Might as Well Jump

I awoke the morning after killing that freak with an ear splitting headache. Usually the byproduct of a recent dimensional jump. I looked around, finding myself in a particularly gloomy forest during the dead of night. Usually the setting of a zombie movie. I heaved myself up and took a trial step, testing the ground around me.

snap

Yeah... That was a bone.

I stifled a gasp as I shone my fulton light upon the ground before me, hundreds of skeletons from litterally every era littering the ground. I saw romans, still in their bloody armor, elizibethan aristocrats, some in the tattered remains of their clothes, and weird neck thingies. Scots with clubs and kilts, patriots and red coats, confederate rebels and union officers, first and second world war soldiers of both sides, modern day adventurers and explorers, all dead and laid out reaching for an intricately carved stone pedestal, holding an equally intricate book.

I felt drawn towards it, yet the ones who'd fallen before me... I decided to investigate like that one fella, sherlock holmes.

"Hey pal, might wanna watch your step next time." An ominous voice called out from behind me. I whipped around, pointing my M4 towards the source of the voice.

"Whoa, calm down Charlie Brown! I'm on your side!" The speaker came out from behind a willow tree, hands in the air. He was a glowing man, about 6'3" with pale skin, and long black hair, brushed to one side, and oddly enough, shaved on the other. He was wearing combat boots, worn black jeans, a grateful dead shirt and a denim vest.

"What in the sam hell..." I started, lowering my rifle.

"Look, I know I'm offensively gorgeous, but no need to shoot me! I'm your guardian angel after all." He said, lowering his hands and giving me a 'take the bait' look.

"Guardian... Angel." I incredulously repeated as my weapon dropped to my side.

"Yep, you can call me Gabe." He said, whipping out a bussiness card and handing it to me.

Gabriel Peterson

Guardian angel

(Part time iPod repairman)

...

"What the Hell is an iPod?"