Why to Not Read Clopfics

       As you may have read in some place or another, you may have found out the side effects of reading Clopfics on the Mane 6. Well in case you live in a cave or under a rock with Internet access and still managed to avoid reading these effects, then here they are

Fluttershy: she cries miserably if you read a Clopfic.

Rarity: She becomes utterly disgusted and will no longer consider you a brony.

Twilight Sparkle: She hides herself in shame and embarrassment of the lies you have just read and endorsed.

Rainbow dash: She has the power to give and take away. You will become 20% lamer.

Applejack: She will deem you with no dignity and lasso you to hang from the highest branch in their orchard until the blood rushes to your head and explode.

Pinkie Pie: She was insane, she is insane, and she will always be insane. You will be killed by her in an instant because this is no funny matter to her (and that's saying a lot).

       Don't believe me? Well let's just hear what they have to say now.

          "*'sob... 'sob... 'cry... 'sob... You... Shouldn't read clopfics... Because... *whiine... Cry" -Fluttershy-

          "If you were to ask mua about the foul literature that are the... Clop fictions, then let me just tell you that it is dirty, low, and downright despicable. Only the most disgusting of low-life ruffians read them. And for those of you pony fanatics, or how you refer to yourselves as, ahem, bronies,  that do read this garbage that mars all of pony society, can all just direct yourself out of my sight and the sight of all my fellow ponies, for you are now nothing to us any further from this day other than the scum of the earth." -Rarity-

          "I, Twilight Sparkle, am deeply disappointed in all of you. You have ridiculed me and my friends, but I suffer the extra mile for I am the most cliche out of all. And for those of you who believe those who have written such blasphemous lies, you too have driven me to shame and embarrassment to where I must hide from society, even from my closest friends who have never looked at me the same ever again. Thanks a lot for the life scarring, your no longer faithful nor existing, Twilight Sparkle." -(third times the charm) Twilight Sparkle-

          "HEY!! YEA YOU, AT THAT BOX LIKE THINGY! Who in your right mind do you think you are talking about my friends like that let alone me!? Sure for some of them it might be possible ~RAINBOW!!!~ (mane 6) hehe, but me!?!? Let me just tell you something bub, I did not become 20% cooler multiple times to be bought down to the rank of a bucking ho! You bring me down, I bring you down. 20% MUTHA BUCKA!!" -RainbowDash-

          "Now lemme tell ya'll somethin' here right now you yung li'l buck, I don't like it when people start goin about town tellin their lies, ESPECIALLY WHEN IT FORSAKES THEIR HONOR LIKE THAT!! You might trample over me and you'll live through the torturen' but when y'all gonna be doing it to my friends, you'll be hangin' from the highest point in all of Equestria. YA GOT THAT PUNK!?" -AppleJack-

      "Screw the rules, I'm Pinkie Pie and this is no laughing matter and since it makes ponies sad and not happy then you die! YAY! WHO WANTS MUFFINS!!!" -The Great Wise Budha Guru that is Pinkie Pie- (she payed me extra to write that)

       Wait a minute... I'm getting a live broadcast from Princess Celestia herself! Here she is now.

       "Attention all Bronies, for all who defile the name of me, my sister, or any of our subjects; you will be sentenced to immediate deportationn to the moon."

       Well there you have it from the princess.