A Gentleman in Training

by Denim_Blue

Chapter Three: Unexpected Bedfellows

As I left the café and headed down Flax Mill Lane, towards my apartment, I took in a deep breath. The late summer air was full of smells of flowers from nearby gardens, along with the delicious aromas coming from nearby restaurants. In another month or so, autumn would be upon Hoofington. I knew this for a fact because not only did the season officially begin in a month, but the weather ponies would actually bring in autumn-weather cold fronts to ensure it did. Taking the uncertainty out of weather was something that I’m sure meteorologists back on Earth had a mix of love and hatred towards, but I appreciated it more than I thought I would. You knew the general weather patterns for the coming week, and any major storms or weather patterns were given a fairly accurate timeframe to occur. If there were any changes made, the weather ponies made sure it was known as soon as possible.

For now though, I enjoyed the summer while it was still around. Hoofington autumns were beautiful, but winters could be downright brutal. I remember Full Bloom once explaining to me while we were out in the Everfree Forest that the rogue weather patterns from the forest often contribute to Hoofington’s weather, and that the ponies adapted their schedules to work with it as best as they could.

“Darren!”

The sound of my name being called out snapped me out of my thoughts. I glanced around and spotted a familiar mulberry-coated unicorn approach me. Huh, speak of the devil…

“Full Bloom?”

Sure enough, it was her.

She looked troubled, and my smile dropped as she got closer. I dropped down to one knee to better talk to her, only to be almost be bowled over as she wrapped her forelegs around me in a hug. “I’m so sorry! I heard about the news at work today!”

It took me a second before I returned the hug as best as I could, patting her back a bit. “H-hey, stuff like that happens. I’ll be okay.”

Full Bloom pulled back, still frowning. “Everyone at work is upset about it. Professor Wild Call let us go home early after we got what we needed done for the day. I think she needed the break as much as the rest of us.” She sighed deeply. “So… how are you doing?”

“Better than yesterday,” I chuckled. “I got a job lined up already, actually.”

The words had slipped out before I could even bite my tongue. I must have had looked worried, or something must have given that away, because Full Bloom’s own expression became concerned. “Something wrong?”

“Huh, oh, no. Just a little stressed, that’s all.”

Full Bloom cocked her head to the side, her eyes studying me for a moment longer before she smiled a bit. “So, where are you working?”

I hesitated, wondering if it might be better to lie. Though, knowing Full Bloom, she’d figure it out sooner or later. The mare had an uncanny knack for calling out someone when they were lying, I had come to learn. “You’re not going to believe me.”

That got a reaction out of her. She blinked several times, then whispered. “Are you part of the Canterlot Secret Service?”

“What?” I chuckled. “No, no, nothing that cool… if it actually exists.” I let out a breath. “I’m going to be working for Gentleman for Mares.”

Full Bloom blinked once. Her mouth slowly went slack, then the corners of her lips lifted as she smiled. She let out a laugh. “You almost had me there.” After a few seconds of silence from me, her eyes widened. “Oh… wait, you’re serious, aren’t you?”

“Yep.”

“I… I’ve heard of that place. They’re sorta like a comfort horse business.”

Now that term made enough sense for me to need no elaboration. “Yeah. That’s what I understand, at least. There’s more to it, though, from what I was told.”

Full Bloom sighed. “Well, that’s… unexpected.” She smiled, but it looked forced. “You’re okay with it?”

“I’m coming to terms with it. It’s not like I’m being forced into it.”

She frowned. “You’re sure? You shouldn’t do anything you’re uncomfortable with.”

“I’m… yeah, I’m okay, Full Bloom. Just a little antsy, I guess. I mean, given the nature of the work I’ll be doing, it’s…”

“Daunting?” She suggested.

“That’s actually a great way to put it, heh,” I chuckled. “I mean, I’ll be honest, I’m no Chris Hemsworth, so I’m not sure how well I’ll do with playing the role of an attractive male human.”

“Chris Hemsworth? Who’s that?” Full Bloom asked. “Wait, is that one of those human celebrities I hear about from Mel all the time?”

“Y-yeah…” I sighed. “I suppose he’d be the human equivalent of one of your popular Bridleway stallions, but less hooves,and an Australian accent.” I paused. “Are mares into accents?”

Full Bloom smirked. “Honestly, Darren. I don’t think comparing yourself to celebrities is fair. You’re not ugly, if that’s what you’re trying to say.”

No, I suppose not. Still, my mop of tawny brown hair had always been a tad unruly, and I tended to have a bit of a five o’clock shadow on any given day. I stood under six feet in height, and wasn’t much in the rippling muscles and chiseled jaw department…

… I have been complimented on my ‘soulful gray eyes’ on more than a few occasions, though.

“No, but I’m sure I’ll need to work on my appearance a bit. Probably change my wardrobe, too. I have a few places in mind that specialize in making formal wear for humans. Isn’t there a place in Ponyville that’s pretty familiar with human fashion?”

Full Bloom’s smile fell a bit, but she chuckled softly. “You’re adorkable sometimes, you know that?”

I rolled my eyes. “You’re hanging out with Mel too much if you’re saying things like adorkable.”

“Not my fault you humans are rubbing off on me so much,” she chuckled. Her expression became more serious. “You’re absolutely sure you’re okay with this?”

“It’ll tide me over for now. I’ll… look into something else in time, I’m sure. It’s just that the job market for a biology grad isn’t that huge in Equestria. You ponies kinda have most of this world figured out already.”

“What about rent? Will you be able to cover it with this job?” She asked with a frown. “If you need me to lend you some bits or need a place to stay, I can—”

“Full Bloom,” I said, cutting her off in a gentle yet serious tone. “I’ll be fine. I’m not helpless.”

“I’m just trying to help,” the mare said, scraping the ground as her ears flattened. “You’re a good friend, and it wouldn’t be right to let you fall on hard times without lending you a hoof.”

“That means a lot to me,” I said, placing a hand on her shoulder. “Trust me, though. I’ve been through worse than this. Okay?”

“Okay…” she relented. “Just… promise me that if you find yourself in a tough spot, you’ll talk to me?”

“I promise,” I replied.

“Good, and you better keep that promise,” Full Bloom huffed.

“I can’t tell whether I should be worried or amused by how serious you are with all of this,” I laughed.

“Sorry for caring, geesh,” she grumbled. “It’s just… I don’t know, I guess I don’t know many humans, and… you were one of the first to be friends with me, you know?”

“All I remember was how you and I got stuck studying Equestrian lichen for almost two weeks together, and how many times we just brought our work to that local diner near the park to do our work.”

Full Bloom stuck her tongue out. “I ate so many alfalfa sandwiches during those two weeks…”

I laughed. “Still can’t look at them without getting sick?”

“The alfalfa was slimy and wet and… guh…” She shook her head. “You omnivores have it easy. We can’t digest some foods like you can.”

“Hey, you’re hindgut fermenters, just like us.”

“Nerd.”

“Says one of the leading expert on Botany in central Equestria,” I countered, earning a annoyed groan from her.

“Look, I just wanted to make sure everything was okay. I was actually on my way home when I saw you.” She paused for a few moments, then continued. “So… when do you start?”

“Wednesday. I have a few days off, actually.”

“Really?” She brightened up. “Did you want to grab something to eat?”

“I actually just had lunch,” I replied.

“Oh…” She let out a sigh. “We used to always grab lunch together.”

“Hey, who’s to say we still can’t? It’s not like I’m moving out to Las Pegasus or to the Crystal Empire. I’ll still be here.”

That seemed to brighten her mood up. “Are you free later?”

“I can be,” I answered. “I was thinking of maybe seeing a movie tonight, actually.”

“By yourself?” Full Bloom said with a frown. “Really?”

