Fallout Equestria – Morals of the Wasteland

“When you’ll get to us . . . . . then you can start asking questions. Gideon, I repeat . . . . . I do not expect you to forgive me. You have every right not to love me. I’m obviously not a great Mother, if I let my baby to be raised in a town of slavery. But at least you’ll be safe here, and you will have a better life, than one in chains.”

“They call themselves 'The Lookouts', as they look out for any help they find.”

“Yes, I did knew that Pony, and that's all we're gonna talk about in this regard.”

“. . . . you're one of those that Red Eye sent after the kid.”

“I know, you must be in a lot of pain. But don't worry Gideon. This will be all over soon. I'm here for you now.”

"Gideon . . . . meet your Mother, Sunlight Flower."

"As far as I cared after hearing that message, a Mother was nothing to me but just a pony who gives birth to you."

“Forget not those who came before”

Chapter 7: A Safe Haven as Home

I figured I should get used to waking up after nearly dying by now. But for a decent change, somepony else was waking me up this time.

I opened my eyes, and things took all kinds of a new turn.

This time I woke up while lying on a comfortable bed flat on my back, unlike the time before when I woke up on cold metal train-tracks. And this time I didn't smell Deadtrott's radioactive, rotten blood. Instead I smelled things I wasn't able to describe at the time. Smell of brand new, un-scavenged, clean medicine.

"This is what a proper clinic smells like" I thought to myself as I realized this is where I woke up.

Slowly I regained consciousness, and I started feeling being wrapped in bandages. I thought that maybe it was still this paralyzing shit that Deadtrott injected me with, but no. This time I could move, and I didn't felt that much pain.

Grey everywhere, grey here, grey there, not to mention the grey. This was just the ceiling. I then finally tried to raise my head, probably hoping the rest of wherever I am wouldn't be the same color.

"There, there Gideon, don't rush. You're gonna be fine."

Somepony suddenly spoke while placing hoofs on my shoulders slowly and gently stopping me from getting up.

"How are you feeling?"

I instead turned my head to the right. I saw a Unicorn mare.

Now for a second I could have mistaken it with a mirror, but this was the same mare I saw before I lost consciousness. A mane as red as blood, and eyes crystal blue, like mine. But a gold yellow coat unlike mine.

I had another glorious opportunity of being somepony's concern. Just like before, I felt something pleasant as I saw another pony looking at me with care and love.

There was no doubt. This mare was the mare from the message. This mare was Sunlight Flower.

And even if I just met her before passing out, seeing her a second time was just as equally incredible.

I finally spoke. And wouldn't you know it, I answered a question with a question. And I just woke up from a near death-experience, so I didn't spoke straight.

"Are you her? Are you . . . . . . . . my Mother?"

"Yes Gideon" She answered "It's me. You're safe now."

Then I remembered she just asked me a question.

"I . . . . I don't know, I . . . . . . I think I'm okay . . ."

I actually did felt well. I didn't feel any pain. I didn't even feel my hoofs numb after all that trotting back there. No horseshoes and a wasteland of nothingness will do that to you. Seems my Mother was an excellent medic.

She continued speaking to me in her sweet motherly way. All those words I'm using to describe her, at that time I was still convinced that those kinds of words were meaningless in this world.

"After hearing about everything you've been through, I was surprised you were still in one piece. But you're a strong little colt. You are capable of surviving."

I liked to believe that I can survive on my own. And I did survive this time . . . . . . . . . not exactly thanks to her.

I finally started feeling all my strength back. I stood up and just sat on my bed.

I noticed being wrapped in even more bandages than first felt. And my PipBuck was gone too. It was replaced with more bandages. She noticed me looking at where it used to be.

"I had to take it off. You had your light on it the whole time, it was overheating. I wish I could have done something about that scar though."

She was off course referring to the one that Deadtrott gave me, back there when he struck me in that tunnel. Apparently, when radioactive Ghouls hit you hard enough in the face, the scars are permanent for some reason. This was certainly was, just like the damage on my nose I had since I was a little kid.

My neck however felt heavier. I thought that maybe all this medicine was giving me side effects, because my slave-collar felt heavier.

I touched what I had on my neck, but it didn't felt like rusty metal and wires. I felt more soft and plushy bandages.

"Don't worry Gideon. You are no longer under anypony's leash."

She said that to me as she levitated the old detached collar with her magic, showing me that it's no longer around my neck.

I admitted that it was quite a nice and memorable view; seeing that ticking leash detached, no longer around my neck, no longer controlling my life. I've led out a small grin on my face.

It almost made up for her sending Deadtrott to save me.

She had still to explain everything though.

