Applebloom sets the final barrel in the back of Big Mac's truck and waves to him, kicking the tailgate up.

It drives away, and Applebloom unties her bow-turned doo-rag and sighs in contentment Normal... just what ah needed.

"HI~!" someone yells from above her.

Applebloom groans and rubs the bridge of her nose Spoke too soon...

She looks up and something falls towards her, a human-shaped object "... Shit" Applebloom extends her arms and catches the falling person, the glimmer of the metal jetpack blinding her for a moment "Sweetie, stop literally droppin- mm!"

Diamond lowers her neck, grinning at Applebloom "Gotcha~"

Applebloom shakes her head and glares at Diamond "What the hay?!"

Diamond rolls her eyes "What? Just because I wasn't in the ninth castle doesn't mean that I can't drop in unannounced."

Applebloom sighs and relaxes her arms, dropping diamond who squeaks "An' ah just dropped you unannounced."

Diamond glares and unclips the belts holding her to the jetpack "That wasn't funny."

Applebloom grins "Then why am ah laughin' inside?"

"Because you're an uncivilized mud-girl."

Applebloom's grin widens to sinister proportions and she hefts Diamond over her shoulder like a sack of potatoes "Wh-where are you taking me?"

Applebloom walks off into the orchard, ignoring Diamond's questions and flailing.

There it is... heh, ah'm gonna catch hell for this... but so worth it. Applebloom thinks to herself and lifts Diamond off her shoulder and holds her like she was a loaf of bread from the oven, her legs and shoulders dangling.

Diamond moves her head to look under her and her eyes shrink to pinpricks "Y-you wouldn't... that's not right! no fair! No fair! I call Hacks! HACKS!!"

Applebloom grins and moves on of her arms to cup Diamond's wide-eyed face "Why of course... ah would." she tosses Diamond's shrieking body into the large mud pool full of mostly dirt and bits of vegetation.

The splash nearly gets Applebloom who jumps back and starts belly laughing "To-totally worth it!!"

Diamond lies face-down limp, un responsive to the laughter.

Applebloom's laughing turns to giggles as she checks on her friend "Diamond? You oka- whoa!" Diamond's hand shoots up and grabs Applebloom's shirt, pulling her into the pool as well.

Applebloom jerks out of it, sputtering "Augh! Ah had my mouth open!"

Diamond laughs "Serves you right. Now we're both mud-people... or mud Demons! My bite is deadly!"

Applebloom laughs "That's from some kind of show, ain't it?"

Diamond nods, wiping a bit of mud from her lips "Yeah, Chronicles of Riddickulous. Pretty good, poor CGI early on though."

Applebloom sighs "Well, we're covered in mud, you wanna go to your house an' get clean?"

"Why? I can just borrow some of Applejack's clothing and wash here."

Applebloom starts to imagine her sister's reaction and shrugs "Sure, let's ask first though, otherwise she'll think Rainbow got in again."

Applejack yawns, scratching her head "Ya know, you'd think ya would try somethin' new."

Rainbow, pinned under Applejack's body, grins "Hey, what can I say, I like the tried and true. Like when the Flim Flam brothers came the first time and we had the cider contest. They lost because we stayed cool and kept to old standbys."

Applejack looks at Rainbow "Well said."

Rainbow shrugs "Hey, I have more than a awesome body and a gorgeous personality."

Applejack rolls her eyes "An' modest to boot."

"Exactly!"

Applebloom tosses a rock at Applejack's window, prompting her to carry Rainbow by the collar to the window "Whatcha need?"

"we were wonderin' if Daimond could borrow a pair of your clothes! We fell into a mud pool and her house is too far away." Applebloom answers.

"Ask if they had mud wrestling!" Rainbow yells, struggling to escape her tracksuit.

Daimond snaps her fingers "I should've though of that!"

The Apple sisters level flat looks at their companions and shake their head slowly "Yeah, that's fine! I'll put 'em outside my door."

The window closes and Rainbow makes a pleading face "Mercy?"

Applejack grins wickedly "Ah think some time in th' empty press is what ya need."

Rainbow starts writhing "NO! I'm claustrophobic! Stop! NOOOOOO!!!"

Applebloom sighs, pulling her muddy shirt over her head.

Diamond, having already undressed, looks around the bathroom "There isn't enough room in here..."

Applebloom shrugs "So ya wanna go first or somethin'?"

