Eternal Chaos of the Spotless Draconequus

For reasons I cannot even begin to fathom, I decided not to swim through the chaos dimensions today.

Instead, I took a train up to Ponyville. I cannot for the life of me think of why I did this. I don't even like going to Ponyville. It's full of ponies for one thing. Irritating, symmetrical little things that spout platitudes about friendship and love and other bile-inducing banalities. Heck, I don't even usually take trains places. What's the point when teleportation is so much quicker? Not to mention free. But I guess I just needed to be alone to think for a while, and on this train, I definitely seemed to be alone.

Ponies sat far away from me on the journey. I was used to this. Many of Equestria's citizens still don't think I'm fully reformed.

You see, I'm on probation. It's been that way since I was released from my concrete prison. Funnily enough I don't remember the particulars of my release-- probably a side effect of suffering sensory-deprivation for too long. I just know that if I decide to wreck havoc again my tush will be back in stone faster than a flatulent sea serpent with a propellor attached to its butt.

But I want to cause chaos. Oh, man, I really do. Which is why I mostly stay in my own dimension, except when Celestia calls me to do some kind of task to "prove" that I still don't want to be a static model for the rest of eternity. As if anyone needs to prove they don't want that. Sometimes I feel like no one understands me. Oh geeze, that sounds like a sob story, but honestly it's extremely stifling to have to suppress everything that makes one unique. You'd think ponies would understand that what with how much they go on about cutie marks and special talents etc.

As if to further illustrate my point, the carriage was mostly empty. No one wants to even sit within 20 feet me. Sometimes I hear whispering when I'm out in public, and ponies will look over their shoulders at me.

No...wait. I'm mistaken. There is someone else in this carriage. I hadn't noticed her before, probably because she was so quiet.

It was a small canary yellow pegasus with a long pink mane and tail. She was rather petite for a pegasus; they are usually rather athletically built due to all the weather-working genes and all the time they spend flying. I poked my head out into the aisle so I could better observe her. She seemed oblivious to me.

Something about the situation was bugging me, like an itch I couldn't quite reach to scratch. I peered over the train seat at the small mare. She had taken a book about the Gallopagos Islands out of her bag and was flipping through it, studying the pictures and text. Her small head tilted as she absorbed the words.

Maybe she was one of those annoying ponies I saw at that annoying gala I had to help set up. I swear to Bog that Celestia must be assigning me the most boring tasks purely so she can torture me for her own amusement.

I strided over to the pegasus and peered over the train seat in front of her so I could look her straight in the eye.

She looked up with a start. "Um...hello?" she said softly, her huge teal eyes peering nervously over the edge of her book.

"Do I know you?" I asked, as if she had been the one to approach me.

"Um...I don't think so."

I flicked an ear and narrowed my eyes as I regarded her. Why was this bugging me so much? Why in chaos did I care? Maybe I could satisfy my curiousity if she told me where she was going.

"Ponyville," she said.

"Oh, I'm going back that way too. But I don't live in Ponyville."

"Oh? Where are you from?"

I tilted my head at her again like a confused dog and laughed.

"You mean you don't know who I am?"

Now it was her turn to look confused. "I'm sorry, Mister...um..."

"Discord. My name is Discord, Spirit of Chaos and Disharmony? Master of the Lower Realms of Pandemonium, Lord of Disorder, ruled Equestria for over a thousand years until Princess Luna and Princess Celestia decided they wanted to clean house and make sure the pigeons had a new toilet? Oldest (and in my opinion handsomest) Being in Equestria?" I grinned at her and tossed my horns as a final flourish, my fang gleaming in the daylight.

She blinked once then shook her head at me.

Well, this was certainly new. I was certain everyone knew who I was and about my probation. That was why the vast majority of the ponies were in other train carriages- they were giving me a wide berth. For all the rhetoric ponies spout about friendship and forgiveness, the overwhelming glut of them are incredible hypocrites. Why, it's not like I tormented them for goodness sakes! I only made their ancestor's lives miserable.

"Are you okay?" she asked me.

I realized I had been staring at her.

I laughed and said "never better. Why do you ask?"

"For a second there you looked kind of sad."

"Ha! Little pony, whatever your name is, I don't do sad. I'm all about the laughs." A flock of kookaburras burst out of my ears as I said this and cackled as they flew around the carriage and promptly vanished in a shower of stars.

"It's Fluttershy."

"What?"

"My name is Fluttershy."

"Oh, well. Whatever," I said. I suddenly felt uncomfortable. If I didn't know her and she didn't know me then why was I talking to her?

"That thing you did with the kookaburras was wonderful. I love kookaburras. Did you know they are the largest kingfishers in the world? They have really good eyesight, and can catch a fish with amazing precision when they dive for it."

Why was she telling me this? Why hadn't I gone back to my seat yet?

"I know what a kookaburra is," I said, a little snappily. "I know pretty much everything there is to know about nature. I am chaos, after all. Where do you think nature comes from? The stork?"

"Storks are lovely birds too," she said, beaming at me. "I saw one once when I went on a field trip."

Why was she still talking?

"Oh! And once I saw one on Lake Ponyville. It was huge and I watched it catch five fish before it flew off."