“Well, I don’t often have a free weekend to myself. I thought of maybe catching one of the movies from an Equestrian film studio.” I chuckled, then added, “Though, it’s always funny watching how you ponies react to one of our films from Earth.”

Full Bloom rolled her eyes, and shook her head in amusement. “I suppose I could spare a few hours and see a film. How about you meet me at the Reel Big Films Theater in an hour and we can see what’s playing?”

“Sounds good. Should I dress up for the occasion?” I asked jokingly.

Full Bloom, to my surprise, just smiled. “Depends. You plan on making this into a date or something, Mr. Halverson?” She winked, then added with a sultry voice, “I hear the back seats of the theaters are perfect for having some privacy.”

I chuckled, only to stop when I took a good look at the expression on her face. Was she… batting her eyelashes at me?

“Uh… what…?”

Full Bloom’s bedroom eyes fell apart as she snickered before breaking into a laugh. “Oh, wow, that was too easy.” She waved a hoof when I arched an eyebrow. “Sorry, I couldn’t help myself…” She let out a final chuckle, her smile never leaving her face as she settled down. “Mel was right, though, you’re easy to tease.”

“Figures.” I said, sounding perhaps a little more annoyed than I intended. “Did she tell you to say something like that?”

Full Bloom’s smile fell a little, and she nudged my leg with a hoof. “Hey, come on, Darren, I’m just teasing you.”

I smirked a little, then sighed with feigned exasperation. “I know, that’s all you seem to do to me these days. Makes me wonder what exactly it is you talk about with Mel when I’m not around.” I grinned when her cheeks flushed a tad. “It would make sense that you would talk about me to my ex-girlfriend.”

“It’s nothing like that,” she said quickly.

“Of course not,” I said airily.

“Darren…”

I put up my hands and laughed softly. “Alright, alright.”

Full Bloom let out a snort and flipped a bang out of her eyes. “Anyway, I guess I’ll see you in an hour?”

“You bet. Think they have one of the Power Pony movies showing?”

Full Bloom let out a snort. “I wouldn’t know, but I’m sure that if they do, the movie will have some cute little mare in a tight suit for you to ogle the whole time.”

“This is going to be a thing now that I’m working for Gentlemen for Mares, isn’t it?” I asked, already knowing the answer. I was okay with it, though, truthfully. Full Bloom could be a real stick in the mud when she was doing research and work, but she was a pretty cool pony and fun to hang out with when you got to know her.

She smiled up at me and held out a foreleg, silently beckoning me closer. I grinned and accepted the hug from her as she curled both forelegs around my frame. As I returned her embrace with my own two arms, she hummed quietly in contentment.

“Horns.”

I blinked, thinking I misheard her. “What was that?” I pulled away from her embrace and was greeted with a goofy grin from the mare.

“Horns,” she tapped her own horn as she explained. “Just a little something to remember if you get a unicorn customer.” She then made a gesture with the hoof, going up and down her horn; a kind of gesture you wouldn’t do in front of polite company.

“Um…” I coughed into a hand and stood up, knowing full well my cheeks were probably reddening. “Thanks.”

She giggled. “Try it out, and you can thank me when your client becomes putty in your hand.” She winked, and made her way down the road. “I’ll see you at the theater, okay?”

“Y-yeah, see you at the theater, Full Bloom.”

Full Bloom trotted off, a little spring in her step. She seemed rather pleased with herself, for whatever reason. I had a few ideas, but trying to figure out Full Bloom so far had proven to be a fruitless endeavour, so I didn’t dwell on it.

A little perplexed by my equine friend’s behavior, I continued another block or so before reaching my own apartment on the second floor and unlocking the door.

It was a rather humble apartment, having a small kitchen area, a small living room, a bedroom, and a bathroom. No true air conditioning, unfortunately, but the water and heat were included in my rent, so I had no complaints.

Though, the ‘frost crystal’ contraption that served as an Equestrian equivalent of an air conditioner never seemed to work that well. I had to have the landlord stop by and look it over twice this month alone. She was a nice mare, a widow from a small herd with two grown mares of her own. She knew a hundred and one different ways to fix a leaky pipe and patch up a broken wall, but I wish the same could be said about her fixing magic, crystal-powered machines. Being an earth pony, I can’t fault her on having a bit of challenge in that department. All I knew about it was that if I pressed the blue button it turned the thing on, and the red button turned it off.

Upon entering my humble abode, I walked over to my laptop and turned it on. The internet in Equestria is rudimentary at best compared to what they have back on Earth, but it still allowed communication.

After connecting to what my human friends and I dubbed the ‘pony-net’, I checked my email. Much to my surprise, I had something in my inbox. I checked it over, and smiled. The internet was a bit pricey, but I had reasons for paying the costs. It was one of the few ways I could keep in touch with one of my closests family members.

From: Riley

Hey, so the griffies and Uncle Sam decided yesterday that I’ve earned some leave time and got me a free ticket back to ponyland. The guys are giving me crap about it, but my CO won’t budge on the decision. Seeing as I’m one of only a handful of corpsman on this side of the portal with any experience in working with the griffins, I can see his point. I’ve been busy training them on first aid on the field, but it’s a slow-going process. They’ve been relying too heavily on mages to handle the healing stuff. I don’t blame them, but I keep telling them that it helps to have knowledge on other methods.

I’ll be heading to Hoofington in a few days, probably arrive sometime next week Friday, with my friend Mildred. She’s a griffon soldier like myself, a mage actually, and carries a staff that shoots lightning and casts barriers. Not kidding, she can pull off classic D&D shit, and she’s good at it. She’s awesome and funny; you’d get along with her. Apparently, she’s my guide while I’m on leave since her parents raised her in Equestria, so she’s familiar with the land.

Anyway, if you could meet me at the Hoofington train station sometime around noon on Friday next week, I’d appreciate it. I hate to bother you, but would you be willing to let us crash at your place for a few days? I don’t mind sleeping at a hotel, but Mildred and I have only so much money to spend. Later, bro.

Riley

P.S. - Mildred wants to watch the Lord of the Rings while she’s on leave. Probably heard about it from the guys after a skirmish we had some time ago back during the last few weeks of the Cloven attacks. If you can bust out your DVD set for me so we can watch it, that’d be great. Thanks!

So, my older brother apparently had earned some leave. He had been deployed to the Gryphon Kingdom some time after the initial fights with the Cloven broke out. As a Corpsman, Riley was responsible for treating injured on and off the battlefield, and I know for a fact that he had done a bit of fighting as well. I didn’t know too much about the specifics, since I rarely got to see him these days. Email and the occasional phone call were about all I got, so seeing him face to face was something of a special occasion for us now.

I was a bit surprised that he’d be coming into town with a griffin. His emails rarely talked about the actual violence that he dealt with, but he gave me plenty to be jealous of with how much he talked about the griffins in general. The griffins had quickly formed a deep respect for the Marines that had fought alongside them during the first days of the Cloven attacks. Apparently Equestria’s winged allies have a long history of warrior culture like humans do, so bonding with the Marines made some sense.

To say I was scared back when I found out that Riley would be facing down undead Cloven monstrosities was an understatement. I was still in school at the time, so even if I wanted to go to Tellus with him, that would have been next to impossible for me to afford. Riley was tough, and smart, but he was also the kind of guy that wouldn’t hesitate to put someone else’s safety before his own. It was part of why he wanted to be a Corpsman. Obviously, his training helped keep him from getting killed on a battlefield, and it paid off, seeing as survived the Cloven. That had been some time ago, and as he had said in the email, he now spent most of his time helping with training future griffin medics.

