Three Little Fillies from Mars
They were always easy targets for Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon’s cruel pranks. Nightmare Night, and the weeks leading up to it, were no exception. Although Scootaloo and her friends were subject to their shenanigans throughout the year (last April Fools was traumatizing), during October the duo had organized an elaborate system of cheap tricks until the end of the month.
The first week was for Apple Bloom. After sundown during that time, Apple Bloom was out in the orchard alone. Diamond dressed up as a monster, hiding behind the trees. She chose the right moment to scare Apple Bloom and chase her around the orchard. The second week was for Sweetie Belle. At school Silver put a plastic cockroach on her lunch when Sweetie wasn’t looking, then watched her dig through her spaghetti until she found it. She was so disgusted that she was excused from class to go to the nurse’s office. Rarity picked her up that same afternoon. On the third week, they made Scootaloo come face-to-face with her arachnophobia. They placed a toy tarantula on her head when she was taking a nap under a tree during recess. She screamed in bloody murder when she woke.
To pour salt into the wounds, Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon created horrible taunts for their victims. When Diamond chased Apple Bloom in her monster costume she screamed at the top of her lungs Apple Bloom, why so gloom? Monsters are you friends, too! Silver Spoon snuck her nose through the door to the nurse’s office and whispered You want fries with that roach? The next day after Scootaloo suffered a blow from the fake starfish, they sang a parody of Incy Wincy Spider to mock her fear.
It was a month of torture for the Cutie Mark Crusaders. They had no way of knowing it, but they figured that the final week of October, possibly on Nightmare Night itself, was reserved for all three of them. They could feel it when they saw their smug little faces.
Apple Bloom called for a special meeting on Friday after school at the clubhouse. She stood at the podium as Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle took their seats. As usual she called row, in which all three of them awkwardly raised their arms.
“I call this meeting into order,” Apple Bloom said, banging her toy gavel on the podium. Her eyes moved from Sweetie to Scootaloo. “As y’all know, this has been a rough month for us,” she sighed.
“You can say that again!” Scootaloo said angrily. “I can’t believe they have the nerve to do something mean like that to me!”
Sweetie raised her hoof. “What about me? I actually got sick when I saw that roach in my lunch! Rarity had to pick me up early!”
“What are they trying to prove?” Scootaloo shook her head. For a moment she placed both of her hooves over her face, breathing into them. “Why are they doing this to us?”
“They’re doing this because they can,” Apple Bloom responded.
The fillies were silent. Scootaloo wanted to add something, but she held herself back. She was still upset over the fake spider prank. The fall breeze entered their clubhouse, blowing on their manes.
“What are we going to do?” asked Scootaloo.
Apple Bloom looked at her, then her eyes went down. “I don’t know.”
“Maybe we should tell an adult, like Applejack,” said Sweetie.
Scootaloo shook her head in disapproval. “That’s boring! I want revenge, not be a tattletale!”
“Then what can we do?” Sweetie asked in desperation. “We only have a week left before they do something really terrible to us! Maybe even less than that!”
That much was true. They didn’t want to spend the rest of the week looking over their shoulders for anything suspicious. And they didn’t want their Nightmare Night to be filled with fear and paranoia (if there wasn’t already fear and paranoia in the first place). Unfortunately, nopony inside the clubhouse had an idea of a counterattack.
Apple Bloom banged her gavel, calling the meeting adjourned. Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle sadly climbed down the clubhouse and returned home. Well, only Sweetie returned home. Scootaloo decided to stay out a little bit longer with her thoughts. More than anything she wanted the chance to get back at Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon for what they did. Scootaloo hated spiders, even more than the two spoiled fillies. She wouldn’t as much look at a photograph of one. During a field trip to the Manehattan Museum of Natural History, she refused to step inside the arachnid exhibit.
Scootaloo entered the park and went down the trail to the playground. Her favorite spot was the swings. She sat herself down and moved it back and forth slowly, although she checked for spiders. Scootaloo shook her head again. This is all Diamond and Silver’s fault, she thought. She held her head on her hooves with a huge frown hanging on her face. She vowed that the final week of October will be payback week. She wanted revenge, but had no clue of how to get even.
She raised her head. The swing was being pushed. She turned herself around.
“It’s not called a swing if you’re not swinging,” said Rainbow Dash. “What are you doing here by yourself?”
“Oh… I like to come here and, you know, think about stuff,” said Scootaloo.
“Like your own private sanctuary?”
“Something like that.”
“Yeah I get that. Sometimes I just like to sit on a cloud after a long day. Nothing wrong with a little bit of chillaxing, you know what I mean?”
