Canterlot High OSS: Gerald's Secret Weapon

Gerald pulled in to the driveway at the Pie house to discover that he was the last one to arrive. "Glad you could make it, considerin' you're the one who called this meeting," Jackie said.

"I hope you will bear with such idiosyncrasies," Gerald said.

"There's another word I'd use, but I'd use it for another member of our little company."

"Touche. The others are..?"

"Waiting up in Pinkie's room,"

"Is that wise, inviting a young man up to one's private chamber?"

"It's the only place we'll get the privacy to discuss classified matters."

"True,"

"At least, that's what Twila said to say,"

"After you,"

"Who ever said chivalry was dead?" Jackie said, leading the way.

"Chivalry is dead, or rather it's pure myth. This is me being practical, since I've never been where we're going."

"You just had to go and spoil the moment." Jackie understood 'practical,' dressing either in jeans or jean-shorts and a simple blouse, like the ones she used while she was farming, which was probably what she had been doing before Gerald's call. Of the six, only Felicia, Pinkie, and Rochelle normally wore dresses or skirts -- Felicia's were modest, Rochelle's were flashy or stylish, and Pinkie's were... whatever she felt like.

"Sorry,"

"Never you mind," Jackie said, soon pushing the door open. Pinkie's bedroom was spacious for one person, and could arguably hold three asleep and still not feel cramped. Apparently, though, all six had recently slept here while they came up with a song for the final confrontation against the Sirens. It was appropriate that they use the same location to discuss how to deal with the de-powered Dazzlings. Felicia and Ro were seated on the bed with their backs against the headboard. Elle sat near the foot of the bed on her side. She was wearing a black dress, where Ro wore a light blue one. Gerald checked to be sure they were who they were supposed to be. Rae was sitting backwards at the desk chair, while Pinkie was cross-legged on the floor between the bed and the desk. Twila was sitting in one of two spare chair in front of Pinkie's entertainment system, while Jackie took the other as soon as she entered the room.

"The floor's all yours, so to speak," Pinkie said, laughing again.

"Why thank you," Gerald said wryly. He closed the door, and then stood in front of it. "The reason I've asked you all to assemble here is because I believe we need to come up with a solution to the Dazzlings' current living problems. We are, after all, the ones who left them in this world without the benefit of having even restricted powers. They're not used to that, so it's our responsibility to help them get along with the world."

"Wait a minute," Rayne said, "these guys nearly took over the school by brainwashing everyone, staff included, and you want to help them?"

"Indeed," Gerald nodded. "Regardless of how long they've survived before now, they always had their power at their disposal. Now they have to eat, sleep, have shelter, be clothed, and cooperate just like everyone else."

"Judging by how they were acting, that's not going to be easy," Ro said.

"They did seem to argue a lot," Felicia said.

"Teamwork will be a significant concern," Twila said.

"Right, and they have to earn money, which means they need to get a job. Or jobs," Jackie said. Out of all the friends, she was the only one who could lay claim to a job, and she had it because it was something her big brother, Mark, and her little sister, Beatrice, both did. It was a family business.

"Correct again," Gerald said.

"You wouldn't have come to us without at least a basic plan, after all, we need to prepare for the next attack," Twila said.

"Care to share?" Rae asked.

"For some reason I'm thinking that's my line," Pinkie said. "Nevermind," she said, smiling. "I'm not upset!"

"Indeed I will share what I have, and then I would appreciate your opinions so we can develop a real action plan.

"I've already outlined the most basic human needs, and regardless of being Sirens in Equestria, the Dazzlings are now human. These needs are food, clothing, shelter, and companionship. Everyone needs food regularly, and the Dazzlings can no longer inspire malice and feed off it. Any clothing other than what they have on their backs is something they would need to buy. Shelter is equal to scraps outside of a regular dwelling place. And we've already seen that their teamwork's a mess, and they're unlikely to attract more friends unless they change their attitudes."

"Assuming they only have what they're carrying and don't have a home, their most pressing need will be to get some money to pay for the other things they need," Elle said.

"Why are we assuming they don't have a home?" Felicia asked.

"Because they haven't stayed at anything that could be called that since they ran from us at the end of the Battle of the Bands."

"How do you know that?" Rayne asked.

"Because I've used my surveillance recordings to track them through the city. The good news is that they're still here. The bad news is that they're pretty well dug-in, and if we're going to give them any worthwhile help, we have to get them to you," Gerald nodded to Twila, "or to me."

"Unless you go to them instead," Pinkie said.

"I'll likely need to be able to set up some equipment if I need to make anything for them, so I think we do need to convince them to come to us. But we can't do that unless we can convince them of the value of coming, and unless we can get them to trust us not to do them harm."