Either way, I was relieved he was still doing well and excited that he would be visiting. I had kept my old futon for this very purpose, after all. For as long as I had been out of college, I had always made sure to have something for my brother to crash on if he decided to pay me a visit out of the blue.

After finding no further emails, I logged off of my computer and hopped into the shower to clean up. By the time I had gotten out and toweled off, I had about forty minutes to spare before I was supposed to meet Full Bloom at the theater.

I looked over my wardrobe selection, and sighed. Sadly, aside from a few nice long sleeve shirts and a polo or two, I had very little in the way of formal wear. My job that had brought me to Equestria in the first place was one that didn’t require office attire, and if anything, it was expected that I would get my clothes dirty while working.

As such, most of my comfortable clothing was either a little tattered, or was far from what one would wear in a formal setting.

Deciding on one of the few pairs of khaki jeans I had and a comfortable, black collared t-shirt, I threw on a pair of loafers I kept for such occasions and headed out, locking my apartment behind me. The theater was only a fifteen minute walk from my place, so I had time, but I liked being early for gatherings. That and I wanted to get a look at what was showing on the big screen. If anything, I wanted Full Bloom to see a real masterpiece from Earth. That or have a chance to see an Equestrian film for myself.

There was also the possibility of seeing a new film that included human and Tellurian actors. There were probably only a dozen or so at most right now, but I knew for a fact that Marvel Studios and DC Comics were in talks with some of the Equestrian comic companies right now.

With that in mind, I picked up my pace. The cinema was beckoning to me, and, be it Earth or Tellus, I was not one to refuse the call.

“You laugh at me now, but you’re going to be eating your own words before we’re through watching this movie,” I said to Full Bloom as we sat down in theater number four. Indiana Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Ark, much to my pleasure, had been brought over to Equestria. I don’t know who paid who for it to happen, but it was worth it.

Full Bloom, who had brushed up her mane and put it in a nice ponytail—no pun intended—rolled her eyes while smiling. In all honesty, while I tried to look at least a little bit presentable for this impromptu night out with my dear friend, she barely had to try.

She snickered at my words, “Coming from you, and just by looking at the poster for this movie, I can tell that you’re being biased here. It looks like a Daring Do knock off. Action, fights, hidden treasure, and a cool protagonist. Right up your alley.”

“A Daring Do knock off?” I repeated. My smile fell away, and I narrowed my eyes. “Take that back.”

Full Bloom smirked. “No. You have a few Daring Do books anyway, so I think I’ve made my point.”

“Daring Do is cool, sure, but she has nothing on Indiana Jones. Has Daring Do ever used a bullwhip?”

“What?” Full Bloom asked with a snort of laughter. “Is that a serious question?”

“Indiana Jones does, and he does it with style and badassery,” I said, giving her a smirk of my own.

“I still think it’s a cheap knock off.” She then added. “Badassery isn’t a word, either.”

“Okay, fine,” I said as the lights began to dim. “If, by the time this movie is over, you’re still not impressed, I’ll buy you dinner.”

Full Bloom arched an eyebrow just before I lost sight of her features to the dark. “Deal…” She paused for a moment, then added. “If I am impressed, I’ll buy us a few rounds at any bar in town after the dinner that we split the cost on.”

“What?” I said. “C’mon, that’s not fair, I still end up paying for some of the dinner.”

“Hey, we never planned on a dinner in the first place,” she countered with a chuckle. “You’re getting free rounds at a bar out of it if you win.”

I frowned. Knowing Full Bloom, she was probably already planning on not liking this movie just to get a free meal from me. Then again, she wasn’t much for lying.

“You’re on the honor system, you know. If you liked the movie, but say otherwise, it’ll come back and bite you in the ass.” Of course, that wasn’t really true at all, but I liked to think karma existed at least on some level.

“Don’t worry, I’ll be honest.” Full Bloom’s patted my hand with a hoof reassuringly. “You sure you don’t want to grab a different seat? Most of the seats are made for ponies specifically…”

I had to admit, the seat I was in could be a bit more comfortable. Sadly, while Hoofington had been rather welcoming to the growing influx of humans, they had yet to adapt to fully adapt to us. I sighed, and looked around in the dim lighting of the theater. “I could go for a large spot, yeah. I feel cramped in this chair.”

Full Bloom looked around as well, then pointed to a spot I could barely make out in the dim lighting of the theater. “There!” She whispered. “Come on, before the movie starts.”

She ended up finding a large seat big enough for two ponies to sit in. Not too different from the loveseats you’d find in theaters back on Earth, the seat was made to be shared by a couple.

“Um…” I looked to her and then to the seat. “You sure this is the—?”

She cut me off, grabbing my hand with her mouth, biting down just enough to get a good grip and pull me down into the large, and admittedly comfortable, seat. “Seriously, Darren, it’s not a huge deal. Besides, it’s a little chilly in here.” Without saying another word, she scooted closer so that she was nestled against my right side.

I lifted up my arm and placed it along the back of the chair to give my arms a much needed stretch, only for Full Bloom to take advantage of the space provided and scoot even closer. I looked down at her, and she gazed up at me innocently. “What?”

“Nothing,” I lied.

I couldn’t see her face that well in the dark, but I could tell she was grinning. “You’re adorable, you know that?”

“What?” I asked, looking down to her.

The screen lit up, but before the movie trailers started, Full Bloom lifted a hoof and gently booped me on the nose and giggled, “Nothing. Let’s just enjoy the movie.”

As we walked out of the theater, I was pleased to see and hear all the ponies who had been watching the movie with us discussing the first Indiana Jones film.

Two older colts, probably in their teens, passed us by and were talking animatedly. “That beginning part when Indiana was walking to get that idol, that was so crazy! It was just like the way Daring Do did it in the Sapphire Stone!”

“What? No way, Indiana Jones was so much smarter about it! He used that sandbag and everything!”

“Pssh, yeah, and he still activated the trap anyway. Besides, she had a harder time getting to the statue, since she had to step on the right tiles.”

I grinned to myself, and couldn’t resist entering their conversation. “Just you wait until you see the third movie.”

The two colts looked up at me. “Huh?”

I kept walking, but spared them another glance. “Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade. It’s the third movie of the series. Just… remember that scene with Daring Do and tiles when you see the third movie.”

As Full Bloom and I continued, I couldn’t help but chuckle.

“You’re such a kid,” Full Bloom said with amusement. “You know what, I’ll admit it: I liked the movie. A lot more than I thought I would.”

“Sorry we didn’t see any Equestrian films like you had suggested.”

“Nah, don’t worry about it. There’s always next time.” She laughed, “It’s crazy, though. I remember reading the first Daring Do novel, and it was a lot like that Indiana Jones film.”

“Freaky, huh? Raiders of the Lost Ark is still considered a great film, and it came to theaters over thirty years ago back on Earth.”

Full Bloom’s eyes widened a fraction. “You’re kidding, right?”

“No, the first film was made in… 1981, I believe.”

Full Bloom just shook her head. “The Daring Do novels have been around for almost… twenty-five years or so now? Maybe a bit more. The thing is, Daring Do aged with the series. In the Quest for the Sapphire Stone, she was still a teenager. I believe with the most recent novel, she’s got to be in her mid forties now.”

“I… wait, in The Griffon’s Goblet, Daring Do and her… mother worked together… wasn’t that the third book of the series?”

“Yeah, it was written about five years after The Mines of Minos,” Full Bloom replied.

I frowned, and thought out loud. “The Last Crusade was released five years after…” I shook my head. “Nope, not going there. Probably best if I stop thinking so hard about it.”

“What’s wrong?”

I just waved a hand. “Don’t ask, otherwise it’ll drive you crazy.” As Full Bloom gave me a confused look, I continued, “So, where do you want to eat?”

