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Epic Rap Battles of MLP

by enigmaMystere
a silly little thing the ponies in my head persuaded me to do.

Something I just couldn't get off my mind until I wrote it down. Be warned: the ponies in these battles really go off on each other. Almost exactly like it is in "Epic Rap Battles of History", except with less cursing. There's plenty of verbal bashing, though.

Vinyl Scratch is the DJ for most of these battles, and will be doing the all-caps commentary (except for the ones she's in, of course). OC tag because of slight self-insert.

I've heard that this story is better when read with someone else. You know, with each person doing one half of the rap battle? :derpytongue2:

List of Rap Battles (as per request)
#1: Twilight Sparkle vs. Rainbow Dash
#2: Pinkie Pie vs. Rarity
#3: Spa Sisters vs. Flim Flam Brothers
#4: Octavia vs. Vinyl Scratch
#5: Angel vs. Gummy
#6: Derpy Hooves (Ditzy Doo?) vs. Lyra Heartstrings
#7: Princess Luna vs. Discord
#8: Scootaloo vs. Pipsqueak
#9: Fluttershy vs. Screwball
#10: Apple Bloom vs. Diamond Tiara
#11: Trixie vs. Featherweight
#12: Silver Spoon vs. Spike
#13: Sweetie Belle vs. Queen Chrysalis
#14: Applejack vs. Carrot Top
#15: Bon-Bon vs. Lyra Heartstrings
#16: Twilight Sparkle vs. Rainbow Dash (rematch!)
#17: Big Macintosh vs. Shining Armor
#18: Iron Will vs. Photo Finish
#19: Gilda vs. Prince Blueblood
#20: Nightmare Moon vs. the Doctor (Doctor Whooves)
#21: Princess Celestia vs. Princess Luna
#22: Snips and Snails vs. Twist and Ruby Pinch
#23: Braeburn vs. Soarin'
#24: Zecora vs. Cheerilee
#25: Winona vs. Opalescence
#26: Derpy Hooves vs. Pinkie Pie
#27: Spitfire vs. Daring Do
#28: Princess Cadence vs. Queen Chrysalis
#29: Babs Seed vs. Lightning Dust
#30: Sunset Shimmer vs. Trixie *
#31: tba

Picture by Silversnow here on this site.

...should there be a 'sex' tag, considering some of the stuff brought up in the rap battles? :applejackunsure:

Teen
Incomplete
Comedy
Random
Slice of Life
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Romance
 
