Der Metzger Herr Messer

I looked up as I packed away the spit and doused the coals. A puff of steam rose into the air as a few pegasus floated across the sky. I grimaced and watched as a bright flash ripped through the crowds.

Scheiße.

I picked up the spit and carried it into my shop. The security pony was already gone and the griffon was lazily picking at her beak with her right talon. "Hey boss, went well I think."

I nodded and walked behind the counter. I looked around the shelves until I found my surprise. I grabbed two bottles and two mugs and lifted them up onto the bloodstained counter. I pressed a bottle against the counter and slammed the cap off. The beers found new homes in the mugs and I took out a bit coin from the till. I held it up to the griffon and nodded.

I bounced the coin off the counter and watched as it flew into her drink. It landed with a plop and sank straight to the bottom. The griffon fixed a feather on her head and grabbed the mug. "Alright...I get ya." She picked up her mug and slammed it. The coin was spat out onto the counter. "Easy."

I picked up the coin and reached for another beer. I held the coin for her and poured another drink. "Oh no...seriously?"

I nodded and finished. I made the motion I'd used with the coin and leaned against the counter.

The griffon let out a nervous laugh. "So I aim for yours, right?"

I shrugged. The griffon narrowed her eyes and bounced the coin on the counter. It bounced up and landed back against the fine wood. I passed the coin back to her. She tried again, this time managing to hit the rim of my glass. She tried again and the coin sank to the bottom of her glass again. I smiled grimly as she scratched her head. "I don't think I'm good at this."

I stayed against the counter and kept pouring as she tried to nail my glass. "Shit." She drank again. "Piss!" And again, and again still. The coin was slowly getting bent as she tossed it harder and harder against the counter. "Fkcu htis!" She slammed her face into the counter and groaned.

I looked under the counter and found only a paper box. I laughed breathlessly to myself and leaned my head into my hands. "Waht!?" The griffon shoved me slightly. "Waht fnnuy!?"

I rubbed my face and looked at my beer, untainted and without metal. I slammed it back and put the mugs under the counter. The griffon glared at me, her face a flushed hazy red under her blue feathers. I pointed to the door. She looked over and got onto all fours. She sidestepped to her right and slammed side first into the counter. She stayed leaned against it as she walked towards the way out from behind the counter.

She walked out into the main floor and switched leans. She peeled off the counter and tipped over the soup pot. The empty metalpiece rolled away as the griffon tried to dig her talons into the floor. "Kfuc." She laid down and tried to reach for the door. "I nact...." She flopped down and flapped one wing. "Lehp...medic." She reached up and let her arm go limp. "Help...help.... Help."

I rubbed my face and grabbed a note. I wrote down the griffon's address and hopped the counter. It groaned under my weight and my knee popped as I landed. I stretched my leg and grabbed the drunk. She was tiny compared to me, or perhaps I was bigger compared to them all.

I carried her outside into the rainy afternoon. The overhang in front of our shop kept us dry until I could flag down a rickshaw. The pony pulled up off the road and onto the walk next to us. "In!"

I carried my drunk worker into the cart and handed off the note with a few bits. The driver took off as soon as I stepped back and left me standing in the rain for a few moments. I turned to head up to my home and walked thigh first into Ayranne. She was soaked, and her expression was one of defeated anger. "I'm wet."

I nodded slowly.

She huffed and looked up at me, her eyes knocked down from her usual angry glare. "I need a towel."

I nodded and looked up to my stairs. I pointed up and held my arm out for her to go.

She sighed and walked up the steps with me swiftly after her. I reached over her and unlocked the door. She whipped my ribs with her tail and walked in. "Oh god." She stopped in the door and forced me to go around her side. "...It's...."

I looked inside my home. The large Equestrian and Bavarian banners were still hanging and waving their greetings. I pushed past the mare and stepped up to the door. I turned to face her, making sure to leave room for her to pass should she choose.

Aryanne bit her lower lip and jerked forward. She hesitated for a few moments before heading inside. "Go go, door closed. Cold outside." She slid herself past me rather roughly, her tail curled around my leg as she peeled away. I stared at the outside world for a few moments. The rainy Canterlot street seemed to know something I didn't, as the rain grew heavier and the rushing ponies spaced out.

I felt my frown tug hard at me for a moment.

Scheiße.

I let the door slowly shut. The sound of gasps could be heard from within my apartment. "What is this!? What is all this!?"

I rubbed my face and took a deep breath. I was a man built for war and strength, not tiny ponies, yet tiny ponies I did entertain.