“Actually, I’m not too hungry, but if you want we can stop somewhere and you can get something to eat.”

I arched an eyebrow. Full Bloom was a light eater, she always had been. I’d seen her bring a lunch on occasion, but she usually left most of it untouched. Something about how she always ate a huge breakfast before going to work.

Now that I think about it, I can’t really recall a single time I’ve seen her actually eat anything at work. She’d eat in her office, or didn’t eat at all.

“You sure? I don’t mind paying, Full Bloom, you know that.”

Full Bloom’s smile grew a little. “You’re sweet, Darren, but I’m fine.” I frowned, and she just chuckled. “If it’ll make you feel better, I’d be fine with a large chocolate mocha from the cafe down the road.”

I sighed. “All the caffeine is going to catch up to you one of these days.”

“Three cups a day isn’t that bad, Darren. Hemlock is the one you should be harping on.”

“Yeah, but at least he admits he’s addicted to caffeine.”

Full Bloom pouted cutely. “Please, Darren? Just one teeny, tiny mocacinno for little, old me?” I swore I saw her eyes water up with tears.

“Fine, fine, but only because you liked the movie.”

Full Bloom awarded me with a giggle and a cheeky grin. “You’re the best!”

After a late lunch consisting of a vegetarian sub that had more kinds of vegetables than I thought possible on a sandwich, Full Bloom and I headed to the park to kill some time. The sun was on its descent through the sky now, but it was still in the sky, and the bars would open for another two hours.

“So, uh, Full Bloom…?”

“Hm-hm?” she asked, drinking her large cup of mocha through a straw, her magic holding the drink in front of her with a glow of green light.

“Were you… joking about that thing you said earlier today?”

She gave me a knowing look, but asked, “What thing?”

“Horns,” I said, clearing my throat. “Is it true that if I touch a unicorn’s horn, it’ll… you know, turn them on?” I scratched behind my ear and looked away from her. “Er, sorry, maybe I shouldn’t—”

“Yep, it’s true. Well, every pony’s a bit different, but yeah, I’d say that’s a common erogenous zone for unicorns.” She giggled as my cheeks flared up. “You don’t need to be so shy about it, Darren. For Luna’s sake, you’re going to be tending to mares for a living starting next week. Heck, if you want I can let you borrow a few books of mine.”

“What, you have a book collection on sex tips for Equestrians?” I asked, half-jokingly.

“Four of them, actually, yeah. One is on pegasi, one covers different position combinations between all three tribes, and the other two are sort of a general advice books on how to spice up romance.” She flushed a bit when I gave her an odd look. “I… had some bad dates in the past. Figured I’d read up a bit on the topic and see if anything would help. They’re useful, but I haven’t had much of a chance to test anything that I’ve learned from them.”

Well, why not? I nodded. “Yeah, I’d actually appreciate that. Whatever books you think might help, that’d be great.”

Her grin grew. “Cool, remind me later to lend you them, then.” Full Bloom’s smile grew devious as she added with a bit of a huskiness in her voice. “Soon Gentlemen for Mares will be paying me for giving them the greatest Gentleman of all time.”

I snorted with laughter. “And your true motives are revealed.” Her feigned, sinister cackling only spurred me to laugh louder. “Thanks, though, Full Bloom, you’re the best.”

“No problem, Darren. It’s what friends do.” She walked a bit closer, and nudged me with a foreleg. “But back to your original question, yeah…” She tapped her own horn delicately with a hoof. “You know how the horn is full of nerve endings?” I nodded. “Well, that makes it sensitive. Get a mare or stallion all raring to go, and just brushing it with a hoof, or in your case, fingers, will more than likely feel amazing to them. Just… be sure not to set off an involuntary magical expulsion. Last thing you want is some raw magic hitting you in the face.”

“Has… that ever happened?” I asked, not liking the idea of a bolt of magic smacking me at point blank in the mug.

“Not to me, but… yeah, you hear about accidents like that every so often. I mean, they’re never really that serious, since magic is influenced by a lot of things, like emotions and the will of the caster. If you’ve got a mare who’s all hot and bothered expelling a hot load of magic on your face, it’ll probably be more embarrassing than painful.”

“A hot load of magic. Thanks, I needed that visual.”

She just chuckled. “Hey, if that ever happens, let me know how it goes for you. It’d probably be good for a self-help book to sell to stallions having trouble pleasing their mares.”

“Not exactly what I’d like to be known for if I were to become a renown author, but I’m sure you’d sell them like hotcakes.”

Full Bloom smirked. “Sex sells, but…” She went quiet for a moment. When I looked to her, she turned to face me and said quietly. “Just remember, Darren: sex is great, but it’s not a replacement for the emotional needs of a pony. I’m pretty sure the same goes for humans, doesn’t it?”

I smiled, and gave a nod of agreement. “Yeah. You know, you never struck me as being so wise on romance. You sure you’re not leading some sort of double life as a sex therapist?”

“Ha!” She barked out a laugh. “I haven’t had a relationship with anypony in years, so no, I can assure you of that. I’m a bit out of touch with some of the stuff that you’d need to know for that line of work.” Her smile softened as she looked ahead. “I’ve had stallions and mares that gave me some wonderful nights in the bedroom that rocked my world. There were also ponies I dated who knew next to nothing when it came to sex.”

“Go on.” This seemed like a personal thing for her, if the way she was starting to fidget had anything to do with it.

“The thing is, it was the dates that treated me as someone they were genuinely interested in, someone they wanted to know better, that stuck with me, not the ones that were good at rutting me.” She waved a hoof idly as she continued. “I won’t lie, though, the rutting was still great.”

I had to admit, this was the first time I’ve ever talked with Full Bloom like this. Usually whenever we were hanging out when not working, it was with other co-workers at a bar or some local establishment.

This was different, but I still was enjoying it. Just… different.

“Sounds like you were quite the playmare back in the day,” I joked.

“Back in the day?” She arched an eyebrow. “You make me sound old. I’m only twenty-eight years old, Darren.”

“I’m only twenty-four, so yeah, you’re a bit older than me.”

She glanced at me, and smirked. “Cute. It’s usually the young, inexperienced males that strut around like you are.” She hummed to herself, then added. “Those were also the ones that usually needed me to show them where to put what when we did the two-way tango.”

Oh, I was so not going to take that lying down. “You know, some might call you a cougar where I come from.”

“Huh?” She cocked an eyebrow, giving me an odd look. “A cougar?”

“Yep. Stalking the young and helpless prey and pouncing when they least expect it.”

For a moment, I thought I might have gone too far with the joke when I saw her jaw slacken a bit. Then she began to laugh, and we had to stop so she could calm down.

“Okay, that’s a good one.” She sighed, a small giggle escaping as she shook her head in amusement. “Well, there’s plenty of those in Equestria, then.”

“A land full of ponies and predators, huh?” I let out a dramatic sigh. “I may not make it with this job, then.”

“Nah, you’ll do fine,” Full Bloom said, and she sounded rather sincere. “It’s Gabe I’d be worried about.”

“He’s dating a mare, apparently.”

“Really?” She smiled brightly at that. “Good for him, he needs a girl in his life.”

“Yep, an earth pony named Amber. I actually met her briefly earlier today. She seems nice.”

Full Bloom tilted her head to the side, and gave me an odd smile. “Earth pony, huh?” She let out a thoughtful hum, and continued down the path leading out of the park.

“What?”

“I always had Gabe pegged as a guy who would be into unicorns.”

“I don’t try to peg Gabe down to anything. He’s unpredictable, even after spending years knowing him.”

“Well, regardless, I’m sure you boys will do fine in the business.” She nodded towards a street as we walked out of the park area. “Come on, I know a great place that’s begun catering towards humans that you’ll love. They’ve got these shots of alcohol called a yay-gurr bomb or something. Apparently they’re popular in your country.”

