Chapters Among the few ponies that had ever visited Fluttershy's cottage, all agreed it was a noisy, uncomfortable place. It always full of animals scurrying one place to another, with their caregiver trying to care for them all without neglecting any. Nopony was surprised that the noise continued, sometimes even at night.
But today the source of noises was totally different. Anypony that looked out of the window would have been surprised to see how the normally quiet pegasus was running from one place to another. She opened a drawer, took out a dress, hesitated and then stored it again. After she went to the mirror and tried different hairstyles, until finally finding one she liked. Then she took food packages from her wicker basket, counted them and left in the basket again.
This happened every single five minutes.
"Oh, Angel, she'll be here in just a moment, do I look fine?"
The little bunny kicked the ground with obvious anger. He never liked when she left him alone in the house to go anywhere, but tonight she hadn't even prepared his dinner. She expected him to prepare it alone! It was totally unfair!
"Yes, I know, it's just a dinner with a friend," Fluttershy said, misinterpreting the gesture. "But we've not been together since we were fillies. If she discovers that I..." she trailed off as she buried her head in the couch cushions, totally embarrased.
Angel didn't hesitate and kicked her head insistently. He knew that if he left her like this, she would take hours to calm down. It would be better if she went to dinner. With some luck, it would end quickly and when she would be back again so he could enjoy an excellent salad of blackberries. The blows, thankfully, had the desired effect. Fluttershy raised her head and breathed deeply a few times, trying to calm down.
Why did Rainbow have to invite her to dinner?
Fluttershy knew the answer. This was beacuse of the Rainbow Falls Traders Exchange. Nothing that Fluttershy said made Rainbow feel less guilty. She still felt horrible for having sold her (in her own words) in exchange for the old book of Daring Do. It was true that she was very hurt by the actions of Rainbow, but she had apologized in public and bought the whistle she wanted, that was enough for her. Back to Ponyville Fluttershy hoped that Rainbow would forgive herself and return to normal. Fluttershy was wrong.
She didn't even remember what she was doing when Rainbow proposed it to her. From that moment Fluttershy just remembered how her heart stopped, how she looked into Rainbow's bright eyes and heard her insistent plea. You shouldn't, you shouldn't , whispered her common sense, but Fluttershy didn't listen. All of her attention was on Dash, and finally said yes. She couldn't resist, whenever Dash asked her something she couldn't refuse. She loved her too much.
It all started in the Young Flyers Camp. She was the only pony that had ever defended her, the only pony who had faced the bullies to end their taunts, the only pony who didn't care if Fluttershy wasn't really good at flying. The race she started for defending her was just the start of their friendship. Sometimes she thought it was a dream. How a cool filly, so admired by everypony, could want to be her friend? But Rainbow was always there when she needed, giving support without judgment.
As they got older, Fluttershy realized what she felt for Dash had slowly transformed into something more than friendship. She had to endure seeing Rainbow's growing interest in going out with colts and how she initiated several engagements. It didn't last long, but Rainbow had the eye of every colt in the Academy and was never single for long time. Meanwhile Fluttershy was content with hiding in the back of the yearbook, writing poems she'll never read her and dreaming that someday Rainbow could be at her side as her fillyfriend.
Then she had to leave Cloudsdale. Before that, it was difficult to stay around Rainbow knowing that the feeling wasn't reciprocated, but the pain of separation and her situation was more than she could resist. She had tried to keep her friend out of her mind, focusing on starting a new life with her aunt and leaving her past behind. She almost succeeded too, but fate has a strange way of playing his cards.
If she hadn't taken the job in Ponyville, she would have never seen Dash again. But Rainbow was there, the first day she came to this town, resting on a cloud. The years had made her much even attractive and cool, if that was possible. And most importantly: she remembered her. That day the tears Fluttershy shed were of pure happiness and she knew she didn't care if Dash never felt the same, all Fluttershy wanted was to be with her, even if it was only as a friend.
KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK
The sharp rap of hooves took her out of her dreams. For a few seconds, old fears came back again, but this time she forced herself to remain calm. She had been with Rainbow Dash thousand times, she could do this, she could have dinner with her alone.
She took a deep breath and opened the door.
KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK
Just in time , thought Twilight as she finished of sealing the letter that she had just written for Princess Celestia. Inside, she detailed the deplorable state of Everfree Castle's library and included a desperate suggestion to arrange a transfer of its books to a better place. The first time she saw it, she couldn't believe that her mentor had left thousands of books behind in those ruins, completely unprotected. What was Celestia thinking? Twilight hadn't had time before, but she felt that as princess should make something, something important and useful for everypony in Equestria. And this was a perfect target.
She smiled as she heard a second batch of knocks on the door, this time more impatient. Hurrying more than usual, Twilight came down the stairs and opened the door with her magic before even stepping on the ground floor. The blue pony entered with an exhalation.
"It's about time!" said Rainbow Dash as missed out the room. "Where is Spike?"
"I gave him the night off, these last few days he has worked very hard and I thought that deserved a break. Quiet," Twilight added, seeing the alarm in Rainbow's eyes, "he left all your stuff before he left. The vegetable paella and for dessert a few cream fritters" she pointed out a wicker basket. "Don't say it to him, but I think this time he had surpassed himself."
Rainbow inspected the contents of basket, thoroughly checking for herself if what Twilight said was true. Just the smell was enough to Dash's stomach come alive and issue an audible roar that made Twilight laugh.
"Great. Are you sure Fluttershy will like it?"
"She said it to me when we went shopping, and I have repeated a thousand times," she said, rolling her eyes, "you don't have to be so nervous.
"Me, nervous? Why should I be?"
That same question was in Twilight's mind since Rainbow asked for help organizing a perfect evening. She partly understood, because the first suggestions that emerged from the pegasus hadn't been very successful, but not so outlandish as justifying extreme anxiety she had from to days. They only had to agree on a couple of points and vöila, the perfect dinner was ready. At first Twilight hesitated, but was increasingly beginning to believe that the interest of Rainbow Dash went beyond trying to make peace with Fluttershy.
"Well, I'm leaving, Fluttershy will already be waiting."
"Rainbow Dash is being punctual? If I didn't know any better I'd say you are taking this as a date," she pointed, kidding at her friend’s expense.
"What?!" Dash's eyes opened wide. "Don't be silly. This is just to apologize, a small party with a friend, nothing like a stupid dates."
"DID SOMEPONY SAY PARTY?"
Both ponies jumped when the most craziest around Ponyville popped out of one of the shelves, made a double somersault and finished his exhibition throwing by shower of confetti.
"Pinkie! What are you doing here?"
"Preparing for the party!" she began bouncing around her friends as she gave an almost unintelligible explanation. "I was in front of the Zecora's house because I was thought we could invite her to our next party because we've never done because she is our friend and because she hadn't had welcome party to Ponyville and then I hear to Dash about a party and I had to come. What are we celebrating?"
Twilight intervened, fearing that if she let Pinkie recover her breath she'd take over a party without having time to object.
"Pinkie! There's not going to be any party!" that was enough for the pony as she stopped and looked at Twilight with huge puppy eyes. "Rainbow only spoke about dinner that was with Fluttershy tonight."
"Woooooo! Is that true? A dinner for two? Like a date? That's amazing!"
"It's not a date!" interjected Rainbow, looking at Twilight angrily. "Did you have to tell her that?"
"I didn't know it was a secret, after all it's just a dinner between friends, right?" Twilight knew that she shouldn't make fun of this, but Dash made it so easy that was inevitable.
"Exactly, just a date... a dinner, a dinner, that's what I meant! Oh, come on!" Rainbow corrected herself while her cheeks turned red. At same time her friends started laughing uncontrollably. "You are the worst friends ever!
With a grunt she took the basket in her mouth and was about to leave when Pinkie Pie grabbed her.
"Wait! Before you go, take this," Pinkie went to the kitchen, and after a series of rumblings that made Twilight fear for the integrity of her crockery, returned with a record-player on her hoof.
"I have record-players stashed all over Ponyville, in case of record-player emergencies. With this, your date will be a success."
"For last time, it's not a date! Bye!" said Rainbow, determined to not lose any more time and going out flying at full speed with her basket and record-player, though she had no intentions of using the latter. Even so, she had time to hear the Pinkie's shrill voice shouting.
"Goooooood luuuuuuck!"
As always, time seemed to freeze when Rainbow Dash appeared on the doorstep. By Celestia, she is so perfect . She never needed ornaments or makeup like other mares, she shone with her own light without any effort. Fluttershy tried to set aside those thoughts. You can do it Fluttershy, you can do it. She strived to smile while tried at same time trying not to tremble.
"Are you ready, Fluttershy? I know that I should have come earlier, but I was occupied," Rainbow took a look at back, a bit annoyed.
"No... no matter. I only have to... pick... a thing," Fluttershy returned to the kitchen, where her basket was waiting to be collected. Oh, I really hope that Rainbow likes . She took a few deep breaths and returned to the door with the courage to look directly to her friend. "I'm ready."
Rainbow Dash's eyes lit up with appetite to see Fluttershy with her own food. "Perfect, I'm starving. Follow me!"
