A Tiger in Equestria

Oh sometimes I hate myself for even thinking of saying those words. We were now somewhere near Canterlot, it's giant bubble shield making the hard-to-miss city even harder to miss, when the tank, after three days of being perfectly fine, decided that it had had enough and promptly broke down. Because apparently the universe hates me, we had to break down somewhere in the mountains and freezing cold! It's like Russia all over again. I yelled over the snow and winds that universe conjured up just to rub salt in my wounds.

"Gerhard! What's the status on the replacing of the drive housings! I can't stand much of this cold anymore!"

He yelled his reply from somewhere near the engine,

"It's nearly fixed, and we all can't stand this cold! Never knew how the Russians dealt with so much snow!"

"I assume with vodka and lots of coats!"

"Neither of which we have now!"

"Just get the damn tank moving!"

"What do you think I've been doing!" With a few more metallic clanging sounds, the familiar rumble of the engine started up again.

"Alright, let's go!"

The weird convoy slowly began moving along again, snow on the tracks no match for seventy tons of pure German steel and engineering. The ponies, so far haven't ventured out yet, probably due to the sheer coldness outside. As we neared Canterlot, there seemed to be lots of activity, pegasi guards flying around the city, presumably patrolling, while earth ponies and unicorn alike marched down the streets of the city. I wonder if this has anything to do with us? Nah, she wouldn't invite me here, just to insult me by the fact that she doesn't trust me. Alright, my track record isn't exactly the best, having threatened two ponies with a Luger, and a bunch of fillies too. But I'm not going to go on a random rampage through the city.

We had gotten up to the giant bubble shield, and since it included parts of the track I assumed we should just drive right in. We did, and got us a lot of dropped jaws when we pulled up to the station, with the station manager sputtering in confusion at how her locomotive had been replaced by a giant rumbling metal box. I just unhooked the chain, and then proceeded to tell Gerhard to make a beeline for the castle. Not really caring about the literal amounts of confusion that were created by the populace.Besides, we'll leave a long lasting impression on the locals here. Before we could drive our way down to the city, we were stopped by... something that looked like a bat and a pony that combined. Or, a pony and a bat loved each other very much. Okay, now I need bleach to wash that mental image away. Shuddering at the thought of the weird things my imagination comes up with, there were three of these weird hybrids. Probably mares judging from their muzzles, wearing black armor that made them look much more dark. Along with one mare and a stallion normal ponies... With that stupid golden armor again.Although gold is a much more commonplace item here, Gold is definitely not going to protect them from any physical attacks. One of the normal pony guards cleared his throat nervously, the other four sharing his nervousness at the tall sight of us in a tank. We probably towered over them, ponies usually only coming up to my waist when standing, us in a tank meant that we were even higher than them. They kinda look cute when they're nervous. We're not that intimidating right?

"Excuse me sir, by the orders of Princess Celestia, the Solar guard are to accompany you to the palace. Whereas our friends here are from the Lunar guard, assigned by Princess Luna." I decided to have a nice joke with them. They slowly got scared as I didn't respond, and probably fearing that they had insulted me or something, prompting my retaliation. Alright, I'll let you off the hook. They were in near panic states now, probably thinking over some of the worst-case scenarios that could happen.

"Lead the way guards." They all visibly sighed when I finally responded, then suddenly appeared afraid again as they realized that they had done it in front of my face, before quickly surrounding the tank, the leading stallion in front of the tank, occasionally looking back to see that, yes the tank was still rumbling towards him.

We arrived at the palace soon, the leading stallion, who nervously told me his name was Sharp Spear, told us to leave our 'metal beast' in a open area, telling me that it used to be the parking area for guests, but since most ponies arrive by flying chariot or by train, it was rarely used. He and the other Solar guard stood guard next to the tank, while the Lunar guards followed us into the reception. We were greeted by Princess Luna and Princess Celestia, who gave all five of us guest rooms, all across or next to each other. Two Lunar guards stood guard outside two rooms, while one stood guard outside my room. I assumed it was because I was the highest ranked person of the five. Oh the wedding is going to be fun. I went into the bathroom to deal with personal hygiene, the tank itself obviously not having any where to deal with it.