"Well Lake Ponyville is comepletely frozen this time of year," I retorted.

"I know, but I still love going there. There's still things to see and do. Once I saw some deer stripping bark off a tree, and sometimes my friends and I go ice-skating."

At the mention of the word "friends" I remembered the situation and started to make my way back to my seat.

"Have you ever been ice-skating?" she asked, just as my lizard foot was about to make contact with the floor of the train carriage. It stilled in mid air.

"No..." I admitted. It was one of the few things I hadn't done. "But I can do so anytime I want. I just don't feel like it."

"Oh, that's a shame, Discord. I was going to ask if you wanted to come ice skating some time?"

"What? You don't even know me."

She suddenly looked embarrassed then her ears drooped and she stared out the window.

Oh heck.

"I'm...you're right. I'm sorry. I guess I just feel a bit out of sorts today. It's Hearts and Hooves day and all my friends have special someponies and they're busy with their loved ones. I mean, I know they're still good friends and haven't abandoned me or anything like that, but I understand that they would want to be alone with their coltfriends today."

I raised an eyebrow. Guess I wasn't the only one being avoided today.

"Listen...Shutterfly..."

"It's Fluttershy..."

"Right, whatever. Listen, Fluttershy truth be told I've got nothing to do today, and if I go to Canterlot I'm sure I'll just be given some boring rubbish to do, and that sounds like no fun. So, not that I find ice-skating that interesting or anything but given the choice between that and monitoring magical fields for blips this afternoon, I guess ice-skating wins out".

She beamed at me.

To be honest, I find ice-skating kind of dull. I mean, I can float, fly and whizz across dimensions. Gliding across ice doesn't take too much effort. I got bored of moving around on bladed shoes, and after a while I started sliding across the ice on my belly instead. At first I only moved a few feet at a time, but after a while I was whizzing across the ice at a great speed around and around the pegasus.

"Ha! Fluttershy, you should try it without the skates!"

"Oh, um. No, that's okay," she said softly.

I continued to slide around and around her, shouting each word as I passed closest to her..."You...really...should..."

Then, before I could even think about what I was doing I reached out and grabbed her and pulled her back onto the ice with me as I continued to speed across it.

She shrieked out loud and called at me to stop but inbetween her yelling she was giggling. Little by little I slowed down my centrifugal movements across the ice.

It was beginning to get dark and the first stars were beginning to appear in the sky above us. There was less light pollution near the lake and more of the sky was visible.As we finally skidded to a halt on the ice we lay on the surface trying to catch our breaths.

More of the stars were out now.

I pointed to a random constellation with my talon.

"That one looks like a dragon's butt," I said grinning.

"Stop!" she laughed. "It does not!"

"It kinda does," I said. "Like when a lady dragon is about to lay an egg."

She giggled. I shifted my head so I could have a better look at her. Her mane looked very soft and framed her delicate face perfectly.

What was this? Why was I allowing myself to trust this pony? And she was a pony, one of the types of creatures that seemed to hate and fear me and cross over to the over side of the road if they saw me coming.

"You're funny, Discord," she whispered, then her head was resting on my chest and I could feel her soft mane draped over the upper part of my feathery body. Despite the freezing surface of the ice I suddenly felt strangely warm. Her breathing was steadier now and I wondered if she had fallen asleep. I conjured up a blanket and gathered her up, then I started to make my way back to Ponyville.

***

"Fluttershy...hey, Fluttershy wake up. We're back in ponyville."

She stirred under the blanket and curled up against the feathers on my chest, then she opened her eyes. We were outside her cottage.

"Oh!"

"Yup," I chuckled. "You're home."

She went very still as if she was considering something.

"Discord...can I? Can I sleep at your place? Just sleep, I mean.  I'm so tired. Then maybe we could have tea?"

I was stunned. She was that comfortable with me already? Today really did feel surreal, and that's something when the Spirit of Chaos is thinking that.

I nodded, dumbfounded.

"Let me just pack a bag with my things," she said, shooting me that winning smile again. I placed her gently on the ground and watched her walk up to the cottage.

She's so pretty. And she isn't *afraid** of me. Not one bit.*

"Hey," said a voice behind me. "What are you doing here?"

I turned to see a blue unicorn with white hair regarding me.

Today was just full of confusion. Normally I like that sort of thing but not when it makes me feel like a fool.

"What are you talking about?" I asked. "I've never seen you before in my life."

She looked as if something had dawned on her. "Oh, right. Of course," she said. "My mistake."

And she walked away as I wondered how I could be mistaken for anyone. Yeesh, Ponyville is full of nutters sometimes, I swear. Or maybe they just want to have a look at the Lord of Chaos and tell their friends they've gazed upon me. Sort of like a bet or something. A Hearts and Hooves day bet where they can impress their mates. "Oh, I walked right up to the Spirit of Chaos and he didn't even attempt to mind control me! Aren't I a brave, brave pony? Adore me". Bleaaargh. Vomit.  Either way,I quickly forgot about the unicorn as I waited for my new friend.

Friend. The word made me feel warm inside. I'd never had a friend before.