"Your 'friend', the trotting corpse back there, he didn't make it easy for me at all."

This was a hint for her to start explaining everything. Just like she promised she would in that message.

She than changed her face from "happily relieved" to "shamefully concerned". Normally kids should have some worries about upsetting their Mothers, but I wasn't a normal kid, and this was not a normal situation.

I was just so turned off with this whole scenario that I was rotting in a slave-town of Raiders, while it took her 8 years to come send SOME help. She sends somepony who could have just as well killed me.

"Gideon . . . . . . I am aware how bad it was. You think Deadtrott keeps a secret what he does? He told about all the times he hurt you. And the way he described Out Town, it sounds like it's really gotten worse since I left that terrible place."

She was close to crying.

"When you were born, the Raiders immediately saw that as just another pretty audition to their population of slaves. I tried my hardest to protect you then, but just a few days before you've turned 2, they sold me to other slavers as soon as the chance came. They didn't even offered that much caps, they just sold me, because they wanted to watch me beg."

Maybe she began that description, because she wanted to me to sympathize. And while I would sympathize to ANYPONY who like lived in Out Town, I still remembered what she said in her message. "I don't expect you to forgive me", and I honestly found it difficult to forgive her.

"I don't need another description of the pain and misery I am fairly acquainted with."

I might have pushed her a bit. She led out some tears. For reals this time.

"The slavers that I belonged to then weren't better. I managed to brake from their clutches only after 3 years. And their deaths were the only way to get free."

It's true that the best way to get your freedom is by killing those holding your chains, but at least I knew that my Mother was apparently a fighter like me, since she killed HER chain-holders.

"I then spent another 3 years to gather my strength, knowledge, and skills to get back to you. And to find some place, or group in the Wasteland to belong to. I wasn't gonna free my son just to raise him nowhere."

It sure took her long enough. I thought of saying that to her, but I then thought that maybe I pushed her hard enough. She WAS giving me the promised explanation afterall.

"While I DID considered places like New Appleloosa and even Friendship City, the Lookouts found me first. I told them everything about me and you. But all they offered, was sympathy. They doubted that you were still alive after all this time, and they only THEN learned about Out Town. From me. They scouted it once from a distance, but the defenses, and the numbers of the Raiders, they were all too big. They just gave up on a fight they knew they wouldn't win."

The Lookouts clearly were too busy saving the OTHER less fortunate, if they gave up on everypony in Out Town. I believed that they were not as great as they claimed to be, but in time I realized that maybe Out Town IS too much, for anypony.

Afterall, Out Town isn't just a town, it's a damn huge, mazed-up city, fully supplied and fortified.

"And that was all before I met Deadtrott."

Oh, right. HIM!

At this point, I almost forgot that he was even a member of the Lookouts. Now that I could make a comparison, that psychotic bastard could have been more at home among Raiders.

"I know what he is in your eyes, but about him and me, all you need to know, is that I understand him more than anypony else, which is why he eventually agreed to help me. He did it, only because I asked."

"I cannot picture him helping others just like THAT. I just can't" I responded.

"Then don't. I prefer not saying how I earned his friendship."

However she DID, it must have cost a lot. Just being acquainted with him is bad enough.

"Out Town Raiders did business only with Ponies they knew. Talons, Slavers, other such vices. That meant that if I came for you myself, without my most recent 'owners', the first thing they would do is grab new explosive collars for me. And Deadtrott just happened to have connections with Slavers. He agreed to help, and now were here."

Now finally she got to the part of why she didn't come herself. Her explanations were now over, and she began waiting for my response.

I did not know what to think.

The way she explained it all, it really seemed like all the odds were against her. I mean, I barely had any odds on my side. And would I have done better if I was in her position? I wouldn't know, I never cared about anypony as much.

Her message clearly stated, "I don't expect you to forgive me". And she also said "I'm obviously not a great mother if I can't protect my own child". Despite where we are now, she really seemed to believe that she still failed. I would have simply responded based on the circumstances that would let me live. But this isn't Out Town.

I had to remember that now for the first time in my life, I was actually safe. This was my new home. My new life, that was long promised to be better.

What would be the point of holding a grudge against somepony who would happen to be your Mother?

Did I really once view Mothers as just people who give birth to you? No.

Other colt slaves like me, they used to cry a lot about how their Mothers were either killed before their very eyes, or how they were separated from their parents. I used to respond to them, "At least you HAD Mothers".

Mothers were guardians and caretakers. They were ponies in your life that would have always been there for you. Hell, in this world, they would be all that you have in your life. And YOU, would be all that THEY have left in their lives.

Should I have really thrown that away?

