The fucked up life of Lynx.

by midnight blaze00

Wolf...really needs to shut up

Previous Chapter

Author's Note

So it has definitely been a while since I last updated, and I'm sorry about that. My computer finally met its end by hand of the virus. :raritycry: Well anyway, hope you like the new chapter and I'll see ya next time! :derpytongue2:
Oh, and Wolf's dialogue will be in green to make more sense in the story.


Wolf...really needs to shut up

Lynx quickly made his way through the castle, greeting solar and lunar guards along the way as he passed, and stopping to salute officers. Saluting rules were a bit different in the guard than the Army or the Air Force on earth. Here, you had to salute any officer that you saw inside or outside. That wouldn't be so bad on a normal day in the castle, but today a promotion ceremony was held and the senior officers were showing the new 2nd Lieutenants their jobs and around the castle.

Seeing how there were plenty of office jobs available in the castle and no pony willing to take them, the Princess thought that it was a grand idea that the equestrian guard should fill in those positions. Only the officers though. After all, office is in their classification, is it not?

Lynx sighed as he gave up running through the castle and began a slow, but brisk, walk to keep up with the waves of officers he had to salute. Seeing another pair of officers walking in his direction, he stopped, stood at attention, saluted, and said:

"Good afternoon sir!"

The two officers stopped. One officer was a light green unicorn with jet black, shaggy hair with amber eyes, bearing a set of gold armor with the rank of a 2nd Lieutenant.

'Weird eh Lynx? They haven't taken his colors yet…'
The other officer was a white earth pony with blue hair that came down to the start of his neck. He had icy blue eyes and bore a gold set of armor with a 1st Lieutenant rank on it. On his side, hung a purple amythest dagger in a leather sheath. More than anything though, the officer hated the enlisted. Case in point: Lynx.

The 1st LT. smiled evily. The new officer went to salute Lynx back, and let both parties continue with their duties, but the senior officer had other plans, as he stopped the 2LT's hoof from coming up. Lynx gulped and continued to hold his salute.

'Just remember Lynx, keep your cool...'
'but he's as bad as blueblood!'

'And you won't let me remember that one memory!'
'Shut up wolf.'

"Ah yes, perfect. LT. Glistening Stone, this is a Seargent. You can usually tell by the lack of superior performance and bars." Lynx winced a little. Wolf laughed in Lynx's head.

'Crystal would so kick his ass for saying that.'
The 1st. LT continued. "Seargent First Class and below are at your beck and call, and you can get them demoted for not following your orders."

'Bullshit!'

"They are just our petty slaves in a general sense." Lynx clenched his fist tightly. Lynx didn't know if he could hold his salute for much longer. The urge to resist throwing this asshole and launch him out of the nearby window was extremely painfull. The 1st Lieutenant continued.

"Watch and learn. Seargent Shadow..."
Somewhere down the hall behind them, a familiar guard's voice called out,

"Stop right there, 1st Lieutenant! Seargent, at ease!" Lynx smiled as the officers in front of him stiffened and saluted, while he relaxed. Captain Night Striker strolled up next to Lynx, glareing at the Lieutenant with his feirce amber eyes. The 1st. Lieutenant visibly gulped. Lynx grinned slightly.

"G-Good afternoon C-Captain..." The 1st Lieutenant shakily said, not dropping his salute. The Captain growled.

"What is the meaning of this Lieutenant?! Teaching the new officers bad habits, and insulting fellow guards!" Lynx shook his head at the Lieutenant teasingly. The furious Captain continued. "Do that to the privates as you wish, but a Seargent!? Are you bucking kidding me?!" The Lieutenant was shaking slightly.
Lynx knew full well why. Nobody pisses off Night Striker. So, the Lt. came up with a dumb ass answer.

"But sir, they do rank lower than we do, so why show them any respect?" Lynx gave a low whistle. The Captain's gaze intensified.
'bad move LT...' Wolf whispered in Lynx's head. Lynx agreed with Wolf.
The new officer looked at the Lieutenant in suprise and anger. Time was ticking. Lynx cleared his throat.