Jäger bombs? I paled only a little as my mind flashed back to my not-too-distant college days. In hindsight, I never really liked those drinks, but I was young, and admittedly stupid. Alex and Gabe’s influence probably didn’t help me much during my moments of blissful intoxication, either.

“So many missing sweaters…” I said with a wistful sigh.

“What was that?” Full Bloom asked.

“Just me rambling,” I replied with a dismissive wave and a lopsided smile. “College memories.”

Full Bloom’s cocked her head to the side again, a curious gaze in her eyes. “I’d love to hear about a few of those memories.”

I smirked, and gave a look that said, ‘You sure about that?’, which she replied with a simple nod.

“Well, let’s see. There was one time that Gabe, after getting fairly drunk off of tequila, decided to run through campus one night in late December, right before school let out for the holidays…”

I learned a few things about Full Bloom while we were at the bar she had found.

First of those things that I learned was her fondness for cider. By fondness, I mean that she is able to put away six or seven bottles in an hour period and is still able to walk a relatively straight line. It was sort’ve scary to see her pounding away the bottles while I was nursing my second bottle of Guinness. She had a Jäger bomb or two before dipping into the cider, mind you.

It was Sweet Apple Acres cider, and aged a bit, too. Say what you want about ponies and alcohol, the Apple family in Ponyville knows how to make a good, strong cider.

Second thing I learned is that while I still suck at darts, Full Bloom had some level of skill when it came to the game. Full Bloom beat me at every game, and she was happy about that, so it was all good.

Third thing I learned: Full Bloom is a very affectionate, happy drunk, which I had discovered shortly upon leaving the bar right around closing time.

“You’re so warm…” Full bloom said as she nuzzled against me.

Now, blame it on my inebriation, or maybe I had just become so comfortable to her closeness after today, but I ever since we had left the bar, my hand had found itself resting comfortably on her neck, scratching it gently with my fingers every so often. I’m no expert on this stuff, but I’m pretty sure scratching a pony’s neck can be implied as a sign of intimacy. If so, Full Bloom had yet to call me out on doing so.

“Hey,” she began, nudging my leg with her snout. “Let’s go to my place and get those books for you…” She giggled, then added, “... Mr. Gentleman.”

“Lead the way, my lady,” I said with a sweeping, exaggerated gesture of my hands. She raised a hoof to her mouth and snorted with laughter, then lifted her nose haughtily. She flicked her tail, and lightly walked ahead of me with an exaggerated lifting of her hooves with every step. She didn’t make it very far before stumbling a bit, the alcohol having begun to affect her sense of balance a bit.

I caught her before she tumbled to the ground. She laughed as I helped right her once more, “Such a noble male,” she purred, batting her eyelashes.

“I just don’t want to have to carry you all the way back to your place if you knocked yourself out,” I joked, earning a light slap of her hoof to my chest.

“Hmph. Just when you were starting to be nice,” she said, sighing dramatically. “Where have all the good stallions gone? Woe is me, to live a life surrounded by buffoonish colts pretending to be stallions.”

“Aw, c’mon, Full Bloom, you’ll find a stallion some day.” I said playfully. “Any pony with half a brain could see how awesome you are.”

That seemed to give Full Bloom pause. She dragged a hoof across the road while staring at a patch of grass growing between two cobblestones. “I guess…”

“Okay, what’s up?” I asked, getting down on one knee so I was face to face with her. Something I said apparently bothered her, and I planned on rectifying that. “You don’t think that’s true?”

“I…” Full Bloom looked to me and smiled awkwardly. “Not many stallions would consider me an ideal mare. I’m very independent, and I’m not afraid of speaking my mind.”

“I’d say those aren’t really bad things, but go on.”

She chuckled, “Well, most herds require cooperation. I… well, like I said, I can be a bit abrasive. I don’t mind the concept of sharing, and I’m not against intimacy with mares if the mood strikes me, but…”

“You’re afraid you’d tick off someone in a herd and cause problems?” That earned a solemn nod from the unicorn.

Herds were, to put it into a human term, a harem, of sorts. Usually it was one stallion and two or more mares. It was the norm in Equestria, considering that the birth rate for a colt was heavily outweighed by the rate of fillies born. Such things weren’t too alien to me; you see such things like polygamy in the animal kingdom all the time.

Even so, ponies from Tellus aren’t like the animals I know that exhibit polygamy. Ponies have very similar emotional needs like humans, and if you have one stallion whose attention is being stretched between multiple mares… well…

“You’ll find someone. You’re going to catch the eye of a stallion, preferably a really smart one who can appreciate your huge brain, and he is going to fall madly in love with you. Heck, even if he’s already got a herd, I bet you’re going to win over the mares, too. They’ll be arguing over who gets to spend time with you, and—”

“Oh, stop,” Full Bloom cut me off with a weak laugh, then sniffled, wiping her eyes. “You’re such a big-hearted doofus, you know that?”

“I’ve been told something like that. My grandmother said I got it from my grandfather.”

Full Bloom met my gaze once more, and the unshed tears gave an extra sparkle to her vibrant emerald irises. She looked away for a moment, biting her lip a bit, her tail swishing from side to side a little.

“You alright now?” I asked gently. “I wasn’t trying to embellish anything, either. You’re an awesome mare, and anyone who says otherwise is a complete moron.”

When she met my gaze once more, I couldn’t help but feel a warmth spread through my chest. It was pleasant, familiar. “Darren… do…?”

I barely registered the fact that our faces had gotten closer since I knelt down beside her. I could smell the fragrant, tangy, crisp aroma of cider on her breath. I sort of felt bad for her, since I was fairly certain having three Guinness beers didn’t do much for my own breath.

Without warning, Full Bloom closed the distance between us, her lips mashing with mine. I felt electricity run down my body upon contact, but… I didn’t pull away. The kiss was awkward, namely since I was still as stone while she, in her tipsy state, hadn’t aimed quite on target with her kiss. My nose was now a bit wetter, and the fruity scent of fermented apples hung heavily in my sinuses.

Still…

I slowly wrapped my arms around her.

Really? Is this happening?

I gave the voice in my head a moment’s consideration. Full Bloom was my friend. One of my first pony friends, and by far one of my dearest. If we let this go much further, it could complicate things.

It was at that moment that an odd memory from my days as an awkward teenager rang out in my mind. They were words of my Uncle Lenny, who had said the following: Darren, now I know you’re young, but someday you’re going to notice girls. Now, if a pretty little lady tells you she likes you, if you feel the same, you’d best let her know right away or you’ll be kicking yourself for not doing so.

Did I like Full Bloom like that, though? I wasn’t quite sure. Hell, I was still coming to terms with my admission to finding ponies within the realm of being physically attractive. I mean, fantasy novels and videogames that touched upon such topics like other intelligent species interacting with humans was one thing…

This, though? This was a real, living, breathing, and admittedly cool mare locking lips with mine. Well, there was the magic part that came with her being a unicorn, sure, and that was sort of a fantasy novel element depending on how you looked at it…

Right, Full Bloom, okay…

By now, Full Bloom had placed her forelegs on my shoulders to better angle herself. I almost toppled over from the sudden weight, but managed to remain kneeling and support her.

You know what? Why not? If it doesn’t work out, then at least I can say I gave it a try. She’s a nice mare. Hell, she has probably dealt with me better than any previous girlfriend I’ve had, and that’s saying something, considering Mel and I are still good friends.

My hands were shaking—seriously, shaking—as I returned the kiss. I wasn’t sure how it would work, at first, given her snout and facial shape, but… honestly, I found no difficulty in reciprocating her at all.