They took flight, catching an updraft and gliding one next to the other. Fluttershy wondered where they would go. For a moment, she imagined herself watching a boxing match or eating in a crowded burger restaurant, options more than reasonable for anypony who knew to Rainbow Dash. Fluttershy grinned to herself. It was impossible that Rainbow had something like that in mind, at least this night. Her friend could be inconsiderate sometimes, but Rainbow knew exactly that she liked or not.
Quietly, they crossed throughout the night sky. The night prepared by the Princess Luna was perfect, not too cold or too warm, with a full moon that shone almost as if it were daylight. Fluttershy was surprised when they left the edges of Ponyville and headed to west, an area that she had never explored. For a moment, Fluttershy felt a twinge of fear at the thought of the dangers that they could found there, but a look from Rainbow was enough to calm her down completely. Dash could be very reckless, but she would never take to her to a really dangerous place.
A few minutes later they went down to the shore of a lake surrounded by strange trees; which were very gnarled, with white bark and cascaded leaves like a weeping willow. A small space that at the light of the moon seemed cozy, quiet and isolated from the outside world. A place where somepony could relax, and be oneself without fear of being judged. Other ponies would be unable to understand, but Fluttershy couldn't have dreamed a better place for a dinner.
"Rainbow, this is... I mean... this place is... beautiful. How did you find it?"
"Twilight told me. She had just gotten her wings, tried a slightly longer trip and crashed here," Rainbow smiled, satisfied with herself by the look of joy on Fluttershy’s face. "I was sure you'd like it."
"I love it," answered Fluttershy sincerely. "But you shouldn’t have bothered, really, since you apologized ..."
"I did! None of our friends would have forgiven me as easily as you did. There is nopony that deserved this more than you."
Before this affirmation, Fluttershy blushed and hid the face behind her mane. In her life, she barely ever got compliments. She didn't really expect one. She didn't have anything that made her special, she was a normal pony, mostly mediocre. As much as her friends insisted, sometimes Fluttershy thought that their words were nothing more than an attempt to make her feel good. But a compliment of Rainbow was a totally different thing; had to be something very impressive for her to admit it. And because one kind word she said was worth a thousand times more than of other ponies.
Then Dash's stomach gave a loud roar. Now it was Rainbow's turn to be ashamed as Fluttershy laughed very softly. The tension that had been building since she went out of home was completely dissipated and Fluttershy now was quite, able to dine with Rainbow as if they weren't alone. It was just Dash, her best friend, with the same insatiable appetite that made Fluttershy laugh when they were fillies.
"Yeah... it will be better we once start to eat," said Rainbow quickly, trying to deflect attention. "What have you brought?"
"Er... some salad and two apple pies. And you?"
"You'll know in a moment, just let me prepare it everything. I can't let my best friend sit on ground, don't you think?" she pointed with a smile as she worked with the speed that characterized her. Moments later, she had prepared a magnificent evening picnic, with extra illumination from a few strategically placed candles. Sitting opposite each other, Rainbow began to serve the food.
Another surprise. Paella? Since when did Dash know about that kind of food? Fluttershy took a small bite of her portion and her eyes widened. She always was a good cook, but living alone and having to take care of all of her animals gradually motivated her to learn more about cooking; something she was very proud of. But the food in front of her exceeded her expectations. Everything was in the right proportion, forming a harmony of flavors.
"You did this?" she asked, really impressed.
Rainbow Dash was starting her second plate of food, eating like a herd of dragons would steal it. With some effort she managed to swallow a part and answered to Fluttershy with all the elegance as she could while her cheeks seemed to want explode.
"If I had done it, my house would be in flames. You know that the kitchen and I have never gotten along," said Rainbow waving her hoof in disdain. "Spike did all of this. That greedy little dwarf charged me two rubies for all this, can you believe it?" she remarked angrily waving wings, making Fluttershy smile. "You want some wine?"
"Yes, please."
The only alcoholic beverage she drank with some regularity was Apple Family cider and only in small amounts; however after Dash just said, she was more than ready for a drink or two. The nerves had returned with more force and with reason too. Fluttershy couldn't believe that Rainbow had asked for help. She never asked for help! Rainbow was too proud and independent to admit her limitations unless there wasn't any other choice. First Twilight and now Spike. All this just to organize an apology.
Or was there something more? A faint flame of hope was born in the heart of Fluttershy. She didn't dare to believe it; it was too wonderful, too unreal. They were only friends, good friends. The idea of Rainbow Dash, the most amazing pegasus in Equestria, could feel something special for her was just a childhood dream. She couldn't let her thoughts wander in that direction, it was madness.
Rainbow started talking and Fluttershy was relieved to have an excuse to get away from her thoughts. Quickly the conversation turned to the major concern of Rainbow these days, the Equestria Games, which began in just a week. As expected, Rainbow spoke most of the time and Fluttershy just intervened to ask a question or give a reason, but this didn't bother her. Years with Rainbow had infected her taste for sports and the truth is that she was also somewhat excited about the chances to win a medal for Ponyville in the relay race, so Fluttershy listened with interest even though every now and then disconnected her mind.
"... and therefore the chances of Phillydelphia to take the gold are low. Don't you think, Fluttershy?"
"Ehhh ... I guess," Fluttershy reviewed the last thing she heard, trying to answer something meaningful, but the face of her friend denoted that she had already realized what was happening. Fluttershy looked away, embarrassed for not having paid more attention, but then noticed the touch of Rainbow's hoof on her shoulder.
"I'm sorry," the guilt was evident on the face of Rainbow Dash. "It's supposed be a dinner for you and I take an hour talking about me and the Games. You should have stopped me before."
"No, it's okay..." Fluttershy said insistently, well aware that Rainbow was touching contact with her. She tried to say more, trying not to be distracted by the beautiful, regretful crimson eyes. "I was having a good time, I swear. I was just distracted. All this... all of this dinner was great. I wouldn't want be anywhere else than here with you."
Only seconds after Fluttershy realized what she had said and her cheeks returned to flushing with such intensity that she wouldn't have been surprised her ears started smoking. She closed her eyes tightly. What she said was virtually a declaration of his feelings, nothing less than to the mare she loved.
In the privacy of her home she had tried countless times; she stood facing the mirror, imagining Rainbow Dash's face reflected instead of hers and she told everything to her. But even when she is alone her voice locked and her body trembled like a newborn foal. In her worst moments, when she felt more depressed, even imagined Rainbow mocking her. There was no way that someday Fluttershy could deal with their fears and confess her true feelings.
Until that night.
Fluttershy almost didn't dare to breathe, much less to open her eyes. She couldn't remember when her heart had beat so strong; even when they had to face the dragon to save Ponyville from a one hundred years smoke cloud. The next thing that Rainbow said would change everything, for better or worse. But she didn't expect to hear a laugh, a laugh so intense that made her open her eyes. Rainbow Dash had fallen back and clutched her chest while trying not burst out laughing, unaware of Fluttershy's bewildered look.
Seconds later, calmer, Rainbow could finally speak. "Fluttershy, silly, you're always so kind. You've to learn to be more assertive, really, you can't go saying yes to everything," with a jump, Rainbow got up of the ground. "So you wouldn't want to be with another pony, eh?" she said in an exaggerated joking tone. "And who wouldn't? It's me we're talking about, Rainbow Dash," she stood on two legs and inflated her chest, acquiring a proud pose. "A living legend, the coolest pony that has ever existed."
Without being able to avoid it, Fluttershy began to laugh. In part because Dash was being very funny and for other part because she was relieved that her friend hadn't taken her seriously. A small part of Fluttershy would have wanted to hear a response from Rainbow, but she wasn't sure she could handle a direct negative. It was a cowardly option, she knew, but she was accustomed to keep her feelings in secret, at least with that could keep her hopes up. While she would have to Rainbow beside her, everything else didn't matter.
"That's my Fluttershy," affirmed Rainbow, glad to make her friend laugh. "From now on nothing more from me, tonight is yours and only yours. Ok?"
"Ok. Well, you know, if that's fine with you."
"It's perfect. But before I still have to give you one last surprise. Do you think you can wait a little more?" requested Rainbow while looked at night sky. "I know you normally don't go to sleep so late, but this is special, trust me."
Fluttershy couldn't imagine that Rainbow could have more tricks on her sleeve, but she nodded, intrigued. Indeed, it was truth that she was beginning to feel a little tired, but the whole evening was so nice that she could stay up all night if it was necessary.
Desserts were finished and after some other unimportant talk, the two ponies were satisfied with their stomachs full. With a yawn, Rainbow Dash lay face up and watched at night sky. Fluttershy imitated her, wondering to herself when Rainbow would show that special surprise. However, she soon found herself spellbound watching the night sky, wrapped in the silence and tranquility of the forest. It was not the first time she did it; in his cottage she often found lying on the roof to admire the sky, especially if Princess Luna had prepared a show like comets or other stuff. Compared with the enormity of the sky all her problems seemed small and distant.
Now she turned her head to see Rainbow and was surprised to see that her friend seemed worried. Touching her flank to get her attention, Fluttershy stepped closer to her and asked.
"Rainbow, is everything alright? You seemed a little unhappy."
"Don't worry," replied Rainbow with a reassuring smile, though she still seemed restless, "it's just that tonight ... well, brought me some memories of long ago."