"Well...Captain i would like to let you handle this one, i have to go meet the princess." The Captain nodded as the 2nd Lieutenant turned to Lynx and saluted.

"Sorry about this Seargent, this may be my first day, but even I know that the enlisted deserve respect."
Lynx smiled and returned the salute.

"Thank you Lieutenant." The 2nd Lieutenant nodded and they both dropped their salutes and Lynx sped away towards the throne room.

Even as Lynx made it to the throne room, he could hear Night Striker yelling. The officers at the throne room door were much more friendly. Lynx nodded to them, and saluted as they opened the throne room doors.

"Afternoon Seargent, any idea why Captain Striker is yelling?" A white guardspony with grey shadow armor holding the door open for him asked. Lynx shook his head.

"Lt. Silver Bit just insulted me, and all of the enlisted rank." The guardspony raised a brow.
"I'm sorry to hear that, i will personally give him a piece of my mind as well."

Lynx smiled. "Thank you, Have a good day."
"And you as well."

With that, Lynx walked into the throne room and bowed deeply before Celestia, just to piss her off. She gave Lynx a dissaproving sigh as she shook her head at him in annoyance.

"Rise. Guards, you are dismissed."
Her two personal guards at her side nodded and then left the room, leaving Celestia and Lynx alone. Celestia got up off her throne and walked up to Lynx. Her magenta colored eyes were tinged with slight annoyance.

"I thought i told you that you don't need to bow to me?" Celestia scolded. Lynx smiled and shrugged.
"Well...Tia, i am a guard, would you like me to salute you instead?" Celestia sighed.

"....No."
'We should kiss her.' Wolf randomly said, making Lynx slightly uncomfortable about how close he was to the princess. Her muzzle was just inches away, and it looked ever so inviting...Lynx quickly removed that thought from his head and spoke.

"So, Princess, why did you need to see me?" Celestia didn't answer as she walked over to one of the giant windows and sat, while Lynx took the chance to sit down, his mind wandering as she observed the weather outside with unsure eyes. Celestia turned to face him, waving her hoof, putting him at ease.

"I have a favor to ask you." Lynx looked at her with his narrowed and unsure, dark brown eyes. Celestia's favors normally were pretty bad for Lynx, but he never complained. She was the boss here after all.

"Ok..."
Celestia shifted her hooves nervously, her eyes looking at the floor. Lynx gulped.

'Wait...she acted like this before...'
'Yeah and then you got laid.'

'Shut up Wolf.'
'But it's true!'

Before Lynx could tell wolf to shut up again, Celestia spoke.
"I need you to go to the gala."

'Ah HELL NAH!' Wolf and Lynx thought simultaneously as Lynx shook his head quickly at Celestia. All of the guards hated the gala. It basically was a graveyard shift with uptight and stuck up royals coming together to discuss business propositions, get into fights, make enemies, and see how much the guards stationed there could handle. Lynx had already been assigned once before, but never again.

"Sorry, but hell no. C'mon Tia, you know how much i hate guard duty there!"
Celestia countered.

"Except, this time, you will be not be on guard duty. I have sent Twilight six tickets for her and each of her friends. So, you should go with them, have fun for once!"

Lynx sighed. "But..."
Celestia cut him off. She looked at Lynx dead in the eye.

"However, there is a catch. We have had reports of a rumor that somepony will try and hurt my sister."
"Ok...but why me? Why not Night Striker, or your guards, or somepony else?"

Celestia grinned. "Because i said so."
Lynx growled. Wolf laughed in Lynx's head.

'Ooh the mother card...kudos to you celly....'
"So we're playing it this way huh? I'll remember that. The answer is still no."

Then Lynx bowed, and headed towards the throne room doors. Celestia smiled as she used her trump card.

"Come on, after all, i heard Captain Spitfire will be there...." Lynx's eyes bulged and he stopped. Turning around, he was met with Celestia's checkmate grin.

'Damnit.'
'Oooh....she got you good.'

'Oh fuck off.'
'Make me.' Lynx shook his head and threw his hands up in exasperation at both Wolf and Celestia.

