Through Another's Eyes

Snips and Snails, the Ponyville retarded- I mean, mentally challenged duo, were sitting in front of the school, their eyes staring blankly into the horizon. Their thoughts, as simple as it is, were stuck on the subject of The Great and Powerful Trixie who had just appeared in town and claimed to be the greatest unicorn in all of Equestria. Despite the blatant lie, their simple minded brain only registered the fact that she had good magic.

Talk about too dumb to live.

“If only Trixie would agree to be our girlfriend, that would be amazing!” said Snails dreamily, as would any other hopeless romantic lover

“Yeah!” agreed Snips “then people would actually like us for being with her!”

The conversation continued on, sticking to the only topic in their simple minds. After some time, other foals were getting worried of the two colts’ conversation and started to back off, going to a different section of the school’s playground. It had only been about five minutes since the blue unicorn’s spectacular show, and most others already hated the mare.

“I know!” Snails suddenly said as he jumped up in joy of his new plan “Why don’t you try to get somepony to be your super special somepony, then we could try the same on The Great and Powerful Trixie!”

“That’s a great idea!” Snips agreed before coming to a realisation “Wait, why me?”

“Because you’re cooler! You’re like, the coolest pony ever!”

“Yeah, you’re right!”

The two hoof-bumped and trotted off to find a filly they could try and hit on. Pipsqueak and Dinky, who were watching the two from a distance, could only shrug at their strange logic. The two just decided to continue watching them and see how much damage they would soon cause.

The two colts’ luck was in store as they soon found three fillies playing with a scooter; Sweetie Belle, Scootaloo and Twist. The former two were best friends while the latter was just… there. Obviously, the two unicorns jumped on the chance.

“Hey, girls~” Snips tried to say seductively but only ended up sounding even lamer “Any of you need a big strong stallion?”

“Not really, nope” Scootaloo said, feeling uneasy

“Well, why don’t you try on Apple Bloom over there? She looks lonely” Sweetie Belle added in, pointing to the filly playing by herself a few feet away

“That’s a great idea!” Snips and Snails said in unison as they finally found their chance at trying to hit on Trixie later. Snails then added in “Do you have any tips?”

“Jutht be thtraightforward!” Twist said with her ever popular lisp “She’ll understand!”

With a nod, Snips ran towards the yellow filly who was playing near a tree. Snails stayed back with the girls to allow the two to have some “alone time” together. After a few moments, Apple Bloom saw the cot trotting over and waved a hoof towards him.

“Well howdy there, Snips!” she said happily “What’re ya’ll doing out here on yer lonesome?”

“I have red hair. You have red hair. Let’s get married and make babies” Snips said matter-of-factly, grinning strangely at the filly.
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“I just don’t know what went wrong” said Snips as he put an ice pack on his left eye

The other foals only smiled awkwardly at the blue unicorn colt. The simple yet awkward sentence that Snips had said had caused Apple Bloom to buck him right in the face, causing him to get a black eye. Well, maybe that’s why you shouldn’t mess with a member of the Apple family.

“Here’s an idea, be funny!” Scootaloo chimed in “Tell her a joke you heard somepony say somewhere and she’ll be head over heels for you in no time!”

“That’s great!” Snails piped up “Hey, I heard a good one this stallion said once! Listen…”

The taller unicorn started to whisper something into Snips’ ear which made Snips giggle. Obviously, the joke was a good one, and he couldn’t wait to try it. Before long, Snips had already run off to find Apple Bloom once more. Right now, the filly had moved over to the swing set where she played by herself.

When she saw Snips coming over, Apple Bloom immediately tried to run away. Despite her best efforts, Snips still managed to catch up with her even with his large weight and short legs. Don’t ask how, he just did, okay.

“What is it this time?” Apple Bloom asked with an annoyed expression

“Have you ever wondered how I got my Cutie Mark?” Snips said with his weird grin which was only made worse with his black left eye

“Not really” Apple Bloom said in wonder “How did ya get it?”

“By cutting G-Strings!”
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“Bad choice of words, dude” Scootaloo said to Snips

The unicorn foal had another ice pack on his other eye. Apparently, Apple Bloom had managed to buck the colt once more after the terrible innuendo pun. His face felt so pain-struck that it was a miracle Snips could even breathe right. Of course, he could be breathing through his mouth and all.

“Well, Rarity always said to accept somepony as who they really are” Sweetie Belle said with a sincere smile “Try it one last time?”

“Don’t worry, buddy. We’ve got your back” Snails continued on as he smiled as well

“I’ll get a nurse” they all heard somepony, probably another colt, say behind them. The all just ignored the spoken words and watched as Snips made a final attempt at flirting.
“Thith ithn’t going to end well” Twist muttered

Right now, Apple Bloom was hiding behind a berry bush situated in a remote location behind the school. By all means, she wanted to escape from whatever plan Snips was going to come up with. Sadly, as if some universal law said so, Snips still found her.

“Hyuck! Well, howdy ya’ll! Ah changed mah accent just fer lil’ ol’ Apple Bloom! Yeehaw!” Snips said, insulting every single cowboy stereotype that was ever made.

“That’s it” Apple Bloom finally cracked “Ya’ll are goin’ to the moon!”
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Snails placed another ice pack on his best friend’s body as he tried to ease the pain. The colt’s entire body was filled with bruises and his back left hoof was turning in a way it wasn’t supposed to turn. The three fillies had left, trying to look for a nurse to help them out. It didn’t take long before Nurse Redheart walked up to the colt, followed closely behind by Pipsqueak and Dinky.

“Lemme guess, Apple family?” Nurse Redheart said with a solid expression. These two were another pair of ponies she was used to, thanks to their idiocy at most times

“Apple Bloom…” Snips muttered painfully

“If you really wanted to get Trixie to fall for you, try getting her something” Dinky said innocently, giggling at the idea

“Yeah, that’s a great idea” Pipsqueak, who had just moved to Ponyville a few days ago, said “Or just talk to her, at least”

“I heard she wanted a smoothie” Snips said as Nurse Redheart put him on a stretcher to go back to the hospital

“Smoothie!” Snails piped up happily as he followed the two ponies from behind

Pipsqueak and Dinky just giggled at the two ponies’ actions. Their frienship was truly a friendship that would last a lifetime.