Taking Dash's hoof with her, Fluttershy smiled back. She didn't understand what saddened to her friend, but she knew how she could cheer her up. Pressuring her wasn't going to work, Fluttershy knew the only way that Rainbow would open up was leaving that decision for herself. Fluttershy simply stood still, just wanted that Rainbow know she was there, with her, no matter what was the problem.
Finally, the wait was successful. The following words were barely a whisper, but perfectly audible. "Can I ask you a question, Fluttershy?"
"You know that yes, Rainbow."
"Why did you leave of Cloudsdale? You knew I had gone on a one-week trip with my father and when I returned you had just left a letter in my mailbox saying that you had left with your aunt and you would not come back to town. You didn't give any further explanation. I tried to investigate, but I just knew that something had happened at your house, that the Royal Guard had been there and you were taken to a hospital, but nopony knew more details. I was so worried about you. I thought you would send me letters, that we would continue to keep in contact. They never came. We never came back to talk. I want to know what happened."
Several years had passed, but Fluttershy's heart hadn't forgotten the pain. Even now, a long time later, she couldn't forget that feeling of choking, of fear, of uncertainty. Tears formed at the edge of her eyes as she struggled desperately to stand firm and answer the question.
"My father committed suicide."
The phrase left Rainbow in shock. For a moment she tried to convince herself that she had heard wrong, that something like that could only be a bad trick of her mind. However, Fluttershy kept talking and her words didn't leave space for doubt.
"Actually, I don't remember well, just fragments. But I remember that my father never came to be the same since my mother's death. When she was alive it was different. She mades us optimistic even when we went to see her at the hospital and she was skin and bones. After the funeral my father couldn't stand it and he began to drink. When he wasn't working was the only thing that relieved him. A year later he... had a knife, I tried to stop him... but he pushed me and I fell down the stairs... when I woke up..."
Fluttershy's voice broke as she suddenly she found herself between Dash's forelegs and wings, who wrapped her in a warm embrace. "That's alright, Fluttershy. You don't have to say anymore," said Rainbow, kissing her forehead, cursing herself for asking.
It was the signal that Fluttershy's body was waiting. With a muffled groan Fluttershy began to cry in silence, sharing the pain she had hidden for so many years from everypony. Rainbow kept hugged her throughout the process, and felt her injuries like if they were own. One after another, the tears fell until finally —after what seemed like hours— disappeared and the penalty was petering out.
Gradually, Fluttershy began to breathe more relaxed, but still remained embracing Dash. As close as they were, she could feel the quiet beating of her heart and each taking deep breaths. Even the smell. She blushed a little, realizing she had gone so long without establishing such an intimate contact with anypony. She rose her head slightly for giving thanks and immediately her gaze was drawn to what was happening in the clearing.
"Rainbow, look at that." she pointed with his foreleg.
The pegasus' head rose and smiled to see what Fluttershy was pointing at. In the branches of the trees white flowers slowly began to bloom that were very similar to orchids, but with one important difference. Their petals gave off a golden glow and there were so many of them that they illuminated the glade as if it were a stage.
"They are Night Fairies," explained Rainbow. "They bloom at midnight during the full moon and attract fireflies. At least that's what Twilight told me," she clarified, fearing that she sounded too much like an egghead. "Look, there they are!"
This had to be the surprise that Dash spoke about before. Fluttershy got up and approached, wiping the remains of the tears she had. Both ponies admired the wonderful natural spectacle they had before their eyes. Distracted, they neither realized that the foreleg of a pink pony reach out from under the tablecloth and turned on the record-player before disappearing in a hurry. Fluttershy did a little jump when the music caught her by surprise, while Rainbow Dash examined the place, puzzled.
"But what ...?" Dash had recognized the song instantly, it was one of her favorite groups. "Give me a second to turn that off."
"Dance with me," Fluttershy said suddenly.
"What?!"
"Dance with me," repeated Fluttershy, full of a strange courage. Perhaps what just happened or more likely the wine she had drunk had taken effect, but her habitual shyness had disappeared. "You said tonight was mine, remember? And this is one of my favorite songs."
Rainbow blinked in surprise. Since when did Fluttershy listen Skillet? "But it's not music to dance together... "she shut up, seeing the determined look on her friend. Of course, it happens to me for saying that she should be more assertive. "Ah, I guess it doesn't matter."
They joined their hooves and were carried away by the rhythm of the music, improvising a dance that doesn't quite fit, but they likewise enjoyed. Circling, they continued dancing even when the record-player finished.
Author's Note
Fluttershy is orphan by fault of Disney, they traumatized me, so many main characters with his parents dead...
Floating, that was the right word. Fluttershy was floating in happiness like one of Pinkie Pie’s balloons, even with all four feet on the ground. An absolute calm reigned within her, and she didn’t care about what was happening around her. Except Rainbow Dash. Although she had had all night to admire her, Fluttershy never tired of seeing her eyes, her untidy hair, nor her athletic and muscular body. She was so distracted, she took a moment to realize they were back in her cottage. By the look of Rainbow, it seemed like time to say goodbye.
“I‘ve had a great time,” said Fluttershy, reluctant.
“Yeah, it was fun. I’ll see ya again sometime,” agreed Rainbow, smiling. “Well, bye.”
With nothing more to add, Rainbow began to turn back, but then noticed how Fluttershy pulled her tail, retaining her.
“Rainbow, I ...”
“What’s up?”
Honestly? She didn’t know what she was doing. She wanted to tell Rainbow that she didn’t want her to leave. And not just tonight. Rainbow was so kind, so caring, so understanding... Fluttershy wanted to know if there was anything else. If her suspicions were true. Her throat refused to issue any sound, so she gave a step forward. And then another. Dash's eyes fixed on her, and she felt a warmth grow inside that gave her courage. Only a few steps separated both. She stopped to think, closed her eyes.
Then she kissed Rainbow.
It was not the kiss she thought an adult pony’s would be, more like the kiss of a filly, who just fell in love for the first time. Her first kiss. Shy, insecure, but so sincere that it made up for inexperience. It was barely a touch, but it was enough to make the Fluttershy’s heart beat wildly and her body trembled from head to hooves.
She was about to fall back, embarrassed, when Dash's lips pushed against her. This contact was stronger, firmer, allowing Fluttershy to taste the flavour of Rainbow’s lips. It left her stunned; she didn’t dare to move, and risk doing something wrong, but before she could think or try something, the moment ended abruptly.
Fluttershy blinked to see her friend jump back with wide eyes, and an expressive mixture of confusion and surprise.
“Fluttershy!” Rainbow said, dazed. “You're a lesbian?”
“I ... I mean ... I guess so.”
Rainbow shook her head and blowed air from her muzzle. “Okay, it doesn’t matter. You drank, I drank, it has only been a mistake, we forget this and no big problem.”
“Rainbow... but I had to tell you ... I lov...”
“Don’t you say that!” she pushed Fluttershy back “You don’t dare to say that. Don’t you see? It could ruin everything. What about our friendship, doesn't it matter you?
“But you kissed me... and the dinner...” Fluttershy’s hesitated, and shrank with fear.
“I’ve not kissed you!” Rainbow denied, pawing the ground with strength, causing Fluttershy to back off. “That's your imagination, you're... confused. I’ve not kissed you. It hasn’t happened, or ever will. Did you think that this dinner was something else? Well, forget it. I would never go out with you.”
I would never go out with you.
Fluttershy had endured many taunts before, but they were never as bad as this. Even worse, because those words came from Rainbow. The sense of bliss she felt a moment ago had vanished completely, leaving only a sharp pain in her heart. Fluttershy wanted beg to Rainbow, apologize, but she didn’t dare to look into those eyes full of fury. She hates me. She hates me and I deserve it. I shouldn’t have kissed her. She's right, I ruined our friendship.
It was too many emotions for one night, and Fluttershy couldn’t stand any more. She ran to her house, passed in a flash and went upstairs to finally throw herself on her bed and hid under the blanket. She didn’t have time to mourn or whine. Seconds were enough before the exhausted pegasus fell asleep. Her body knew better, that above all else she needed rest now.
A tree outside shuddered, receiving a strong kick. Then another, and more and more until rain of blows caused the tree splintering from the force. But Rainbow didn't stop. Just when their hooves were bloodstained and too sore to continue she did. She dropped to the ground and wiped her tears. Only then, she looked at cottage and whispered.
“I’m so sorry, Fluttershy. I'm so sorry.”
The cloudy sky and wind gusts threatened to storm on the morrow, though the climate team hadn’t announced anything. Twilight didn’t care it; she had planned this day long ago and she only had in mind read a couple of volumes, safe in her library. But now she was in the streets, trotting towards Rarity’s boutique to return a novel she had given her a few days ago. She liked the novel so much that Twilight wanted to ask to Rarity if she had more from the same writer.
Arriving at Carousel Boutique, Twilight hit a few times the door and waited. Before two seconds passed, the door opened, Rarity quickly hurrying out with an expression of relief.
“I was already worried dear...” she paused. “Ah, Twilight. My apologies, I thought you were somebody else.”
“Hi Rarity, I have come to bring the book you left me,” Twilight said as she levitated it from her saddlebag. “Did you expect any customers?”
