Broken, but Still Standing

Not every moment with Tavi was about sex. We had to work too, to pay for our needs. It's funny, come to think of it. Musicians, running from Celestia knows what, end up doing the only thing we know how to to make a few bits.

We made our debut as 'OctaScratch', I know right? We were instantly loved, and to this day I still can't understand how I let that gray mare with the lushes plot talk me into playing Viola in front of others again. But she did.

I might have been a little rusty, but it seemed that the rust only added to my unique style as I was asked by every filly and their mother to play for birthday parties and shindigs and all. Octavia took on more of the classical performances and earned the bigger bits, but I played much more often. In now time, a few weeks went by, and I didn't hear a thing from Derpy.

I doubted that she's send me letters about everything, as we were suppose to be going underground, but I did hope I'd hear something. And so I came back into the house one day feeling blue that I didn't hear anything from the mare who held my heart.

“Something wrong, V?” Tavi asked. I could tell by her tone she was content, but not playful. Maybe I could actually talk to her without fighting to keep her hooves off of me.

“Not really.” I admitted with a sigh. “I was just...”

“Just?” She was sitting at the table, reading something, probably just half listening to me.

“Just hoping I'd hear from Derpy.” Octavia, in a smooth, unhurried motion, put down what she was reading and looked up at me with pensive eyes. “It's been almost a month.” I told her, anxiaty chewing away at my innards. “I'm worried.”

“It's been three weeks.” Octavia corrected. “But yes, I understand what you mean.” She hesitated a moment. “Was...wasn't she suppose to come a week after us?”

“Yeah.”

I decided sitting was better suited for this conversation. As I sat down, Tavi turned around and pulled out a little bottle of scotch and two brandy glasses. I raised my eyebrows as as she poured us both a little, but settled with my forelegs on the table, playing with me glass while she lifted her's to her mouth and took a sip.

“Vinyl...Tell me, what do you love about Derpy?” Tavi asked after a long moment of silence. She blushed as I looked up. “I mean, I know you love her. As soon as she gets out here, you're going to leave me for her. I figure I might as well know more about this mare that stole your heart in such a way that I can't seem to steal it back.”

I gave a chuckle, taking a sip of the fiery liquid. “You haven't been subtle about it.” She blushed again, reminding me of Derpy for some odd reason. I set my glass down. “But, I have to ask why.”

She blinked in surprise. “Why...what?”

“Tav.” She wouldn't lock eyes with me. “Tavi.” She glanced up and quickly looked away. “You still thought you had a shot with me, didn't you?”

Her shoulders sagged, as if I had punctured some balloon that was in her chest. “I suppose I thought I did.” She sniffed. “It's just hard, letting you go like that. And after Barra...”

It clicked. “You didn't know he was gay until he broke it off.” I guessed. From the look of things, I was close enough to the truth.

Octavia started crying, but she just dried them up. “I'm sure we'll hear from Derpy soon. Then...” She gave a loud sniff, dried up her tears and fixed me with a winning smile of a pony who was trying to hold it all together. “Then we all can move on with our lives and be happy.”

Her words hit home. Move on with our lives. No more running, living in shit hole, having to scrape the bottom to get by. Just me, Derpy and the baby. She was due soon too. Oh colt, I wasn't sure if I was ready for a baby, but the little warm feeling in my chest told me I was.

After that, we chatted about things that weren't related. The days went by, and I just focused on my work, sleeping less and less with Tavi. I didn't want to hurt her, again, but I wanted to make it clear that I wasn't here for her body. Giving her more would only make Derpy's coming that more difficult on her. That's what I thought, until I got the letter.

Dear Vinyl,

Hey, I'm fine, so don't worry about me. I thought about all the things you've done for me, for my baby, and I feel so grateful for it. No other pony would have taken me in like that, and that makes you a special, kindhearted mare.

I know I was suppose to come out after a week of you leaving but...my mother got very ill. I'm sorry, but I can't come. I don't think I ever will. Please don't take it hard, but I don't think I can see you again. You have such a wonderful life, and I've caused so much trouble. I'm glad I could meet your dad, and your fiend Octavia. Please wish them the best for me.

With much love,

Derpy Hooves.

P.s. If I could, I'd love to see your Bright smile again. If live were different I'd Never Leave your side.

I stared at the letter, feeling every emotion crash on me at once. Derpy...Derpy wasn't coming. She was gone, gone forever from my life. I canceled my performances for the day. I must have threw up in the bathroom for an hour, bawling my eyes out over the fact that the one mare, the ONE BUCKING mare I chose to give my heart to in a way that I'd never thought I could, just gave me the stiff wing and walked away.

