The Twilight Zone

Pinkie fondly remembered when she'd first built the party cannon. It was a small little thing that she had packed with self-inflating balloons and confetti, wrapped up in a table cloth. It allowed her to get parties ready in minutes. In those days, parties were all that mattered. Just having fun with family and friends, without a care in the world. These thoughts went through her head as she set the party cannon's sights on a Cinnamon Demon.

"Die, you monsters!" she roared as a jawbreaker cannonball ripped the head off her target. "Keep going Twilight! I'll keep them occupied!"

Twilight put the pedal to the metal, and the Cavity roared gleefully as it sped up. The purple unicorn found herself reflecting upon her situation. She was driving a war machine through a world made of candy while her crazy pirate-looking friend fired giant jawbreakers out of a cannon. The more she thought about it, the less sense it made. It had all felt completely real, and now she was realizing how ridiculous her situation was. It was obviously all a dream, but she didn't want to give the monsters chasing them a chance to prove her wrong. Twilight was too lost in thought to notice a winged beast swoop down on her.

"AAAAAAH! Pinkie! Help!" screamed Twilight as she was carried away.

"Dammit! Don't worry, Twilight! I'll come for you!" yelled Pinkie as she got behind the wheel again.

Twilight struggled against the bird that had captured her, but stopped when she realized how high up she was. She looked ahead and saw that she was being taken to the castle in the distance. Could the way back to the real world be there? If they decided to execute her, would she really die? Or what if they kept her as a prisoner there forever? Would she ever see her friends and family again? Twilight was left to imagine the worst as the castle loomed ever closer.

~

The sun was high when they finally reached the castle. The bird released Twilight with a thud, and a group of gingerbread soldiers dragged her inside. The interior of the castle had been painted a creamy yellow and decorated with a candy theme throughout its halls. The soldiers dragged her to the castle's main hall, where a pair of thrones awaited her at the far end. Sitting on the left was a tall, lanky, ghostly white stallion with a green mane, dressed in a purple suit with a fur coat that made him seem bigger than he probably was. On the right was a short, stout, grayish-pink mare with a red and black mane, wearing a snug red and black bodysuit.

"Well, a healthy pony. And a unicorn, no less! This truly is a magnificent catch, wouldn't you agree, honey bun?" said the stallion with a tone in his voice that made it obvious he felt superior to Twilight.

"Oh yes dear, I've just been dying for more volunteers. Those soldiers from the last siege didn't last two days!" said the mare. It was then that Twilight finally recognized these ponies' voices and realized just who they were.

"Mr. and Mrs. Cake! What happened to you?!" Twilight couldn't believe how different they looked. Had she imagined them this way too? Her thoughts were slapped out of her head by Mr. Cake's walking cane.

Twilight grunted with pain as the taste of blood filled her mouth. This was no dream. She spat as Mr. Cake used his cane to lift her head and meet her eyes with his cold gaze.

"The 'Cakes' are dead my dear. We are the Kanes. I am Sugar Kane, and this is my beautiful gum drop, Kandy." He said as he gestured to the pudgy pony sitting next to him.

"Oh, you always know just what to say Sugar-daddy..." Said Mrs. Cake with a baby-talk voice. Twilight sighed in disgust as they traded Eskimo kisses.

"Take her to the dungeon, we'll use her later..." commanded Mr. Cake.

The guards dragged Twilight down to the dungeon. The smell that came from inside as the doors opened nearly knocked her out. It was a nauseating mix of body odor and feces that made Twilight want to vomit. What really caused her to gag however, was the sight of the imprisoned ponies as she passed their cells. One pony was shaking in the corner of his cell, his hooves amputated and replaced with candy canes. A pair of ravenous foals were eating a mare in another cell, all three seemed to be in a zombie-like state. Twilight turned away from the sight to see a stallion wasting away into something that resembled pudding.

"Kill...me..." he groaned.

The guards opened one of the cells and threw Twilight in. They slammed the cell door and went on with their business. The moans and wails of pain from the other prisoners were haunting. She could still hear the pudding pony pleading for death, the sick chewing of the foals on what was probably their mother, and the shaking pony weeping on the other side of the dungeon. She was just glad that she had this particular cell to herself, and wasn't exposed to any dangerous test subjects. As Twilight turned around to survey the cell, she nearly had a heart attack when she was met face-to-face with a wide-eyed pony...statue?