“No, not exactly.” Rarity took the book with her own magic and invited pass to Twilight. “I had met with Fluttershy a while back. She provided my past model designs.” she pointed three mannequins to the end of the room, each one with a different dress. “Divine, don’t you think?” she added with a smile that barely lasted. “But it’s been an hour and she has not arrived yet.”
Immediately a voice of alarm jumped in the head of Twilight. It’s very strange. Fluttershy wouldn’t miss an appointment without grounds and Twilight’s analytical mind couldn’t avoid thinking it was something related with her plans of the past night. Had something happened at dinner?
“Do you know anything about Fluttershy? Have you seen her?” Rarity asked with some concern, who seemed to have realized Twilight’s thoughts.
“It's nothing,” Twilight said, playing it down. “Simply, I just remember that yesterday she and Rainbow Dash were going for dinner. Because of what happened at the Fair Exchange, Rainbow wanted to apologize,” she clarified, realizing Rarity's thoughts. “Maybe they finished late and Fluttershy is sleeping still? Or she simply forgot your appointment,” she suggested, not convinced.
The two mares looked at each other, hesitant.
“Perhaps... she did. Better go to see her.” Twilight pointed out. “Just in case.”
Rarity nodded and after ensuring that her sister was perfectly safe, she closed the boutique and they marched together towards Fluttershy's cottage. Upon arrival they noticed that something was wrong; one of the trees in the road had been viciously beaten and was half-broken. Moreover, a considerable group of animals surrounded the cottage, and they seemed nervous.
The two mares moved on, working their way up to the door. A slight push showed that it wasn’t locked. They quickly entered, accompanied by several animals that slipped through her legs. There seemed to be nothing different or of concern, excluding the ground floor, was deserted and devoid of any life aside from the creatures that had entered.
“Fluttershy?” Rarity called out. When she didn’t receive answer, she tried again. “Fluttershy, darling, are you there?”
“Let's go upstairs,” Twilight said. She didn’t feel comfortable invading Fluttershy's house, but she was getting really worried and Rarity’s look told her that the feeling was mutual.
A few seconds after, they found themselves in the master bedroom. Fluttershy was there, wrapped in her blanket, while Angel was shaking her insistently. For a minute both mares feared the worst, but to approach to the bed they could see how her friend's chest rose and fell with an even pace. They were relieved, laughing for being so frightened.
"We should wake her up," Rarity suggested.
Twilight went to bed and shaked Fluttershy. She was so sleepy that it took a great effort to wake her. Feeling attacked, she cried out in fear until she realized who was in. “Rarity, Twilight ... what are you doing here?”
“We were worried about you, Fluttershy,” said Twilight. “Rarity was waited you for an hour and as you didn’t show up, we decided to come see you, to see if everything is okay.”
“An hour?” Fluttershy looked at the bedside clock and she blinked her eyes with surprise. “I'm sorry, I didn’t want...!” then she realized that Angel hit her foreleg, impatient. “The animals! Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, oh my gosh!” she went out running to the living room without missing time.
Her friends followed her. The animals received Fluttershy with great enthusiasm as she began to prepare food for everyone. Without thinking twice, Twilight came to help her busy friend. Rarity followed, but with much less enthusiasm and trying to stay as far away as possible from certain "undesirable critters". Fluttershy gave them a grateful look.
The animals were quite eager for breakfast and kept the three ponies busy, but Twilight couldn’t avoid notice that something was wrong on Fluttershy. Normally her friend would be happy, humming a song, caressing and talking to the animals. Today she had a dull look and didn’t smile at all.
“Rarity, have you noticed?” Twilight whispered to her friend.
“Did you say something, darling?” she said as she fed a skunk with a look of barely concealed disgust.
“Look at Fluttershy. Normally she loves to take care of their animals, but today she doesn’t seem herself. I think something bad happened last night."
“Poor Fluttershy. Should we ask her?"
“We'd better finish to help her, then we find out what happened.” Twilight said, receiving Rarity’s approval.
Finally, all the animals were fed and groomed at the cost of requiring all morning. Just after midday, the three mares could relax and unwind. Rarity offered to prepare lunch, to Twilight's delight. During the meal Fluttershy seemed quite normal, but she couldn’t deceive her two friends. Rarity glanced at Twilight and whispered her. "I'll take over this". She hesitated, but finally decided to be direct.
“Darling, Twilight told me that yesterday Rainbow prepared dinner for you. Did you have a good time?
Fluttershy's reaction was instantaneous; she shuddered and hid her face completely before the mane. ”Please,” she whispered with trembling voice. “I don’t want to talk about it.”
“I'm sorry,” Rarity said quickly. “You don’t have to tell us anything, of course. It's just that we don’t like seeing you sad, if we can do something to help...” she let the offer in the air, not daring to push.
Fluttershy nodded, but she said nothing more. The rest of the meal passed in awkward silence, except for some attempts of conversation that didn’t go ahead. Then, when they were about to leave, Fluttershy spoke again.
“The dinner was fine... we talked... we danced... and then...”
At first, the words of Fluttershy were fairly inconsistent, but with patience and support Rarity had gotten that she confessed everything about dinner, her secret love for Dash, and her departure from Cloudsdale. Now that she was rid of that weight and she was able to share her feelings with her friends, Fluttershy was a little better. Rarity and Twilight left the house soon after, promising to see her the next day.
After a while, Rarity was the first to speak, outraged. “How could Rainbow Dash do that? She has always been a scoundrel, but I never imagined her able to do something so horrible.”
Twilight took a moment to respond. There was a part of it that puzzled her; for a moment Rainbow had kissed to Fluttershy, but then she denied it with such zeal that made to Fluttershy hesitate. “I can’t believe it either. There must be a rational explanation for all this and I have to find it.” she waved her wings. “I’ll make a visit to Rainbow and I’ll discover what happened.”
“Good luck, I’d accompany you, but I've left Sweetie Belle alone too long. I hope she hadn’t touched any of my new fabrics,” she said nervously, biting her hoof.
“Easy, I’m sure all is right. See you later.”
Twilight took flight and quickly reached the level of the clouds. His first thought was to visit the climate team; Rainbow Dash was usually working at this time. She didn’t take long to find them, flying north of Ponyville. The foreman, Thunder, a bushy mustache veteran pegasus, ran the placement of several clouds when he noticed the presence of Twilight and went to meet her.
“Good morning Princess Twilight, what brings you here?”
“Good morning Thunder. I'm looking for Rainbow Dash, I want to talk with her.
“I want as well!” replied with energy. “She has been gone all day, and today we have much work to do. If you see her, tell her that I hope to see her here tomorrow with a good explanation. She is a good worker and I'd not like to fire her.”
“Okay, as soon as I see her, I’ll say that. Bye.”
She continued flying, but this time she took course towards the house of Dash. Fluttershy had reason to be concerned and neglecting their duties, but again Rainbow’s attitude didn’t make sense. She didn’t doubt that at this stage Rainbow would be feeling a little guilty at least, but Twilight doubted her remorse would have prevented go to work. She was who had rejected Fluttershy, not reversed.
Lost in her thoughts, Twilight almost crashed into the Rainbow’s house. Going back a bit, she landed in the cloud and hit the door, initially soft and then harder.
“Rainbow, I know you're home, open the door!”
Twilight hope, but no one answered. She wasn’t sure how to proceed. She could easily break through with her magic, but she wouldn’t destroy Rainbow’s house. If I was not a pegasus, it would be as simple as through a wall... but of course, then I couldn’t have flown here. Luckily, her problems were solved when the door opened, though it was not Rainbow who was behind, but Tank, her pet. The turtle looked with concern and pointed toward the bedroom.
“Thanks Tank, I owe you one.” she stroked the head of the tortoise with care.
Uncomfortable, Twilight went to the bedroom, not knowing how Rainbow would react. She found her lying in bed, her back to the door. Rainbow could simply be sleeping, but then she said with irritated voice.
“A closed door doesn't mean anything to you? What do you want?”
"I'm sorry about that, but I need talk to you.” she heard Rainbow growl from the bed “I won’t leave until we talk,” she insisted.
“What are you my father now? Well, let's finish this.”
Rainbow turned to Twilight with some difficulty, panting. Twilight’s eyes widened when she realized that Dash front hooves were wrapped in bandages.
“What did you happened? Are you okay?”
“Just a minor accident,” snapped Rainbow. “But I don't want to talk about it. Why are you here?
Twilight felt a twinge of anger at the attitude of Dash, but stopped herself. She hadn’t come to pick fights, but answers. And she had already at least once. It wasn’t difficult to put two and two together to realize the connection between Rainbow’s wounds and the half-broken tree. Now it was time to figure out the rest.
“I've been in Fluttershy’s home this morning,” she began, trying to be impartial. She told me what happened last night. I can understand you don’t feel anything for her, but you could have been more subtle with your rejection, don’t you think? Fluttershy is very sensitive, as you know.
“And since when is what happens between Fluttershy and me your business?”
“Since both of you are my friends,” pointed Twilight. “Fluttershy is having a hard time, you know? You could apologize at least for how you behaved last night, trying to cheer her up... and tell her that your friendship is not in danger.
Rainbow ducked her head and looked away from Twilight, which she interpreted as a gesture of regret. However, her next words left her frozen.