Diamond shakes her head "Isn't there an outdoor shower?"

Applebloom nods "But that's mostly to cool off or somethin'. 'Course, we have bar soap out there too..."

Diamond smiles "I can go without shampooing..."

Applebloom shrugs and grabs two towels and follows but pauses and punches the shower curtain, hitting someone "Stay outta th' showers Scootaloo."

Scootaloo stumbles out of the tub, holding her nose "Dubly noded... where Brainbow?"

"Last ah saw, bein' dragged by my sister."

Scootaloo takes off, still holding her nose.

"Perverts..." Applebloom mutters.

Diamond stares up at the long strip of shower heads attached to the back of the house itself "Does this only do cold?"

Applebloom points to a red metal knob "No, what kind of hicks do you think we are?"

"Muddy ones." Diamond replies before both erupt into laughter "Yeh, ya got me there."

Diamond turns the knob and a cascade of water comes down onto her, eliciting a jerk backwards and a shrill shriek.

Applebloom shivers "Sheesh, are all fancy-type girls so... shrill?"

Diamond, looking like a kitten that had a bucket of water thrown on it, glares at her "Th-th-that's n-n-not fuh-funny..."

Applebloom chuckles "Anyways, it should be ready..."

Diamond extends a single finger to feel the water and pulls it back "HOT!!"

Applebloom chuckles and turns the other knob and cups some of the water and pours it onto Diamond's head "Better?"

Diamond nods and stands, still shivering and jumps under the water, sighing "Perfect... where's the soap?"

Applebloom tosses a bar to her but Diamond flinches and ducks, the bar soaring over her head.

Diamond blushes "I'll get it!"

Applebloom rolls her eyes but stops, grinning deviously Well, this might make her forget about th' puddle...

Diamond had bent over to pick up the soap bar (Something you never do. Ever. Seriously, some one will kick you. Or worse... inject you with Sodium Pentothal)

It was at the moment before Applebloom struck that this universal rule occurred to Diamond Oh cra- "AH!" she threw her head back, feeling Applebloom's fingers on the small of her back "Hey, you okay?"

Diamond nods and jerks up to stand, the bar in her hand "Yeah... some wind got me..."

Applebloom shrugs and takes the bar "You get my back, ah get yours?"

Diamond nods and stands under the shower head Ahhh... that's nice, though... mud might ruin my hair, but whatever, always wanted to use an outdoor shower...

Applebloom walked up behind her and grabbed Diamond's breasts "Hey, are these things gettin' bigger?"

Diamond moans, her body rising in temerature "Nuaah... no... stop it... someone'll hear..."

Applebloom grins "Oh? Ah thought ya liked danger."

Diamond bites her lip and breaks away "I'm not... I mean, I do... but... not here..."

Applebloom fake pouts "Oh? If you're fine with in th' middle of a store, why not behind th' house?"

Diamond pauses and relents "Okay... you win..."

Applebloom grins and motions for Diamond to turn around.

Diamond does, but with a little apprehension "I thought you wanted to get my back..."

Applebloom nods and pulls Diamond into a hug, rubbing the soap into Diamond's back while she dances her fingers across the small of Diamond's back again "Ah am... don't mean ah can't enjoy doin' it."

Diamond's breath hitches suddenly, because someone was watching.

"... Well shoot, can't use this ta get more from Rich... carry on young'uns" Granny Smith says, walking away.

Applebloom looks behind her just in time to see her grandmother leave "... Ah suddenly don't feel so good..."

Diamond nods and steps back from Applebloom "We... should just finish washing and get out of Dodge."

Applebloom glares "That ain't funny."

Diamond giggles "Yes it was, anyways..." she steps into the stream of water from the shower heads "Thanks for getting my back... and then some..."

Applebloom blushes and passes the soap to Diamond "You get clean, ya got dirtier than me anyways."

Rainbow Dash presses her back to the wall in front of Applebloom's room, a plain pair of panties in her teeth Okay Dash, you can switch these with the ones AJ gave them... and all I need to do is slip the remote into Bloom's pants... heheheh... I'm a fucking genius.

She grabs the plain panties sitting on top of the folded outfit and stuffs them into her tracksuit before placing the ones she had in her mouth in their place "Perfect!"

Looking both ways, she darts into Applebloom's room and opens the window, removing the barrier set to keep Scootaloo out "Squirt owes me big... though she did set me free so... meh, GERONIMOOO!!!"