She let out the softest of moans, and pulled away from my lips, breathing heavily. Her cheeks were flushed, and her tail was flicking from side to side so hard I was worried it was going to snap off at any moment. “D-do you want to go and… and get those books at my place now?”

I could see the hunger in her eyes, a look that was easy to identify despite our difference in species.

“Please,” I replied without thinking.

She smiled, and locked lips with me again. When she pulled away a second time, she was smiling brightly. “I-I’ve wanted to do that for so long now.” She giggled like a schoolfilly as her forelegs squeezed my shoulders gently.

“Really?” I asked, genuine surprise in my tone. “Why… then why—?”

“I wasn’t sure you felt that way about ponies. I mean, I never saw hints of you feeling that way about mares, and given your history with Mel, I thought that maybe you were only interested in humans. When I found out you were going to be working as a Gentleman, though… I…” She laughed sheepishly. “I have to admit, I sort of planned this on the spot.”

I grinned. “You sneaky filly.”

Full Bloom’s embarrassment vanished instantly, replaced with worry. “Please don’t take that the wrong way! I-I wasn’t trying to take advantage of you, Darren, I promise. It’s just, you looked like you needed some company, and… well…”

“It’s alright,” I said in a reassuring tone. “Honest, I’m okay with this. I… seriously, it’s been a long time since I’ve been with someone. It just surprised me, that’s all…”

“I don’t want you to worry about your work, either… i-if this is going to be an actual thing between us, I mean. I’m… I’m okay with you being intimate with other mares—and oh my gosh I’m sounding like we’re already dating—”

I decided to calm her nerves, placing a hand on the back of her neck and pulling her in for yet another kiss. Her words died with a soft moan as our lips met. When I pulled away after several moments of teasing her lips with my tongue, I gave her a soft smile.

“It’s okay. I appreciate you telling me that right off the bat.” I squeezed her neck with my fingers, gently kneading the muscles as she let out a soft gasp from the contact. “I think it’s good that you’re okay with me doing that kind of work, and I love that you’re willing to be upfront with me right away. Communication is key, after all.”

Full Bloom’s smile wavered a bit, but she managed to chuckle. “Thanks…”

My smile grew a little devious, and with dexterity I didn’t think I possessed after drinking a few shots and several bottles of beer, I placed a hand on her back and scooped her up bridal style… or as close as you could get to bridal style when said individual in your arms was a mare.

She let out a whinny of surprise, but it quickly died down. “H-how did you…?”

I promptly lost my balance, and fell backwards, Full Bloom landing on my stomach and knocking the wind out of me.

“Ow…” I groaned.

“Oh my gosh, Darren?!” She got off of me and checked me over. “Are you okay?”

“Fine, fine. Nothing hurt but my pride…”

She clucked her tongue. “You doofus.” I felt the soft tingling sensation of her magic gently lift my head up, and she gave me a half-lidded smile as I regained my balance. “That was incredibly adorable, though. You get an A for effort, Mr. Gentleman.”

I slumped a bit. “So much for giving you your first experience of being carried by a boyfriend.”

Instead of laughing, though, her smile grew mischievous. “You could still carry me…”

By the time we reached her apartment, my shoulders were a tad sore, and my arms were getting weak. Full Bloom, mercifully, used her magic to open the door as I carried her into her apartment on my back, piggyback style. She flicked on a light, allowing me to see where I was going.

I carried her to the bedroom upon her request, and promptly fell upon the bed as she fell into a fit of giggles, bouncing once upon the cushy mattress.

I felt her hoof touch my shoulder, and I turned around to meet her eyes. They were dancing with a fire, and it was only then that I realized I was in the bedroom of a woman—excuse me, mare—and said mare had spent the better part of the last hour making out with me on the streets of Hoofington. Said mare was also showing definite signs of arousal, the way her breathing was just a bit heavier, the fact that her tail was smacking the mattress every few seconds, and the distinct smell of something that smelled like her, but…

I felt my cheeks flare up, and her hoof slowly rested upon my cheek. “Darren?”

“Um… I…” Okay, yes, Equestrian courtship rituals can be a bit fast paced compared to humans in certain cases, and I understood that, but I couldn’t help but feel nervous. It was embarrassing, and I didn’t want to offend her, and it wasn’t like I was a stranger to sex, but—

“We don’t have to do anything if you don’t want to,” she whispered softly, petting my bangs as she smiled at me.

If I wasn’t certain about giving a relationship with Full Bloom a try before, I was now.

“It’s not that… I’m just…” I scratched my neck. “This is happening a bit quickly for me.”

“I understand,” she continued, scooting closer. “I’m not going to pressure you into anything… but I wouldn’t be against taking this further, if you want.”

“You’re sure?” I asked.

She frowned, as though offended by the question. “Darren, if I really cared about you, do you think I’d be pushing you to rut me right now if you didn’t want to?”

“No… and I wouldn’t do that, either.”

Her smile returned. “I’m serious when I say I’ve wanted to be with you for a while. You’re sweet, a bit of a dork, and a bit of a nerd from time to time. That and I honestly haven’t met a mare or stallion who’s so easy to talk to.”

“My Uncle Lenny always told me I have a knack for making any topic sound interesting if you give me enough time to talk about it.”

Full Bloom hummed, and rolled over so she was on top of me, her chest and barrel resting on my torso comfortably.

It wasn’t that much of a surprise when, given the physical contact, and the heat between us, that she managed to cause certain reactions from me. Her hips were wiggling quite a bit, after all…

She arched an eyebrow, a cattish grin forming on her lips as she glanced back to my groin area. “Hmmm?”

I just smiled. “Um…”

“Sorry,” she said, a mixture of teasing and genuine sympathy in her voice. “I… that was a bit unfair of me to do that. I said I don’t want to put you in a corner here. We can just be like this, if you want, no—”

“I never said I was against doing anything else tonight,” I said.

Full Bloom’s eyes widened, and for a moment her tail ceased moving. “Huh?”

I kept my eyes locked with hers and gave her sides a gentle squeeze. That earned a gasp from her, and it was only then that I realized my hands had wandered to her flanks at some point.

“I guess… I guess if my first mare is going to be anyone, I’d like it to be someone I’m comfortable and familiar with.”

Full Bloom’s tail began swishing rapidly once more, and she licked her lips several times as she whispered shakily. “Y-you’re being serious?”

Instead of voicing a reply, I instead reached for her neck with a hand and slowly lowered her in for a deeper kiss. She moaned, and I could feel her tongue begging for entrance. I obliged after only a moment’s hesitation, and was rewarded with what may have very well been the most aggressive session of tongue wrestling I’ve ever had.

Full Bloom was a passionate mare, I had come to realize. It wasn’t too surprising. She put her entire being into her work, to the point where she would become sucked into her research and blatantly ignored anything and everything around her unless you physically tore her away from her work. A highly inadvisable move, by the way, because she would likely reprimand you for doing so with a rolled up newspaper or heavy taxonomy book over the head repeatedly.

The same could be said about her when she made out with someone, I quickly learned. Her hooves wandered my body as she would gently nip at my neck and lips. I did my best to return her affections, but was finding myself overwhelmed.

A good kind of overwhelmed, just to be clear.

I gave her flanks a squeeze once more, a little harder this time, eliciting something akin to a squeal and moan combined into a single, adorable and sexy sound. She pulled away, her eyes gleaming and her smile like that of the cat that had cornered the canary.

It was a little intimidating, but it didn’t stop the smile from creeping across my face.

Her horn gave off an emerald light as she undid the buttons of my collared shirt with her magic. I chuckled as she fervently undressed me, my belt buckle already coming loose as I attempted to pull of the shirt that she was already tugging at.