FDOOO

175770 words: Estimated about 15 hours to read
Download:textHTMLePUB

75 Chapters:

  1. Rap Battle #1 2012-10-30 17:01:53 UTC
    563
  2. Rap Battle #2 2012-10-24 17:09:48 UTC
    654
  3. Rap Battle #3 2012-10-30 16:58:49 UTC
    596
  4. Rap Battle #1: Results and Aftermath 2012-10-30 16:58:13 UTC
    488
  5. Rap Battle #2: Results and Aftermath 2012-10-30 17:15:46 UTC
    622
  6. Rap Battle #3: Results and Aftermath 2012-10-30 18:00:17 UTC
    762
  7. Rap Battle #4 2012-10-31 13:47:39 UTC
    1123
  8. Rap Battle #4: Results and Aftermath 2012-10-31 13:50:25 UTC
    918
  9. Rap Battle #5 2012-10-31 13:54:44 UTC
    1334
  10. Rap Battle #5: Results and Aftermath 2012-06-14 15:21:38 UTC
    494
  11. Rap Battle #6 2012-10-24 14:46:41 UTC
    631
  12. Rap Battle #6: Results and Aftermath 2012-09-11 00:04:51 UTC
    649
  13. Rap Battle #7 2012-06-21 00:53:42 UTC
    1145
  14. Rap Battle #7: Results and Aftermath 2012-06-23 02:36:59 UTC
    809
  15. Rap Battle #8 2012-06-27 05:08:25 UTC
    1251
  16. Rap Battle #8: Results and Aftermath 2012-07-01 11:00:38 UTC
    825
  17. Rap Battle #9 2012-10-17 13:05:49 UTC
    1335
  18. Rap Battle #9: Results and Aftermath 2012-07-20 23:40:22 UTC
    959
  19. Rap Battle #10 2012-07-23 00:53:39 UTC
    1001
  20. Rap Battle #10: Results and Aftermath 2012-08-02 13:58:18 UTC
    1007
  21. Rap Battle #11 2012-08-06 23:03:41 UTC
    1082
  22. Rap Battle #11: Results and Aftermath 2012-08-17 16:00:23 UTC
    1212
  23. Rap Battle #12 2012-08-24 18:10:29 UTC
    908
  24. Rap Battle #12: Results and Aftermath 2012-08-25 13:57:54 UTC
    769
  25. Q&A #1 2012-08-28 22:56:44 UTC
    2277
  26. Rap Battle #13 2012-10-31 13:44:51 UTC
    2397
  27. Rap Battle #13: Results and Aftermath 2012-09-07 23:18:37 UTC
    1681
  28. Rap Battle #4: Alternate Aftermath 2012-09-09 07:37:55 UTC
    1325
  29. Rap Battle #6: Alternate Aftermath 2012-09-12 05:35:43 UTC
    1764
  30. Rap Battle #14 and Rap Battle #7: Alternate Aftermath 2012-09-24 16:30:46 UTC
    1472
  31. Rap Battle #14: Results and Aftermath & Homage Rap Battle 2012-09-30 02:25:22 UTC
    2194
  32. Slice of Life #1 & Rap Battle #10: Alternate Aftermath 2012-11-06 02:33:59 UTC
    1257
  33. Rap Battle #15 2012-10-13 02:59:42 UTC
    801
  34. Rap Battle #15: Results and Aftermath 2012-10-15 17:20:47 UTC
    960
  35. Rap Battle #16 2012-10-22 16:23:14 UTC
    1489
  36. Rap Battle #16: Results and Aftermath & Rap Battle #12: Alternate Aftermath 2012-10-22 16:55:16 UTC
    1333
  37. Rap Battle #17 2012-10-25 19:35:12 UTC
    1437
  38. Rap Battle #17: Results and Aftermath 2012-10-29 15:59:52 UTC
    940
  39. Rap Battle #18 2012-10-31 13:41:29 UTC
    1248
  40. Rap Battle #18: Results and Aftermath 2012-10-31 20:32:13 UTC
    1242
  41. Rap Battle #19 2012-11-02 23:06:02 UTC
    2733
  42. Rap Battle #19: Results and Aftermath 2012-11-05 18:42:21 UTC
    1501
  43. Q&A #2 2012-11-19 14:15:33 UTC
    3958
  44. Rap Battle #20 2012-11-23 07:29:29 UTC
    2256
  45. Rap Battle #20: Results and Aftermath 2012-11-26 08:29:01 UTC
    1788
  46. Bonus Chapter: Rap Battles with OC's ... and a Surprise! 2012-11-28 23:29:48 UTC
    12615
  47. Bonus Chapter: Results and Aftermath & Rap Battle #21 2012-12-08 15:53:57 UTC
    4879
  48. Rap Battle #21: Results and Aftermath 2012-12-18 00:03:29 UTC
    1710
  49. Rap Battle #22 2012-12-19 05:22:50 UTC
    1139
  50. Rap Battle #22: Results and Aftermath 2012-12-30 20:06:27 UTC
    963
  51. Rap Battle #23 2013-01-01 01:59:06 UTC
    1362
  52. Rap Battle #23: Results and Aftermath 2013-01-07 23:23:15 UTC
    1114
  53. Rap Battle #24 2013-01-10 18:56:42 UTC
    1479
  54. Rap Battle #24: Results and Aftermath 2013-01-12 23:53:36 UTC
    1427
  55. Rap Battle #25 2013-01-13 15:26:12 UTC
    1480
  56. Rap Battle #25: Results and Aftermath 2013-01-16 07:34:43 UTC
    1230
  57. Rap Battle #26 2013-01-28 12:51:10 UTC
    1472
  58. Rap Battle #26: Results and Aftermath 2013-04-01 03:54:41 UTC
    2514
  59. Rap Battle #27 2013-04-13 01:16:36 UTC
    2865
  60. Rap Battle #27: Results and Aftermath 2013-04-19 01:34:53 UTC
    2486
  61. Bonus Chapter #2 (pt. 1): Engagement 2013-04-20 17:46:54 UTC
    7623
  62. Bonus Chapter #2 (pt. 2): Entertainment 2013-04-26 15:07:51 UTC
    9403
  63. Bonus Chapter #2 (pt. 3): ...Intrigue? 2013-04-30 12:19:47 UTC
    10002
  64. Q&A #3 Pt. 1 2013-05-04 20:27:24 UTC
    7060
  65. Q&A #3 Pt. 2 2013-05-08 23:47:00 UTC
    10942
  66. Rap Battle #28 2013-05-30 22:53:47 UTC
    3005
  67. Rap Battle #28: Results and Aftermath (Pt. 1) 2013-06-01 18:44:28 UTC
    2658
  68. Rap Battle #28: Results and Aftermath (Pt. 2) 2013-06-26 02:55:20 UTC
    11954
  69. Slice of Life Arc, Pt. 1 2013-07-10 00:48:26 UTC
    2938
  70. Slice of Life Arc, Pt. 2 & Rap Battle #29 2013-09-17 12:40:31 UTC
    2626
  71. Slice of Life Arc, Pt. 3 & Rap Battle #29: Results and Aftermath 2013-12-23 05:06:16 UTC
    2562
  72. Slice of Life Arc, Pt. 4 2014-02-13 15:11:08 UTC
    5005
  73. Rap Battle #30 2014-02-20 01:56:23 UTC
    1566
  74. Rap Battle #30: Results and a Sneak Peek 2015-08-01 15:39:03 UTC
    466
  75. Anarchic Union Arc: Rap Battle #31 2015-08-08 01:03:24 UTC
    2035