The Man with the Hidden Past

I fucked up and up Chapter 6 here before. So I fixed it. Sorry for confusion. I just lied too. I don't give a fuck if you where confused.

Twilight quickly raised her hoof. She had a certain look in her eye. "Fuck. This is gonna take forever if she asks all of those." I thought.

"Ok, just because I can see how many questions Twilight over here has," I said, looking in her direction,"one question per pony please."

Twilight looked disappointed at that. "But why only one?" She asked.

"Because I said so. And that was your one question by the way, who's next?"

"I would like to please."

"Shut up Celestia, if you want to ask me something, get the fuck over here."

"Fine, you don't need to be so rude."

"I'm still not the one that dropped you from above tree level."

"Your gonna hold that against me arn't you?"

"Fuck yeah I am."

Meanwhile, while I was talking with Celestia, Twilight was looking sad, Rainbow looked like she was about to burst laughing, AppleJack just sat there confused, Rarity was joining AppleJack in on the act, and Pinkie Pie was, well, being her.

"NONONO WAIT!" Was all they heard me say before they where all in the Palace.

"HEY! I said for you to go there. Not us here." I said.

"Well what's done is done right? Pa-"

"NO! Don't say my name. If you do, you'll never see me again. And you'll probably gain a hat. Man, I love making hats. Mainly all the materials I can make them out of." I said, looking at all the ponies in that room.

"You wouldn't." Celestia said in shock.

"You appear to have forgotten my past Celestia." I stated.

"How did you..." she said, shocked my what I said.

"Yeah, like I couldn't notice. Why else would I think I had that flashback back on my way to ponyville?"

"Hehe... Oops?" She said looking guilty.

"Fuck yea 'oops'!"

"Yal don't need to talk like that ya know." AppleJack said behind me.

"Yeah, tell me that when I give a fuck. So, now that we're here, what did you want to ask Molsestia?" I said, with a sly grin on my face.

"I'll talk to you about what you said later, but I was wondering this, Why did you do what you did for your, erm... job?"

"I did what I did, for many reasons. But mainly because I felt the natural duty as a man to watch over others and make sure they where safe. And doing what I did kept people safe. I also was able to watch my father for my mother, she would over react a lot. And that also caused her end. As soon as she found out about my father, she was just a husk of her old self. I decided giving her some time was best and when I got back from my job I bought a house and soon got into a relationship. I can't say that went very far though."

"Oh." Was all she said after that.

"Well, since you're all asking questions now, Yo Celestia, you got a taller chair? That couch at Twilight's was terrable."

"Yeah, I heard."

"You seriously need to get out of my head. Or else I'll have to start thinking of some things that would make you want to rip off your ears."

"Like what?"

I looked at her with an amused smile. I started thinking of the catchiest thing I could think of. TEN FUCKING HOURS OF JACK SPARROW SINGING "I Got a Jar of Dirt"

She got a look of amusment at first.

"Yeah, it starts off funny, just wait a while. I dare you."

It didn't take long. She gained a face of annoyance, and then anger, and all the while I was laughing my ass off at her reactions to the annoying song.

"Want me to stop? Because I can always think of worse ones." I said, with a grin of my face.

"Oh please do! This is annoying me greatly!" She quickly said.

"Stop what Princess?" Twilight asked.

"My Dear Twilight, be happy you can't hear this man's thoughts." she said looking at her student with a look of jelousy.

"You really want to know?" I asked Twilight.

"NO!" Celestia quickly yelled before Twilight could say anything.

"That bad huh?" Rainbow Dash said.

"You have no idea." I said. "Even I don't want to be in my head."

"I still know your there Celestia, and I'll cut you a deal. I woun't think of any more annoying music and I'll let you stay in my head, but in exchange I want 3 things." I thought, not wanting the girls to know about this.

"And what might they be?" Celestia said in my head.

"One, is a trip back to my world for some more stuff, and they'll be big by the way. REAL BIG. Two, is some kick ass wings, I'll make a picture of what I would like them to look like later, and three is this, I want some magic. And don't say you can't do it. I know you move the fucking sun."

"Fine...." Celestia said, sounding like she just had to do something she hated.

"Awesome." I said.

"What is?" Twilight asked.

"Hey, you already asked your one question. So once again, who's next?"

Rarity raised her hoof.

"Do you know much about fastion?" she asked.

"Should I tell her about my job's fastion or my world's fastion?" I though looking at Celestia.

"World's preferably."

"No, no I don't. I don't give a fuck about what I look like." I said.

"Oh." Rarity said. She clearly looked dissapointed.

"Now who?" I said, ignoring Rarity's feelings.

Fluttershy was next.

"Do you like animals?" She asked.

"Typical" I though.

"Yes. I love them. They're great for having for dinner."

"So you invite animals over for dinner?" Pinkie asked.