No, it was a pony. Twilight studied her cellmate closely: it was a pony frozen in mid...vomit. She was throwing up when she solidified. Twilight inspected the floor in front of her to find a pool of liquid that had hardened as well. Upon closer inspection, the material this pony was made from resembled a mix of stone and bone. Twilight figured her cellmate probably tasted sweet, but didn't dare lick her to find out. Twilight also deduced that there was a very slim chance that the petrified pony was still alive. It pained her to think that this pony had suffered so much, and died with an expression of pure pain frozen on her face forever. Twilight felt sorrow as she touched a hoof to the pony's cheek, causing her to crumble away into dust.

"AAAH! I-I'm sorry!" Twilight plead to the mound of white dust on the floor. Now Twilight noticed the stone pony wasn't the only one in the cell, two more ponies were in there with her. One pony had been turned into gummy candy, and seemed to be in the process of tearing into her abdomen before the gummification took away her ability to move. This pony also died with a pain-filled expression.

The other pony was sitting up against a wall, still alive! This one was shaking and seemed to be freezing, even though the dungeon wasn't particularly cold. Twilight approached her cautiously. Now that she was closer, Twilight could see the pony's breath as if they were in a freezer. Each shaky breath was pitifully weak. The pony's eyes seemed to be glazed over, but they moved to see Twilight once she came into view. What could Twilight say? Obviously this pony wasn't "okay", so there was no use in asking if she was. Twilight didn't know if this pony's condition was reversible either. The dungeon wasn't cold, so the only explanation was that this pony was freezing from the inside-out.

Suddenly, the pony started shaking furiously as she lifted her hoof up and reached out to Twilight. The sounds of crunching frozen flesh and bone made Twilight's stomach turn, but she hesitantly reached a hoof out too. She touched the other pony's hoof, unsure whether she could feel her too. The other pony's hoof broke off in reaction to Twilight's touch and broke on the ground with a loud thud. Twilight's heart fell in despair as the thoughts of what the Kanes had planned for her crossed her mind. She joined the weeping chorus of the dungeon and sunk to the ground, unaware that her cellmate had stopped shaking.

~

Twilight was unable to tell how much time had passed. It might have only been minutes, but to her it felt like days had gone by. Several times, Twilight had thought of talking to her dead cellmates to distract herself from the dungeon's screams. But she knew doing so would only drive her into madness faster. Instead, she chose to talk to one of the only creatures that -ironically- had actually been helpful.

"...Discord...?" she whispered. "Can you hear me?"

Twilight waited for what would surely be a witty, sarcastic response. But nothing came, only the screams of ponies as they were taken away to become playthings for the Kanes. A tear escaped her eye as Twilight looked at the ponies around her, wondering what fate had in store.

"I just wanna go home..." she whimpered.

"But Twilight, I thought you were having fun." said a familiar, smug-sounding voice. Discord stood there holding his book, completely oblivious to the sounds of the dungeon.

"Discord, I just want this nightmare to be over! I want to return to my friends in Ponyville!" pleaded Twilight.

"Weren't you having fun blowing things up with Pinkie Pie?" he asked.

"Well, yes but what does that have to do with anything?"

"Well, maybe you don't want to leave."

"What are you talking about?! Of course I want to leave!"

"Hmm...It doesn't look that way to me. Otherwise, you'd be making more of an effort to get back, don't you think?"

Twilight thought about it. She had gotten carried away in Pinkie's candy world. She had felt so close to Pinkie Pie, she felt the sensation that she had never actually left the real world.

"You know you've been fooling around. Your mind is punishing you for slacking off and forgetting about your objective. If you keep it up, the Hands of Fate will come for you," Discord moved his face close to Twilight's and flicked her horn with his finger. "Don't let that happen."

Discord evaporated into thin air again, and Twilight saw Pinkie Pie walk up to her cell.

"...Pinkie?" said Twilight with uncertainty.

Pinkie used a hoof to tell Twilight to keep quiet as she spit out her chewing gum and pressed it against the cell door's lock. It inflated and exploded with a muffled pop, and Twilight hurried over to hug her friend.

"Sorry I took so long," whispered Pinkie. "Did they hurt you?"

"No, I'm fine." Twilight replied.

"Come on, let's get out of here." Pinkie led the way through the dungeon, only stopping to pry her dagger out of a very peaceful puddle of pudding.

