The Clown Prince of Equestria

A short time later, Joker stood outside the entrance to Sweet Apple Acres, ready to meet the corrupted Applejack, but not before he took a little look around at the chaotic orchard. Apples were at least five times their natural size, and were all sorts of colors that apples shouldn't be, such as midnight purple, jet black, chalk white, and bubblegum pink, and the pigs had grown wings and were flying like aerial aces.

But, even that was nothing compared to how the Apple family themselves were acting. Big Macintosh, who was usually a strong and sturdy red stallion with an orange mane and tail wearing blue jeans, a white t-shirt, a red-and-white long-sleeved shirt, and work boots, was instead the same shade of gray as his sister, and moreover was digging his way through the farm like some sort of mole, or perhaps a dog, judging by the way he was panting for breath every time his head popped up.

Not far away from Big Mac, Granny Smith, who was an elderly, usually mint green pony with a white mane and tail wearing a thick brown wool dress, long white socks, and black buckle shoes, and a bonnet, and could usually be found napping in her rocking chair. Today, however, she was gray and tap dancing with a cane in her hands.

Not far from her was Apple Bloom, who was normally a cream yellow filly with a blood red mane and tail wearing a green shirt, blue jeans, and cowboy boots, was also gray and apparently thought she was fighting in a battle of some kind, judging by the way she was using sticks as rifles and rocks as grenades.

And finally, there was Applejack herself, who was leaning up against an overturned wheelbarrow, telling, as far as Joker could tell, no one in particular about how she and she alone stood up to Discord.

Joker walked up to the lying Applejack. "Good day, miss! I was hoping to see if I could play a little music for you and your family, you know, to help put a smile on your faces in the midst of all of this craziness... do you have any record players I could borrow?" he asked.

"No! We absolutely do not have any need whatsoever to listen to any music by some clown! Also, we do not have any record players, especially not in the barn, up in the rafters. Now, then, if'n you'll excuse me, Ah've got chores to do, so take a hike!" said Applejack, before she promptly took a nap.

"Thank you, Miss Applejack," said Joker, before he made his way directly towards the barn.

...

A short time later, Twilight Sparkle, who was once again her usual colors, was making her way towards Sweet Apple Acres, determined to fight for her and Applejack's friendship. When she made it to the front gates, however, a strange sight met her there.

"Take me on down to Equestria. Never alone in Equestria. Already ruled, its gonna be wild, and the ponies make me smile. Joke's on you, Discord, 'cause I'm in Ponyville, so look who's laughing now!"The strange figure said as he sang into a microphone that he'd pulled out of nowhere while a record player played an upbeat jazzy tune. "At Comic Con... I bought a snow globe. So pretty! That was the night I became a clown, and I'm gonna clown around, so look who's laughing now! The Crusader's fighting in the war, and I'm laughing! The stallion is digging and I can't stop laughing, the Granny's gone senile and I can't stop laughing, I DON'T BELONG HERE AND I CAN'T STOP LAUGHING! WHAT ELSE CAN I DO?! Now I'm one of you!"

Twilight frowned at this strange figure's appearance. He appeared to be a humanoid in shape, and seemed to be wearing clown make up, complete with green hair and a ruby red smile that stretched far past his actual lips. This being also seemed to be wearing a dark purple leather overcoat, a white polo shirt, a green vest, black jeans with a black leather belt, black dress shoes. and black leather gloves. Being ever the curious, Twilight approached the clown as he kept singing, and noticed he didn't seem to have a tail, although he certainly had a lovely singing voice.

"With everything that's happened, one might've hurled, 'cause now I'm part of this world... the world's gone crazy and I'm laughing! HA! Poor Spike's got a tummyache and I can't stop laughing! Applejack's parents are dead and I can't stop laughing!"

"OKAY, NO!" Twilight shouted at that last phrase and aimed a magic bolt right at him and blasted him dead on.