“I can’t do that.”
“Excuse me?”
“I can’t. It’s the best for her,” she said, biting her lip.
Twilight couldn’t believe what he was hearing, she refused to believe it, those words couldn’t come out of Element of Loyalty’s mouth. “The best thing for her is that she thought you hate her? Because that's what she thinks right now, Rainbow. You can’t turn your back just when she most needs you. This morning she didn’t seem herself, she has been crying and...”
“I already know it!” Dash's cry echoed off the walls of the room. She raised his head, revealing Twilight her eyes filled with tears. “I already know. But she shall not love me. She shall forget me, no matter how hard it is.”
Twilight's mind was about to explode. All this makes no sense. Why Rainbow...? And then the truth appeared before her as a revelation. Dash’s nerves for dinner, her efforts for everything were perfect, the kiss that she denied having given, her tears to confirm that Fluttershy was suffered. Everything could be summed up in one simple sentence.
“You love Fluttershy too.”
“It doesn’t matter,” Rainbow replied, shaking her head.
“Of course it matters, it’s the only thing that matters! Twilight insisted, excited. “Go hug her and tell her how you really feel!”
“You don’t tell me what I have to do.” she sighed in exasperation as the tears. “Real life isn’t like your romance novels Twilight, it isn’t so easy. We can’t be together.”
“That doesn’t make any sense! Explain to me what happens.”
“You wouldn’t understand.”
Twilight wasn’t willing to give up so easily. “Why wouldn't I? Just tell me, I'm sure we can find a solution.”
Do you think that you are an expert in matters of love!?” Rainbow exploded. “Don’t make me laugh! Until a year ago you had no friends, you didn’t know what friendship meant, yeah, sure you understand what love is.” she said, sarcastic. “Return to your library, egghead.”
Tired of arguing, Rainbow turned around and ignored Twilight, waiting she go out and leave her alone. But Twilight didn’t move. Rainbow was already thinking throw directly when heard to her.
“You're an idiot, Rainbow Dash. You have the pony that you love just in your side and you leave, you might’ve been happy with her. I have to conform with a reminder of Flash...
Flash? Who is Flash? Rainbow was going to ask when a memory came to mind. A few months ago, in the Crystal Empire castle, when Twilight had gone in search of the unicorn called Sunset Shimmer. When she came back from that other world, she spoke some about such Flash Sentry.
“Although I’m an idiot too.” Twilight continued after taking a breath. “He isn’t even of our species. And my simple presence in its world could alter irreversibly, as would happen if he would come to Equestria.” she laughed full of bitterness. “And even if not, we could meet only each thirty moons. That’s no way we could have a relationship... and yet I can’t forget him. Did you say I know nothing about love, Rainbow?” she remarked in a hard tone. “I’d wish you were right. Everything would be easier if I didn’t dream with an impossible relationship.”
Rainbow didn’t know that answer. Twilight’s sudden confession had left her stunned. And she was not even angry.
“Do what you want Rainbow. For my part I won’t tell to Fluttershy any. But keep in mind this; you can choose. Others don’t have a choice.
After that she left, leaving Rainbow alone with her thoughts.
Author's Note
I hope you liked this chapter. Comments and constructive criticism are appreciated.
Rainbow stared at her opponent's black eyes, challenging him quietly. She didn’t care he was four times taller than her or the power aura that he emitted. Rainbow's eyes followed Tirek's every move, her body was ready for jumping when he would have any minimal intention to attack. By the corner of her eye, she saw her friends; imprisoned in the cage, powerless, too weak to escape after they lost their magic. Rainbow was the only one that stood up.
"Arg, stop to fight and join with your friends, damn blue mare."
"My name is Rainbow Dash, stupid," she grunted in response. "Prepare yourself, I'm going to kick your ass until you get back sobbing to Tartarus."
Her hooves raised dust to air as she initiated a rush toward her enemy. Rainbow had seen how he absorbed the friends's magic and she didn't let to do the same with her. Her feints were enough to dodge magic beams that passed to centimeters of her, which exploded to impact with the ground. Time to take off. Her wings opened totally, and with two flutters, Rainbow soared the sky and put herself meters beyond land. This was her element, her best weapon, while she could fly it was impossible for the monster to defeat her. She accelerated, avoiding more beams.
"Ha! Maybe you’re fast, but not faster than me."
So fast that got out of Tirek's sight, Rainbow started the first attack, trying to cause the most possible damage. Three blows in head, chest and knees made Tirek roar, who tried to catch her without success. Near immediately, he received another two, which he couldn't react to fast enough. Overcome that. She didn't hold back any time, giving blows that would have crushed the skull of anypony and enjoying of frustration roars that issued monster's mouth. But in spite of that, her blows didn't seem having any effect. Dammit! Is his skin steel or what?
"That is all?" Tirek began to laugh. "After many threats I waited something better."
"Shut up, I just started!"
I'm going to finish you, here and now. With that single-mindedness she flew away, so far away that Tirek became a small point in the land. I must use all I have against him if I want to win. A fear twinge invaded her before what she planned to do, but the reminder of her imprisoned friends reinforce her. I don't think to fail you, whatever the cost.
She grit her teeth and plummeted, leaving her body cut through the air like a bolt. She flapped her wings again for giving herself more impulse. The ground was far away, but Tirek's beams still came, forcing her to restrain herself to dodge them. She felt the resistance formed before her, one that started to know too good. Focus Dash, only a last impulse. Feeling like if she broke in two parts, with the last wings flutter she got her reward; the barrier was snapped as she shot out to more velocity that any other living pony would have known.
The impact sound was as strong as the Sonic Rainboom's sound. Rainbow noticed how her hooves crushed Tirek's skull before he blew away, unable to support the kick, as she had planned. Immediately after she felt as her own bones smashed to pieces, then a brutal impact against the ground. She bounced repeatedly, for finally fell in dust, unconscious.
When Rainbow awoke she regretted what had been done. At first she wasn't even able to locate the pain, just knowing her whole body felt as if she were being pierced with red-hot needles. If Rainbow could, she would have opened her mouth to scream, but she was so exhausted and dazed that she couldn't find focus. Or maybe she was, but couldn’t hear it. She couldn't open her eyes neither. Her entire world had been reduced to a sphere of darkness and pain.
She tried to concentrate and breathe easy, ignoring pain points. She was used to suffering many accidents during training, she got hits in areas that other ponies didn't even know, but never had injuries like that. Gradually everything became more clear in her mind. Her chest burned with every breath. Somepony hit me if I don’t get several broken ribs. She was sure her legs too, and her head's twinges confirmed at least a crack in her skull. But the wings were good, she could still move and feel them. She outlined a smile of victory.
She opened his eyes, but closed them almost instantly. The world seemed a kaleidoscope of shapes and colors that stunned her. Bit by bit, she reopened them, trying to focus images that appeared in front of her. Her other senses also seemed to start working again. Sweet Celestia, hasn't been so bad. Rainbow Dash one Tirek zero.
And then the ground rumbled, something huge was coming toward her. Her heart froze. It's impossible. It was approached from behind, she couldn't see, but there was no doubt what it was. I hit him with my Sonic Rainboom, he can't be unharmed! I hit him in head, for Celestia's love! Rainbow tried to move, got away somehow, but with her wounds there was nothing she could do. Tirek's hand wrapped her completely and was raised like a doll, staying at the height of his face.
"A very nice colors show. It's a shame it's nothing more than that., I almost had fun, but finally, all the ponies are equal. Garbage. And now..." Tirek licked his lips, savouring the victory.
No. Rainbow knew what was going to happen. She flapped in desperation, didn't matter pain bursts, trying to escape of magic that imprisoned her. But she could do nothing against the Tirek’s power. He sucked her body's magic as easily as a foal took a smoothie. He took his time, savoring every drop of energy as he drained Dash's body.
Rainbow strived to contain the tears. It was painful, but more than that was humiliating. She could feel him snatch a vital part of herself, something as essential as one of her extremities, and the worst was Tirek didn't care. Her wings became a dead weight on her back, her Cutie Mark disappeared. Each and every one of her dreams were lost. She couldn’t be a Wonderbolt. She couldn't fly again. Never.
She felt Tirek toss her into the cage with the rest of her friends, but she didn't care. Nothing mattered anymore.
Unannounced, she felt a hoof stroked soft on her back. Rainbow turned to see Fluttershy, smiling. Dash couldn't avoid smile in return. Despite her distress, Fluttershy's caresses relieved her, contact with her skin and fragrance of wildflowers were enough to take away temporarily her pain. Fluttershy was at her side and that was enough to compensate. She wasn't alone. She had to be strong. For her friends, for Fluttershy. They got ahead.
"Are you okay, Fluttershy?"
Fluttershy's smile became a mask of pain. “How could I be good, Rainbow? I gave you my heart and you yelled me, you humiliated me, you made me cry." she stepped back, breaking the contact with Dash.
"Fluttershy, I..." Rainbow extended her foreleg, not knowing she could say, ‘sorry’ was not enough. Really, nothing was enough.
"Oh, shut up," replied Applejack's voice. "Now she has a pony who really loves her, isn’t that true, sugarcube?