"Ok, fine Celly. But only because Spitfire has been pressuring me to hang out with her."
Celestia grinned even wider. "Oh I'm sure that isn't the only reason..." Lynx blushed slightly.

"Later Celly." With that, Lynx rushed out the door and headed for ponyville, leaving Celestia to deal with her royal duties.

Apon Leaving the castle, Lynx was stopped by Flashstorm, who said a certain Lieutenant wanted to apologize. Lynx sighed.

'Damnit, this day just won't end!' Lynx thought.
Flying with Flashstorm, they caught up with Striker and 1st Lieutenant Silver Bit. Night Striker waved the two over.

"Afternoon Captain." Lynx and Flashstorm said in unision, saluting. Night Striker waved their salutes down. Then he faced lynx.

"Sorry to cut you off from leaving, but Silver Bit here owes you an apology."
Silver Bit stepped forward and saluted Lynx. "Seargent Shadow, I would personally like to a-" Lynx stopped him with an open palm. The ponies all raised an eyebrow.

"Look Silver, I am not who you should be apologizing to, you need to apologise to the all of enlisted ranks. I don't accept your apology untill you do so. That understood sir?"

Silver Bit lowered his head. "Yes Sgt."
"Good." Lynx turned to Night Striker, and saluted. "Permission to leave sir?" Night Striker nodded.

"Granted."
Lynx then turned to Flashstorm. "You want to head home with me or do you have things to do?"

Flashstorm shrugged.

"Sorry, i have to do some paperwork. I'll see you tomorrow in Ponyvile for morning PT."
Lynx nodded, then jumped, spead his wings, and began to ascend through the afternoon's orange sky, leaving Canterlot.

Lynx took a long deserved breath, and glided though the clouds, feeling the cool air rush through his feathers. Relaxing a bit, Lynx turned over and started to spin, tucking in his wings, making him spin faster, then he closed his eyes, and breathed in. Just about when he would hit the ground, he snapped open his eyes, opened his wings, and thrusted downwards with his wings, making him shoot upward through the sky, slightly grimacing, as his wings strained against the wind and pressure. Beating his wings to stay aloft, Lynx breathed in and out, calming the adrenaline rush that hit him. A voice behind him made it hype up again.

"I see that move i taught you is working for you."
Lynx whipped arround, instinctively pulling out the sword across his back. He found himself face to muzzle with a yellow pegasus with different shades of sunset orange hair. Her hair was slicked down, like she took a shower, reaching the bottom of her neck. Her eyes were a light orange, matching the colors of her body. She was looking a little irratated. Lynx's sword was mere inches away from piercing her stomach.

"Ya wanna put that sword away, Seargent?"
Lynx sighed and put his sword sliding back into his sheath.

"Ya scared the crap out of me Spits!"
Spitfire frowned. "Why did you have to give me that name..." Lynx smiled.

"Oh come on, you know you like it."
Spitfire hurrumphed. "What ever Seargent." Her eyes lit up again. "So...Celestia says that you're going to the gala...that true?" Lynx pouted.

"Yeah, but only beacause that's the only time i will be able to hang out with you."
Spitfire smiled. "About damn time." Lynx grinned and gave a mock look of suprise while covering his mouth.

"Oh...cussing in Uniform, Captain? My, My, My, off to the brig with ya!"
Spitfire rolled her eyes and slugged him in the shoulder. "Oh shut up. At least I'm not the one that's been abandoning his friends..." Lynx shrugged.

"Not my fault that i keep getting missions."
"You could deny them." Lynx snorted.

"No, princess' orders, and the fact that i would leave my Battle Buddy all alone too? We both know Soarin would kill me if i left him hanging."
Spitfire rolled her eyes and shook her head. "I still don't know how you two became such good friends."

Lynx smiled. "Combat and death changes peo- i mean ponies."
Spitfire nodded with a sad look in her eyes. "Well, i have to head back, they'll be looking for me."
Spitfire hovered and began to fly off, then hesitated and turned her head with a sultry look on her face. Lynx raised a brow. "Let me know when you are back in canterlot again, we could always hang out before the gala...perhaps do something a little more...exciting..." A seductive smile played on her lips as she flicked her tail to the side and wiggled her rump playfully. Lynx stared on with wide eyes. Lynx couldn't hide the heated rosy blush on his face as he gaped at the sight. Spitfire laughed and flew off, leaving a confused Lynx hovering in the sky.