The being went flying backwards into the nearby barn, before landing on the ground in front of the stables. As Twilight advanced on him in anger, the being smiled and asked, "What, no encore, Twilight? I totally had at least two other songs planned!"

Twilight stopped in her tracks when she heard her name. "How do you know my name?" she demanded.

"Oh, I know lots of things, Miss Sparkle... but, there's always something new to learn. For example, does your homeowner's insurance policy for that treehouse you call home cover complete and utter destruction?" the clown asked.

Twilight, who was liking this clown less and less, narrowed her eyes in suspicion. "What are you talking about?"

"Shuuush... spoilers," whispered the clown, placing a finger to his lips and giggling a little.

"Yeah well.... you shouldn't be rude to my friend's family like that! If her parents are dead then you're being highly insensitive." said Twilight with disappointment in her voice.

"Oh, so now you're focusing on lecturing me? Funny, I thought you were trying to stop Discord from turning this quaint little town into the Chaos Capital of the World. Or, is lecturing a clown more important? Speaking of which, if you're looking for your former friend, she's just around the back, lying her mouth off about how she took on Discord all by her lonesome. Now, if you'll excuse me, I believe I'm going to find another venue with ponies who actually ENJOY music."Perhaps some sweet chin music, the clown finished in his mind.

And with that, the strange clown picked himself up, brushed past Twilight, and towards the door before Twilight called out to him.

"Hold on a minute... just who the hay are you?"

"Who I am... IS NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS! TOODLES!" said the clown, laughing like a hyena as he ran off.

Twilight could only stand there as the clown ran off. Thank Faust he's only a product of Discord's chaos... I hope. I don't know if Equestria would survive if he actually existed,thought Twilight. And speaking of Equestria not surviving, I'd better get back to rounding up the girls so we can stop Discord.

...

"YO, JIGSAW PUZZLE! DOWN HERE!" The Joker yelled as he threw a pie at Discord, which smacked him right in the face as he sat on a throne, drinking a chocolate milk of glass.

"What in the-"

"You didn't really think I'd let you stay out of your stone prison, right?! Besides, I got a thing or two tah teach you!" Joker yelled again causing Discord to chuckle.

"Perhaps we haven't been introduced, human. My name is Discord and... what could you possibly teach me?"

"Oh, Discord, there's always something new to learn. How about we start with 'Getting-Your-Ass-Kicked 101!'" snarled Joker, putting up his dukes and bouncing on his heels like a boxer. Discord looked at the clown and laughed.

"You truly believe you can defeat me?! Don't make me laugh! However, I'm willing to indulge in your hopeless little fantasy," said Discord, snapping his fingers.

In between the two tricksters grew a boxing ring, which both Joker and Discord entered just as a second Discord, dressed as a ring announcer, appeared.

BVGM: A Powerful Enemy Emerges-Super Paper Mario

"Fillies and Gentlecolts, boys and girls of all ages, and the cult followers this story has already acquired with a mere two chapters... LET'S GET READY TO TAAAAAAANGOOOOO!" the announcer Discord yelled into a microphone that was hanging from the sky.

"Oh, this is going to be fun."

...

BVGM: Megaleg Battle-Super Mario Galaxy 1

"THIS IS NOT FUN!" Joker yelled as he ran away from an army of Discords in tanks, the leader of which had the real Discord on top wearing a goofy military commander's uniform and brandishing a sword.

"DRIVE ME CLOSER! I WISH TO HIT HIM WITH MY SWORD!"

"Yes, sir!" said the Discord driving the tank, who then accelerated.

"WHY DID I THINK THIS WAS A GOOD IDEA?!" yelled Joker as he raced past what he realized a split-second later was the Mane 6, all of whom were back to normal and wearing their Elements of Harmony, before he ran face first into a flying lamp post, knocking him out cold.

"Who the heck was that guy?" asked Rainbow Dash, who was a cyan blue anthro pegasus with a rainbow-patterned mane and tail wearing a dark blue short-sleeved jacket, a white t-shirt with the picture of a cloud and a rainbow-colored lightning bolt, blue jeans, and magenta-and-white sneakers with the same logo as her shirt on them.