I read and reread the letter over and over again, hoping beyond hope that I had missed something. Surely there was code in these letters that told me something. But the more I read it, the more I saw it was how Derpy would have said things. Derpy did have a mother, and she very well could have been sick. She did cause me trouble, but she knew, she KNEW, I signed up for that, without reservation for that. She knew I'd never leave her side. She even said, if she could she'd see my bright smile. That she's never leave me.

I heard the front door open and Octavia call my name. With puffy eyes, I looked at the last two lines again, seeing something that my distraught brain couldn't handle at the time.

'If I could, I'd see your Bright smile. I'd Never Leave'

“Vinyl? Are you in the bathroom?”

'Bright...Never Leave...'

“Ah, there you are. Wh-Vinyl? Something the matter?”

Snot clogged my nose, as I looked up, tears still leaking from my red eyes. The way she looked at me. The way Octavia watched me, waiting for me to say something. My horn twitched, and my heart sank. She knew.

“Derpy...” Was all I could muster.

Octavia gave a hefty sigh, a mixture of relief, and pity. “At least you know now.” She told me gently, putting a hoof on my head. “I'm sorry Viola, but I didn't want to say something and assu-”

“Bright has her.” I cut in, jerking my head a little from her touch.

“Viola.” Octavia said gently, once again trying to brush my mane out of my face. “I get it. You're heart broken. But with sad ends come new beginnings.”

I shoved her hoof away. “No. Derpy's in trouble and I'm going to go get her!”

“Viola-”

“Would just shut your bucking trap for just one Celsetia damn minute, you fiddle playing, tantrom throwing, plot gaping, whore of a two bit musician?!”

Octavia stood stalk still, completely stunned at the words that spilled out of my mouth, like the most vial vomit that stank of petrification of what she really was.

“Look, I don't know how long you were going to keep me believing that you had my best interests in mind, but shove em up your Celestia damn cunt! I don't give a shit! My marefriend, whom I have every intention of marrying, is is trouble, and if you try and stop me, I'll kick your bucking teeth in!”

I knocked my shoulder hard into her as I passed her, making my way to the front door. The bathroom I exited was on the second story of the house, with a wide balcony over looking the first level next to the free standing winding staircase.

The hit from behind took my by surprise and sent me tumbling down every last stair. Octavia stood at the top, fear in her eyes, as she peered down at me getting up.

“Listen Viola, you can't go back.”

“Watch me.” I spat out, along with a glob of blood. I turned to make my way to the door when Octavia yanked me back by my tail. The gray mare had jumped the staircase and galloped to stop me. She pulled hard again, as I tried to give her jaw a good thump for pulling my tail, pulling me to the ground, so she could stand over me.

“Viola!” She looked desperate. “You CAN'T!”

I gave her a look of gross hatred. “Stop calling me that!”

I pulled in both hind legs and kicked out at her stomach, launching her off of me, into the dining table, spitting it in half neatly. She charged, but this time I was ready. Have you ever seen two ponies ave a boxing match? Strange to thinking, since we're on all fours most the time, but we can rear up and strike with our fore-hooves. Most the time it looks like walking in air, until you get two ponies who know what their doing. My dad, when I was younger, taught me how to fight. Looked like Octavia learned how to do a little scraping when she was becoming a police officer.

I threw the first punch, catching her in the jaw, but she countered with a hook to my side, following with a classic uppercut, but I had my guard up, so stopped it in it's tracks long enough to head butt her square in the nose. She took a step back to recover, which I used to do a faint jab to her face and follow with a cross to her chest, but she saw through that, and countered with a side step and landed a haymaker to my stomach. Instead of stepping back, I leaped forward, holding her as I doubled up, making it impossible for her to land any more hard body blows.

She tried smacking me in the back of the head, but I ignored them and held her tight, tensing my body. She didn't realize what I was doing until I, all at once, let all the tension go, launched myself with my legs and arched backwards, suplexing her to the floor, on top of a chair that was unlucky enough to be there.

“I'm going!” I shouted, wheezing.

“Do..don't.” Her whimpers were half of pain and half of something else I couldn't recognize. “P-pleas. Do-” I kicked her again in the head, knocking her out. I didn't want her to follow me, not without a head start at least.

I didn't even pause to get my breath. I just galloped through the door, muttering to myself, “Hang on Derpy! I'm coming for you!”