“What’s does that mean?” Scootaloo asked.
“Chillax. Chill, plus relax. Made it up myself. Clever, huh?”
“I guess.”
Rainbow Dash kept pushing the swing until Scootaloo took control of it, then she joined her on the other one beside her.
“Nightmare Night is next Saturday,” Rainbow said. “You ready?”
“I don’t even have my costume ready,” Scootaloo said. “I’ll probably just wear a white sheet and pretend I’m a ghost.”
“No way! You want ponies to give you rocks all night?”
“... What do you mean?”
“Nevermind. Don’t worry, I don’t have my costume ready, either.”
Rainbow, while sitting on the swing, opened her saddlebag and stuffed her face to search inside. After a short while she found what she was looking for - a book. Scootaloo skidded to a stop. She had never seen Rainbow read a book before. In fact, she never seen her read anything.
“What’s that?” she asked.
“This? It’s a book I got from Twilight. I read all the Daring Do books a gazillion times already, so she lend me this one. By the way, Daring Do is an amazing series! You’ll love it!”
Scootaloo looked at the cover of Rainbow’s book. On the cover was a great machine that stood on three legs over a city that was on fire against a red sky. On opposite sides of the tripod were little cannons that shoot beams of light that destroyed the city. It was strangest thing she had ever seen. Usually the aliens come in flying saucers, she thought.
“What’s it about?”
“It’s about aliens from Mars attacking Earth with these giant machines and wipe out all life,” Rainbow said. “Twilight said it was one of the first major alien invasion stories ever made, and the greatest. If you ask me, if aliens came to take over Earth, I can kick their sorry tails right back to whatever planet they came from!”
“Is it any good?”
“I don’t know. Let’s read and find out.”
So they did. Rainbow Dash opened to the first chapter and read aloud. Scootaloo listened closely as the book explained that for nearly a century nopony had realized, or even cared to believe, that they were being watched by intelligences greater than their own. That as they busied themselves about their little affairs, the Martians observed and studied, like a pony with a microscope might scrutinize the creatures that swarm and multiply in a drop of water. Rainbow chuckled as she went deeper into the first chapter, but Scootaloo paid full attention as the book warned of how the Martians were ready to draw their plans against Earth.
****
It was a crisp and cool late-Saturday autumn morning, the perfect time for a Cutie Mark Crusaders meeting. Scootaloo paced around clubhouse, occasionally glancing at her watch. They should be here any minute, she said to herself. At least she hoped they’d be here soon. Scootaloo knew Apple Bloom had chores to do, but she’s not sure of what Sweetie does in the morning. Then, she heard somepony climb up the ladder.
“Sweetie Belle, you made it!”
“Uh-huh, I’m here.” Sweetie looked around the room. “Where’s Apple Bloom?”
“She’s coming, I hope. I have something very important to say, but I need all of us here!”
Sweetie Belle nodded. The two stood a few inches from each other in uneasy silence. Scootaloo disliked how often she found herself in situations such as this, being alone with only one of her friends. She wasn’t a very good conversation starter, or a conversation holder. However, she needed something to break the silence. Anything until Apple Bloom arrived, which she hoped was very soon.
“So… what’s up with you?”
“Me? Oh, nothing much,” Sweetie said. “Rarity was helping me with my Nightmare Night costume.”
“Right, right. What are you going as?”
“You know that book series about this princess that travels to different dimensions and fights evil and stuff?”
Scootaloo nodded sideways.
“Oh… it’s a good series.”
Scootaloo didn’t know what else to say. By some miracle she heard somepony familiar climb the ladder. A pink bowtie peek through the door, then a yellow face with orange eyes.
“Apple Bloom, you’re here!” Scootaloo said.
“Yep, I’m here alright. So what is it?”
“You’ll see.”
Scootaloo stood behind the podium while Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle took their seats. It was very strange for her to be holding the gavel this time around. “Is everypony present?” Apple Bloom and Sweetie exchanged looks, then slowly raised their hooves. “Good. I now call this emergency meeting of the Cutie Mark Crusaders into order.” She bang the gavel on the surface of the podium. What a lovely sound, she thought.
“Alright, so what’s this about?” Apple Bloom asked.
Scootaloo cleared her throat. “As you know, we are nearing the end of October, and in the past month Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon have been pranking us.”
“I think we talked about this yesterday,” said Sweetie. “Didn’t we agreed to watch our backs?”
“We did, but that’s not good enough,” said Scootaloo. “We need to fight fire with fire, and last night I thought of a way to do it!”
“Wouldn’t fighting fire with fire cause more fire?” asked Sweetie.
