Chapter 1: The welcoming...
"Spike! Come on!" Twilight shouted.
"We have to go and carry out the royal duties for Princess Celestia!" she shouted again.
Twilight had had enough, with a quick moment of focusing her brain and a glow of her horn the small, irritating and lazy assistant was laying beside her, not exactly in the best of shape.
"Oh Spike, you don't look to good." Twilight said in a concerned tone.
"Ya' think!" Spike said in a weak tone as he mustered all his remaining energy to make the comment.
"Alright, no need to get your tail in a knot." Twilight said as she fired up her horn again.
With that Spike was out of the room and 'hopefully' upstairs in bed.
"Right, now to go and meet that new pony from Canterlot that has ties with the Princesses." Twilight said to herself before trotting out the door to the 'Ponyville Train Station' where the pony would be stopping.
As Twilight trotted out the door she was pleasantly greeted by the golden glow and warmth of the sun on her coat and the sight of a busy Ponyville. The trot to 'Ponyville Train Station' was short and simple with Twilight only stopping once in a while to greet somepony or have a small chat.
"Not too much to worry about." Twilight said confidently.
As the clock struck 4pm and rung out its alert of the time, a large steam belching, silver machine pulled into 'Ponyville Train Station'. The machine was covered in various spinning cogs, cables, pistons, dials, lights, labels and random widgets. A gold embroided plate of metal rested on the front of mechanical marvel read 'Canterlot Express'.
"Since when has Canterlot had this?" Twilight quietly said to herself in suprise as she waited for the new pony in town.
"Since I built it." Came a voice from the closest train carriage.
"Wait what?" Twilight asked curiously as she looked around for the source of the voice.
"That is my machine." Came the voice again.
Twilight finally caught the direction of the voice's source and turned round to come face to face with a crimson pegasus.
The crimson pegasus had a long spiky mane and tail with white and grey highlights
"Aahh!" Twilight screamed as she fell back onto her hind.
"O-oh so-sorry." The crimson pegasus said as he tried to hold back his laughter.
"What was that for?!" Twilight shouted in rage.
"My apologies I like to pull a prank when I get a chance." the crimson pony commented.
"Still, who are you?" Twilight asked inquisitevly.
"Again, my apologies name's Ember Cogwork, Inventing's my game." the crimson said with a smug grin featuring his face.
"Just so you know, that rhyme doesn't work." the conductor said with a irritated face.
"Hey! Were you in this conversation?!" Ember shouted.
"No." was all the conductor said before walking away.
"Anyway. Princess Celestia said that she had someone that would be meeting me here." Ember said.
"Oh, your the new pony!" Twilight said.
"And your the person meeting me here I guess?" Ember suggested.
"Yes. I am." Twilight said.
"Can I possibly know your name, you know just a bit better if I can name you in a conversation." Ember asked with a sly grin adorning his face.
"Oh yes, I'm Twilight Sparkle." Twilight replied.
"Oh I've heard alot about you from Princess Celestia. She thinks very highly of you, and so I do too." Ember commented.
"W-well, um, thank's i guess." Twilight stuttered in confusion.
"So... Do you want to show me around?" asked Ember.
"Sure." Twilight said.
"Right okay, I'll go get my saddlebags from the train." Ember said.
2 minutes later the crimson pegasus emerged from the carriage with 2 large, bulky saddlebags with gear symbols on the buckles.
"You sure that's enough?" Twilight said sarcastically.
"Oh no, this is just my basic luggage. All my other stuff is over there." Ember said as he pointed to a large wagon piled high with hundreds of bags, boxs and containers.
"1 minute please." Ember said before walking over to the conductor.
"Could you please have this delivered to '78 filly's court' Whistle." Ember said.
"Of course Mr. Cogwork." was all the conductor said in reply.
"Thank you." Ember said politely before walking back to Twilight.
"Shall we go then?" Ember suggested.
"Yes, where should we go first?" Twilight asked.
"Uh, could we go and get some food? I didn't have anything to eat yet." Ember complained.
"Okay."
"Oh wait! I almost forgot." Ember said as he galloped over to the cart and grabbed a medium sized box in his mouth before walking back over.
Inside the box was a pair of dark boots, both of them featured a large amount of wires, dials and various metal widgets.
"What are those?" Twilight asked curiously.
"Little invention I made for myself, there called 'Walkmaps'. Basically while I walk they collect data of the surrounding area and where I walk and store all of this data in these data-chips, the data inside these can then be used in one of my other machines to give me a map of Ponyville for me to use whenever." Ember said.
"Wow, I didn't even know ponykind has this technology!" Twilight exclaimed.
