Clock Is Ticking

Pinkie Pie was not a clueless, airheaded ditz--and she was going to prove it.

"Stupid Rainbow Dash... calling me a ditz... I'll show her! No... can't do that, that would be downright airheaded... Think, Pinkie!"

Pinkie was not used to thinking this hard. Her brain cells were overclocked, and it was making her head hurt. She thought of soaking her head in a nice soothing bucket of iced tea, but then realized what a ditzy thing that would be to do, and cursed herself.

Twilight Sparkle, unluckily, happened to pass Pinkie's way at that moment. If only she could have known what unholy retribution Rainbow Dash's little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon her.

"Twilight! Twilight! You have to answer a question," Pinkie ejaculated. "Am I a clueless, airheaded ditz?"

Twilight was delirious from pain medication. She had just gotten a hoof replacement after her back right had been cracked in a terrible recalibration accident. So the first words out of her mouth were not the most intelligent ones she had ever said.

"Hah. Heh. Pretty much, yeah."

Somewhere in North Korea, a malnourished political prisoner saw what happened to Twilight through his nation's one television, and was like, damn, that girl got it rough.

What happened afterward is a matter of public criminal record. Prison terms in Equestria were what you might call "deterrence-based." Clemency was not common, and this accounted for much of the nation's good behavior.

Suffice it to say Rainbow Dash was right all along. Again. I mean, really, when has Rainbow Dash ever said or done anything wrong? If you don't think Rainbow Dash is the best, fuck you. THE END