"Uh..."
'She likes you Lynx. She wants to fuck.'

"No...I'm pretty sure she was just teasing..."
'You are so hopeless.' Lynx flew back on course to ponyvile. Light was fading fast.

"What do you mean I'm hopeless?" Lynx asked, performing a barrel roll, smashing a cloud to bits.
'Dude, she said lets do something more exciting and shook her ass with a seductive grin. How much more obvious can she get!?'

Lynx thought about this. He and Spitfire had been friends since baisic training. Celestia made the guard and wonderbolts take the same training to combine the two...(branches?)'s abilities, thus making the guard more experienced with airiel combat. Spitfire and Lynx had hung out from time to time, especially when Twilight was in heat, and Lynx had to stay someplace else for his own safety. Spitfire was always welcoming, of course she was demanding at times but hey, Lynx didn't care. As the years passed since basic, Lynx and Spitfire had less time to spend with each other, due to Spitfire' s duties as the wonderbolt's Captain, and with Soarin and Lynx getting more involved with Celestia's problems.

Lynx began to near ponyville as the last rays of sunlight began to fade away. Lynx landed swiftly onto the ground near Sugarcube corner. A few ponies greeted him as he walked through the town, heading to Twilight's. As he reached the door of the library, he found himself suddenly being dragged into the library by a purple aura. He was dragged right to the hooves of Twilight, who looked beyond pissed.

'You might want to play this cool Lynx...'
'No shit sherlock.'

Lynx gulped before speaking to the angry mare.
"H-hey...Twilight...how was your day?" Her eye twitched slightly as she glared at him with her lavender colored eyes. Lynx shifted his feet. She sighed and said sarcastically:

"Oh i don't know, how does getting abandoned by your best friend sound? Does that sound good?"
"I had-" Twilight cut him off. She paced back and forth, her tail flicking from side to side in aggravation.

"Or when all of your New friends fight over who gets a ticket to go to the gala, and they all have extremely good reasons to go, and you can only take one of them?"

"Twi-" Lynx started, only to get cut off. Again.
"Or when-"

"TWILIGHT!" Lynx shouted out. Twilight shut up. Lynx sighed. "Look, i haven't been having the best day either, but it worked out for you right?"

"Yes...we all got tickets to the gala." Twilight said with a slightly icy tone.
"Ok, so stop complaing, please." Lynx turned away from her and took his sword and sheath off of his back, and put it on one of the tables near the bookshelf. Lynx put his head down on the table to gather his thoughts. Twilight walked up next to him, still giving him a icy glare. Then she put a hoof to her chin in thought.

"Oh yeah, Rainbow Dash and Thunderlane said to meet them later on, they wanted to show you something." Lynx sighed. He looked outside the window. The moon was slowly rising.

"How much later?"
"Like in twenty minutes." Lynx groaned.

"ok. I'm taking a shower. Where do they want to meet?"
Twilight put a hoof to her chin again, more focused this time. "I think they said near Sugarcube corner, i am not totaly sure." Lynx nodded and before she could say anything else, Lynx headed towards the shower, ready to relax and cool off.

Refreshed after his shower, Lynx put his uniform back on and slipped the sheath on his back. Lynx flared his wings out, fitting them through the holes of his shirt.
'Damn. Shoulda grabbed some clothes when I was in canterlot...'
Walking out of the bathroom, he found Spike and Twilight in their beds, sleeping. Lynx smiled.

"Good...while the cat's away, the mice begin to play..."
'That was a horrible reference. Plus you said it wrong.'

Lynx ignored wolf as he walked out of the library, and shut the door behind him, heading down to sugarcube corner. Looking around apon arrival, Lynx didn't see his two pegasus buddies, so he decided to head inside of Sugarcube Corner and grab a bite to eat. Lynx was greeted with the mouth watering scent of many sweet aromas and cake batter. As he walked in, Lynx saw nopony, but a shift in the air warned that a certain pink pony would try and suprise him. Grinning, Lynx whipped around, catching the pink pony with his hands and yelling:

"Suprise!" Pinkie Pie fell backwards out of his grasp and laughed.
"Nice one Lynxy! You got me!" Lynx fist pumped the air. Looking at pinkie, he kneeled down and grinned.

