The Man with the Hidden Past

Author's Notes: I'd like to thank Darkclaw Deathstrike for his help with this story. -creepy name, I know- But seriously. He was a big help, and I would just like to say this. "Everypony... please annoy the shit out of him. It's funny as hell." That is all.

"I have no idea what the hell is going on here." I said looking around. It was just some sort of black void. No floor, walls, ceiling... Nothing at all.

"Hm. So this is death. I always wondered what that would be like." I said.

"Hello!!!" I said. I listened for the echo and didn't hear it.

"Hello, wruth kiir.; Hello, my child."

"Yeah... creepy voice speaking in dragon coming out of nowhere... Seems Legit."

"Daar los ni hin tiid.; This is not your time."

"Hey mystery voice, I speak perfectly fine English you know. Dovah may be fun and all, but English is kinda easier to understand." I said as I started to spin. I think.

"Ah yes... You mortals are quite picky arn't you. But this is not the time to answer quetions. I offer you immortality right now. All you have to do is make a choice." Mystery voice said.

"Yeah, ok. Sure, what choice do I have to make?" I asked. "I'm going crazy. I just know it." I thought.

You have to choose between the world you wish to stay in for the rest of your life, Equestria, or Earth. Only one world will give you immortality."

"Fuck Earth. I choose Equestria. All earth has to offer me right now is people thinking I'm crazy and the same thing over and over." I said crossing my arms.

"You have chosen correctly. I grant you immortality. Have fun living for eternity." Mystery Voice said with a hint of sarcasm.

"I just done fucked the hell up." I though as suddenly the black void around me turned white in the blink of an eye. It stayed like that for a minute or two and then faded to a black again. This time I could regognize it though. It was the back of my eye lids.

"The fuck? I didn't close my eyes..." I thought. I slowly opened one and looked at my surroundings.

"I'm in a box." I said to myself. "And a closed one at that."

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"HOLY SHIT! THEY FUCKING BURIED ME!" I yelled. I then relized something. My chest didn't hurt. I quickly looked at where Celestia stabbed me only to hit my head on the top of the box.

"Ok... Looks like I'm gonna have to get out of here. Hm... How to do this..." I said as I wondered about what to do. Then I remembered I was immortal now. I could just use a Thu'um to blast the top of the box off and then dig my way out from that.

"FUS RO DAH!"

I heard an audible crack of wood and feel dirt fall on top of me. I used my arms to sheild my face. Once I felt the dirt stop falling I moved my arms. I could see the sky. It was mid-day. "FUCK!" I thought. "NOW I'M GONNA HAVE TO DEAL WITH PEOPLE SCREEMING 'ZOMBIE! RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!'"

I sat up and brushed the dirt off my pants. "Poor pants. They where nice ones too." I said. I then remembered my chest. I looked at the wound and saw that it was gone. I patted the area where it was to see if there was any soreness or bruises. None. "Awesome." I said to myself. I started to stand up and caught something out of the corner of my eye. Well, not exactly something. More... somethings...

And they where all staring at me. "Yo what up guys? Long time no see." I said as I got out of the crater my Thu'um made and walked over. "Being immortal certainly has its benifets. I can't feel any pain from the Thu'um!" I thought. They all ran or fainted when I got near them. All exept two. A rainbow maned pegasus and a orange earth pony with a stetson.

"What are Ya'll and what did you do tah Paul's body?!" AppleJack said as she got into an attack position. Rainbow however was slowly flying closer to me. I kept my attention on AppleJack.

"Listen AppleJack. I am Paul, and you wouldn't stand a chance against me." I said as I stretched out my wings. Must have been intimadating because she took a step back.

"Ah don't beleive ya. Now put Paul's body back in the grave and git outa here!" she yelled as she prepared to buck me. I gave a small snicker.

"Go ahead and try to attack me. I'll win. Just remeber what happened to the gaurds." I said. She looked like she was about to high-tale it out of here now. Instead, she ran right at me. When she was close, she turned on a complete 180 and tryed to buck me. Exept I had grabbed one of her legs mid-buck and used the momentum to throw her into a tomestone. She slowly got back up and looked like she was about to run at me again when Rainbow interupted.

"STOP!" She yelled. Then she looked at me in the eyes. "Is it really you?" she asked me.

I cocked an eyebrow. "No, I'm a fucking hummingbird. Moo." I said.

"Oh my gosh! It really is you!" she yelled before wrapping her hooves around me and gave me a kiss on the lips. I was shocked that she even hugged me, but kissing me over did it. I let my more energetic side of me take over. Suddenly, I had the sudden impulse to go see Pinkie. I broke the kiss and started to flap my wings.

"COME ON! I'LL RACE YA TO SEE WHO FINDS PINKIE FIRST!" I yelled before taking off. I flew around town about 3 times before seeing her tail duck behind cover.

"Ah ha! Found you!" I said before I sped up to catch her. "Whatcha doin' Pinkie?" I asked when I was flying by her side.

"Running from you!" She said cheerily.

"Why?" I said with slight worry in my voice.

"Because, I just saw you blow a hole out of your grave and then come right at us!" She said still running.

"Hey, do you know where the others are?" I asked.

"Yeah! Twilight's hiding in her basement, Rarity's in her boutique, I'm right here, Fluttershy fainted so Rarity took her with her. And Dashie and AJ stayed behind!" she said with a smile.

"Ok, thanks Pinkie!" I said before I took of towards what I thought was the boutique. That's when I started to think things through again. "What the fuck just happened?" I thought going through my memories of the last couple minutes. "Oh yeah. Rainbow kissed me and I went crazy for a while." I said to myself. After a while I arrived at Rarity's place. I gave a couple knocks and waited.