"No..." I said. "And thats counts as your question too."

"So who's next?"

Rainbow raised her hoof next.

"Why can you take your eye out?"

"You can do that?" Celestia asked in my head.

"Be quiet Celestia, you already asked your question."

"Fine, but don't tell her exactly how it happened."

"Fine I woun't." I said.

"You gonna answer me?" Rainbow asked.

"Hey, you already asked your question. But yeah, I'll tell you. I accidently got something in my eye and I had to get a fake eye to replace the old one.

"Happy now?" I thought.

"Very." Celestia said.

"Ok, and all thats left now is AppleJack. So lets hear it farmgirl." I said looking at her.

"So why exactly do ya carry 'round that shiny thing?" She asked.

"One, is because this," I said, holding up a fist," May be able to break some walls, but this" I said, unsheathing the knife, "can break anything that lives, me, you, and even you beloved leader over there." I said, pointing you Celestia.

"But if you don't give me a reason to use it, you'll never see it used against you. Unless you wake me up like Rainbow wanted me to wake you girls up with. If thats the case, you better hope that I miss."

"What are the chances that you do?" Rainbow Dashed asked.

"Great, I can already tell this one is gonna try it. Poor thing, It's gonna be slow for her."

"Rainbow, I know what your thinking, and trust me. He just thought of what your going to do too. And you should never think of doing it again." Celestia warned.

"But he didn't answer me."

"You don't want to know." She replied.

"No, no. It's fine." I said.

"I know you hate math. But I'll tell you this. This knife right here," I said, spinning the tip on my finger," has met exactly 548 people. And none lived the next day."

"Ouch." I quickly said. The tip had cup my finger and I accidently dropped the knife. The knife fell on the floor and stuck in the floor.

"Stange, this floor is made out of stone." Celestia said.

I sighed. "Well, then it looks like you take terrable condition of it, because now my knife is stuck in it, probably went through a crack under the carpet, and now I'm gonna have to put it away, mainly because I don't want to prick another finger."

"So!" I said, trying to break the scilence that happened after I put away the knife. "I've already answered your questions, and I don't have any because I don't give a fuck, what do we do now?"

"Well, we could consider getting you a job." Celestia said.

"Ok sure, but nothing involving what I did before. I've had enough of that for now. Maybe something where I can still get excersize though. I need to stay fit or else I'll get into the habbit of being lazy. And nothing that involves baking. I hate it." I heard something like a baloon popping. I turned to look at the noise and found a sad, depressed Pinkie Pie there.

"Whoa. Damn Pinkie, do you have like, your own laws of physics or something?"

"No sir."

"Great. Just what I need. More people calling me 'Sir'." I though.

"But yeah, any suggestions on a job?"

"What about AppleJack's farm?" Twilight asked.

I looked over at AppleJack and she looked worried.

"Nah, I can tell she don't like me much. Just look at her, she looks like she's about to run and hide so I can't see her."

AppleJack blushed and looked down. I laughed slightly.

"Well, I guess I could use some help around the library..." Twilight said.

"She totally just wants to ask me more questions." I thought.

"No, but thanks anyway. I'll probably just go off into the woods and make a house."

"Out of what?" Twilight asked.

"Oh, I don't know... Out of trees maybe?" I said.

"Think she'll take the hint?" I thought.

"Hopfully. Even I'm getting annoyed by her questions." Celestia said in my head.

"Oh yeah, that reminds me, is there a way to let other people into my head? I'm kinda curious." I thought.

"Yes actually, I've made it so all you have to do is focus on someone else and you can form a bond with their mind to let you talk."

"But I didn't focus on you, why are you in my head then?" I thought.

"I focused on you. It works both ways kinda. But I had formed the bond on your way here."

"So, lets say, Rainbow Dashed focused on me, she could get in my head without me knowing?" I thought.

"No, you would have to agree to the bond. You had accepted my bond while you where in your house."

"When? I don't remember doing anything." I thought.

"Oh well, we'll figure it out later."

"Whatever". I thought.

"Ok Celestia, Just teleport us all back to the giant tree library." I said.

"My house?" Twilight asked.

"Yeah, sure. Why not." I replied.

And with that, we where all in Twilights Library, Everyone but Celestia.

"Ha. She forgot about our talk." I thought.

"No I didn't. I was waiting for my gaurds to leave the room. I'll see you in a little bit."

"Fuck." was all I said, as I walked over to Twilight.

"So, you really want in my head eh?" I asked.

"Oh yes! I could learn a lot about different species think!"

"Ok... but once you do in, theres no way that I know of out." I warned

"Oh, how bad could it be?" she said.

An with that, I focused on her. I noticed the world getting darker. It was almost turning purple. Wait, it was! It was turning a shade of Twilights coat. I closed my eyes, and fell on the floor. Out Cold.