"I forgive you"

In that instance, after hearing that, Sunlight looked at me and finally stopped crying.

"I am here now. What's the point of remembering the past? Especially one that I wish I never remembered."

I wasn't saying that to make her feel better, I really preferred not remembering my life as a slave.

Moment of silence passed, and then the ultimate sign of relief in both of us.

"Oh Gideon . . . . . . My son."

I thought I saw her now just as happy as she was at the time she first saw me.

She did something, nopony ever did to me. She held me very, very close to herself, almost held her hoofs around me.

"I promise you son, I will never, ever abandon you ever again. I will be a better Mother. We are a family, and with every bit of strength I have, I will protect my family."

She said that as she held me closer and closer to herself. I started feeling this odd warmth in my heart, it made me feel once again, that I was actually loved and somepony cared about me. I didn't had any thoughts at all at that time. I just did the same. I held my mother around her chest, almost trying to reach my hoofs together on her back.

I realized, I actually loved my Mother.

And it took me this long to no longer being surprised by this moment. This was a simple hug. I then let out a few tears too.

At that moment, I officially recognized this mare as my Mother, my caretaker, and my only family in this world.

If only the Raiders would hear me saying all this now. They would call it pathetic and pitiful. Well, I guess that's what family-love is. Pathetic and pitiful. But I will protect it. I will never let anypony take that away from me.

For the first time in my life, I felt like I actually had something for myself that was worth having. And it was worth fighting for. Worth caring about.

Me and my Mother were a family. And I will never let anypony take that away from me. The Wasteland that I started to know more and more, would undoubtedly try to take that away from me. But I will not let it. Will the odds be against me? The odds can go buck themselves, because I am not losing all the love I have left in my life ever again.

From that day forth, I called this mare only one name. I called her "Mom".

_______________________

After wrapping up all the bandages one more time, Mom took me to show me around my new home.

All that I knew about this new home so far is that it is underground, probably very deep.

It was quite a place I've never been to, let alone thought I could live at. Concrete walls, metal sliding blast doors, actual electric lights lighting up almost every corner and edge of every room and hallway. I was having the same claustrophobic feelings I had back in that tunnel under the mountain.

Mom lead me through a hallway, probably to introduce me to the Lookouts. The rooms we passed were even labeled with signs. I'd expect them to be labeled with numbers, but strangely they were instead labeled with pictures of different colored round 'things', with lines underneath them.

"What the hay are those things?"

Mom got kinda confused as I asked the question, thinking I was referring to the doors. But then she lead out a grin on her face and answered. "They're called balloons. It's . . . kinda of a long story. It's just another funny object from before the war"

Probably ones we'll never see again. The minute she used the description 'from before the war' I immediately gave up interest in those, 'balloons'. It DOES sound like something from the times before the bombs, having such a weird-sounding name.

Finally we passed the last door into a large room. This one for a change had the ceiling a lot higher, but that's not what got my attention.

The weird balloon-thingies was odd enough on those door-signs. Now I just entered a room chuck-full of even weirder stuff that just had "before the bombs" written all over it.

Now I was in a room where a bunch of actual balloons were lying around everywhere, mostly scraped into corners. Aside from that, there were strange pieces of plastic hanging from the ceiling, all shaped like weird animals, and I mean even weirder than ones you meet in the Wasteland, so much that they look ridiculous. All the other stuff that were around here were even weirder and harder to describe.

"Believe it or not Gideon, these things were once part of something that always brought joy and happiness into Ponies. A Party"

I always imagined that if I were to actually see the world before the bombs, I would not recognize it, but this? This was the absolutely weirdest shit.

But the biggest thing in this room was something I DID recognized. The Flag of the Lookouts. Just like I saw those guards back there having on their shoulders. A crossed white rifle and white horn of a unicorn, with three white stars around them all on a grayish-blue surface.

Underneath this giant banner hanging on the wall right below the ceiling, words were written, all in different colors.

Red, "Loyalty". Orange "Honesty". Green "Generosity". Blue "Laughter". Pink "Kindness". And Purple "Magic".

This looked way too important. "Magic" probably wasn't referring to the kind that all Unicorns use. And all these other words written there, I assumed they were part of the Lookouts motto.

"Sunlight!" I heard someone shout, an almost authoritive sounding voice. I assumed somepony in charge.

Several other Ponies approached us. Some Unicorns, some Earth ponies. They all wore something that I assumed was some unusual clothing that all Lookouts wore. And just like those soldiers I saw before, they all had some technological goggles and the same pictures either on their shoulders, helmets, or torso's. The Lookouts banner was everywhere, right next to all the weird shit I couldn't describe.