"Who is it?" I heard Rarity call from inside.

"Umm... Morning Rise?" I said changing my voice slightly.

"Oh! I never heard of you before! You must be new here. I'll be right there." I heard her say. "Damn. If a terrable name like the one I just made up exist... Imagin what worse ones there are." I thought to myself. "Wait. Why am I waiting at the door? I could just go in through a window." I said to myself. I spread my wings and flew up to the second floor. I heard the door open and quickly hid in a shadow. I used the shadow to scilently get inside. I then stayed in the shadows until I could make sure Rarity was gone. After I was sure, I slowly stepped into the middle of the room. I closed my eyes, cleared my head, and slowed my breathing. And listened. I heard a pony shuffling on something in the room to my right, a pony sleeping upstairs, and Rarity complaining to herself that nobody was at the door. I decided to check the room to my right first.

I calmly walked over to the door carfully walking to make sure my shoes didn't make noise. I put my ear to the door to listen better. Crying. I could only make out muffled parts of it.

"No... couldn't have... wouldn't do such a thing!"

After a couple minutes, it died down and turned into a slight snore. I quietly opened the door to see Fluttershy lying in a bed thrashing around in her sleep. "Must be having a nightmare." I thought. I walked over by the bed and sat down next to Fluttershy. I gently pulled her over next to me and pet her mane.

"Should probably get this cut better." I said quietly when I noticed that the part of her mane I cut off wasn't fixed yet. Me petting her was slowly calming her down though. Then, I remembered what my mother used to hum when I was having a nightmare. "Hell. Why not?" I thought before I started to sing Amazing Grace. By the time I was done, I was on the verge of tears.

"The hell. Why does this song do this to me." I said to myself as I wiped the tears away.

I felt Fluttershy move slightly. I looked down and saw that she had woken up. Her eyes where fill with something. It was like a bunch of emotions at once. Admiration, love, sadness, longing, and happyness all at the same time just to name a few.

"What. The. Fuck." I thought as I studied her eyes. They where like a puzzle that was impossible to solve. "Damn women. Why can't they ever be easy to understand like us guys?" I said in my head.

After a little while of just stareing, Fluttershy looked away and blushed.

"I-I didn't know you sang..." she said.

"Hm? Yeah... I do that sometimes. Apparently I'm pretty good at it." I said looking at the ceiling.

"Um... do you mind singing to me again? I really enjoyed it." Fluttershy said looking back up at me and cuddling a bit closer to me.

I couldn't help but chuckle a little. "Sure Fluttershy." I sat there for a little while thinking of a song to sing. Eventually I thought of one that I thought would fit the situation. After about half the song was done, I noticed that Fluttershy had fallen asleep again with a content smile on her face. I gently set her head on the pillow and got back up and stretched. I felt the satification of my back cracking multiple times. After that, I quickly cracked me neck. I must admit, it was louder than I expected it to be. Rarity must've heard it because I heard her start to quickly walk up the steps. I have a quick half-smile as my plan started to form. And it was time to put it in action. I walked over to the door and waited to hear Rarity's hooves on the floor. After I heard it, I opened the door and quietly closed it. Then I walked over to the window and opened it. I looked back and saw Rarity standing there. Frozen in horror shock. I put my finger to my lips.

"Shh... Fluttershy's a sleep." I said with a smile and jumped out the window. I landed quietly on the ground and stood back up.

Mental Checklist of Plan:

Scare Rarity: Check.

Goof Off: Not-check.

Visit Celestia Singing Trolololol: Next.

Go get some food because I haven't eaten since before I got here: Before I go see Celestia.

On my way to the market to get some food, I saw Pinkie being random again. And being the musical guy I am, it reminded me of a song. I ended up singing it under my breath on my way to the market. I was careful Twilight wouldn't see me. Didn't want to ruin Celestia's suprise more than it already is. On my way there, everyone would stop and stare at me, or run inside a random house and lock the door. When I got to the market it was already deserted of everyone. So, I just simply walked over to a stand full of apples and grabbed two and kept walking. I ate one apple while I walked, and tossed the other up in the air repeatedly.

"Damn. 'Dis a good apple!" I said as I ate it. Eventually I got out of the town while laughing a couple times at people's reactions of me. Gotta say though. One was kinda fucked up. Soon after I got the apples, Some mint green unicorn ran up to me and asked me a bunch of questions about my hands. Ended up with me asking if I needed to bitch-slap a unicorn. Poor thing said yes. I chuckled at the memory. Who in their right mind would say 'Yes'?

By the time I was finished with the second apple I was about half way to the palace. I decided that I wouldn't make it there before night and just decided to fly. I quickly broke the sound barrier and sped to the Palace. One there, I flew around a couple of the towers and looked for Celestia's bed room. After I found it, I made note of where it was. Then, I flew down to the city below and found a store that sold paper and quills.

"Hope I know how to use these things." I said as I took a quill and dipped it into an ink well. Then I went over to the paper and started to write.

"Dear Princess Celestia,

I have a suprise for you. I woun't wait forever either. I'll be right outside your palace.

Sincerly,

The one that you 'killed'"

I then grabbed the letter and flew back to the tower with Celestia's bedroom. I folded the paper into an airplane and threw it right at her head. Then, I went down to the steps of the palace and began my show.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, I am proud to anounce a show just for Celestia. I shall begin once she gets here!" I yelled to everyone I could see. Eventually, I saw Celestia slowly fly down with a look of anger on her face.

"Ah! There you are. Ahem... TROLOLOLOLOLOL"