Claire: The Love Doctor

No sound emanated from inside Hearthfire Jewelry. Laying atop Rarity's old fainting chair, Crystal Clarity rested her eyes as she awaited her friend's inquiries. Starburst, seated on Claire's stool, motioned to speak, hesitated, then continued glancing about in search of a question. Claire welcomed this change. The zaniness of Candy, the sarcastic wit of Del, the brash attitude of Whirlwind and the disquieting intimacy of Dove had all joined forces to exhaust her on this peaceful day. However, Starburst's shy reluctance for discussing the romantic afforded her ample time to unwind.

"I--" Starburst almost started before quickly shutting her mouth. "I..."

She hurriedly glanced about at the various objects in the room.

"I--I really like the new jewelry!" she finally shouted. "It's, er... really... beautiful."

"Why, thank you dear," replied Claire, head resting comfortably on a red pillow. "Such fine jewels are often difficult to come across. So, when I discover one to my liking, I ensure it receives the utmost care and attention." She lifted her head up slightly and turned her gaze to Starburst. "Are there any jewels to your liking? Perhaps something refined and classy, or coarse and strong, or maybe something completely opposed to those merits?"

Starburst's strained look lightened into a more relaxed appearance. "I actually have found one to my liking," she replied, happy with the new angle. "Refined and strong, and loyal--as in, I feel like I'd never lose it, and, in some way, that it'd never lose me." Bright pink illuminated her face as she finished.

"Ah," Claire said, sporting her elegant smile. "A truly fine jewel. But, with a jewel this infallibly magnificent in your possession, why the need to consult a jewelry expert?"

"Because... It's..." Starburst started, the strain returning to her face, eyes narrowing as she searched for the right words. "A jewel that I want to buy, but not one I personally own yet. By duty, it's sworn to all the princesses. So, in that sense, I know I'll never lose it, but I'd like it to remain by my side for reasons besides duty and honor."

"Loyalty is the lifeblood of romance," Claire responded, tapping a single claw against her chin. "This certainly explains why Fletcher is such a charmer, even if he doesn't realize it himself."

Starburst flushed deep red. "H-How did you--"

"Darling, please," Claire quickly interjected. "It doesn't take a sixth sense to see your attraction to him. It's not dissimilar to your personal attraction to the hardworking and diligent Del, or your physical attraction to the muscular, green-eyed Prism."

"I'm not attracted to Prism!" Starburst blurted out, nearly losing her balance on the stool.

"Not in terms of personality, but physicality," stated Claire. "However, the two are closely intertwined. After all, a sound mind dwells within a healthy body and, in turn, a sound mind maintains a healthy body. Even Prism knows this, which is why he occasionally exerts himself in spite of his laziness. Good body image isn't simply a matter of genetics; rather, it's a mix of healthy lifestyle and positive self-esteem."

Starburst's expression shifted from strained to painfully unamused.

"I get it. I'm short." Straightening her back, Starburst flared her magnificent wings out, casting a wide shadow over Claire. "Get to the point. Now."

A bead of sweat dripped down Claire's forehead and onto the soft linen below. Intimidation is certainly an unorthodox talent compared to most, but effective nevertheless.

"My point being," Claire continued, attempting to regain her cool demeanor. "Overexertion in the name of proving yourself may yield unintended consequences. Just as excessive physical labor leads to frequent fainting spells, focusing all your effort into pursuing a goal without making time for friends leads to strained relationships. Fletcher likely shares your sentiments, but is uncertain of whether or not your time spent training with him is fueled by romantic interests or professional aspirations."

Starburst retracted her wings, and the heavy atmosphere lifted.

"So," said Starburst, relaxing from her straightened posture. "What do you recommend?"

Claire wiped the remaining sweat from her forehead. "My recommendation is quite simple, really. Spend time with him outside of guard training. Invite him to Ponyville more often. I'm certain Del would love to see him again. And, quite frankly, we'd all love to spend more time with you as well, rather than the unconscious heap Del keeps finding beneath his apple trees."

Starburst nodded to herself. "I could invite him down to Ponyville during his next leave... Though, I know his sister will want to see him... But I bet she wants to see Ponyville as well, so if I forward a letter to her..."

