F**kin the odds

Once i had reached the highway i noticed that the highway was unharmed and unusally clean. I began to pick up speed until i hit 150MPH.(my car was a NAS race car from the 80's to the 90's) while i was racing along i noticed something alive crying on the side of the road and i came to a screaching halt. I took my shotgun(just in case)and got out of my car and went to the the crying creature. As i cocked my gun with a *click-clack* it looked up to me in fear. It WAS alive!it looked like a pony i think. It was cyan blue and had rainbow colored hair that kinda looked like my hair. But my hair was black. As i got closer it started to whimper in fear."Hey,hey its alright, its okay i'm not gonna hurt you."i said trying to calm it down."my name is matt murdock, what's yours."i said with a relaxing smile."m-my n-name is r-rainb-bow dash." it said. I was a little taken back by this. "Wait wait wait,you can TALK!? I said in a paniced tone of voice. 'HOW CAN A MOTHERFUCKING PONY TALK! i thought while panicing."so wait a sec,if you can talk,how would you fly". I asked,curious."Oh that's simple,i'm a pegasus"it said in a girly cheerful yoice,so i guessed that it was female."A pegawhat?" i asked confused."a pegasus." she said."it's a type of pony that can fly as easely as a bird"."and may i ask what the hay are you?"she said."Oh i'm a hum- WHAT THE FAHK IS THAT!?!?!?
I screamed,making rainbow dash look around in horror."WE HAVE TO GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE RAINBOW!!!!!!!" i yelled. She just nodded and stood up,only to be knocked right back over.i noticed she had both a broken wing and a broken leg. I then grabbed her,which caused her to flinch. But she realized i was trying to help her. I then sprinted to my car. once i had her in my arms.i went around the car and opened the door and put her in the seat. I then jumped the hood of the car.when the zombie hord was close i jumped in the car and turned the key. The sound of a muscle car starting filled the air. When it was started i flipped 'er into first gear and that started the hit points. Rainbow covered her ears, which caused me to feel guilty."Hey rainbow"i said."You don't have to cover your ears because it's loud,you just have to get used to it. You just have to feel it,let it flow through you,let the purr of the engine ring in your ears,then you'll truly get used to this beast." i said,which caused her to smile.then,suddenly,out of fahking nowhere, this portal appeares. And we drove right through it! Once i noticed this,i slammed on my brakes the best i could. When we went through the other side i came to a complete almost instantly. I looked over to rainbow,which looked over to me. We were right in front of a tree."the library!"dashy said as she leaped out of the window,almost forgetting she had injuries. She landed on the ground with a thud."oops,sorry"she said.
"don't worry 'bout it,right now i'm more worried about gettin' you safe and healthy." With that,i picked rainbow dash up and went inside the library. Once we were inside i instantly heard screaming in fronf of me."Twilight what are you screaming about." rainbow said when i put her on the couch."T-T-That THING!!!!!"twilight screamed. A knife mysteriously levatated itself off the counter in the kicthen and flung itself at me. Luckiley i dodged it."WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT TWILIGHT!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?"rainbow dash and i screamed at twilight,i could of sworn she got smaller."what the HAY are you"twilight asked in confusion."Hey rainbow,care to do the honers?"i asked knowing she knew the awnser