"It doesn't, these are prototypes and I am still working out the... kinks." Ember said with a small scowl adorning his face.
"Oh, okay." Twilight said as she noticed Ember's expression.
"Anyway... let's go to Sugarcube Corner." Twilight said before walking off the 'Ponyville Train Station' platform.
"Alright, give me a second." Ember said as he fumbled with his boots, pressing many different switches before getting them working.
The walk too Sugarcube Corner was rather normal with the only difference being Ember catching a unseen amount of attention to his 'Walkmaps' and himself, by the time they had made it too Sugarcube Corner Ember had managed to get a small crowd to follow him. When they finally got to Sugarcube Ember decided to breif the crowd so he could lose all the attention and just eat quietly. Luckily for him it had worked and the crowd quickly dispersed after he finished.
"Well, now that we got that over and done with, can we please get something to eat." Ember said as he walked into Sugarcube Corner.
"You might want to prepare yourself..." Twilight said.
"For w--" Ember was cut off as he was hit by a pink coloured pony at top speed.
"Ohmigosh! Areyouanewponyintown? WellyoumustbebecauseIknoweverponyinponyville! I know what this means! A PA--" the hyper pink pony was stopped in the hurricane which was her speech by a orange hoof.
"Sorry, Pinkie hear get's lil' bit excited about new ponies." the owner of the orange hoof said.
"Ember, I told you to prepare yourself." Twilight said as she let a smug grin adorn her face.
"Hang on." Ember said.
"A.H.I, I need to take a reminder." Ember said.
"Who in Celestia is Ahi?" Twilight asked.
At that moment the metal peice of jewelry on Ember's foreleg lit up with a blue light that showed a small mare, the mare was criss-crossed with several brighter lines of blue and had a long mane and tail made of pulsing blue.
"Yes Mr. Cogwork?" the picture said in a loud and unnatural mare's voice.
"Initiate reminder program." Ember said.
All the other ponies watched in awe as mare on the screen grabbed an artificial notpad and quill.
"Ready to take notes for your reminder Mr. Cogwork." The picture said again.
"Remind me to let Twilight walk in first for any other place we go and also remind me to prepare myself." Ember said.
"Reminder taken Mr. Cogwork, Shall I keep analysers and sensors on?" The picture said.
"Probally best to do it that way." Ember said.
"Also do you wish to remain on so you can chat too these other lovely ponies?" Ember said.
"I guess so Mr. Cogwork." the picture said.
"Alright, Initiate hologram." Ember said.
"Of course Mr. Cogwork." the picture said.
The rest of the ponies in the room looked in awe as the screen lit up even brighter and a small blue pony stood ontop of it.
"Everypony, this is A.H.I" Ember said as he motioned his other hoof to the small bright blue pony ontop of his peice of jewelry.
"Well... um... Howdy?" the orange mare in the stetson said.
"Everpony there is no need to be scared. A.H.I is practically a normal pony, she is my personal helper and she is fine to talk with." Ember said.
"Ohmigoshyouliveinawatch! Tha--" the pink pony was soon cut off again by the orange hoof.
"A.H.I do you wish to introduce yourself?" Ember suggested.
"Yes Mr. Cogwork." A.H.I replied.
"My name is A.H.I, it stands for 'Artificial Holographic Intelligence' but my social name is Ahilese. Mr. Cogwork made me as a artificial helper to him, and also some company to him when he works. I am pleased to meet you all.
"Wow...Tha-thats amazing!" Twilight exclaimed.
"Yeah Ahilese is definetly a someone. She's like my version of Princess Celestia's royal scribe, only better." Ember said.
A few sparks showed up on Ahilese's cheeks at this comment and she looked down at the watch below her.
"Anyway Twilight could you please introduce us to these ponies?" Ember asked.
"Oh, yeah!" Twilight remebered.
"Applejack works up on Sweet Apple Acres, Ponyville's apple farm and Pinkie Pie works here in Sugarcube Corner." Twilight said as she pointed to the two mares.
"Pleased t' meet ya' Mr. Cogwork!" Applejack said.
"Please Ember is fine." Ember said.
"You know what that means!" Pinkie exclaimed.
Author's Notes:
Little experimental comedy fanfic for you guys! Hope you enjoy and don't be suprised if some random s**t comes up in the story. :D
Chapter 2: ...Paaartey!!!
After Pinkie Pie had retrieved her party cannon, several streamers, confectionery and other random party must-haves had been fired off and everypony attending had got drunk off fluttershy's liqour, everypony finally started to enjoy themselves.
Ember all the time had been seated on a sofa in the corner, using A.H.I for various 'tasks' and only having a couple of rounds of liqour so he remained a working pony to do his business.
