An Everlasting Eternity

IT'S ME!

Why the hell is it me?! I pay my taxes and come to public events. I am even related to the old Excretory Officer for damn sakes. What was I supposed to do, slit the throats of ninety nine sheep and an ox just to show my loyalty?! Damn you, Celestia, and your fucked up morals!!!

But wait. In front of me stands one of her head guards of war. That bitch can never hold power with this kind of friendship on board.

"Geo, listen, can you tell me what that is about?" I asked.

Of course I must act dumb. How else would I preform a task to get such deeply important and well guarded information from-

"It's this paper thing that says you need to go to the doggy named sherbertus. Princess says that you will need to be gone for a while, but will be back soon" he said, looking as if he had not given away such highly important information.

Come on. He should have had at least the slightest bit of knowledge for classification. I didn't even need to play dumb to get this out of him. He didn't even say Cerberus right.

"Sherbertus?"

Shit. That just came out of my mouth. Damn it!

"Yea. I am told he is a doggie underground made of ice cream and candy. He sounds so good. You are lucky to hang out with such a doggie."

Celestia even told him such lies? He isn't dumb, he is downright foal-like.

"Is there any way you could get Celestia to make me not have to go? Please?"

He was quick to respond. "Sorry, but she told me not to fall for your tricks. Your cute face has gotten you out of many things, but she told me 'don't fall for them tricks. She is just parnoid.' I have no idea what parnoid means, but it sounds bad. Celestia even said I would lose everything if I listen."

Great. Now I know Celestia's word is greater than mine. It's flattering that he considers me cute, but there is no way out of this and he can't analyze a sentence well enough to eliminate his need to be here. If I talk about it to anyone, she would probably punish me five times over. I would be seen like that H8_Seed guy, and I don't want that.

"Alright then. When must I leave?"

He thought about it for as bit, then was quick to say it. "They said 'on the marro,' but I don't know what a marro is."

Great. I have but a night to come up with a plan. I have nothing to withstand the strong jaws of a giant dog, so I must work fast. I have to shoo Geo out before I can work with such nothingness.

"Geo, it has been fun, but I need to get ready to play with the 'ice cream dog.' I'll see you later!"

He had no time for a response. I pushed him out the door too fast to attend to audial physics. I now needed to come up with something fast. If I were to run away, I might be hanged. Scourging shops for steel plating may be my best option for survival. Those teeth shouldn't destroy them if he decides to carry me by mouth. I also probably need some lock picks and weaponry in order to escape any dungeons or slay any guards. I also might need some great attire for the whole thing. Maybe a cute yet functional outfi-

NO! Now's not the time for clothing. If I find an outfit while scourging, that would be nice, but the bare necessities are what I need. Now is the time for action. I must do all that I can to survive to see Luna's moon and Celestia's sun aga-

No. Celestia is the villain. I shall never wish to see that bitch again. Now, under the light of Luna, I must go!