"Considering what happened the last time we met, that may be pretty hard," Felicia said.

"I think we have to try," Twila said.

"So what kind of 'value' are we talking about here?" Elle asked. "Giving them money won't do any good once they run out again."

"I could bake some apple pies or brown Betties or something," Jackie said.

"Ooh, I could help," Pinkie said.

"She and I could make some fabulous clothes, and a satchel to carry everything in," Ro said, pointing to Elle, who was nodding: as part of her disguise, she had all of Rochelle's memories to a point, and could copy her non-magical skills. And since, at least until recently, magic had been too subtle in this world to use very easily, that meant Elle could use almost all of Ro's skills.

"But again, what happens when they need more?" Elle asked, no longer nodding.

"'You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink,'" Jackie said.

"You could always just ask him if he wanted a drink," Twila said, "or does he want something else?"

"It's an expression. It means that you can't get anyone to just go and do what you want them to, not even for their own good."

"Isn't this more 'give a man a fish and he'll eat for a day; Teach a man to fish and he'll eat for a lifetime?'" Felicia said. "Unless..."

"No, you're right," Rayne said, "because whatever we do for these guys, they need to be able to keep doing it once we, or they, walk away."

"If we're going to teach them about something they don't have, why not friendship?" Twila asked.

"They may or may not be receptive to 'friendship' after being beaten by it. 'Teamwork?' 'Cooperation?'"

"But we need to teach them fast, so it has to be something simpler," Rayne said. "They won't get it otherwise, I think."

"Agreed. We need to think of something elementary that we know they need, and that we can give them," Gerald said.

There was silence as everyone thought, and it stretched on. Rayne and Pinkie shuffled uncomfortably from side to side, then Pinkie got up and started skipping all around the room. It was her room, so no one thought of stopping her. Besides, there was no point in interrupting her if motion helped her think. Same for her humming. Humming?

Gerald listened more carefully to Pinkie, and it took him a couple astonished moments before he recognized the tune. He turned to stare at Twila, who was likely the only other pony to have heard that particular song, as sung by the Pinkie from Equestria. Gerald did not have any idea how the human version was doing it again, but that was Pinkie Pie all over:

'Cause all I want's to see you smile, smile, smile. Yes I do!~

Despite some complexity on the surface, understanding the motivations behind some beings, like Discord or Pinkie Pie, was a simple exercise. Pinkie loved to see her friends happy. Take that away, and she could go full-blown insane, as Gearhead, Twilight, and Spike knew. Discord was about what could entertain him in the now, although last Gearhead had heard he was still being at least a little cooperative about the efforts to restore Equestria to the way it was supposed to be. Regardless of whether Discord was worried about pushing his limits and getting in trouble with his new friends, a bored Discord was the most dangerous Discord, as Vines had found out.

The big, fat hint to Pinkie's motivation was in her song. Likewise, the largest interactions the Dazzlings had had with anyone else was through their singing. And as Gerald had noted before...

"The Dazzlings sang most about 'being adored," Twila said. "In other words--"

"Hee-hee! They just want friends!" Pinkie said, bouncing around for joy.

"That can't be it," Jackie said, "not with all the trouble they went to, and all the trouble they caused!"

"If you wanted friends badly enough, what wouldn't you do?" Ro asked.

"Oh my, I don't know," Felicia said.

"I know I'd do anything and everything, because I have!" Pinkie said.

"Including singing," Ro said.

"And being relentless," Rayne said.

"Please call it 'persistence,'"  Pinkie said.

"I liked the hugging best," Felicia said.

"I have to agree with that sentiment," Ro said, and Elle nodded.

"Me too," Twila said.

"I can't exactly disagree with that," Jackie said.

"So, what, we're gonna try to just walk up and hug them?"

"Can you name a faster way to make friends?" Pinkie asked.

"It'll be dangerous if they've armed themselves,"

"I'm also armed, but lets try to make sure it doesn't come to that," Gerald said.

"I don't think everyone should go, in case they run," Twila said.

"Agreed. We'll need strength and endurance," Rayne said. "As a true athlete, I'll go."

"Hey now," Jackie said, "don't go jumping in without me."

"I'd go for the hugging, if I could keep up," Felicia said.

"I wanna go!" Pinkie said.

Twila and Gerald exchanged a glance. "You, Rae, and Pinkie?" She asked.

"Just three?" Jackie asked, disappointed.

"Three-on-three's fair," Rayne said.

"This ain't a game, so we don't need to be 'fair,'"

"No, but we don't want to scare them either," Gerald said.

"Not when we're going to be giving away free hugs!" Pinkie said.

"So that's really going to be our plan?" Rayne asked.

"Are you against it?" Elle asked.

"You kidding? I'm all in!" Rayne whooped.