Over the course of the party various things had transpired, including Ditsy Doo, Ponyville's local mail mare getting her head stuck in a lamp shade and repeatedly continued to walk into a wall afterwards and for some reason, Vinyl Scratch was now spinning herself on the turntable since she was 'most likely' drunk to a large extent.
"Come 'n Mister...... Mister...... Mi--" Applejack said before passing out on the floor infront of an incoming konga line.
After Applejack, Fluttershy proceeded to drunkenly walking over to Ember carrying a bottle of 'Beaksies Finest' illegal Griffon-made imported liqour, all the time snickering to herself lightly after she hiccuped from the amount of the illegal liqour she had consumed.
"Come and gi- *hiccup* me a big kiss Mr. Cogwork." Fluttershy said in a drunk tone as she wobbled over to Ember.
As fluttershy became only a few hoof's away from Ember, pursing her lips in a attempted kiss, the crimson pony briskly jumped off the couch and galloped for the door.
"I had this happen to me once and I am not having it again!" Ember shouted as he galloped out of Sugarcube corner.
After Ember had galloped far enough to be sure he was away from the 'Drunk Squad' he calmed down as slowed his pace to a brisk trot.
"A.H.I, Engage navigational tool." Ember said.
The mare popped up on the screen again, but instead of her usual cybernetic blue she was recoloured to a dim pink with small weak sparks coming off her body.
"Do it yourself you lazy bugger!" A.H.I said in a average drunk mare's voice before rolling over onto her side and breaking into a fit of laughter.
Ember quickly proceeded to wear a un-suprised look on his face before pressing A.H.I's manual offswitch and sighing.
"Dammit, Pinkie!" Ember shouted in knowledge that somepony from the party had probally spilled some of liqour on his watch.
"Well I guess I might as well go home." Ember said before trotting down the road which he faintly recognized.
After about 20 minutes or so of getting in lost in Ponyville, Ember finally found his home.
It was a large 3 story house, with the style of most of the other houses.
As Ember proceeded to the door he heard a faint voice from behind, that made his face going stiff with fear.
"I still didn't get that kiss." came the voice.
As Ember turned around he saw the butter-yellow pegasus, the party rubbing off on her looks which were completed with bloodshot eyes, a mangled set of mane and tail and a large grin that made up the centerpeice.
Without wasting another second Ember quickly turned around to try and open his door, but as he was about to succeed with fumbling the lock to the right position, the liqour smuggling pegasus mare had already landed ontop of him.
"Now your gonna have to pay more..." Fluttershy said in her drunk tone.
"Well shit..." Ember said before quickly pressing one of the buttons that went round his watch's screen.
After he pressed the button, two long metal sticks that ended in minuscule needles slid out, without a second thought, Ember slammed his wrist up into Fluttershy's neck, his hoof being stopped halfway through the action as the needles hit home and probally made contact with Fluttershy's collar.
Within seconds Ember felt the pegasus go limp on his back and proceeded to slide the unconscious Fluttershy off his body with the use of his wings.
"I guess she staying her tonight then." Ember said before heaving a sigh.
"A.H--" Ember started before remebering A.H.I too was drunk and proceeded to walk to his bags before pulling out a notepad and pen.
"No'...t'...sef'..." Ember mumbled through his mouth that clasped the pen.
"Rai'...Fwuttershy's...for...the...re't...of...'er...boozs'..." Ember said before finishing the note.
"Well, best get her on the sofa, only damn peice of comfortable furniture around." Ember complained before dragging the pegasus inside and lifting her onto the sofa.
"Now, I think I best go and fix Ahilese. Why the hell did I even put that in?" Ember said to himself before proceeding back to his luggage and grabbing a large, black toolbox in his mouth.
Ember woke up to find his nostrils being lured by a pleasant smell of cooking pancakes coming from the kitchen. At this smell he almost unconscouisly proceeded downstairs towards the source of the aroma.
When his eyes finally decided it was time to take action he found a butter-yellow pegasus propped up against the counter, where she appeared to be cutting apples.
"Mornin' Fluttershy." Ember said before letting out a long yawn.
"Good morning Mr. Cogwork." the butter-yellow pegasus replied.
"Wait... Fluttershy?!" Ember shouted before proceeding to fumble with his watch again.
Fluttershy turned around, clasping a frying-pan handle in her teeth as she proceeded to flip them, but instead fell limp again with the pancakes landing on her mane.
"Well, Shit..."
Author's Notes:
Hope you guys all enjoyed second chapter and found it a good laugh. Another chapter coming soon!