Some of them looked a lot older than Mom, some even looked like they were the same age. But the oldest, and also the biggest stallion that approached us seemed to have been the leader.

"He's the one, isn't he?" the bald, blue coated unicorn with big green eyes asked. While all the Lookout soldiers had just small pictures of the Lookouts flag on their clothes, he wore a huge metal armor on his chest that had the flag painted on it. He wore underneath a dark leather armor, covered with a bandolier full of ammo.

"Yes Erwin." My Mom answered to the big guy "This is my son, Gideon."

In response, the big stallion smiled looking at me and said "Well of course he is. You have your Mother's eyes kid."

I would have thanked, but the smile he expressed made the guy look so damn welcoming I almost couldn't believe again that somepony cared about me. This one looked like he could easily brake me in half with one hoof, and he just appears so friendly and happy.

He then responded again to Mom.

"I got a few boys working on his cabin so he can rest. He really looks like he's been through enough."

The suddenly one of the soldiers behind him spoke.

"Yes Colonel, now that you actually see one of the worst doings of those bucking Raiders, maybe you'll consider actually taking some actions against that hell?"

The 'Colonel', whose name I now knew was Erwin, didn't took that very well.

"Soldier! We've already been over this time and time again. Now until the next Council meeting, I don't want to hear another word about it! Understood?"

This soldier was dismissed and responded equally not well.

"Yes, SIR."

So these Lookouts had some kind of council too? They were certainly a well organized bunch.

Then the unicorn approached me and bent his hoofs a bit so that our heads would be on the same level. He even had the decency to not look down on me like all who owned me always did, to remind me my place in the dirt.

"Gideon, it’s my pleasure to meet you. My name is Erwin Mustang. I am the leader of the Lookouts. And I guess there's nothing better I can say than 'Welcome to our home', which is now YOU'R home as well."

One of the mare soldiers behind him then spoke after I remained silent for a while.

"From the report that the twins gave us about Out Town, I wouldn't be surprised if he never heard of the term 'Thank you'."

I WAS actually familiar with the term. But it barely occurred in my life to say it, and actually mean it.

All the 'goodness' and 'politeness' was rubbing off on me, I realized as I finally spoke to Colonel Erwin.

"Don't misunderstand me Mister Colonel Erwin. I DO thank you for this welcoming."

He continued smiling in response, and then turned back to his soldiers.

"You go ahead, I'll be right there. Let me just show our new face around."

They responded "Yes Colonel" with a nod.

"Come, I'll show you to your room." He told me while pointing me to the door from which I first thought he and the soldiers came from.

Me and Mom followed him and as if him being bald wasn't weird enough, he apparently also didn't had a tail. I'm sure there's a story involving danger behind that.

Right before entering another hallway, I took one last look at that giant banner. I took a bit more attention at those words inscribed.

"Those words?" I asked "On that banner back there, they are the some kind of motto of the Lookouts?"

He looked back for a second.

"You could say that." he answered "How much do you know about how the war went?"

I seemed to have grown fond of questions being answers to questions.

"What's there to know?" I said "Before the war, this world was named Equestria. Everything is beautiful and preachy. Then the Zebra's come out of nowhere, they fight over the resources with Ponykind, they create bigger and stronger weapons and both races end up blowing each other up."

Mom showed a bit of concern in my answer. That was basic knowledge, and at that moment it turned out that there's more that I didn't know. Colonel Erwin was making it all clear to me now.

"You want to understand what exactly these words mean to us? Kindness, Laughter, Generosity, Honesty, Loyalty, and Magic? We need to take you back a bit, to before the bombs fell."

It seemed like the road to my room was a bit long, so he had enough time to tell me everything. But he still lead us at a slow paste.

"At wars, soldiers do what their leaders tell them to do. And what seemed to have the most authority in the Pony Army, were the Ministries.

They were 6 pre-war governmental institutions that helped Ponykind fight back. Each of those institutions were covering certain particular subjects.

There was the Ministry of Arcane Sciences, which studied and researched magic in general, and invented ways of using it for the war effort, be it in counter-offensive or attack.

Ministry of Image, that pretty much handled Propaganda. Turns out, propaganda and war go together like a pistol and an ammo magazine.

The Ministry of Morale, that covered exactly what it says, Morale.

Ministry of Wartime Technology, that produced most of what are today's instruments of survival. They were once meant to be the instruments of defense, turned out to be the co-creators of destruction.

There was also the Ministry of Peace, which despite its name, had only the purpose of producing and researching medicine.

And there's the Ministry of Awesome. Nopony really knows what was the purpose of that ministry. From the name most assume it was just formed by its director so that she could show off her skills or something. But in deeper research we discovered it was actually an operation specializing in infiltration and espionage."