Twilight and Pinkie ran through the halls of the castle through an open-air corridor, as the setting sun painted everything orange. That corridor had a breathtaking view of a soda waterfall, and walking through there would've been amazing if their lives weren't in danger.

"Long time no see, Pinkie Pie." sneered Mr. Cake at the end of the corridor.

"Kane..." growled Pinkie as they stopped. Twilight knew there was going to be confrontation, and she knew that without magic she would only get in Pinkie's way.

"I don't suppose you've reconsidered our offer to lead the Ninjabread Men?" said Mr. Cake.

"You know why I'm here," said Pinkie. "I'm not gonna let one of my friends become your newest test subject you maniac."

"Well...that's a shame." said Mr. Cake nonchalantly. "Kill 'em."

At Mr. Cake's command, a dozen gingerbread men flew out from behind him and pulled out their swords, ready to end Pinkie and Twilight where they stood.

In response, Pinkie pulled her candy cane sickle out of its huge scabbard behind her back and motioned for them to bring it on. The first one leaped straight at Pinkie, and she brought her sickle down on its head. She justified his death by telling herself that he probably wasn't using it anyway, charging her like that. She saw that the first ninja had been a diversion allowing the others to surround her. She pushed Twilight out of the way and spun her sickle to block their swords. She then pulled a baggy from her belt and dispersed a large amount of pink sugar around her. With each swing of her mighty sickle, the sugar moved and lengthened into webs. Twilight realized it hampered the ninja's movements and they realized it too.

Before they could cut through the pink webs around their feet, Pinkie swung her sickle around and above her head, creating a great whirlwind that dragged all the sugar around her onto her candy cane in a pink bundle of sugary webs. She looked smugly at Mr. Cake.

"Undercooked as usual, Kane."

"What did you think I wanted you for?" asked Mr. Cake "You always made them the best. Now that you see how badly we need you, will you join us?"

"No," said Pinkie as she threw a grenade at his face.

The explosion sent him reeling back, creating an opening for Pinkie to throw Twilight out into the main hall. As soon as she landed, she wished she was back in the corridor. Seeing what was waiting for her and Pinkie in the main hall made her cell in the dungeon seem like a safe haven. Pinkie jumped out into the main hall to join Twilight in witnessing Mrs. Cake with a very large hammer and a chain, riding a hulking beast of a mutated pegasus pony.

"Go get 'em, Coke baby," cooed Mrs. Cake. "Make mommy proud."

"Run, Twilight!" yelled Pinkie as she threw her grenades at the monster, only making it angry as it chased them out of the castle.

The Cavity was parked outside the castle, and Twilight wasted no time in jumping in the passenger seat as Pinkie got behind the wheel and turned it on. The giant pony roared out of the castle entrance, giving chase to the Cavity with the Cakes on its back. Pinkie drove out onto a bridge overlooking the soda waterfall, making it halfway across before the monstrous pony jumped ahead of them and stopped the Cavity in its tracks and allowed the Cakes to board her machine.

Mr. Cake pulled a sword out of his cane and clashed against Pinkie's dagger while she wrestled Mrs. Cake's giant hammer with her candy cane sickle, trying to keep Twilight safe. With a swift movement, Pinkie let her weight against Mrs. Cake's hammer go, ducking just in time for it to hit Mr. Cake square in the face. She grabbed his hoof with her own, and used her other hoof to block Mrs. Cake's returning hammer swing. In the same motion, she used Mr. Cake as a weapon against his wife and sent them both reeling onto the gargantuan pony that had stopped the Cavity. His full attention was on Pinkie Pie as he reared upon his hind legs and prepared to bring his unending beastly rage crashing down upon-

"NO POUND CAKE! WE DON'T POUND PINKIE'S TOYS!" Pinkie's command echoed over the sound of the waterfall, stopping the monster cold. "Or her friends...," she said as she moved over to her barrels of candy. "or their bones...."

Pinkie picked up one barrel and held it over her head, allowing its white powdery contents to cover her from head to hoof. She smiled sheepishly as the giant ugly monstrosity that was once the Cake's son giggled at the silly pink pony below him.

"What are you doing you imbecile?!"  yelled Mrs. Cake as she smacked her son upside his head. Pound whimpered at the sting of his mother's hoof and recoiled as she threatened him a second time. "Pumpkin would have dealt with this situation already. You're a disgrace."

While his wife dealt with their son, Mr. Cake took the opportunity to lunge at Pinkie. The deranged stallion looked Pinkie straight in the eye as their blades clashed a second time.