“... May I please finish? Anyway, on Nightmare Night I thought the three of us can dress up like, wait for it… aliens! And we make them believe an invasion is happening! Cool, right?”
Scootaloo grinned widely, expecting a positive reaction from her two friends. All she received was silence, along with confused looks. Apple Bloom sighed, turning her head sideways. She raised her hoof to speak, but lowered it, instead shaking her head.
“... Aliens?” Apple Bloom said blankly.
“Yep.”
“Like outer space, take me to your leader type aliens?”
“You got it.”
“Okay.” There was silence again. She tried to comprehend what was explained to her. “Here’s the deal - Diamond and Silver might be dumb, but they ain’t stupid. You really think they’re that gullible to believe that aliens are in their backyard?”
“They made you believe you were being chased by a monster!” Scootaloo snapped back. “Come on guys, I know this can work!”
“I don’t know,” said Sweetie. “How are we going to convince them that aliens are real?”
“Simple.” Scootaloo went to a drawing board and presented to them a vessel of her own design. “We build a war machine with three legs! We’ll call it, the Tripod!”
“... How the heck are we going to build that in one week?” Apple Bloom asked sharply.
“We made that booby-trapped float for the Summer Harvest Parade in one night when Babs Seed came to town,” Scootaloo said. “I’m pretty sure we can get this thing build in one week!”
“What about us?” Sweetie said. “How are we going to look like aliens?”
“That costume store is still open. We can probably get green makeup and alien masks or something.”
Apple Bloom couldn’t take it anymore. She slumped on her chair, putting her hoof on her face, shaking her head. “I’m sorry, but this has got to be the dumbest idea I ever did heard! We don’t have a chance in Tartarus of pulling this off!”
“How do you know?” Scootaloo asked accusingly. “Have you been to Tartarus?”
“... I’m outta here.”
Apple Bloom removed herself from her chair in a desperate attempt to leave the clubhouse in a huff. She was almost to the doorway, but Scootaloo stopped her. Apple Bloom was going to force her hoof off of her, but she stared at her deeply with pleading eyes. She looked over to Sweetie Belle, who only shrugged her shoulders. Then she sighed, surrendering to Scootaloo’s pouting lips and puppy dog eyes.
“Alright, we’ll help you build your little spaceship.” Scootaloo leaped for joy, flapping her tiny wings. Apple Bloom looked to Sweetie again, who only shrugged her shoulders a second time. “So when do we start?”
“If we start building it now, we can get it done by next week,” Scootaloo said.
“Where are we gonna get the tools from?” asked Apple Bloom.
“Your house, where else?”
****
The Cutie Mark Crusaders spent the rest of the day inside a shed in Sweet Apple Acres building the war machine from space, or at least trying to. They gathered inside the family shed in Sweet Apple Acres, but they didn’t know where to start.
“Okay, what do we do now?” asked Scootaloo.
“You should know,” said Apple Bloom, “this was your idea.”
Scootaloo put her hoof on her chin. There has to be something in the shed that could be of use to them. She heard whistling outside, followed by deep humming. Her eyes widened. She knew who it was outside. Scootaloo ran outside just in time to find “Big” Macintosh passing by the shed.
“Hey Big Mac,” she called. He turned to see little Scootaloo rushing toward him. “Umm… me and my friends are trying to build a spaceship so we can get back at Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon for pranking us all the time. Do you have anything we could use to build one?”
Macintosh kept his eyes on Scootaloo, who grew a little nervous. There was no sign of emotion in his face. He glanced toward the inside of the shed to see Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle standing around. Now Scootaloo wish she hadn’t say anything. Then he looked down at the worrying filly.
“... Yep.”
That was easy, she said to herself.
In no time at all the shed was filled with scrap metal and other objects Macintosh had kept through the years. Now the Cutie Mark Crusaders have to find a way to put it all together.
“You really think we can get this done by Nightmare Night?” Sweetie asked.
“I know so,” said Scootaloo. “We just have to focus and work hard.”
From the early afternoon from dusk they assembled every piece of metal to form the first part of their otherworldly war machine. Apple Bloom helped Sweetie and Scootaloo nail the pieces together, but Scootaloo suggested using the electric power tools to get the job done at a fast rate.
“Nuh-uh, we ain’t supposed to use those,” Apple Bloom warned. “Applejack said they’re off limits! Besides, I’m gonna get in a mighty heap of trouble if she catches us using them!”