She jumps out the window and pulls a cord on her hip and wings unfurl from her tracksuit, turning it into a gliding suit "WORTH EVERY PENNY!!!"

Applebloom loops her belt around her waist but notices something in her pocket "What... huh, wonder what this does...?"

Diamond finishes her braiding and sighs "You know... so far today has been normal. Must be because Sweetie Belle isn't around?"

Applebloom shrugs "Ah think it happens whenever th' three of us're together."

Diamond chuckles "Maybe... I wonder what Babs and Silvy are up to..."

Babs stumbles out of the bathroom, her face pale "Ugh... need some juice..."

Silver follows, face red as an apple "I'm so sorry, I lost control-"

Babs shakes her head "Nah, shoulda stopped ya... gonna go lay down... fer a minute."

Silver bites her lip, the taste of blood lingering "Oh god am I glad I'm a compulsive tooth brusher... juice... need to find some juice..."

Sweetie Belle looks up from her videogame "Hey Babs, why do you look so pale?"

"Ah was th' usual. 'Less I'm runnin', fixin', or shootin', I'm clumsy."

Sweetie nods "I understand, Rarity says I'd lose my head if Sweetie hadn't put a magnetic swivel cup my neck."

Babs sticks her pinkie in her ear and wipes the wax on her pants "Come again?"

"Oh! My head is kept in place by a magnetic swivel cup, it keeps it from falling off and lets me move my head around like a human's, though... it's still detachable..."

Silver walks in, a glass of orange juice in her hands "What's going on?"

Babs shrugs "Iono, but if ya figure it out, could'ya tell me?"

Silver's brow knits in confusion "Okay...?"

Sweetie walks into the room with a controller in her hands "Okay! Pee break is over! Prepare to lose Bot!"

Babs and Silver look from one Sweetie to the other in confusion "What in the name of Siddhartha is going on?!"

The Sweetie sitting on the couch cocks her head "We're playing Super Mareio Grand Prix?"

Babs gasps and whips out a pistol and points it at the first Sweetie's head "ROBOT!"

She rolls her eyes and plucks the gun from Bab's hands with her thumb and index fingers and throws it over her shoulder "Silver, have you ever noticed how people's scientific curiosity diminishes when there are guns in their hands?"

The second Sweetie laughs "Nice reference, Sweetie Bot."

Bot grins "I try. Now... I WIN!!"

Sweetie's jaw drops "Hey! I wasn't paying attention!!"

Babs stares at the gun on the ground in shock "H-how..."

Bot grins shyly and pulls her head off her shoulders "Eheheh... I told you, I'm an android."

Silver shivers and scoots away from the headless Bot "H-how is this possible?! R-robots aren't... they're just stories or programs!"

Sweetie rolls her eyes "They do exist, but Bot is different, she doesn't have the rules in her program."

Babs jumps and recovers her gun, leveling at Bot's blinking head "Sweetie... Th' rules're supposed to be written inta every Artificial Intelligence, that's why dey're th' laws!"

Bot puts her head back on her shoulders "Haven't you ever seen I AI? The only way to ensure cohabitation is to have the rules expunged. I thought that you wouldn't be an Anti Ferro-Sapient."

Babs grits her teeth "Usually, but ah still don't trust bots, dey give me th' creeps."

Bot sighs "What would it take to prove that I'm not evil?"

Silver shivers "Sweetie, I'm all for philosophical debates, but this? This is something that I can't even begin to rationalize."

"Come on Sweetie, let's just play. Everyone's afraid of me..."

Babs lowers her gun a little "Sorry... too many hours readin' robot uprisin' books. So... do ya think your alive? I mean... do ya think ya have a... soul?"

"Of course I do. I can rationalize abstract ideas, think for myself, seek the company of others, and I feel empathy. I'm just as human as you are, but I just happen to be mechanical. The brain is just an organic computer, why should a synthetic one be any different?" she scowls "Oh come on! I thought we disabled Blue Eggs!"

"Probably just hanging ou- Eeep!!" Diamond jumps with a squeak, a soft buzzing emanating from her panties.

"What's th' matter?" Applebloom asks, putting the remote in her pocket.

"I think there's a vibrator in my pants..." Diamond replies, shuddering.

Applebloom pulls the remote from her pocket and turns the knob. Diamond relaxes her body and falls onto the bed "Scootaloo's doing?"