Before I knew it, I was lying beneath her, my torso and legs bare to the world. Only the thin layer of fabric that was my boxers separated me from the soft fur of her mulberry colored coat.

It was at this point that she gave me a coy smile, and rolled off my stomach while turning around. Her tail flagged to the side a little as her demure smile became a smoldering grin, her marehood exposed for me to take in.

I reached out with a hand tentatively, only to pause and look at her. She raised her eyebrows for a moment and gave me an encouraging, almost pleading nod. So, seeing no reason to delay any further, I placed a hand on her hind quarters and gently ran a finger over her slit with my other hand, earning a shuddering gasp from Full Bloom.

“S-so…” she began, her legs trembling a bit as she gently probed her entrance with my hands, feeling my digits becoming slick with her fluids. “I-I take it you know what’s what back there?”

“Hm, I don’t know… how about you tell me?” I smirked, and slowly sunk a digit between her lips. She went ramrod straight, and gasped loudly.

“Oh, buck!” she moaned loudly. When I pulled out my finger, now soaking in her juices, she looked at me with a grin that promised that I’d be paying dearly for that stunt. “Someone’s getting bold…”

“Well, I can stop if you want me—”

“Like hay I want you to stop,” she cut me off, her tail briefly swishing left and right. “C-could you… with your fingers?”

“Gladly,” I replied, getting onto my knees and pulling her towards me. The bed creaked as we adjusted ourselves, and her breaths came out in steamy gasps as I inserted my index and middle fingers into her marehood. I slowly pumped in and out as she moaned, lifting her rear up higher while her head plopped onto the mattress. She bit down on the sheets as I pushed a bit deeper with every thrust, earning a few squeals of pleasure from her.

“H-harder,” she whispered desperately.

I silently met her request, and her gasps and moans sound became a string of intangible murmurs of pleasure mixed with my name every few seconds. I could feel the heat radiating off her body in waves, and I won’t lie, I was finding my boxers a bit too tight for comfort right about then.

It was then that an idea struck me. It was perhaps a risky one that may earn a reprimand from Full Bloom… but I doubt she’d be truly upset with what I had planned.

Slowly, I dragged my free hand across her stomach, grazing her teats with my fingers and causing her back legs to wobble as she attempted to keep her balance. Gently, I picked her up by the stomach and pulled her up into a sitting position before lying down, her back against my stomach.

“W-what are—ohhhhhh…”

One hand remained draped across her lower belly while tending to her slit as the other began to gently tease her horn. I was going in blind, listening for cues of approval from her.

“Y-yes, mm…” She whimpered, biting her lip as I continued with my ministrations.

So far, so good. She liked it when I ran my finger along the spiral of her horn, it seemed. Teasing the base really got her off, too, as her back legs kicked every so often while she moaned my name.

I boldly pressed my lips to her horn, and gave it a gentle nip with my teeth.

“Mmmmphhhhhh!” Full Bloom squealed and bit down on a hoof. I felt her inner walls suddenly tightened over my other digits as she climaxed without warning. She shuddered a bit, riding out her orgasm as I held her close, feeling her barrel’s rise and fall with every breath she took.

Her mane was a mess by now, her ponytail having come loose, curly strands of her cornflower mane draped over my body. Beads of sweat ran down her body and on to me as she slowly, gradually, came down from her blissful high.

When she finally came to, she laughed weakly. “W-wow…”

I smiled at her remark. That was a promising sign. “So… was that good?”

“Good?” she echoed, chuckling again as she rolled over so that we were belly to belly. “Darren, if I didn’t know any better, I’d say you’ve done this before.”

“I… have had experience with other women,” I replied honestly. “It’s not too hard to adapt. The horn thing was all your fault, though.”

She grinned and gave my lips a lick. “Okay, true, that was my fault for falling into that trap. Good job, though…” She nipped my neck and whispered into my ear. “Loved how you used the teeth, by the way.”

Full Bloom sat up, and I could feel her marehood’s fluids running onto my stomach as she looked down at me. “If you don’t mind… I’d like to try you out, now.”

With an eager nod, I reached for the hem of my boxers, only for her magic to pull my hands away gently as she shook her head. I gave her a look, almost pleading, and she chuckled.

“No. Let me do this,” she whispered, pressing a hoof to my chest and moving it in small circles. “Please…”

Well, how could I refuse such a request?

She slowly grabbed a hold of the hem of my boxers with her teeth and tugged them down past my waistline. Her eyes widened a fraction as she stared at my manhood, standing at attention for her to see.

“Mel wasn’t kidding when she told me about the way human males look compared to stallions…”

Now, Mel was a good friend, make no mistake. However, she could be a little mean from time to time. Nothing too harmful, but…

“Uh, she didn’t say anything too insulting about us compared to stallions, I hope…?”

Full Bloom looked up at me, and chuckled. “Relax. I’ve read textbooks on human anatomy, and she only told me what I wanted to know. Nothing bad.”

“So…?”

“I like what I see,” she answered, returning her attention to my erection. “I’m curious about how this will feel, though.”

“What, Mel didn’t tell you anything about that?” I joked. “Sounds like you two were conspiring to get me hooked up with you.”

“Oh, we had ideas,” she replied, reaching out with a hoof and gently probing my erection, pleased with the groan that she got out of me. “In the end she said if I shake my rear in your face enough you might get the hint.”

Okay, not entirely flattering, but it’s Mel. It could be worse, I guess. “Well, consider the hint noticed.”

Full Bloom just smirked as her horn lit up again. I watched as a gentle green aura surrounded my manhood, and I kid you not I nearly lost it the moment she began to ripple her magic up and down my length.

“Oh shit!” I gasped as I sat up a bit, my hips bucking involuntarily.

She stopped, eyes wide with what I perceived to be worry. When she saw me flush a deeper red in the cheeks and breathing heavily, she grinned. “I take it that’s a good thing?”

I shuddered a bit and nodded. “Yes, I don’t know what you did to make it feel that good, but that was awesome.”

She gained a smug look at that point, and let out a hum. “Well, I’m not an archmage, but I have a decent level of control over my magic. Kind of need to in order to collect samples, make recordings on plants, put up a field to keep insects from biting me, and provide light while walking through dark forests…”

I realized right then and there that I had fallen completely to Full Bloom’s mercy. I was dealing with a mare that knew exactly how to work her magic, and I recalled that she was capable of holding some of those spells for several hours at a time without tiring.

I squirmed involuntarily as she encased her magic around my length once more.

She must have sensed my unease. “You okay?”

“Y-yeah, just… it’s the first time I’ve been telekinetically stroked, you know? It’s not a bad thing, but lots of different stuff I’m experiencing. Your magic’s got a feel of its own to it, and then when you move it around like that…”

She laughed softly. “Such a flatterer…” She smiled. “I’ll go slowly, then.”

“It’s… been awhile for me. Sorry.”

“Don’t be,” she whispered. “I’m enjoying this right now.”

With that said, Full Bloom began to slowly stroke me with her magic. Now, unicorn magic is as unique as the fingerprints of a person or the iris of a human eye. I don’t remember where I read it, but scientists have reported that no two patterns of pony magic, in this case unicorn based magic, will ever be exactly alike. They can be copied to the point of near indistinguishability, but never exact. Something about the frequency, waves, and other measurements used. Humans are still trying to put relatable terms to a lot of the magic in Equestria, but I believe one article referred to these combined factors as ‘arcane’ waves. Cool name, if anything, and I think a few pony researchers like the term.

Scientific jargon aside, a simpler way of putting this uniqueness to words is the feel of magic. Hemlock, for example, in the few times I’ve had him pull me up from the ground or push me away from an animal of some sort in the Everfree, has a rather cool, almost breeze-like feel to his magic. One time a unicorn guard had checked me over after a rather large spider bit me, and his magic felt like being swathed in a blanket of humid air; it was heavy, warm, and dense.