Dash's astonishment was huge when she saw Applejack and Fluttershy embraced, as their muzzles got together with tenderness and shared a warm kiss. When they finished, Fluttershy left her head resting on the Applejack's shoulder, showed a bliss expression.
"Yes, Dash, I won this competition," she said proudly, laughing at surprise expression that still had her friend's face. "I’m much better partner for her than ya, don't believe girls?
"Absolutely," Rarity answered. "It's just wonderful you're going out, you're the perfect couple."
"Of course, they fit better than a pair of raspberry cakes coated with hot chocolate and then with candy chips. They are great and delicious!" Pinkie Pie rubbed her hooves while a drool trickle escaped out of mouth's corner. Suddenly her mane spiked and her eyes widened in surprise. "Ohhhh! My Pinkie sense tells me that soon there will be a wedding! Right there!"
They were at Sweet Apple Acres and Pinkie Pie indicated precisely the barn, which was decorated as the occasion demanded. Rainbow realized the rest of her friends were outside the cage, but she was still inside. She didn't understand what was happening or how they had gotten there. She looked at Fluttershy, waiting for an explanation, but Fluttershy avoided her gaze. All her friends did. Just Applejack gave her a last contempt sight.
"You're not invited, of course, none of us want be near you after what you did to Fluttershy. Real friends don't do that. I waited not see you again, Rainbow Crash."
"Wait! Don't leave me here alone. Come back!"
It was useless. They moved away more and more while laughed happily. Rainbow closed her eyes, unable to bear it any longer, taking refuge in cozy darkness. The guilt and pain embargoed her. There was nothing more for her, she had lost everything today. Their wings, her friends and Fluttershy, all gone in an instant. All by her fault.
"I think would be better get this over."
The voice surprised to Rainbow, she rise her head up, trying to locate its source. The cage was gone, Applejack’s farm, the soil itself too. She noticed she was floating on a starry sky. Instinctively Rainbow flapped her wings and realized pain was gone, her body was intact and not need to fly to stay afloat. She blinked, trying to understand what was happening. Where was she? What was this?
"All has finished, you can relax."
This time Rainbow was able to locate voice's source, and saw she wasn't alone in this universe. There was another pony at her side. An alicorn with a dark coat and bright blue eyes that gave her a smile.
"Princess Luna!," Rainbow exclaimed with all the force of her lungs, shocked.
"It's a pleasure to see you again, Element of Loyalty."
"What does this mean?" Rainbow looked from side to side, still confused. "What has happened to me, what has happened to my friends?
"Focus you. It's just a dream, your dream, I must add. If you stay calm, you'll notice."
A dream? That made sense. Yes, that's right. Tirek's attack happened two weeks ago. I didn't fight against him, I was captured by Discord before. Rainbow scratched her head, beginning to clarify her ideas. "And are you real, or also part of a dream?”
Luna couldn't stop her laugh. "Do you think you would notice the difference? But yes, I'm real. I saw your nightmare since it began two weeks ago, but I thought you ask for help to some of your friends, especially Twilight."
"You can help me stop dreaming about this every night?," Rainbow asked hopefully, ignoring comment about her friends.
The princess frowned when heard Rainbow's words. "I can modify your dreams as I come into them, but I can't be at your side all nights. To end the nightmares, you must first confront what they represent. With that, I can help you."
"So I have to get to interpret my dream?” Rainbow protested, shaking her head, upset. "It's kind of boring things which Twilight lost days doing, and is useless."
Luna didn't answer, but her eyes said it all.
"Okay, okay, I will!" she lifted her forelegs as surrender sign. "But if it’s my dream, we go to a more comfortable place, I'm tired of floating into nothingness.”
The next time they spoke, they were in Rainbow's house, sitting in her living room. At least in the area that wasn't covered with fan mail or by innumerable display cases with gold trophies of all types and sizes. And through the windows they could see a crowd of ardent fans, trying to reach Rainbow's house while a security team kept them at bay.
"Rainbow Dash is the best!"
"I'm your number one fan, you're my hero!"
"I want to fu-!"
Last girl's words were cut sharply and rest of the crowd suddenly disappeared, as well as trophies and letters. Luna gave an annoyed look at Rainbow.
"What?" Rainbow shrugged. "I just had a damn nightmare, is it wrong to have some fun?"
"...guess you're right, I've seen worse things." Luna rolled her eyes while shuddered. "But I've come to help you with your fears, not to live a night at Rainbow Dash personal paradise.”
"I don't have fear, it's just a stupid nightmare."
"Are you sure?" Luna insisted, pressing slightly.
"Well, not exactly, I'm not afraid, I'm concerned," Dash said reluctantly. "That. Tirek could have killed us. Not even Twilight could defeat him . If we hadn't gotten her key at this point we'd be dead. None of our other enemies was so strong, it was through pure luck that we won."
"I know it." she tilted her head. "Twilight took a big risk giving our magic despite our warnings, but chose well. But let me doubt Tirek is your fear. In your dreams you face him without problems. He scares you, but it isn't what torments you."
"And if you know what it means, why don't you tell me instead of playing psychologist?," Rainbow replied. She didn't like to waste more time, I just wanted to solve that problem. She was angry, tired of not being able to sleep more than a few hours until the nightmare came back to assault her. Two weeks was too long.
"I can do it, but it won't help if you don't realize by yourself. Otherwise the nightmares will just keep repeating."
"Then tell me and we'll see if I can or not understand it," Rainbow said defiantly.
Luna stood still, thinking, considering her next move. She didn't think Rainbow Dash could be so stubborn as to not solve it alone, but she didn't find reasons to oppose her request. She sighed and just let it go with what she thought.
"You’re scared to admit you’re afraid, that there are things that affect even you. You're afraid your facade is broken and others see you as you really are. And you're afraid to lose everything when that happens. Especially lose to Fluttershy. Your encounter with Tirek was just a catalyst that has brought this to light, nothing more."
Rainbow swallowed, frozen in her seat. It wasn't true, it wasn't true at all , that's what a part of herself shouted. However, deep down, she knew what Luna was saying was true. In any case she isn't going to say it aloud. She was afraid to think Luna knew so much about her when they had seen only a few times.
"She likes you, right?," Luna asked again.
"Yes," Rainbow said dryly, although she was relieved of not having explain her fears.
"But you turned her down. Why?"
"It's a long story," Rainbow tried to excuse. She hadn't said this to Twilight, why is she going to tell her?
"We have time." a clock appeared before both ponies. "It won't be dawn for another two hours."
Rainbow was pretty sure that if she wanted to, she could force Luna out of her dream. Finishing all this questioning and wake up in his bed, hugging Tank, without having to answer to anypony. Enjoying the comfort of her home, have some breakfast and go to work. A quiet day. Until became at night and nightmares came again. She bit her lip in indecision. She don't want talk, but Luna was a princess, she couldn't throw like that. It's also true that she had asked for help. Rainbow took a deep breath and decided to trust her.
"Okay. It's just... she wouldn't be happy with me. We're very different, we're going in opposite directions. I want to become a Wonderbolt and she just wants a quiet life. If we start to date, she wouldn't support a star’s life. On the street we would have a horde of fans waiting us, reporters looking to interview, radio offering to participate in its programs. Without mention the ponies who attempted to impersonate her friends just to get me. That harassment would destroy her. I can't let happen that. I have to protect her, she's my best friend."
"And the best way to protect her is breaking her heart like that?"
"What can I do!? I had no choice!" Luna had hit just at the most hurt point, making her jump like a spring. "When it just was my business I could handle it, be with her without look for anymore, but when she kissed me I realized things couldn't remain same. I had to end her hopes of a stroke or she never would have forgotten me. I know Fluttershy, when she takes a decision nopony can stop her."
"I think it looks like the pony I have in front," pointed Luna. "Neither of you want to forget her. You love her so much that you waited her your entire lifetime.”
Rainbow didn't answer and turned her head, feeling blushed.
"I haven't met anypony is more afraid of their own feelings than you, Rainbow Dash." Luna stood up and moved toward Rainbow's armchair. "Don't you think Fluttershy deserve to know the truth and can choose?"
"If she would know she would choose me!" Rainbow shook her head, rejecting that idea completely. "And all end up like I told you!”
"Why do you lie yourself?"
"I don't lie," Rainbow replied instantly, without understanding why Luna said that.
"I've been in enough minds, I've met enough ponies to know when somepony lies shamelessly to me. But you don't lie to me. The worst thing is you trust your own lie. A lie that covers something bigger. A fear far greater than others.”
A shiver ran through Dash from head to tail. She didn't know how, she didn't understand as Luna sensed it , but she knew what she was talking about. Some images tried to jump out of her memory, but Rainbow struggled to contain them, ignore them, pretend they weren't there. Like she had been doing for five years.
"Shut up, that's not true." she put her head between her legs, curling up, running away from Luna's inquisitive eyes.
"It is, and yourself are showing it to me." Luna pointed at armrest of Rainbow's armchair. There, lonely, it laid a single red feather that had appeared out of nowhere. For something so simple, Dash's eyes widened in terror. "Tell me, who is Red Feather?"
"Enough, enough, enough of this game." Rainbow's body trembled, tears she had retained so much time started to shed without control. Memories she struggled to bury were starting to come completely out of control too. Her dream became unstable, beginning to tear. "Go away and never come back."