This was all complex, but I understood most of it, and I paid attention remembering him saying that I need to know this, if I wanna know what the lookouts believe in. I thought I had to know that, if I was now basically one of them.

We passed one soldier on our way, and we took a turn to the left and then to the right as we trotted. But just as we reached another door, he finally got to the point.

"Well, I bore you with enough advanced history of the war, but what's more important are the directors of all those ministries. They were simply known as the 'Ministry Mares', but, but what's more important, is what they represented before the war."

He told me that just as he finished typing a keyboard next to the door, and it opened to us very slowly. The rooms and hallways we passed might have been fairly well lighted, but I was almost blinded by the light that stuck out for a while as the door opened.

We were in another even bigger main hall, than the one before, and it also had all those balloons and weird toys around. We were now on a higher floor, almost a balcony, and below us I saw a bunch of other Ponies.

This place has now become the polar opposite of Out Town.

Everywhere I looked below, I saw Ponies together. Not in a Slave-and-Raider-way. No, I saw little colts even younger than me in the company of older Ponies. Kids and families? Now I may have counted only like three families down there, but that few were still surprising. In my time in Out Town, I could barely picture one image of a happy family, least of all my own.

"How many Lookouts are there exactly?" I asked old Erwin as I finished admiring the view below me.

"There are only 23 of us now, including you. But what you see down there, they are mostly Ponies who are no longer fighters. They are families protecting what little they have left, just like your Mother."

There was some concern in his answer. For a group that's dedicated to the idea of helping the entire Equestrian Wasteland, there didn't seem to have been that many of us.

"How many Fighters ARE there in this group?" I asked.

Erwin answered, this time with more confidence, "Including me? 12. That's why most of the Wasteland doesn't know about us. We don't make ourselves known to any villainous factions out there, until were stronger. For now we mostly operate either from a distance, or silently."

That made sense to me, but as we continued our walk towards "my room", we then went back to our previous topic.

"And those 6 Ministry mares." I asked "You said they represented something before the war."

"Yes they did" he answered as if he didn't forget our topic. "Before the war, there was a different threat to Equestria. Some evil Alicorn Pony became consumed with power and tried to use it to cause eternal night. The 6 mares, with the help of magical elements defeated the evil villain."

Mom then continued for him.

"Those elements were called 'Elements of Harmony'. They were very powerful magic artifacts that helped sustain harmony within Equestria. Their origins date back just as long as the origins of Equestria itself. And each of them represented exactly what you saw written on our banner. Honesty, Kindness, Generosity, Loyalty, Laughter and Magic."

I thought to myself something must have happened to them, if 'today' happened. So I asked a good question.

"What happened to those elements?"

We stopped before some stairs leading down to the floor where the families I saw were.

"Nopony really knows what happened to them." My Mom answered "But given everything that's happened since their last use, it's wildly assumed they were destroyed. Hell, some doubt they ever existed at all."

Then we began going down the stairs and Erwin spoke his last sentence in this conversation.

"But whether they existed or not, the 6 Ministry Mares represented what their Elements were told to represent even at the time of war . . . . . . for a time. But, I- . . . . WE, the Lookouts, we believe that those were indeed the key to Harmony, and that fighting for that Harmony WILL in fact play a large role in re-building this world. If not to what it was before, than at least to the best that it possibly can be now."

The way he said it, and how confident he was . . . . . Erwin truly believed that Harmony can be achieved.

"But well, that answers your initial question. You shouldn't really concern yourself with all this. The Lookout Soldiers are the ones doing the job. All you have to do, is . . . . . . well, just LIVE. You have a family and a home now. Enjoy them."

Those were his dismissive words as he finally came back upstairs, back to his business.

Mom finally continued to lead me to my room.

We were walking pass the families and they all started looking at me. Some were shocked to see my bandages. But one mare, who was standing there with a unicorn colt as young as me said "Welcome to our Home".

The gaze that the colt standing by her gave me, was oddly resembling curiosity. The colt had a light-blue coat, and a dark mane, but he was cutie-markless, like me.

With a closer look, I've seen all the older folk to actually have cutie-marks. I would have given more focus to that sight, but I was still kinda tired.

Eventually we stopped by a door that was among many other doors to what I assumed were homes for each family.

Mom opened the door after punching the numbers on a keyboard, and turned on the lights.

This new home for me, was indescribably better than my old home in Out Town, with every next minute. There were big comfortable sofas around an elegant table with no scratches, a shiny sink, a refrigerator, a few shelves, and a comfortable bed.

"I used to live in this home all alone." she said that to me as we entered. "But knowing that I will soon be reunited with my son, I did some re-furnishing."