Emerging from her internal world, Starburst held her head confidently high. "I know what I have to do," she announced, her expression exceedingly serious. She pivoted her head towards Claire.

"Claire, thank you," she added. Then, with a smile, "I'm sorry I neglect you guys so much, and I'm sorry I worry you. No guarantees on backing off the training, but the next get-together Candy plans, I'm there."

Claire returned her smile. "I look forward to it, darling."

Starburst dismounted her stool and, after giving Claire a brief hug, exited Hearthfire Jewelry. The next few hours progressed uneventfully. Claire remained in the store, watching the puffy clouds pass as the bright blue sky slowly tinted to an assortment of pinks and reds. She rested her head on the counter, welcoming the end of the day.

A knock sounded from the door, jostling her to alertness. A plain, dark grey colt now entered the store, three pieces of coal representing his cutie-mark, a playful grin extended across his face.

"Excuse me, Miss," he addressed in a jocular tone. "May I trouble you for a bit of love counsel? I have this girlfriend, a purple-dragon-pony, who is the most beautiful that-thing-I-just-said in all Equestria! Problem is, she's stuck sitting behind a counter, working all day long, when we could be out having fun together."

With a snap of his hoof, the fainting chair materialized before him. "I guess that's what I get for dating such a generous pony," he said, laying back in the chair. "Always helping others, when she should be helping herself--and her boyfriend too! In fact, next time I see her, I'll--"

He choked in surprise as Claire landed on top of him, the impact removing his disguise.

"Next time you see her..." Claire started, looking deep into the spring yellow eyes of Prince Illusion. "You'll what?"

"Next time I see her..." Illusion continued, leaning up. "I'll give her a wet, sloppy kiss!"

He darted his head forward into Claire's and embraced her in a kiss so wet and sloppy the slurping noises could be heard from out the store. Claire pulled back, laughing.

"Well, in that case," she said, wiping her mouth. "The only advice I can give you, is to prepare yourself!"

She planted her mouth over Illusion's ear and began nibbling at it. Illusion fell back in the chair.

"Oh! The horror!" he cried, followed by fit of giggling.

The two continued exchanging blows like this until the moon arose over the horizon. Illusion lay next to Claire on the fainting chair, already asleep and letting out a calming rhythm of snores. Claire watched him in appreciative silence. The love doctor, huh? she remarked internally. Illusion let out a content snore, and snuggled a bit closer to her. Yeah, I suppose I know a thing or two.

With a light kiss to his cheek, she closed her eyes and drifted into a deep slumber. Within her dreamscape, she found herself standing in a beautiful green park, with all her friends sitting ahead of her atop a long, patterned blanket.

"Claire!" exclaimed Anthea, resting herself beneath Turquoise's wing. "You're here!"

"About time too!" added Prism Bolt, Cotton Candy chewing a sandwich at his side.

"Should probably get yourself some grub 'fore Candy steals it all," synchronized two Golden Deliciouses, Amber Lily resting against one and Creme de la Creme with the other. She found another Turquoise as well, Nidra mingling with him intimately.

Whirlwind and Icy Storm sat lazily upon a cloud floating overhead, discussing the latest exploits of the Wonderbolts and new air acrobatics to try. Dove and Fletcher both rested their heads on opposite shoulders of Starburst, who seemed content in spite of the weight. Illusion materialized above the basket, quickly opening it and pulling out one of Del's famous apple pies.

"Come on, beautiful," he called, cutting out a slice. "I've got a piece with your name on it. Literally!"

He turned the slice over to reveal her name embroidered in delicious cherry glaze. She smiled, and began making her way to the picnic. Everyone was there: Lulu, Annie, Turqoise, Starburst, Candy, Prism, Del, Nidra, Princess Luna--

She halted, finally noticing the Princess of the night standing just beyond the picnic blanket, looking down at her daughter affectionately nuzzling the green hybrid. She raised her gaze up to Claire.

"I'm sorry to impose like this," she began, walking around her friends. "But I require your assistance. You see, it's my daughter. I worry she may be troubled... romantically."

Claire collapsed on the grass, letting out a muffled groan. She shut her eyes for a few moments, then, with some effort, reopened them.

"It's no problem, Princess," she said graciously, rising to her feet. "No problem at all. Please, continue..."