"Probably Dash." Applebloom says, tossing the remote to Diamond "Here, hold onto this."

Diamond nods and Applebloom looks through her dresser "Wanna borrow a pair of mine 'til ya get home?"

She nods and quickly changes, stuffing the vibrator panties into her pocket "No sense in throwing away a fine product."

Applebloom rolls her eyes and lays next to Diamond "So whattaya wanna do now?"

Diamond blushes "Well... I kinda have an idea... but you'll say no..."

Applebloom quirks an eyebrow "What is it?"

"Uhm... does your family still brand livestock?"

"... Not recently, we just chip 'em, why?"

Diamond bites her lip "W-well... I kinda-"

Applebloom shivers "No, ah know what your gonna say, an' there is no way in hell that ah'm doin' that to another human bein'. Least of all you."

Diamond whimpers "I knew it... I'm a freak..."

"Can't disagree there."

"But is it so wrong? I think it'll be better than getting a tattoo!" Diamond pleads.

Applebloom shakes her head "No. Ah ain't brandin' ya. No way, no how."

"Please? I'll do anything!! I would do it myself but I don't have any branding irons..."

"ain't nothin' ya can do. Now jus'-"

"But I want to!! Please, I'm begging you!!"

Applebloom glares at her "An' ah won't do it! Brandin' people ain't right!"

Diamond pouts "You're mean..."

"Ah ain't mean. How 'bout this, if ya can convince at least one of our friends that it's a good idea, ah'll do it... an' Scoots don't count."

Diamond grins "I can do that!"

"Nope, not happenin'" Babs replies, bluntly.

Silver shakes her head in amazement "No, why on Earth are you so... strange?"

"I dunno Diamond... I have to agree with the others and say no." Sweetie mutters, twiddling her fingers nervously.

Diamond's face drops "Awww..."

"See, told ya they wouldn't like it, 'sides, can't have your perfect skin gettin' too sensitive." Applebloom says, running a finger up Diamond's back.

Diamond stiffens "Mmmph... tease."

Sweetie Bot enters with a platter of sandwiches in one hand, a bucket of ice and several two-litre sodas in the other "We're out of Dr. Pony."

Applebloom takes th bucket and platter "Thanks for doin' this Bot."

Sweetie bot shrugs "Kind of the reason I was built, so that Sweetie doesn't start a pandemic in the kitchen."

"That only happen half a dozen times! All of you and the FDA won't let it go!" Sweetie groans.

"Half-"

"She made a new strain of swine flu makin' bacon, skin-petrifyin' fungus when she wanted to make a mushroom pizza, and a whole bunch of other things." Applebloom replies, biting into her sandwich.

Babs turns to Sweetie "How Did'ya manage that an' then some?!"

"I can't cook, okay?! I can build a cold fusion reactor out of an old deepfreeze and an MRI machine, but I can't make toast!" Sweetie yells, embarrassed.

"Or get water from th' tap an it turns into a chunk of burnt carbon. Sweetie, your cookin' makes th' laws of physics cry."

Sweetie crosses her arms and pouts.

Diamond giggles "I guess that everyone has a chink in their armor, yours is just cooking... though if the casserole monster you made that one time is anything to go by, you could use it to wage war on evil! Or good... up to you."

Sweetie smiles "Yeah... I couldn't do spandex though, I couldn't stand the breeze."

"Hey... any of you see Scoots?"

Everyone shakes teir head and Applebloom sighs "She's prolly fine."

"I AM NOT OKAY!!!" Scootaloo yells, tied up and stuck to a tree via sap.

Angel Bunny, aided by his translator and exo-suit (Guess who built that) "Silence! You will be quiet and act as compliant bait for the Bone Renderer."

"Probably" Silver agrees "Wonder what's on Discovery Kids... Hey! Mini-Equines is on! And it's the five year episode! Remember this?"

Sweetie and Bot wipe their eyes "Y-yeah... let's watch it."

Author's Note

Sorry about the wait, surgery sucks like space. And not even a hundredth as awesome.

Know what's awesome? The newest episode!

I am still crying, and I've seen it twice! I mean... No spoilers! Sorries, watch it yourself!

Now... I have the power to write. FORWARD!!!

In memoriam of MFM's Crusade into the deep caves of anonymity, for this writer's work has lost the lustre it was known for.