Turns out that the bed in THIS room was hers, because she then opened a door to another room where there was more furniture.

"Now that I have my son back, I want to keep him close to me all the time. This is your room."

I almost couldn't comprehend the thought. A big comfortable bed with soft, spotless pillows, a nice desk, another working sink, some lockers, and a drawer, all mine.

"Come on, let me take a look at your wounds."

I sat on that bed. No bed I ever sat on was more comfortable.

Mom was unwrapping some of my bandages and covered my wounds with some medicine she was pulling out of her handbag. She used, only her magic. Luckily she mostly had good news.

"Give it a few hours and some rest, you'll be as good as new."

Colonel Erwin wasn't here, and I honestly wanted to chat a little with my Mother.

"What is this place anyway?"

"Oh, you remember the Ministry Mares?" She answered, as she continued working on my wounds "This place was built by one of them. The Director of the Ministry of Morale was the bearer of the Element of Harmony that represented Laughter."

"She was actually a normal pony like all of her friends that also used the other elements. But she spent her normal life delivering laughter to all around her. For her, smiling was all that you needed to do to be happy."

"She did it by constantly throwing parties for everypony. Some of the weird objects you saw here, were party props that were once most often used. And this place existed even before she and her friends found the Elements of Harmony. She used this place to plan all of her parties in places where they'd be most needed."

"But when the war began, she expanded it, built it to also serve as a shelter just in case. You know the rest."

A whole giant hideout that only served the purpose of preparing parties? It sounded silly and weird, but it paid off if this is now my new home.

"Hello neighbors!"

The blue-coated unicorn colt from before was now suddenly at my rooms doorstep. Mom responded politely.

"Hello Switch."

She then went to introduce us.

"Gideon, this is Switch Blade. He and his family live just next door to us. He's almost the same age as you."

"Pleasure to meet you Gideon." Switch Blade said to me as he held out a hoof towards me.

Shaking hoofs was a bad idea in Out Town. I quickly realized I wasn't there anymore, so I returned the shaken hoof.

"Pleasure's all mine."

Right after we finished shaking hoofs, Mom was by that time finished with my wounds. A lot of bandages still had to be kept on, but as she said, in short time, I'll be as good as new. I was eager to find out what it exactly it felt like to feel "as good as new".

"Oh, and Doctor?" Switch Blade than spoke to my Mom "Miss Mama Malory needs her treatment again."

Among those ponies I DID noticed an old lady. He was probably talking about her.

"Yes, I figured that out the minute you came." She responded with a smile. Apparently whatever treatment she had to give to this old Lady, she seemed to have felt pretty competent about it. Maybe my Mom takes pleasure in her work in stopping Ponies from dying?

"Gideon," I listened the minute she said my name "I need to check on our elderly. Why don't you take that time to get to know Switch? I'm sure the two of you will get along fine."

I'm sure my Mother would do everything to make my new life here happy, and having a friend my age honestly wouldn't hurt. So I responded
"Sure".

"I'll be right back" she said before kissing me on my forehead and leaving the room, all while maintaining a smile.

So now I was alone with Switch Blade. It would have all followed by an awkward silence, but I got off the bed and spoke first.

"So, Switch Blade . . . . . what's your story?"

"Hm, probably boring next to yours." He answered as if I was asking a stupid question with an obvious answer.

"I pretty much grew up on the surface for a time with my parents who were just traders. But after we found the Lookouts, my Dad joined their fighters and now I live here with them. I'm nothing special."

Then Switch Blade was getting ahead of himself in this conversation. He got too excited.

"But the things I heard about YOU? Seriously, I bet your time there made you immune to most pain! And travelling that wasteland without your Mother, it must have been quite an adventure!"

His excitement was gonna eventually get on my nerve, so I responded by giving him a scowl. He noticed it, and stopped.

"Oh uh . . . . . look, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have went there, I'm sure it was hard."

If we were gonna be friends, let's not ruin it already in a stupid argument.

"There's nothing exciting about nearly dying! More than once, I might add! But, it's okay, I accept the apology."

He let out a grin, probably relieved that he didn't angered me.

"I'm just glad this is all finally over."

"Hm, well . ." He suddenly continued talking "You better don't say that in front of Colonel Erwin. He always responds, 'it's never over'. He and all the soldiers believe that it is important to be ready for anything, all the time."

That was the Colonel's problem, not mine. I thought of that, but gave a different response to that.

"If he ever WILL be around, I'll make sure to refer to something that doesn't involve combat. Promise you that."

