Hell in a Hoof-basket

Sigvatr the Sick was a well known figure back in the days of old. As sadistic Viking who shared no gold, no jewel... really nothing but pain. He did enjoy sharing that. He was so good at his skills in torture and murder that he became feared among the Netherlands and Newfoundland. So feared was he, that other Vikings felt it their duty to put an end to this mad man. So it was that Sigvatr the Sick was murdered by a group of men and women led by Ranog the Decent.

For hundreds of years Sigvatr dwelled in the deeper depths of Hell. Much like on Earth, he gained a fearsome reputation in Hell. Part of Satan's personal guard, he was the second in command for torture, and the number one guy you went to if you wanted to hurt someone badly. (Remember this is Hell, hurting someone that's gotten used to constant flames and misery is a rather hard feat.) He even invented one of the longest running mandatory greeting for Hell. "Kun kuoli, odotit hehkua. Nyt poltat täällä alla." (It got replaced by Reverend Earl Jefforson's "It's a damn shame you ended up here. Now you're a damned shame.") But there was one thing he did that was so infamous that it cemented his place in Hell, so that he could never leave, no matter how many good deeds he did, and no matter how many tasks he completed. And we'll let the characters tell you what that was when we get to it, because I just typed like two paragraphs of exposition-esque backstory.

In case you're wondering why we bring him up, well...

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Dirty Money returned to his usual hiding spot with his cronies. The mugging of that dumb Pegasus had left all four of them a little pissed off and frustrated. Not only did she have no money on her, but she had nearly broken the unicorn's horn off from a kick to the head. To top it off, he felt like he had a slight heart burn.

"I told ya she wouldn't have anythin on her!" the unicorn yelled. Dirty just snarled in his direction. He never cared for non-earth ponies. Unicorns always acted so smug and superior.

"Shurrup you dumb fool." spat the crimson pony next to him.

"Oh, I can't point out when I tried stoppin y'all from makin mules o yourselves?" he countered. Dirty felt his heart burn intensify a little bit as he thought about the nerve this new member of his gang had. Thinking about shoving his face into the ground didn't seem to help much.

They all sulked around a bit more as he browsed his surroundings. The same old small shack outside of Apploosa. It always made him bitter to see how well off the ponies were in town. What really infuriated him, though, was when a foreigner from a different town or city would come. Their very mannerisms would do all the bragging and showing off so they wouldn't have to go out of their way to say it.

Fuming over these events made his heart pound and burn like a steam engine. And then the straw flew from the unicorn's mouth with the sole purpose of breaking the metaphorical camel's back.

"Stupid Earth ponies can't do nothin' right."

And then Dirty Money spontaneously combusted.

...

No I'm serious, that's what happened. The pony was engulfed in flames as a roar of echoed from his mouth, sounding like a mix of windigo screech and manticor roar... and a hint of Sam Kinison yell.

His three companions all raced to the opposite end of the room, eyes wide in fear and confusion as their "friend" seemed to be burning to death. It lasted for about ten seconds before the flames extinguished in the blink of an eye. Dirty Money's body stayed frozen in its position, the only sign of change was the absence of pupils from his eyes. His face held a look of incredible suffering and agonizing pain. His every muscle jutted out like snakes underneath bed sheets.

The other three stayed stock still in their cowering positions, until the one I haven't bothered to describe yet broke the silence.

"What should we do?"

"Somepony needs to go see if he's breathin'." Replied the red stallion.

They both looked expectantly at the unicorn. With a bitter sigh, he stood and slowly made his way over to his catatonic acquaintance.

"Dirty, y'all right?"

The body didn't move an inch. The unicorn moved forward and extended a hoof. "Dir-"

"F*cking Satan."

The unicorn flinched at the sound of Dirty's voice. It seemed off. Raspier, colder, more detached.

"You alright?"

"Yeah. Am I a horse?"

The unicorn squinted his eye brows at the question and looked back to the two stallions in the corner of the room. They merely shrugged with their own dumb-founded faces. He looked back at Dirty and noticed his face seemed off. A little more twisted and pale. As if the fur on his face was actually changing color. His eyes also seemed to be changing color. The whites of his eyes were now a soft pink, and seemed to be darkening in a shade of red.

"Uh..."

"Yeah, yeah I am. Great. Wait, am I wearing boots?"

"Uh, yeah, you are."

"I have a knife in my boots."

"Um, yeah? Listen, I think you should lie down for a bit. Somethin musta went screwy with your hea-"

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Rising Wind stomped into the saloon with a grim expression on her face.

'Lousy minotaur, distractin me, makin me get mugged, kick him where I kicked the last bucker who messed with me'.

Her thoughts continued grumbling as she ordered a mug of cider and guzzled it down. She looked out the window to see the train was in town. She sniffed at it contemptuously and leaned her head back to drink. Once again the mug was empty and she went to order another. The saloon pony, whose name she never got around to learning, shook his head.

"Everypony knows the rule. After the tenth mug, ya gotta pay before you get your next ten."

The train's engine roared in the distance.

"Oh, alright mister."

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RW gasped for breath as she collapsed onto a seat in the train car. Her wings were burning from how fast she had been to get on the train. She smiled at herself. She'd always needed a good reason to leave. And now she was finally getting out of that terrible little nothing town. She sat up and looked around. Most of the other seats were empty. She stretched out her forelegs and yawned. A good night's sleep might bring a better day to her. She laid back down, head by the window and hind legs out by the aisle. She slowly closed her eyes.

"Good night, Miss Wind."

Her eyes bolted wide open as a familiar gangly navy colored figure appeared next to her seat. She closed her eyes, bent her knee and gave a powerful kick. A THUMP! and a slight moan of pain was all she needed to go to bed.