Full Bloom’s magic, probably because of the closeness and the current duration of my exposure to it, was something altogether different for me. It was like having a gentle, electrical current run through me. Not painful, but it definitely could be felt with every pulse. The best I can describe it is like that. A soothing, electric current that relaxed me and made me go rigid all at the same time.

Needless to say, my mind was having a hard time staying coherent.

While tending to my length, she crawled back onto my stomach, and I groaned as I felt the heat from her inner thighs against my groin. Her horn’s magical glow lit up her face as she closed the distance between us, allowing me to see her smile in its wonderful, verdant light.

“Not going to lie,” I managed to say between breaths. “I’m kind of jealous of that magic. Opposable thumbs are nice, but…”

Full Bloom’s own smile became more sympathetic. “For what it’s worth, Darren, those fingers of yours leave very little to be desired.”

Ever the considerate mare, that Full Bloom. Who knew she had such a way with her words?

Full Bloom seemed to sense my growing ache, and lowered her muzzle to my level and whispered gently. “R-ready?”

I replied by wrapping both my arms around her waist and nodding. “Whenever you are.”

Full Bloom adjusted herself and slowly, carefully, lowered herself onto me.

“Nnnm…” I moaned into her neck as she immediately tightened around my length with every inch of me that she took in.

She was doing about as well as I was, letting out little whimpers and wrapping her forelegs around my shoulders. “I-I think I’m going to need some help, here, heheh…”

Happy to oblige that request, I slowly began to thrust. She gasped as our hips connected, and before I knew it she had obtained a hold of my lips with her own. It seemed like she didn’t have much of an idea what she wanted to do, though, for moments later she was nipping at my collar and licking my neckline.

If it weren’t for the fact that I was so enraptured right now by the whole ordeal, I would have found her to be absolutely precious.

“Y-you…” She said softly between breaths. “You know, rutting belly to belly is a little kinky for us ponies…”

I snickered. “If you think this is kinky, then you need to learn about some of the other positions humans created.”

“Maybe you could teach me…?”

I grinned. “Maybe.”

I rolled us over so that we were both facing each other while on our sides. I lifted one of her back legs up, and she moaned loudly as I found myself thrusting a bit deeper into her. We began to pick up the pace, the rhythm of our grinding becoming disjointed and fervent.

“D-Darren…” She panted into my ear. “I-I’m going… I…”

I nipped her ear, not too hard, but in her current state I would be surprised if she didn’t feel that. Her breathing hitched, and she went rigid, her inner walls clamping down on me tightly as I felt her second orgasm. I let go of her leg and forced myself to slow down and allow her ride out her climax while she mumbled my name and held me desperately in her forelegs.

Truth be told, I was riding on the razor’s edge myself as well, and her muscles contracting over my length was only encouraging me to release as well.

“H-hey…” She mumbled, looking at me as though in a haze. “You’re still hard, and I know you didn’t cum yet…”

She rolled onto my stomach yet again and assaulted me with a peppering of kisses and licks. She began grinding her hip over my length once more, grunting and moaning with every movement. Her long, curled locks of mane were now draped over me, blocking out the soft lamplight from the far corner of her room. I could barely make out her eyes as they gazed into mine, and the faint, tangy smell of cider still hung on her breath. When our lips locked, this time I felt her tongue pressing against my lips, begging for entrance that I eagerly granted her.

It was quickly becoming too much. It had been a long while since I’d been intimate with another woman, nevermind a sapient Equestrian mare. Between her tongue wrestling with mine, her hooves and how they were greedily running over my chest and arms, and her bouncing hips that pumped my length for all that it was worth, I found my will to hold out failing.

“F-Full Bloom, I’m…” I made to lift her off, only for her to press down.

“No,” she said, not forcefully, but with a clear insistence in her tone. “Darren, finish inside.”

“I-inside?” I blinked. “S-seriously?”

She giggled, a sultry yet endearing sound. “Yes. You think that I would be letting you rut me without wearing protection if there was a risk for conceiving?”

Ah, that was true.

She dragged her tongue along my neck and traced it down my pulse, her steamy breaths sending a wave of euphoria through my being.

"O-okay," I managed to groan out, my control slipping further and further by the moment. At this rate...

“Please,” she whispered between nips. “Do it!”

My toes curled as she pressed down on me hard, her inner walls clenching as she took all of me in. I let out a moan that I couldn’t hold back, and found myself call out her name while wrapping my arms around her tightly.

I felt incredibly drained after I climaxed, though it was far from unpleasant. I closed my eyes and held Full Bloom close, who was now gently tracing circles over my bare torso while planting soft kisses on my neckline.

“Thank you…” she whispered. “Thank you…”

I smiled and nuzzled her mane, taking in a deep breath of her floral scent. “That’s my line,” I murmured into her fur.

She chuckled softly, and I heard the hum of her magic briefly before her lamp was turned off with a soft click, then felt the sheets of her messed up bed cover us.

I opened a single eye and could make out the faint features of her face in the moonlight that washed over the bedroom. In my post-coital state, a thought ran through my mind.

“You think anyone saw us going at it through your window?” I asked. Sure, she was on the second floor of her apartment, but Equestria had plenty of winged races…

She snorted softly and hummed. “If they did, I’m sure they enjoyed the show.”

Pulling her closer to my chest, I whispered softly. “I really don’t know if I want to fall asleep and wake up to find out this is just a really lucid dream.”

She planted a chaste kiss on my lips. “Don’t worry, Darren. It’s real… or someone is casting one of the best illusion spells on me that I’ve ever experienced.”

I let out a yawn, and rested my forehead against her neck, earning a content sigh from her.

“Get some sleep, Darren…” She ran a hoof over my hair. “I’ll see you in the morning.”

“Promise…?” I asked half-jokingly.

“Yes,” she answered, kissing my forehead for a long moment. “I’ll even make us a huge breakfast.”

“Ohoho no you don’t,” I muttered with a chuckle. “I’ll make us breakfast.”

I could feel the frown she was giving me as I closed my eyes again. “Are you doubting my ability to cook?”

“No, I just like cooking.” I ran a hand through her mussed up mane, feeling her relax under my touch. “Consider it your first breakfast made by me as your boyfriend.”

She seemed to be thinking it over for several minutes if her silence was any indication. Eventually, she let out a soft chuckle and sighed. “I like my eggs scrambled with a few slices of rye toast.”

“That all?” I laughed before yawning again. “I can do that in my sleep.”

I felt the pleasant nibbling of her teeth on my jawline, just below my ear, and she whispered. “You can start getting fancy with the recipes later on.” She finally seemed to settle down, and snuggled up against me, draping a back leg over me as her tail brushed against my leg. “We’ve got all of tomorrow to worry about showing off our culinary cuisine skills…”

Giving a nod of agreement that I’m not even sure she saw, I let out a deep sigh. I couldn’t remember the last time I’d been so… exhausted… after sex. I had heard from a few stallions at my work in the past tell me how their respective mares were quite a handful sometimes, especially when they went into heat…

Oh no… will I be ready for that with Full Bloom?

I assumed she experienced the same stuff as any other mare, and if she was like this when she wasn’t going through her cycle…

I’ll cross that bridge when I get there.

With a smile, I drifted off to probably the best sleep I had experienced in years.

End of Chapter Three

Author's Note

And there we have it, chapter three. Hope you enjoyed it, because damn this chapter took a while to hammer out as far as process went.

As before, I'd like to thank Demon Eyes Laharl, Firesight, and AJ Aficionado for all their help with this chapter, from suggestions to editing.