It's Always Snowy in Manehattan

Vinyl’s Dream

a play in one act

Dramatis Personae:

Octavia Philarmonica (O), a lesbic cellist, the soloist in the Orchestra of the Conservatoire of Manehattan;

and

Vinyl Scratch (V), a lesbic DJ, a composer of EDM music, having certain renown in the narrower circles of club-goers

Act I

(The stage is set in an urban flat; it somewhat resembles O’s flat, with the exception of a fireplace in the corner of the living room and a chimney that leads nowhere. It is late evening; O is sitting on the sofa, cradling a mug of warm cocoa in her hands. She is curled into a plaid. The door opens.)

V: Honey, I’m home!

O: The joy! The joy!

V: How have you been all day?

O: Oh, I have missed you so much, my love! Come here so I can kiss you.

(V enters the living room in a grey suit, taking off her hat and scarf, throwing them aside, knowing that O would pick them up. She proceeds to the sofa and kisses O on the lips.)

O: Mmm, I’m so happy you’re home. Home’s not home without you.

V: Of course, my love. (Puts on slippers and goes to check on the fireplace.) Going hot and good.

O: Of course it is. How has your day been?

V: Just another boring day at the office. Nothing special. (Yawns and curls into the plaid, taking off her jacket.) Mmm, so warm.

O: I’ve been warming up this place for you. I love you.

V: I love you too. What’s for dinner?

O: Roast beef and a lettuce salad.

V: (Kisses O on the forehead.) My favourite. What’s in the news?

O: Nothing special. Stalliongrad imposing ban on gay adoption. Los Pegasus enjoying a thirty-above-zero winter.

V: Those bastards. (Yawns and stretches.) Good to live in Manehattan, where the winters are always snowy.

O: Of course. (Kisses V on the neck.) With your love by your side. (Stands up, stretching, while V admires her slender form.) I’ll be in the bedroom. Don’t let the dinner get cold.

V: Of course. (Ponders.) Say.

O: Hmm?

V: You think we maybe could-?

O: Oh, sorry, love. Not today. I’ve a nasty headache.

V: Of course. Of course.

(O leaves. V curls up in the plaid and watches the fires die in the fireplace. Laughs, then raises her eyes to the ceiling.)

V: How is this my life?

Finita!

***

Octavia’s Dream

a nightmare in one act

Dramatis Personae:

Octavia Philarmonica (O);

Vinyl Scratch (V);

and other minor contributions

Act I

(The stage is set in a penthouse in an expensive apartment block in Manehattan downtown. O is getting dressed in front of a mirror, while V is trying to cuddle her.)

V: Mm, come here, babe.

O: Not here, not now. Look at this. (Produces a long black dress.) Do you think it’ll fit?

V: Mmhm. (Grabs O’s behind.) Come here, baby, I think we still have time for a-

O: (Frees herself.) Vinyl! Come off it this instant. We have a performance to attend.

(V and O are walking down the night street.)

The mugger: Stand and deliver!

V: Oh! Oh! What to do?

O: (Panicks.) Breathe in, breathe out.

The mugger: Imma cut you!

The referee: Please, provide the hero with a sword.

(Angels descend from the sky, bringing O a shining cello.)

O: (Grabs the cello.) What am I to do?!

V: Octavia, save me!

The Choir: The hero! She’s the hero!

O: I ain’t no fucking hero! I’m just living day by day, trying to find meaning in this meaningless world!

The referee: The hero has spoken. Fight!

The mugger: (Stabs V.)

V: Ah! (Dies.)

O: Nooo! No, Vinyl, my love! (Grabs her.) Vinyl!

Margaret: (Bleeding.) Hey, Octavia…

O: Margaret, my one and only love! What do I do now?

Margaret: Kiss me…

The mugger: (Stabs O.)

O: Ah! The light! It’s going away… So dark… Father? Are you there?

The mugger: I’m here, sweetie.

O: (Screams and wakes up.)

Finita la comedia!