"You've to face your fears or they will consume you," Luna said, hurrying, realizing dream would end in any time. "You don't make the same mistake I did.”
"GO AWAY!"
Author's Note
Hello, fillies and gentlecolts, here a new chapter for your enjoyment!
Thanks to all my readers, your comments and likes give me forces to continue writting.
The first thing Rainbow felt as she woke was an oppressive sensation, as if she were in a place too tightly packed and without air. The sheets had adhered to her body and wrapped in such a way that she had to fight against them for a few seconds to escape. Her breathing was fast and faltering, her body drenched in sweat and her eyes completely full of tears as in her dream. She groped, trembling, until she found her lamp on the bedside table. The light illuminated the room. Finally Dash could begin to calm herself.
"It hasn’t been real,” she said to herself. “It’s just been another nightmare, just that.”
Suddenly she felt a strange sensation on her right foreleg, and she jumped away by instinct. Frightened, she looked for the origin and visibly relaxed when she saw Tank rubbing his head against her own. She wasn’t sure how long he was in the bed, but he looked worried. Very worried, in fact. Rainbow knew her pet well enough to realize how much he was affected.
“I’m sorry, Tank.” she caressed, trying to calm him. “It was just a nightmare, you don’t have to be scared.”
Just a nightmare. Even when saying it aloud, an intense shiver went through her from top to bottom. Every detail of this dream was in her mind so clearly that it seemed to be branded. She could almost see it, even with open eyes, just as if it were an experience she had really lived. Especially when Luna appeared, and her last words; You have to face your fears.
She shook her head vigorously. It wasn’t real. No matter how it seems. There is no way this is real! I have to forget. That's right... just forget it.
She looked at the clock and her lungs gasped for air. It was six in the morning, the time on the clock that Luna had set up in the dream. Just a few hours before dawn. No! No no no! It's just my imagination, it’s purely coincidental. She drew Tank in and hugged him, hoping to banish her bad thoughts. It was comforting to have him at her side, but his presence wasn’t enough to prevent Luna’s voice resonating inside her.
“C’mon champ,” Rainbow urged the turtle, with an idea in mind. “I need a bath to relax myself . And I know you love hot water too.”
It was a trick that had always worked for her. After a particularly hard day there was nothing better than diving in her bathtub and taking a relaxing foam bath, no matter what might have happened. And today she really needed to relax. Stretching, she got out of bed and went to the bathroom with Tank floating behind her. She hurried to prepare everything, eager to leave the nightmare behind.
The hot water relaxed her muscles better than if she had taken hours of rest, and at the same time served to clear her mind. Dash entertained playing with Tank and some toys she had gotten for him while she took the time to clean her hair and hooves thoroughly. At one point, she fell on her back, leaving only her head above water. The lost sleep was taking its price and Rainbow found it increasingly difficult to keep her eyelids open.
She tried to focus, knowing it wasn’t a good idea to sleep in the bath. Her eyes fixed on the steam floated on the air and how hit the bathroom cloud wall produced swirls. An old memory made her smile. When she was little, she and her father watched the wall while bathing and competed to see who saw the biggest number of shapes and objects. And she won, of course. Rainbow had always been great in competition, but now she was sure at least a couple of times her father had lost on purpose.
With that idea in mind, she looked at the wall looking for figures. She didn’t have to work hard and soon accumulated a great number, but playing alone it wasn’t very funny. With a flick called attention of Tank, intending to add him to game. “Ey Tank, don’t you think this one is like a dragon’s head? Look, that other one looks like a sled. And that—”
It was the pegasus’ vague shape, but it wasn’t what Rainbow was seeing. Red. It was exactly like Red Feather. For a second Dash froze, and then jumped and hit the wall, completely out of herself.
“No! Enough, just enough, you can’t appear in my life and do this again, you can’t, you're dead!” she closed her eyes, even though there wasn’t anything to see. On the wall there was now only a gap and many cloud small pieces scattered everywhere. “You're dead... I killed you.”
It was the first time she said it aloud. The first time she was allowed to recall what happened five years ago, that day at the Academy. Rainbow collapsed, unable to stand up, overwhelmed. By her side Tank tried to comfort his owner, not understanding what was happening, but she didn’t react. At this moment there was nothing and no one, only the image of that horrible day persisting in her memory. She gritted her teeth, trying to hold back the tears. Crying was useless, didn’t serve for anything, and wouldn’t restore life to Red. It was never fixed then, and isn’t going to fix now.
Rainbow couldn’t deny the dream had been something else no longer. If this wasn’t still a dream, she thought. In any case, it didn’t matter. You have to face your fears . Now princess Luna’s phrase had come back, clearer than ever, and she couldn’t ignore it. Slowly she got out from the bath, letting her legs find the way for her. Her mind was elsewhere and didn’t even feel the cold from being soaked.
She crossed the room and opened her closet; hooves scrambled inside, pushing things down until she reached for a cardboard box located at the bottom, with the initials RD drawn on top with red permanent. She grabbed it and began to empty its contents on the bed until finding what she wanted. The Academy yearbook.
A deep breath escaped of her mouth. For a moment Rainbow didn’t know what do and remained staring at the cover. It wasn’t an easy decision, but the words of the princess kept urging her to continue. After a last hesitation, she opened the book and began to turn the pages slowly, as if she was trying to delay the moment. Finally Dash stopped, finding him. In Equestria, single color ponies were rare, just like the brown pegasus that appeared in the photography. The only thing breaking it was a small tuft of red in his hair, with shape of a feather. Rainbow swallowed. It could have been five years, but the image of Red was enough to reopen the wound in her heart.
Dash never imagined she would do this, be thinking about or seeing a photograph of him again. However she suddenly found herself turning the pages, smiling at each memory recorded on the album. Each photo was a twinge in her chest, yes, but also was accompanied by a handful of happiness. That year at the Academy had been one of the happiest in her life. It was hard to believe everything had twisted that way.
You have to face your fears . Rainbow now knew what Luna wanted to get with those words. But it wasn’t so easy to do. If she revealed, if she said the truth, she would lose everything. Her parents would be shattered, her friends never speak to her again, even her dreams of being a Wonderbolt would vanish forever. How could she say that she was a murderer?
No, she couldn’t. It was better to forget everything, let it go. Talking was madness, definitely. And Rainbow knew she could do it. Just had to ignore this dream, live her life as if nothing had happened. The nightmares would follow, what mattered? At the end they disappear, as they had when Red died. And Luna? She was a problem, but after what had happened Dash didn’t think she’d return to her dreams for a long time. Luna wouldn’t discover more things about her, Rainbow was sure of that. She just had to forget everything.
Nodding to herself, she started to pick up stuffs for returning to the box. This time she’d put it in the rubbish. Trophies, ribbons, lecture notes, all came back to the same place. Then she took the yearbook and when was she tried to throw it in, her forelegs stopped. Biting her lip, she tried again, but failed. The next tries had identical result. I can’t do anything else, this is the best option. I have to do this. I must do this.
So why was she unable to do it?
Because Luna was right, absolutely right, Rainbow realized. Admitting that stunned her. Now she could almost see before herself the mask of appearances and lies she had been building for years, as if they were a tangible object. Fear. Even in her mind, Rainbow Dash could hardly accept that word was referring to her. But part of herself began to assume it was true. She was hiding every feeling that might make her look weak.
Rainbow already felt unable to continue with more lies, pretending all was fine while the remorse for what happened five years ago devoured her. But the other option was to tell the truth and just thinking about it made her feel real panic. She couldn’t go back, but neither was she sure of having the strength to go on. She looked for Tank, searching for support.
“I want to say the truth. To my parents, my friends, I really want to. You think they can forgive me?”
Without the least doubt Tank nodded. Rainbow's eyes flooded with tears as she hugged him again. She had never been happier for having him by her side. You really are the best pet everypony could want . He was right. She had to be brave and trust in their loved ones. The outlook remained frightening, but this time she was ready to face them. I will. I'll tell them, they deserve to know the truth.
Then Dash began to shiver and was aware she was soaked, so she quickly wrapped herself in a towel to keep warm. While drying her fur, she realized she hadn’t thought about who said her secret first. Her father was in Cloudsdale and her mother in Manehattan, so for now they were discarded. And she didn’t dare to tell her friends at the same time.
Actually, she knew who wanted to tell first. The image of a yellow pegasus appeared in her mind again and again. Fluttershy was the perfect choice. If a pony could forgive her for what she did, it would be her. She trusted on Fluttershy like no other pony. But after everything that had occurred between them, Rainbow wasn’t sure what could happen if she confessed.
Since the date incident, things hadn’t been the same say. The visit of Twilight convinced Rainbow that she had to apologize with Fluttershy, so she did. And it was even worse. She had barely finished speaking and Fluttershy forgave her. In her eyes there wasn’t even a hint of bitterness. On the contrary, it was obvious she felt guilty for what happened. Rainbow almost shouted out of frustration at that moment. She deserved Fluttershy's wrath, insults, even a good kick aching for days, not her kindness!