Scootaloo rolled her eyes, but she complied and went back to work with the regular hammer and nails. Sweat dripped from their foreheads and their hooves were moist from labor. Once in a while they stopped for snacks and drinks, or to take a five to ten minute breather, then resumed working on their alien ship. At sunset Apple Bloom decided it was time to call it a day. Scootaloo took a few steps back to inspect the ship. It hardly resembled an extra-terrestrial war machine, just a bunch of scrap metal and junk that was nailed together.
“I’d say we’re making progress,” Scootaloo said.
****
The weekend drew to a close and Fright Week was on full progress (Fright Week was just a another way of saying the week of Nightmare Night, as coined by Pinkie Pie). The Cutie Mark Crusaders took caution going to school on Monday morning. They stood by the decision to watch out for each other if Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon were to prank them again. The poor fillies couldn’t turn their backs for one second without seeing Diamond and Silver giggling and laughing. They could be laughing at a joke or plotting their latest scheme against the trio. They couldn’t tell, although Diamond and Silver had been making glances at them a lot.
Everyday after school on that week The Cutie Mark Crusaders met at Sweet Apple Acres to complete the work of their Martian war machine. They took a couple of hours of the afternoon to build it, then going home to complete their homework. On Thursday the warship looked like a giant golf ball with a little door on the side and a see-through horizontal gap on the front.
“Great, it’s almost done,” Scootaloo said. “Now we have to make those legs.”
Apple Bloom examined the golf ball-shaped alien warcraft with squinted eyes. “To be honest, I don’t think we’re gonna get the legs done.”
That wasn’t the news she wanted to hear. Her hopes for the alien vessel to resemble the one from Rainbow’s book were dashed. “But we have to build the legs!” she whined. “It was part of my design! Now everything’s ruined!”
Sweetie Belle stepped out of the shed to get some air. However, from the corner of her eye she saw an old jalopy sitting on the field. It didn’t look like anypony was using it, and it still had perfectly good wheels attached to it.
“How about we use wheels?” she asked.
Scootaloo imagined the ship having wheels with a feeling of indifference. It wasn’t what she wanted, but wheels will have to do. They pulled the wheels from the old jalopy and placed them on the front and back sides of their war machine.
“At least it’s coming together,” Scootaloo said.
“What do we do now?” Sweetie asked.
Scootaloo was deep in thought. Looking back at Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle an idea formed in her mind. “Costumes!” she exclaimed. “Do you guys still have those costumes we wore at the talent show?”
Apple Bloom and Sweetie awkwardly nodded heads, with the former asking why.
“We’re going to need them, plus we need alien masks! Get them ready by tomorrow, then we’ll discuss battle plans!”
Scootaloo excitedly rushed out of the shed, leaving Apple Bloom and Sweetie behind. They watched with uncertainty as she disappeared into the sunset.
“We’re going to be the silliest looking aliens in the world, I tell you what,” Apple Bloom said.
“You’re telling me… I wanted to wear my Princess Andromeda costume this year,” Sweetie whined.
****
Scootaloo couldn’t believe her revenge fantasy was almost becoming a reality. Her alien war machine was almost ready to go, although she didn’t get the three legs she wanted. It didn’t matter anyway. On Nightmare Night they will roam the streets and then Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon will feel the same fear and humiliation the Cutie Mark Crusaders felt all this month.
She closed her eyes and thought about the looks on their faces when they saw their spaceship. She skipped on the road merrily, giggling when she thought of how Diamond and Silver will cry like newborn foals, believing that aliens are here to destroy civilization. In two days her revenge will be complete.
“Well, well, well if it isn’t Scootaloo,” a filly said.
The smile on her face disappeared. She knew that mocking tone. Blocking her path were the two devils in disguise as fillies, Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon. She hated that look they had whenever they cornered her. “We hope we didn’t scare you too much with that fake spider,” Tiara said. “You must be so humiliated.”
“Not as humiliated as you’ll be when Nightmare Night comes!” retorted Scootaloo.
“Oh really? And what pray tell do you have planned for us?”
“I’m not telling you, but let me say that you two are going to be sorry for pranking us all this month!”
Diamond and her minion gave each other questionable glances. Then they turned their attention once again on Scootaloo, and bellowed with cruel laughter. She expected that kind of reaction from them. Scootaloo gritted her teeth, growling under her breath.
“Yeah right, like you and your two loser friends could ever prank us!” Diamond laughed. Scootaloo was ready for her back legs to be acquainted with Diamond’s teeth, but she restrained herself. “It was fun talking to you, but we have to go now. We have more important things to do than waste time with you.” The two spoiled brats held their noses in the air walked pass Scootaloo without another word.