"Eeyup. So you have any idea where Rainbow and Thunder are?" Pinkie Pie giggled.
"Of course silly, They're trying to sneak up on you!" Sure enough, lynx was tackled to the ground by a cyan blur. Lynx's face slammed into the floor, and he growled as a weight sat on his back, right between his wings, making him struggle to get up. 700 push ups really gets to you, so Lynx couldn't push up with his arms due to the added weight. Sighing, Lynx gave up and relaxed and the weight on his back lightened, and a lighter sensation went to his wings.

"So...when did you get these hm?" A triumphant Rainbow dash asked, as Lynx sat up, glaring at her. Thunderlane grinned widely at Lynx.

"Yeah i don't remember you having these 6 years ago..." Both Pegasi ran a hoof through Lynx's large wings, making him shiver at the touch. Glaring at the two, Lynx smacked the two in the muzzle with his wings and folded them up again.

"If you must know, Celestia and Twilight gave me these for my birthday." The two pegasi gasped.
Lynx smirked at their surprise. Rainbow Dash shook her head then grinned.

"Well I bet you can't use them as well as me!" Thunderlane rolled his eyes. Lynx smiled.
Rainbow Dash stepped closer to Lynx, flaring her wings out. Lynx raised a brow.

"Is that a challenge?"
Rainbow Dash smirked.

"So what if it is?" Lynx flared his wings, slightly hitting Pinkie Pie in the muzzle.
"Then i accept!" Thunderlane face palmed and Pinkie pie ushered all of them out, and pulled out popcorn out of no where, leaning on Thunderlane.

"Ooh this is going to be goooood!"
Thunderlane sighed.

"Sorry pinkie, but this little challenge is going to have to wait. Rainbow Dash, remember that promise we made?" Lynx raised a brow and Rainbow Dash cursed.

"Ah horsefeathers, you're right. C'mon Lynx!" Rainbow grabbed Lynx by the arm and rushed down the street, Thunderlane flying close by. Lynx wriggled out of Rainbow's grip and slowed down.

"The hell's up with you guys today?" Lynx asked looking at his two friends. Thunderlane rolled his eyes.

"Just follow us." Lynx sighed and followed the two, while looking around at the familiar scenery. A few seconds later, they stopped in front of a house that seemed extremely familiar to Lynx, but he couldn't place why. The two pegasi grinned.

"Look Familiar?" Rainbow Dash asked, gesturing at the house. Lynx thought hard but nothing rung a bell. Before Lynx could respond, a shadowy figure slowly decended down towards the group.

"He better, after all, he grew up here...."
When the figure finally landed and look Lynx in the eye, Lynx Gasped.

"L-Lightning!"
Lightning grinned as he approached Lynx and his friends. "Who else?"

Lynx shook his head as he brought his surrogate father into a mighty hug/tackle. The pegasus wheezed as the air escaped his lungs. Rapping his hoof on Lynx's shoulder quickly made Lynx let go of him and let him breathe.

"Sweet Celestia kid, you've gotten stronger! Ya almost killed me there!" Lightning said, coughing.
Lynx shrugged. "The guard kinda does that to people."

Lightning nodded. "So I see..." Rainbow Dash and Thunderlane nudged the older pegasus.
"So...can we eat, or are we going to spend the whole night out here?" Rainbow Dash asked with a smirk.

Lightning chuckled. "Always one for food eh Rainbow?"
Lynx's stomach growled. Scratching his head, Lynx laughed. "I dunno Lightning, I'm hungry too!"

The older pegasus grinned. "I see...but first...I do believe one of your very best friends has been waiting for you to come home for a long time..."

Lynx furrowed his brow. "But who-" A large smile crept up on Lynx's face as a furry, grey wolf bounded toward him.

"SCRUFFY!"