and sang. The ravens flew from the wheat towards the horizon.

The horizon that was painted orange and red from the setting of Princess Celestia’s sun. Feeling myself begin doze off,  I rolled my eyes as I lay back on the blanket. But they opened back up when I felt something hot and sticky on my shoulder, looking up to see Discord hovering over me with a malicious grin.

My whole body went tense as I tried to figure out what to do, mind going blank. Why was he above me? Why was he smiling like that? And why was he…

His lion paw tapped my forehead, and I blinked.

“Tag. You’re it.”

“...tag?”

Jumping off of me, he bounded off into the field, yelling,”Glorious, fun tag!”

Sighing, I leaned up, drowsily mumbling,”But I’m tired. Can’t we just eat?”

“Yes, you can eat my dust!”

To enhance his words, a small poof of dust appeared in front of my lips, and swirled around me, forcing me to close my eyes once more.

“Discord!”

Jumping up from the cloth-and kicking over some glasses in the process- I chased after him, while he giggled like mad and ran on all fours. Approaching another hill, he spread out his wings and flew up, with me jumping after him, only to fall face-first into the light green grass surrounding me. The chase was over, and now I was positively disgruntled, to say the least.

Spiraling up in the air, he laughed as I coughed up dirt, soon diving back down and sitting beside me.

“Ha! You should see yourse-”

Grabbing a hoof-full of dirt myself, I gave my best throw, and it ended up leading straight on his face. Cracking a grin, I spoke out.

“Even a lady will get her hooves dirty when it’s as hilarious as this.” I gathered more clumps of dirt and aimed it at his head. It landed with a splat directly covering his eyes this time.. His mouth twisted into a frown as he snapped his claw and a vacuum, already running, popped into existence as he vacuumed the dirt from his messy face. I fell back and laughed, failing to notice the enormous clump of mud flying at tremendous speed towards me. A splat and a laugh was audible.

“Oh, It. Is. On!”

Before long, what was seen as a peaceful meadow filled with rolling hills and serene atmosphere was now a battlefield with clumps of dirt, mud, and grass being aimed back and forth, and back and forth again.

Somehow the psychological effect that dirt had on me was, well, not effective because I kept grabbing even more of the substance of forgotten abomination. I eventually forgot why I was doing it but I kept at it with simpers and guffaws till my bemire hooves and limbs cramped.

I thought it was finally over as I took deep breaths and hunkered down. Oh how wrong I was. Expect the unexpected with Dissy. Especially when he instantly appears with a levitating pile and drops it- Did I just call him Dissy?

Leaning up and just dodging the projectile aimed at me, I screamed at the top of my lungs.

“DISSY!  OH CELESTIA WHY! OF ALL THE POSSIBLE THINGS THIS IS THE WORST. POSSIBLE. THING!”

“...”

“Oh Rarity,” the draconequus said, snapping his claws repeatedly in front of me, “My dear, dear Rarity, snap out of it. I will throw another pile of… let’s say feculence at you if you don’t wake up.”

At the mention of ‘pile’ I scooped up hoof-fulls of dirt and tackled him, sending him backwards with a filthy muzzle as I climbed onto his chest and made his face as one with the surrounding earth. I kept on doing so until I feared he couldn’t breathe, swiping some off his nostrils before my weary body gave in.

“I… I haven’t had that much fun inyears,” I pant while laying my head on his chest for a while. “Maybe it’s because Sweetie Belle showed up. I don’t know.”

“Well,” Discord had his mischievous tone again, “I’m kind of fancying your fun.”

“What do yo-” I started but then I noticed. If anypony saw both of us in our current position he or she would think that we were a couple. My face turned beet but somehow I did not want to move. Was I tired? Was I just too occupied with hearing his heart beat? What is it, for Celestia’s sake! For my sake!

“Well, somebody looks adorably confused on my chest,” a voice purred from below me. I tried to look down, but I felt a claw going through my mane. My head instantly froze, and I choked down the urge to scream ‘assault’, seeing as I usually never let anybody touch my mane. Even Aloe and Lotus would receive a scolding if they so much as grazed it.

Just as I was about to say something though, I felt myself smack against the ground as Discord teleported away, laughing and wiping the mud off his face.

“Oh, you should’ve seen that cute little flustered look you had!”

I felt my face go redder.

“You-I-My mane!”

I then eeped as I realized Discord’s talons had been muddy, and too my horror feeling the wet, squishy substance in my hair. Looking up to him, I grinded my teeth savagely and let my mouth run tempestuously.

“Nobody dares to mess with my mane, Discord! I work on it for hours, and even if you're slightly attractive you have no rights to mess with it! At all. Same with the fact that I may or may not like you! Mess with it again, Dissy, and I will literally gouge out your ey- …”

I felt myself grow silent at the realization of what I’d just said.