An Odyssey

No of course she wouldnt even ask me how my day was as if she is the only working one here well baby i have something to say too im working just as much and if you dont believe it just take a look at the bills that i pay for us both with my gigs whirligigs like that one in kindergarten dad made me one said if the wind blows enough it will spin round and round but it never spun span maybe spun no idea whenever the world of ideas is entered we lose the definition of the one we love of course no she didnt love me back then and she doesnt really love me now shes not the lesbian type she maybe found in me a toy and experiment something to play with and then throw away like the bagel i ate yesterday so sturdy like a sturgeon bagel disgusting let the dogs eat it i wonder they never really digest as we do oh celestia what rambling i guess my digestion isnt what it used to be but of course she never understands thinks we djs only survive on beer and crackers well i love paellas too and what not i am a gourmet too and she doesnt even think i know all these words takes me for a simpleton that book science fiction that i read today did the author really think wed be going into open space ha i wonder how the fuel is not enough to sustain the because there is aerodynamics and the wings of the bird when it flies is enough for her to keep afloat the gig i gave a month ago there was this new fella in the music world neon they called him i didnt give a floating fuck about that i just wanted this stud between my thighs and guess what guess what lousy octavia who doesnt give me half a fuck when i need a whole one i enjoyed it so much tongue is nice but sometimes you just crave the cock i wonder how straight lesbians live without a cock in their life ha straight haha straight lesbians ha thats cause they have all these toys to play with and pleasure oh celestia why dont you give me a long good fuck octavia the lousy mare i wonder but when we just met oh i remember that wonderful day in ponyville i was playing a gig there with pinkie thats one party animal for sure and i see this rump buying apples and i just couldnt i mean in the middle of the concert she was completely disinterested i had to approach her i did i asked why didnt you listen oh so you dont like electro well oh a musician the cello psh i could play a cello any day and then you doubted me oh baby you always doubted me and we met and i played your fucking cello and you told me you fell in love with me then how sappy no i dont think you really did it was such a such a such a big mistake i guess it could never work in such a society it could never work either but its not even the society its not even the law its the relationship its breaking up without her even realising it we went for a vacation in the griffin kingdom and kissed on the beach in the night wasnt that something okay maybe then it wasnt doomed from the start maybe there was something good in it the roses she gave me were red and the violets were blue so hard to live alone do you feel it too so i guess all right there was a goal behind it of some sort its something more than celestia dammit weve lived together for fucking years how come its not a symbol of devotion hows that for a fucking ring for you i couldnt still i need my promiscuity change of plans join a monastery but what if monastery mares are just the same imagine every promiscuous mare joins the monastery and theres a jug of whores in one place and they call it the holy place yea and the right place and the house of keys too celestia its so fucking sad that there are foals like that poor mute deaf and dumb its not their fault of course but parents i guess yes maybe had drunken intercourse incest and a foal was born but these are also the plight of healthy parents celestia id never be able to raise such a foal or any foal for that matter i guess but were not trying to help them any of them what do we do we build shelters and close our eyes we avert our gazes we try not to notice the shining light look its right there no no idea not a clue nopony looks at the shining light we the wayward couriers of equine souls the artists no the artistes yeah thats better we shape the soul like a lump of clay why is clay death or so he wrote but then again she chose the divine next time so upon our church we build our art and ponies visit our church for what let me ask there is no salvation here only sorrow and no salvation is elsewhere we just run from the green light towards eternal darkness so dark here i guess must be around three or is it like time stopped the sideways snail of time no longer moving and the whiteness of day will never come what oh what a sombre thought oh didnt you never see the light get home tadam tadam oh no we never aint never seen the light get home through the cloooooouds with theee oh celestia almost dozed off there but isnt that my initial intention initiated at the lodge heh like all good djs do its six am i can see my breath tadam tadam never seen my baby get home but there she is mah baby lying there in her bed of lies oh celestia how she wouldnt smile at me when i need a smile how she wouldnt kiss me when i need a kiss how she wouldnt fuck me when i need a fuck shes the lousiest marefriend and still i wonder why i cling to her why i keep climbing this cliff together with her were bound to fall its hopeless useless i have no idea why we started dating in the first place it was such a huge mistake and now we cant rectify it when she woke me up in the middle of the dream we were together there falling through the cracks and there was kinda like this narrator guy and he says and then the ghosts took us and i screamed but not in reality i wonder why how come is that when you scream in a nightmare nopony can hear you in reality maybe because you suddenly turn mute or maybe i did oh celestia what if i do it every time and she just doesnt notice well that wouldnt surprise me shes deaf and withdrawn like that and she calls me deaf when i dont hear some unimportant piece of gibberish that she says neon yeah that was the one who was really deaf the dj when he fucked my brains out and i screamed his name he said harder scream it harder and i was already on top of my lungs my voice breaking and he just screamed harder harder and i was shouting into his fucking ear when he was finally satisfied sometimes its just so hard with stallions heh hard maybe thats why i like to play for both teams when i am tired enough of their cockthinking i can always turn to my own sex for consolation is it fair though i wonder shouldnt you just be playing for the same team all your life ah but who can judge whats fair in this unfair society she thinks she has this education thats why shes smarter than me but guess what baby this university of life is more important than your bloody studies tumbada tumbada they say its like do the auxil no not entirely sure grammar school for talented unicorns what racism as if earth ponies cant learn grammar too well octavia heres your example she posh grammatician of our times its all over but the crying babe and well sail away on an atoic rocket into eternal bliss oh yeah cause shes my fallout filly yeah but shes radioactive radioactive oh celestia how i want a gin right now but not the kind of watery oily gin described in that book like a medicine he drank it no i want the hard grass tasty gin like oh of course i can feel it on her breath she sly cellist she drank without me again ah when was the last time we even drank together or got out anywhere why we used to go out so many times when we just started dating and she laughed and then i laughed oh celestia we were so happy back then and she always gave me that look like that time when we met in ponyville ah she was buying apples and i looked at her a long look not necessarily at the butt but at the butt too and she asked me was i looking at her rump and i said no and i looked again and she smiled she knew i was looking and she asked me again was i sure and i said yes i was so confused by now was she delighted by that fact and she asked whether i looked at any mares rump and then i knew it and i laughed and no i said no not me No.

Moscow, 2015