Scootaloo sent a death glare to their backs. If she focused her energy and hatred for them long enough, maybe they’ll burst into flames. She read it in a comic book once. Sadly, the two fillies did not spontaneously combust. Oh well. She couldn’t stand around being miserable. She had to get home by ready for her big night of revenge. She couldn’t let anything get in her way.
****
Finally, after a week of hard labor and sweat and a few tears, the war vessel from the red planet was completed. Scootaloo stood proudly in front of it, admiring the amount effort she and her friends put. They gave the ship a nice coating of dark grey, some of it staining the hair and manes of the fillies. Apple Bloom pumped air into the tires, seeing how they weren’t used for a long time. In the early hours of Saturday morning, Scootaloo and Apple Bloom included additional features, at the request of the former and at the annoyance of the latter, to be used later during the night.
“So, what do you guys think?” asked Scootaloo.
Apple Bloom and Sweetie examined their completed model ship; scanning every inch, every line of nails, the width, the length; like how an art critic inspects a sculpture or a painting.
“I still think this is a dumb idea,” Apple Bloom said. “How are we going to even find Diamond and Silver with this hunk of junk?”
“Simple - just ride this thing into town and hope we catch them. And with the new stuff Apple Bloom and I added, it won’t be that hard.”
“New stuff? What new stuff?” Sweetie asked.
“All sorts of stuff! Like lights, sound effects, cannons that shoot those little suction dart thingies…”
Sweetie wanted confirmation from Apple Bloom, who rolled her eyes and said, “We just wrapped Hearth’s Warming lights around it, and I attached a tape recorder with a megaphone on the top of the ship.”
“And the cannons?” Sweetie asked.
“There are no cannons, we just have those toy dart guns.”
“Way to ruin the surprise,” mumbled Scootaloo.
She shook off Apple Bloom’s snarkiness and continued to gaze at the newly-completed ship with a gleam in her eyes. Everything around her vanished, including her friends, only herself and the “war machine.” She returned to reality when a hoof tapped her head.
“Earth to Scootaloo,” Apple Bloom called.
“Earth… more like Mars to Scootaloo.” Scootaloo rubbed her hooves and chuckled deviously. Everything was about to come together. She called for Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle to help her push their ship out of the shed, but it was too heavy for their little hooves.
“What in the hay is that thing?” Applejack said.
The Cutie Mark Crusaders stopped pushing and Applejack standing in the doorway of the shed, with her mouth open.
“This is something we build for Nightmare Night,” Scootaloo said. “It doesn’t look like it, but it’s supposed to be a alien spaceship.”
“... And y’all did this all by yourselves?”
The fillies nodded. Applejack took more time staring at the their work, her mouth moving but no words coming out. Then she smirked. “I’ll be darned. So that’s what you three been doing in the shed all this week. I’m mighty impressed.” Applejack joined them in pushing the ship outside. “So what is this for, anyway? Some kind of costume contest?”
“... Something like that,” Scootaloo said.
“Well, I sure hope you girls win.”
“Oh we’re going to win alright,” Scootaloo said in a malicious tone. Apple Bloom wondered why her sister did not hear her laugh like a comic book villain.
TO BE CONTINUED…
Three Little Fillies from Mars
As the sun disappeared and the moon gave way, Farmer Cob sat on his rocking chair, in the comfort of his outside porch. He liked to watch the stars and listen to the soothing songs of the crickets that hid somewhere in his cornfield. Below his chair there was a bowl of candy. Since his home was several miles from the nearest town it was impossible for children to find him, but he still kept his bowl of candy on standby just in case.
The gentle motion of his chair made Cob jaded. Unfortunately he couldn’t stop rocking if he wanted to. It was so relaxing, so peaceful, why would he stop? It was a perfect way to spend a wonderful night.
Cob yawned, and not a moment later he closed his eyes and had dreams about corn dancing around his head.
Then, a faint humming sound came from the sky. The humming grew louder, and Cob slowly opened his eyes. He saw something in the sky. It looked like a shooting star, but he never saw a shooting star move so slowly. He climbed out of his chair and inspected the sky. Whatever it was, it was getting closer.
The object falling from the sky was coming right toward his house, and Cob realized that it was not a shooting star. He didn’t know what it was, but he wasn’t going to stay to find out. He rushed inside his house and took cover under a nearby table. It sounded as though an airship was going to crash into his cornfield. He held himself tight and prepared for the worst.
Oddly enough, everything was silent.
A moment later somepony was knocking on his door. Farmer Cob debated whether he should answer it. It was one of the things he hated about living in the middle of nowhere. There were several knocks on his door, and he had no choice but to answer it. Maybe it was somepony looking for shelter from the strange noise. But how could that be if there were nopony else around for miles?