After saying that, I went to check out the sink. I turned on the sprinklers and cold water was pouring. It looked so clean that I couldn't help but drink it. First time I ever tasted water THIS clean, and while water in general doesn't basically have a flavor, I enjoyed the purification.

And while I did, Switch Blade continued our friendly conversation.

"I think I'll consider that term even for things that DON'T involve combat. Like I said, my Father is a soldier, and I will be too, so I need to be ready."

I instantly stopped admiring the crystal clean water and turned back to him.

"A Soldier!? You mean, you wanna fight? Out there? In the Wasteland?"

He came back to his strange smile that resembled fearlessness, a trait I personally often associated with stupidity.

"Well, not like, immediately right NOW. Duh? The Colonel and the others train soldiers. And they do it pretty well. AND he is a good leader, so I'm not scared."

I just found myself a friend, and now I was about to lose him? I immediately responded.

"But, you said that all of your parents are here. This place, it is a great home. Why would you wanna risk losing that?"

"I wouldn't!" He responded "Because I would train hard, and fight even harder, just like my Father. We both know that this world, is 'kill, or be killed', and I will NOT hold any middle ground!"

I sighed and finally responded less politely.

"Suit yourself."

I can't say I didn't expect his response. He wasn't very pleased.

"What? You think I'm crazy, because I want to stop Ponies from dying?"

He continued his speech.

"I mean, YOU have been out there, you saw what kind of hell this world is." He went back to a topic I didn't want to discuss, but I felt so strangely convinced by his words that I didn't know what to say.

"But it's just like the archives and the history says, it once took only 6 normal ponies to make all the difference. If at least one life, mine, can do SOME difference that I want to take it! You sw more than I did, you experienced MORE than I did, so maybe you have a good reason to doubt in fighting, but I haven't seen the horrors yet, and until they drain me, I will do some good in this world."

He suddenly sounded like Mother on that message she sent me. It was all about helping others again. Ones that I instantly realized actually DON'T have it as easy as us.

When I thought about all the crazy shit that tried to kill ME in the past, Feral Ghouls, Raiders, Slavers, Alicorns, when you put it all together, it could really seem like in this Wasteland, life decreases with each next day.

But I still wasn't about to approve of the idea of fighting. Perhaps I just doubted evil can be defeated like those 6 Ministry Mares did, or maybe I was just scared shitless?

"The whole motivation of the Lookouts, is it really all just the idea of helping those who right now as we speak are not as lucky as us? And never expect anything in return?"

I asked him that question as I looked away into a corner. He responded with a lowered voice. Maybe he realized he might have overreacted a bit.

"Uhm, well yes, but . . . . . . . Look if I overreacted a bit, I'm sorry. I'm just tired of everypony thinking that helping others is a joke. I mean, me and my parents, THAT'S how we survived, thanks to Ponies like the Lookouts, ponies who helped because they just knew we needed it."

"They didn't send any for me." That was part of the truth, and I said it.

Switch seemed surprised by the thought, but immediately said, "Y-yeah . . . . . Yes, I've heard. Than . . . . . I suppose you have pretty good reasons not to fight."

And this was part of the overall conclusion. He had his own personal crazy believes and motives to fight just about ANYTHING out there. And I had pretty good reasons NOT to. But whenever the mind struck me, whenever I remembered myself in Out Town. When I pictured myself the way I was, I also see the faces of other slaves that were there with me. And it was generally known that Ponies everywhere out there suffer. Some might actually suffer as badly as I did. And what can I do? I can just sit here, not giving a damn, but . . . . . . . . . . . . . . sitting and not give a damn. Who did that remind me of?

Raiders. Whiplie, Bloody Blade, all of them. That's what THEY would have done.

As I realized that, everything seemed to have changed.

I suddenly clenched my teeth very hard. Imagined I looked as angry as I ever was.

I turned around facing Switch one more time.

"You won't be training alone. I want to fight too."

He seemed surprised by that.

"WHAT!?"

I explained to him my answer. Suddenly it was my turn to give an enormous long speech.

"It's like you said, I saw most of the crazy shit that's going on out there. And you're right, experiencing it myself already IS a good reason not to fight. But guess what? I am not tired yet. I have NOT lost all my strength and will to fight. What's good wasting it here? I will only loose it when I'm dead. And the Wasteland will have to throw in a lot of itself to kill me! I suffered my Hell, and now I'm out of it. But meanwhile dozens, maybe hundreds of Ponies out in the Wasteland are battling theirs! And there are other Ponies who all they do is laugh at them. Raiders, Mercs, Slavers? Thieves and Murderers ALL OF THEM! They made the Wasteland their home, where they can do whatever they want. But before long, all of them will grow to regret their selfish actions."