Pinkie Pie skipped over to where the clown had been knocked out. "He's a clown!" she reported to her friends, although, in her head she added, A very handsome clown... wonder what he looks like without that makeup?

Twilight recognized the clown and felt a small surge of anger. "He's not a very nice clown, I'll say that much," she said.

"Aw, come on, Twilight! ALL clowns are nice! Their sole reason for existing is to bring cheer and laughter to the otherwise down and gloomy masses!" said Pinkie.

"You didn't hear what he sang about Applejack's parents, Pinkie," Twilight said sternly.

Applejack entered the conversation. "What's that about mah Ma an' Pa?" she asked as Fluttershy attempted to speak up.

"Um, girls-"

"He said that he couldn't stop laughing because they were dead," said Twilight.

Rarity, Rainbow, and Pinkie did a sharp intake of breath. Twilight was right, that definitely was not funny at all. Applejack, meanwhile, wasn't concerned with the humor of this clown's words, but rather, the words themselves... it just didn't make sense... how could this clown, who she'd never met until today, possibly know her deepest, darkest, secret? A secret she'd buried deep inside her memories, only to resurface in her nightmares and darkest moments? A secret she hadn't even told her five closest friends in the world?

A secret she hadn't even told her own baby sister?

Applejack could practically feel the raindrops on her fur again as the scene began to play again in her mind-

"GIRLS!"

Fluttershy's yell caused Applejack's mind to snap back to the present. "Huh? Whuh? What's going on?" asked Applejack as she looked wildly around and Twilight, Pinkie, Rainbow, and Rarity looked at Fluttershy.

"Fluttershy, what's wrong?" asked Twilight.

"Perhaps I'M what's wrong, ladies," said an all-too-familiar voice.

They all turned to see Discord smiling wickedly at them, his eyes wandering down towards their Elements. "Well, now I see you've decided to try again with the whole 'Blast-Him-With-The-Elements' thing... very well, I suppose I could humor you with one more try. But, you'd better make it quick. Because of that irritating clown, I've missed all sorts of wonderful chaos," he grumbled.

"Okay, just remember, you asked for it! Ladies! Formation!" said Twilight.

On the purple unicorn's command, Rarity, Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy, Pinkie, and Applejack assumed the same formation they'd used earlier against Discord. Just as before, the six Elements of Harmony glowed with a bright light as the Mane 6 were lifted into the air, their eyes closed.

Discord didn't really seem all that concerned about this. At least, not until the Elements began to emit waves of magical energy, followed swiftly by small energy discharges. "What's this?" he said, raising an eyebrow.

A rainbow began to flow out of Twilight Sparkle's tiara jewel, which began to connect to all the other Elements. At the sight of the rainbow, fear crept its way into Discord's eyes. "No... no, no, no, no, no," he said.

Twilight's eyes flew open, revealing nothing but a pure white glow of energy, and in that same moment, a huge rainbow-colored blast nailed Discord, who slowly began to turn to stone as he screamed.

Within moments, the petrified Discord fell over with a thud. In that same instant, a bright flash of light eminated from Ponyville, and perhaps all over Equestria, as the twisted and chaotic landscape returned to its original state with lush green hills, cobalt blue lakes, and so on.

"Well, that's the end of Discord," said Twilight as she and her exhausted friends floated gently to the ground.

"Great! Now we can take care of the clown guy!" said Pinkie.

"Pinkie, that clown wasn't rea- uh-oh," said Twilight, turning around to find that the mysterious clown was still lying on the ground, unconcious and bleeding from the gash that running into the lamp post while Pinkie Pie attempted to pick him up.

"Are you girls just going to stand there, or are you going to help me get him back to my place?" asked Pinkie.

As Rarity, Rainbow, Applejack, and Fluttershy moved to help Pinkie, Twilight gave a sigh.

She had a funny feeling that Equestria was in for a long and bumpy ride.