Journal entry - April 4, 2015
I'm sorry I haven't be able to write much, I've been super busy with all of the doctors preparing me for the surgery thats in a month. They told me again that it would help me get to learning better. I'm not sure how it would work though...They told me some of the risks and...Well to sum to up most of them was Death, But they said it has a very small chance of happening.

That's the only thing i'm worried about.

Fluttershy's in the hospital, She's gotten very sick. I asked Twilight if I would stay with her while she recovers but she said, "Until we can figure out what she has we can't let anyone near her." I felt sad...very sad, I was ready to cry...I think I was actually crying already. An unknown disease? A parasite? Thoughts of what she could have were flooding my mind. Twilight told me not to worry and that they were gonna do everything they could to help her. This made me feel a little better...but not much.

That's all I have for today.

Journal entry - April 12, 2015

Twilight said that I don't need to write every day, as long as I can remember what happened.

Fluttershy is still in the hospital, I heard Twilight talking to some other ponies about it. I think they were friends. They was the Rainbow one who told me what the surgery would do the first time who was now wearing what looked like a track suit. Another had Pink hair, her outfit is too odd to explain. Another was sorta Southern with blond hair. They last one had white elegant clothes on and Blue elegant looking hair.

They're all crying. Twilight was too as she said. "We'll start Fluttershy on chemo immediately..." Chemo, What's that? I walk around the corner and ask what's wrong.

"O-oh...(wipes eyes) I wanted to speak with you...you can see Fluttershy now."

"I-i can?! Thank you!" I hug her tightly, she hugs back and I feel something wet my shoulder...her tears. "Why are you all crying? Fluttershy's fine now right...?"

They look at eachother. "Um...yes Eclipse Fluttershy is fine but...we need to keep her in the hospital for a while..."

I start to ask why but she stops me. "Please don't ask why."

I nod slowly. "When can I see her?"

"You can now...but you have to finish your Journal entry yes? Once you do we can leave."

I nod and rush off.

That's it for today, I'm so happy to be with Fluttershy again!

Journal entry - April 20, 2015
I can't believe it but...Fluttershy is still sick. When I got to her room I was so happy, I had her favorite chocolates which I almost dropped at the sight of her. She was starting to lose her hair and fur. She smiled when she saw me. I feel tears creep into my eyes.

I walk to her and she notices the chocolates, which are in a Heart shaped box.

"Are those f-for me...?" Her voice and raspy and dry, Far from her normal angelic voice.

"Y-yea..." I hand them to her, she grabs them and drops them. Luckily they land on the bed.

"Sorry..." She starts to pick them up and can barely lift them. I pick them up and she scoots over enough so I can get in the hospital bed with her.

I get in and open the box. I pick up a piece and guide it into her mouth. It takes her a second to chew and swallow it. It takes her longer to do the same for me. I chew and swallow. We look into eachothers eyes and smile. T F

That was...8 days ago I think? Fluttershy has only gotten worse...I have to help her do everything. I don't mind, As long as I'm with my love. I wouldn't care if we the only people in the world...because right now we were to each other. I haven't left fluttershys side since I got here. We sleep holding eachother. I usually cry after she's fallen asleep...She will get better I know she will.

I am going to stop writing until the surgery.

Journal entry May 22, 2015

I told Fluttershy the surgery is today. She seemed very sad. I told her I would be back as soon as it was over...I asked Twilight if we could share the same bed and she said that as long as I didn't hit my head it would be fine.

I...I did somthing I thought I never would. I made love to Fluttershy that night. We already had before but...it was special that night. I...I'm not comfortable writing that part out. We kept saying how much we loved each other all night until we fell asleep in eachothers arms.

***
Journal entry May 23, 2015
I am sitting in a wheel chair with my head bandaged. I am slowly rolled into fluttershys room to see her bed surrounded by those ponies from earlier. Her family it there too. "What's going on...?"

I hear a raspy, "Eclipse...?" Her friends move aside to reveal fluttershy...she looks awful...how could this happen?! She...she looked bad before but now was...

I rush over and grab her hand gently. "W-what's wrong Love...?"

"It's time...I'm sorry...I love you so much..."

I feel hot streaks of tears on my cheeks. "I love you so much too Fluttershy..." I kiss her softly. She kisses back and slowly lets go of my hand and falls limp. I hear her heart monitor, "Beeeep" signaling her death. I pull away from the kiss and hug her lifeless body muttering through my tears. "No...no...please..." I hear everyone cry behind me.

I don't think i'll be writing for a while.

Journal entry July 16, 2015

I don't know why I am still writing this...its been two months since I lost the love of my life. I stay in my old house now...My parents died a few years ago so I inherited the house. I haven't left it for those two months. The operation was a failure...I'm not sure if I wrote that in the last entry...I don't want to go back and read that. I've only been able to think of Fluttershy. I miss her. I have cried every day for her. ~~I don't think I can take it anymore.~~ Twilight has asked to see me but I tell her to go away. My life is nothing but sadness. It will all end soon

This is my last entry. I have to be with fluttershy, I don't care where, when, or how But i have to.

"I say I don't care anymore but, the truth is I care too much."

"It's so hard to forget someone when they gave you so much to remember."

I end this with Eight letters, three words, and one regret. I Miss you.
******

As I finish the last sentence and slowly close the book. I sit in a chair and look at a photo of Fluttershy and me smiling. So happy...

Tears fill my eyes, I set it back and smile. "I'll be there soon My love." I take a handful of pills and feel my chest hurt immensely. I grab my heart and arch my back. I look at the picture and smile. "Soon..." Everything suddenly fades to black.

Author's Note

:'( I'm sorry...I couldn't do it anymore. I never want to do anything sad again.