Switch Blade was still surprised for a second, but then he immediately cam back to his usual smile.

"I KNEW you were a fighter. I mean, you'd have to be pretty strong to survive all this, and still fight."

I responded with a joke "Or crazy like you."

We both in response shared a short laugh.

It might seemed then that his long speech about doing the right thing lit a fire in me. But that wasn't the truth. The truth was, his speech only made me realize what I was originally planning, which was nothing. But then I suddenly remembered all the unfair pain I've been through. And that meant that my sudden motivation to join the Lookouts, was not the sense of doing the morally good thing, like Switch Blade wanted. No, the truth is, the bigger motivation I had, was hatred. I've seen what the Raiders, the Merchs and the Slavers were, and what they did. I as a victim of all those things, did not want to stay that way.

The door to my room then finally opened.

"I'm back" Mom announced her return.

It was obvious that I had to tell her about my decision. I didn't want my new friend Switch to be blamed for it.

"Anyway Switch, it was nice chatting with you. Could we talk more later? Me and my Mom have a lot to talk about to."

He agreed and left.

I sat back on the bed, and noticing it, Mom sat right next to me.

"I'm glad you and Switch get along."

The door behind him closed, and now it was time to tell her. She HAD to know.

"Mom. I think I already get the whole picture of why the Lookouts do what they do." I started the explanation easily. I didn't want to rush immediately to it. "They fight because the Wasteland just simply needs somepony to fight for those who don't have it easier. It's just like you said in that message. The Ponies of the Wasteland have been bleeding long enough, and you bring light and hope to them."

Those were her exact words in that message, and she didn't deny it.

"Yes, we do."

I finally said it, and unsurprisingly she reacted with a shock.

"Mom. I want to join you and the other Lookouts in that fight."

"What!?" She asked loudly "But- No! No! I won't allow you!"

"Mom, you're basically in this fight too! And I can fight , I know I'm capable!"

"But Gideon, You've been there, you'll be killed!"

She was hoping this would convince me, but it didn't. I didn't want her to convince me.

"Mom, I know. I know that surviving the Wasteland is hard, but does that mean that it should be hard for everypony? Mom, my whole life, I was nothing but a slave. All I ever did was what others force me to do. Now I am a free pony, but not only that. Now I also have a chance to actually help others. While I was a slave, I never cared about anypony's fate but my own. I was selfish, and careless. But I don't want others to end up like me. I may still have a Mother, but many others are completely alone in this world. It just seemed like such a waste for me to not do anything."

Mom still expressed worries in her face. And it's not like she worried too much. She obviously didn't want to lose her only son again. But how hard she would keep that from happening, I was about to find out.

I continued my speech. This time I said what she would probably have hoped to hear.

"I know this all looks bad. But I'm not doing this so I can be away from you again, Mom. On the contrary, I'm doing this because I don't want anypony or anything to take away from me my family. You did your hardest to protect me. I will do MY hardest to protect our home. Our friends. And us two."

I looked her straight in the eyes as I explained it all.

This time she didn't cry, but was still sad. She looked away a time or two. But then looked at me again. She then moved close.

"Gideon" she said as she was placing her hoof on my cheek. "It's just that I have just found you after all these years . . . . . . . I don't want to lose you again."

I immediately responded "And you won't.", I took her hoof with both of mine. "I promise you will NOT lose me. And I will not lose you."

It was a hard moment for my Mom. She just found her son again, and now it seemed like she could lose him again.

"Gideon" She spoke again "It's mostly thanks to Erwin that many of us here have survived for so long. If you want to fight, and I can't stop you, than at least listen to everything he says, and let me be there with you. You are right, I am also in this fight, and if my son wants to be a part of it, then let us fight together. Mother and Son."

Was that bad? That she would do everything to not loose me again? No. So off course I agreed.

I didn't even say it. The response I gave her was a simple smile.

She returned that smile and we had another hug. We made promises to each other, that we would not risk losing each other ever again. Sealed it all up with that hug.

Lastly, Mom have then used her magic to levitate her bag up. She took something out of it. I almost forgot that it existed at all. My old PipBuck.

"You're gonna need this"

She levitated it to my hoofs.

This little gadget was the first gift that my Mother gave me. It can actually be very important for me. So much that I'd treasure it. And I WILL treasure it. It will helped me survive, and learning to use it as best as possible will make me do many things.

"Thank you, Mom."

And so, starting soon, I will begin taking the fight back.

Footnote: Level Up.
New Perk: Slave Rage: You've been pushed around long enough! With the Slave Rage! perk, your Strength is raised to 10 and you gain 50% to damage resistance whenever your Health drops to 20% or below.