But with it all, Fluttershy never come to be comfortable by her side again. She kept the distance, barely looked at her and if accidentally they touched, she put her aside. If they found each other in the town, Fluttershy hurried to pick up an alternative route to avoid crossing. Later, when the Games were held, she never spoke during workouts. And when Discord revealed his betrayal and his alliance with Tirek, Rainbow was heartbroken to see how she went into Applejack’s forelegs for comfort instead of her own.
But they were still friends. And now more than ever Rainbow needed her friendship.
Taking the decision, Rainbow went home, accompanied by Tank and carrying the yearbook. It was still dark, but Dash knew her friend got up very early to take care of all the animals, so she wouldn’t have to wake her. She flew swiftly to Fluttershy's cottage, unable to wait more time, fearing she wouldn’t be able to do it if thought twice.
Lighted windows confirmed the presence of Fluttershy inside. Landing on her doorstep, Rainbow hit the door several times, maybe a little harder than it should. She began to feel a terrible knot in the stomach and a pressing need to run away. The courage was slipping rapidly, but she managed to remain in place. Fluttershy had to know. She more than anypony deserved to know the truth.
The door was opened and Fluttershy stepped outwards. Her mane was more disheveled than usual and her eyes still showed sleep traces, it was obvious she had just wake up. Realizing who hoped out she come back a little and looked down.
“Rainbow? What’s up? Is there something wrong with Tank?” she asked, with a hint of concern in her soft voice.
“No, he's fine. I just wondering... can I talk with you for a moment? It’s important.”
Fluttershy hesitated for a moment, then nodded and left space for them could enter. They went into the living room, where Fluttershy invited to sit her friend on the couch while Tank settled into one of the cushions on the floor. Several minutes passed without the two saying a word. Rainbow had made several attempts, but didn’t know how to start. It didn’t help that her throat was completely dry. She was already there, but couldn’t help wondering the same thing over and over again. Can you forgive me, Fluttershy? What do you think about me?
“Rainbow... you're scaring me. What’s happened?”
She took a deep breath and gathered all her courage she began to speak . “There is something... something I wanted to tell you. You see, I guess you remember in the Academy I started to pick up some ponies. Well, some fillies too, well, actually, what I mean is,” Focus Dash she thought, scolding of herself, “in my last year I met a colt named Red Feather from the drama club. He was handsome, friendly, smart and…” Stop all this, tell her important. “We started to go out. He was different from all other coltfriends I'd had. Many just wanted to go out with me because I was popular, but he really loved me. We were more a year together. But one day... I was training in the gym…
*******************
Five years ago...
“Ey, good kick!”
Rainbow turned and dropped the rugby ball, surprised to hear somepony at such an hour. A huge smile appeared on her face when saw Red Feather behind her. Knowing they were alone in the gym, she didn’t hesitate to jump on and kiss him hard. Red struggled to contain her enthusiasm without falling back, even being considerably larger than his fillyfriend.
“What are you doing here at this hour?” Rainbow said.
“Hey, you're not the only one who has to practice. We just finished an extra function essay for next week. I told you a few days ago, clueless. Did the trainer crush you so much that you forgot what I said? Oh, my little Dashie…” he joked, stroking the Rainbow’s multicolor mane.
Dash launched a blow to his chest, not too strong but enough to call his attention. “Didn’t tell you don’t call me that? You know perfectly that's how my father calls me, when you say sounds very weird.”
“Since don’t let me call you sweet or honey in public, I thought using something you're used to…”
“Oh, shut up,” she put a hoof in his mouth, hushing him. “I don’t want everypony in the Academy thinking I’m a pussy, I have a reputation to uphold.”
“Yes, it would be terrible if they found out you're a romantic,” Red said with obvious irony, set Rainbow’s hoof aside.
“Hey, that's not true!” Dash said, starting to get annoyed.
“Well, that raid at my house you did the other night doesn’t say the same…”
“You just returned from your trip!” she replied, totally blushing.
“From a weekend trip.” Red pointed. “And you received me as if I were gone a whole year. And you said ‘I love you’ just after finishing. Do you still say you're not romantic?”
“You said so as well.” she muttered, got away a little.
“Yes. Because it’s true. I love you.”
Red walked over and wrapped her in his wings. At first Rainbow agreed reluctantly, but after a few minutes close to him she couldn’t help but return the embrace. They put their heads together and shared another kiss, this time longer and quiet.
“This weekend we could go to the cinema,” Red commented when they separated. “It’s casting a romantic comedy…” he laughed when was struck by the look of Dash. “It’s a joke, it’s a joke! What do you think about Sadistic Murderers II?
“That’s better.” she nodded with satisfaction. “Will you hide under the seat like last time?”
“Touché. I guess I deserve it.” he got down her head, smiling in defeat. “Well, I keep you practicing, I’ll wait for you up there.” he said pointing the stands. “Afterwards we could go home together.”
They shared one last quick kiss and then Red grabbed his backpack and started up the stands stairs. But he couldn’t help making one last joke before taking a seat.
“You can, my little Dashie!”
Dash's response wasn’t verbal, but a ball fired at full speed. Instinctively he jumped to avoid, realizing immediately the ball wouldn’t have hurt anyway.
And then his hooves slipped, knocking him off balance. Unlike in the movies, the fall didn’t happen in slow motion, but so fast that he had no time to react. Red fell down the stairs, knocking several times, being pulled near the end of them, accompanied by a loud crash.
“RED!” Rainbow didn’t hesitate and shot toward the stands, ready to assist her coltfriend.
And this time the universe stopped, at least for her.
The pegasus might have been sleeping, but his neck was lying in a totally unnatural position and his eyes... his eyes were empty, dull. To anypony it was obvious he was dead.
********
“I couldn’t believe, so I searched for help. The coach was there and came very quickly, but he couldn’t do anything. The Academy did some research and said it had been an accident. I wanted to tell the truth, that it was my fault he had slipped, but I was afraid of what might happen. I didn’t dare tell to anypony, even my parents. I didn’t want them see me as a monster.”
“After that I couldn’t return to the Academy. I tried, but it all reminded me of Red, each site where he once was. Once I turned eighteen I left Cloudsdale and came here, I got into the climate team and I decided to forget it all and get on with my life. I kept the photos, trophies, everything I had of the Academy and hid them.”
While she told the story her head lowered more and more, finally staring at the floor. It was done. Now Fluttershy knew the whole truth. It hadn’t been easy, but now that she finished to speak she felt better, although not really relief. Now she needed to hear what Fluttershy had to say.
But time went on and there wasn’t sign of Fluttershy was going to say something. Rainbow wanted to look up and see what her friend thought, but she didn’t dare. And if there was rejection on her face? Or fear? If your best friend thinked so, what would the others?
The silence was a torture and Rainbow couldn’t wait longer, so she had to say something. “Sorry Fluttershy, I know I’m a monster—”
The slap across her face completely by surprise. Stunned and hurt, she looked up and saw Fluttershy with tears in her eyes, as if she was who had been hit. And then her friend hugged her. Rainbow didn’t understand anything, she didn’t know how react to these two contradictory information.
“Don’t say it again.” Fluttershy chided her. “Never say you're a monster. That's a lie.”
Dash looked her, surprised, not understanding how she could say that. “But if I hadn’t, he would still... it was my fault!”
“It was an accident, it’s not your fault!” she increased the tone doing Rainbow shut up. Even so, Fluttershy’s voice seems more a beg for Rainbow. “He wouldn’t want you to blame yourself for what happened. It was an accident, so don’t even say you're a monster.” she repeated, putting more emphasis in her voice.
A tear fell down Rainbow’s cheek. And then another. Before she realized she wept silently, embarrassed, but at same time relieved for the first time in years. During this time she had always been sure about one thing, she was the one responsible for Red’s death and there was nothing that could change that. But Fluttershy, knowing all the truth, insisted Rainbow wasn’t guilty. And somehow Rainbow believed her, she didn’t know how, but looking at her friend’s eyes she couldn’t think otherwise. There was nothing except sincerity in that sight.
The embrace lasted a long time, even when Dash’s tears were already dry. Rainbow wondered how long it would last until her friend noticing. It was the first time Fluttershy touched her again since that night. One more time, she returned to regret. If I could just go back... if I hadn’t been so stupid, maybe... if I had said how important it is for me. Really, not only as friends.
But it was too late.
As predicted, Fluttershy suddenly turned away, not abruptly, but clearly trying get away. “Are you... are you better?”
“Yes, I think so. Thanks,” she said while outlining a warm smile.
Fluttershy smiled back. “Well, I’m going to take care of the animals, you should get some rest…” she paused for a moment. “If you want, you can stay here,” she added so quietly that Rainbow barely heard her.
“I think I’ll do that.” Now Fluttershy said, Rainbow realized how exhausted she was. And she didn’t want to go home, not yet. She wanted to stay here, with Fluttershy nearby.
“Okay, well... I'll be here if you need something.”
Fluttershy finally got away and left alone to Rainbow, who laid on the couch and closed her eyes. Now that she had finally confessed she could surrender to a peaceful sleep, knowing whatever happen, Fluttershy would be with her from now on.
And that was all she needed.
Author's Note
I'm back with new chapter for us. Sorry for so long waiting, holidays are a bad time for the inspiration.
I want to say, how you can see, I'm not using fifth season facts in this story. It was designed for fourth season and will remain this way.