“Hello?” Cob asked. “Who’s there?”
There was no answer. His hoof trembled as he reached for the knob. He twisted the knob and pushed the door open with caution.
He should have just stayed inside.
There were visitors in front of him, but not the visitors he thought would be. Before him were two bizarre creatures, just a few inches taller than him. They stood upright on their legs, and wore green suits, with glass helmets over their ugly, skull-like faces. Cob’s mouth hung agape at the sight of their large brains the glass helmets protected.
“Ack, ack, ack, ack, ack?” one of them said.
This was too much for Farmer Cob’s mind to take. Instead of screaming in terror, he immediately fell backwards unconscious. The two visitors looked at each other, then shrugged their shoulders. They removed him from the floor by his arms and legs and carried him into their flying saucer.
****
“Come on, where is she?” Scootaloo said under her breath. She and Apple Bloom stood outside Sweet Apple Acres wearing the costumes and makeup they wore for the talent show. Scootaloo paced back and forth, taking quick glances at her watch. “Sweetie should’ve been here by now! At this rate we’re gonna miss Nightmare Night!”
“Scootaloo relax, she’ll be here,” Apple Bloom said. “It’s still early.”
Scootaloo forced herself to not suggest the idea that they leave Sweetie Belle behind. Still, she wish she hadn’t decide to delay the evening. She looked over herself a few times, making sure Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon wouldn’t sneak up on them.
Pranking the spoiled brats wasn’t on Apple Bloom’s mind, however. Her thoughts focused on how ridiculous she looked in her black costume. Since the talent show she swore to never wear it again. Apple Bloom found it strange that neither she, Scootaloo, and Sweetie Belle hadn’t tossed their costumes away.
Suddenly, they heard hooves galloping toward them. A small voice in the distance was shouting I’m coming, I’m coming! I’m here! Apple Bloom squinted her eyes, and realized it was Sweetie Belle running their direction.
“See? I told you she’ll be here.”
Scootaloo was relieved. Finally their mission can begin, but when Sweetie caught up with them, Scootaloo frowned and gritted her teeth. She wasn’t wearing her rock band costume, but she was adorned in a blue dress, a golden tiara, fake wings, and a long yellow wig. Her white cheeks had little stars on them.
“Sorry I’m late,” she said.
“... Sweetie Belle, what are you wearing,” Scootaloo asked flatly.
“This? It’s my Princess Andromeda costume. Do you like it?”
Scootaloo dragged her hoof down her face, shaking her head in disappointment. “I told you to wear your show stoppers costume!”
“But Rarity and I worked hard on this!” she whined.
“We can’t scare Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon if you’re wearing a princess dress!”
“Girls, can’t we talk about this some other time?” Apple Bloom asked, budding between them. “Let’s just do what we have to do and go home.”
Scootaloo glared at Sweetie, then rolled her eyes. She lead the two of them inside their model ship. Inside were three seats, two in the back and one in the front center. Surrounding each seat were pedals and handlebars from old bicycles for maneuvering the wheels. There was a large windshield on the front for them to see through. Hanging from the top was a long piece of string for somepony to pull to turn the tape recorder on when the time was right.
“Okay, we have to pedal really hard and fast in order for this thing to move,” Scootaloo said, “and turn the handlebars when I say so.” She counted to three out loud so Apple Bloom and Sweetie can pace themselves. After three, like cyclists at a tournament, the Cutie Mark Crusaders pedaled to the metal, grunting and groaning as they drove their alien spaceship into the road ahead.
****
Farmer Cob could have sworn he was still in his house. When he came to his vision was blurry, the sounds faint and inaudible. White light burnt his retinas, causing his eyes to shut tightly. Cob found himself lying on his back when his sight was clear. He wanted to get up, but he couldn’t move his limbs nor his body. He was restrained to a metal table of some kind. Wherever he looked there was nothing but strange lights and other things he didn’t recognize.
There were voices, speaking to each other in a language he didn’t understand. Ack, ack, ack, ack, the voices went. Cob lifted his head as high as he could, and there they were - those awful-looking bipedal beings at his doorstep, their backs turned to him.
“Ack, ack, ack, ack, ack?” the one on the right went.
“Ack, ack, ack,” the one on the left answered.
They pressed buttons, turned switches, and pulled levers. Cob’s feeble attempts to free himself from the confines of the metal table caught the attention of the aliens, and they rushed toward the poor frightened stallion.
“No, please! Don’t hurt me!” Cob pleaded.