"All of this time you could've been with us, Pinkie." he growled. "Together, we could transform this entire world into a wonderland of sweets! Isn't that what you've always dreamed of?!"

"Not if it came at the cost of all this pain and suffering, not if meant losing my friends!" she roared as she batted him away. Pinkie turned to Twilight and thought for a moment before handing her a barrel of root beer and edging her over to  the side of the Cavity and the bridge.

"Pinkie...what are you doing?" Twilight asked hesitantly as she looked down at the bottom of the waterfall. "Pinkie, stop!"

"Don't worry Twilight," Pinkie said with a grin. "Root beer floats!"

"Pinkie!!!" Twilight's screams faded as she fell to her death.

Pinkie Pie only watched her fall, thinking this must have been the plan from the very beginning. A stranger walks into her life, blows her cover, and gets herself captured. But at least Pinkie was able to share a laugh with this unicorn, who hadn't really felt like a stranger at all. Hopefully she would be able to return to her friends and family. And Pinkie...Pinkie would finish her business with the Cakes, once and for all.

No sooner had she finished that thought when a chain wrapped itself around Pinkie's neck, pulling her onto her candy barrels. Mrs. Cake restrained her while Mr. Cake attacked, and Pinkie danced around and away from his blade until she had him right where she wanted him. Pinkie saw her opportunity when Mr. Cake swept for her hind legs, and with a quick hop she placed a hoof firmly on the blade. Mr. Cake chuckled at the situation.

"Would you like to know something funny, Pinkie?" asked Mr. Cake. "...Even after all this fighting, I'd still let you join us."

"That's so funny, I forgot to laugh." sneered Pinkie, choking through the chain around her neck.

"We've always thought of you as a daughter, Pinkie..."  said Mrs. Cake from behind her. "It's a shame you have to die by our hooves."

"Heh heh, now that one..." Pinkie chuckled, "that's worth a laugh."

"It's too bad we're the ones who'll be having the last laugh, Pinkie." said Mr. Cake solemnly as he pulled a dagger from his coat.

It was fine, Pinkie had landed right on the barrel she'd been aiming for the whole time. She looked Mr. Cake square in the face one last time.

"Ha." laughed Pinkie Pie, as she pressed a button on her peg leg.

~

Twilight hit the water hard, to her surprise she was still alive as she held on desperately to the barrel of root beer. Deep under the sugary water, she heard a massive boom that made the water around her vibrate. When Twilight finally breached the surface of the water, she gasped for breath and looked up at a terrifying sight. The bridge she had been standing on moments before was now burning away and falling apart. Twilight felt her heart break as she searched...there was no sign of Pinkie Pie.

"...P...Pinkiiiiiieee!!!" Twilight screamed her sadness as the water around her swirled and swallowed her into its depths.

~

"...wilight you absolutely have to see...eautiful dresses...ade for your party...palescence  set me back...en she pulled a string...ost dazzling diamonds, fit for a *queen*."

The darkness around Twilight had lost its liquid-like substance, and instead became a cool, damp  breeze as she found herself in what felt like a cave. She was still shaking and heart-broken from what had just happened to Pinkie Pie, but she knew Pinkie would have wanted her to keep going. She only wished she could see around her.

As the memories of the normal light spell came to her, Twilight noticed it had become easier to see. Her horn was giving of a faint glow, and though it still hurt, it felt wonderful to have some magic back at her disposal.

She wiped her tears and looked around to see she was in a cave. She got up and started trotting, noticing a few shiny diamonds in the cave every once in a while. The further she walked, the more common the gems became. Eventually Twilight found herself walking down a corridor of pure diamond, with a light at the very end. She had read in a large number of stories that the character on the edge of death should never walk into the light. Now that she was living it, she sympathized with those characters. Obviously anyone who had ever said "don't go into the light" had never been so close to death, and thus had never experienced the joy of finding light in the cruel darkness of a coma, an escape from their mental prison.

When Twilight stepped into the light and opened her eyes, she wasn't greeted with her friends' smiling faces. She was greeted with the sight of a hundred well-dressed ponies dancing to a waltz. She was standing on a balcony looking down at a dance hall, in a palace made completely of diamond. Sitting on a throne at the very end was a masked white unicorn with an impeccable blue mane, wearing  a dress fit for a queen.

"...Rarity..."