The aliens gave themselves confused looks. To the distraught of the corn farmer, they laughed at his face. The one on Cob’s right pulled something from his green suit. It was a brochure in its hand, with a photograph of Earth on the cover. The right alien spoke to Cob in its native tongue, consisting nothing but ack ack. It pointed to the planet on the brochure.
“I don’t seem to understand you,” Cob said, his voice shaking. “Please don’t hurt me, I’m only an old stallion.”
The alien reached for its chest and played with the buttons on its green suit. Then it began to speak, but as spoke with its otherworldly language, another voice emerged.
“... We hail the Planet Mars,” the voice box translated. “Our Grand Ruler has sent us on a scouting mission. You will tell us everything we need to know about earth.”
“But, but I don’t know anything,” Cob said frantically, “other than it’s the third planet from the sun; its orbit is 365.26 Earth days; it’s 92,960,000 miles from the sun; about 71% of the earth’s surface is covered in water… but I don’t know anything else!”
The Martians gave Cob blank stares. The one on the left searched under the table. Standing up, on its hands was a helmet with lightbulbs.
“What are you doing?” Cob shouted. “Don’t put that thing on me, please!” His pleads were ignored. The martians strapped the helmet on his head. A long cord was connected to the top of the ceiling. The other martian rushed to the corner of the room and pulled a lever.
An electric shock made Cob’s body stiff. The martians approached a giant screen, where it flashed images of Earth and its inhabitants from his brain.
Three Little Fillies from Mars
There were many other things Apple Bloom would rather do than help drive the spaceship through the streets. Her legs moved so much that she was worried they were going to fall off. The sweat from her forehead melted the makeup. She couldn’t believe what was happening. All of this effort and the ship is moving five miles per hour. When it got dark enough Scootaloo turned the lights on the ship on. The multicolored Hearth’s Warming lights flickered and blinked. Although the ship was moving at such a slow rate, they still had to keep their eyes open for the little ones roaming the streets in their costumes. Some of them had been distracted by the brightly colored seasonal lights, mistaking it for the sleigh of Old Saint Kringle.
“Faster!” Scootaloo yelled.
Apple Bloom glanced at Sweetie, who was pedaling next to her. The poor child was panting heavily in her blue dress. Under her breath she lamented how she couldn’t go on anymore and how she was ruining her costume. Apple Bloom wish Scootaloo would just turn around and see what was happening.
They hit a bump on the road, and everything was at a standstill. Scootaloo fell off her chair, as did Apple Bloom and Sweetie.
“Hey! What gives?” The world looked as though somepony had slightly tilted it sideways when she gazed out the front view window. She crawled toward the door, opened it and jumped outside. She cursed with gritted teeth when she saw that one of the wheels had connected to a pothole, making the ship immobile. “No, no! How could this happen? All our work, ruined!”
Apple Bloom and Sweetie joined her, both of them examining the ship. Scootaloo slumped on the ground with her arms holding her head. Her chances for sweet revenge were slim as of the night. It took a while for everypony to notice that Sweetie was missing. When they found her, she was with a group of children whom a kindly couple was giving candy. She went to a few more house with the children.
“Sweetie don’t waste time, doesn’t she?” Apple Bloom said. Sweetie Belle rushed back to her friends with a bag filled with candy and a grin on her face. Her smile disappeared when Scootaloo glared at her.
“... Want some?” she asked, presenting a chocolate bar.
“There’s no time for candy!” Scootaloo said. “We have to find Diamond Tiara before it’s too late, and in case you haven’t noticed, our ship is down!”
Scootaloo looked down at her watch. It was 6:47 pm. She mumbled something unpleasant under her breath, and paced back and forth shaking her head. Then she leaned on the fallen spaceship to cool herself down.
“Now what do we do?” Apple Bloom asked.
Scootaloo was silent. Their ship was down, and they have no way of knowing where Diamond Tiara was. In fact, it could be possible that she wasn’t even in this part of town tonight. What a great way to spend the night, she thought. The week-long effort, all for nothing. No, it couldn’t be. She shook the thought from her mind. Scootaloo faced her friends with a look of determination.
“I guess we have to walk.”
“Walk where?” asked Apple Bloom.
“Anywhere. With any luck, we’ll find Diamond and Silver on the street and scare them to death.” She smiled at them, then said in a light-hearted tone, “Don’t worry, it’s only a minor setback.”
“Scootaloo, you do know that there are a million kids outside tonight, right?” Apple Bloom said. “The odds of finding Diamond Tiara out here are against us.”
“You worry too much.” Scootaloo rushed back into the fallen ship to grab the essentials; the toy guns, flashlights, silly string. She also climbed to the top and swiped the megaphone and the tape recorder. “What are you waiting for?” she asked. “Let’s get going.”
Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle watched her happily trot into the darkness with worried looks on their faces. Sweetie took a bite of a bar of Chocoblast, chewing it slowly and with caution. Apple Bloom asked herself if she wanted to go through with Scootaloo’s plans, all while hearing Scootaloo call their names.
“Come on Sweetie, let’s get this over with.”
“Don’t you want to get some candy first?” Sweetie asked. “Who knows how long we’ll be out here.”
It is Nightmare Night, Apple Bloom figured, and it wouldn’t be a proper Nightmare Night without having treats and sweets. Before they joined Scootaloo on the road, Apple Bloom and Sweetie visited a couple of houses to fill their bags full of candy. Then they ran off into the night, an alien and a princess, with a pegasus out for revenge.
****
Klaatu and Nikto couldn’t be more disappointed in the Earthling they kidnapped. They couldn’t find any useful information about the planet. Instead, Cob’s brain presented images of corn, cornfields, cornflakes, popcorn. Sometimes his brain projected these dance parties called hootenannies, much to their confusion, then it was back to more corn. Klaatu decided they’ve had enough of looking at the yellow vegetable, turned the screen off, and removed the helmet from Cob’s head.
“... Please, let me go,” Cob said weakly. He was on the verge of tears. Klaatu only frowned at him, then went back to chat with Nikto with their translators off, so the farmer couldn’t understand what they were saying. After a short while they turned their attention on him again. Much to Cob’s misfortune, they weren’t finish with him yet.
Klaatu advanced slowly to the teary-eyed farmer while pressing the buttons on his green chest plate. “Your corn-infested mind has failed in giving us the information we need on this planet,” he said. “By default, we should destroy you, but we won’t. Instead we have another use for you.”
Klaatu looked how pathetic Farmer Cob was; lying on his back on the metal table, sobbing like a newborn Martian larva after the birthing process. He was pitiful, but in a strangely amusing sort of way. He couldn’t dwell on the thought for long. He pointed to Nikto. “Take the Earthling to the Transformation Chamber!” he commanded.
Farmer Cob’s limbs were released from the table, only for Nikto to drag him to a giant tube in the back on the ship. He was screaming for help on the way there. Nikto couldn’t figure out why, since no living organism can hear him. Klaatu stripped down from his green suit, revealing his pencil-like body, then removed his helmet. Nikto locked Cob inside the glass tube, pointing and laughing as the stallion banged on the impenetrable glass and pleaded for his freedom. Klaatu stepped inside the other glass tube that stood next to Cob’s, then locked himself in.
“Ack ack ack!” Klaatu shouted.
At the control panel, Nikto pressed a series a button before pulling a lever. Thick green liquid poured inside the tubes, and Farmer Cob was in a frenzy. Both Klaatu and Nikto agreed on how annoying and childish the Earthling was behaving. He screamed so much that they didn’t noticed the farmer was silent until they saw he was suspended inside the green liquid. Nikto watched as the green slime was filled in Klaatu’s tube.
A few minutes later, the transformation process was completed. Nikto pressed buttons, then pressed a green button on the center, and Klaatu’s tube opened, releasing green slime on the floor and into a drain. Out of the tube Klaatu stepped out, but not in his Martian body. He came out as an elderly, tan-coated stallion with a white mane. Initially he tried to walk on his two legs, but he was forced on his four legs. Nikto inspected Klaatu’s new body. He went to the suspended farmer, and noticed that he was wearing glasses.
Klaatu opened his mouth to speak, but he had difficulty with his voice box. However, it was no matter to him. He has been through the transformation process with different species throughout his life, and the Earthling was no different. Finally, Klaatu opened his mouth to speak to Nikto.
“... The transformation is a success!” he said. Although he was in the Earthling’s body, Klaatu retained his original voice. “Nikto, is their any sign of civilization nearest us?”
Nikto rushed to a holographic map and ran his fingers through some buttons. According to the ship’s holographic map there was a small town twenty-five miles away from the farmer’s house, which will only be a short flight for them.
The town’s name was Ponyville.
“Then to Ponyville we shall go!” Klaatu said.
The two Martians strapped themselves in their seats. Klaatu pressed buttons to start the ship, then stopped when he realized that he had no fingers, but hooves instead. Strange, he thought, the other species usually have at least some kind of appendage on their arms. Nikto helped by finishing the startup for him. Klaatu was relieved that he can still use the steering wheel. Their flying saucer was lifted off the ground and into the dark sky. Aliens were coming to Ponyville.
