Through Another's Eyes

Today was another lazy and boring day for the ponies of Ponyville. No evil mastermind, no terrible mythological monster, not even a crafty con artist could be seen. This is one of those days that Lyra Heartstrings was practically bored of.

For some obscure reason that nopony could explain, Lyra was sitting at a picnic table, waiting for Bon Bon to come back. In front of her lay a drink, one that she had bought earlier. Simple enough, nothing could possibly go wrong. Seriously, nothing could.

As usual, Lyra’s mind started working its strange ways. As you may have known, Lyra has this strange quirk of trying to act like a monkey at most times; walking on two legs, sitting in a very painful posture, you get the idea. It only got worse when Pinkie Pie told her about the existence of “humans”.

Lyra started to reach out to her drink, flailing her lazy arms stupidly as she tried to grab her drink. She silently cursed, saying that it would be better if she had fingers. Why she wouldn’t just use her magic, well, don’t ask.

“Hey, Lyra!” said a voice the green unicorn knew so well; her best friend Bon Bon “Sorry to keep you waiting, I had some things I had to do first

“No problem” replied Lyra with her rather smug voice “I’m just glad you’re here”

“Yeah, now to wait for Derpy” Bon Bon added as she looked around for the pegasus pony “She should be here by now”

“Meh, you know her. Probably blew up another house and got lost… thrice”

Lyra’s thoughts then drifted off, not particularly registering anything that Bon Bon was saying anymore. At times she would just reply with a simple ‘Yup’ or a ‘Nope’ and sometimes a ‘You don’t say?’. She soon spotted the ever-popular Ditzy Doo, buying some asparagus. Good, she was actually on time. The next thing she saw blew her mind.

“Boy, am I glad you have one cherry left. You see I'm making this special meal for my bunny Angel, he's a very picky eater, and the recipe calls for a cherry on top” said Fluttershy, using her wing to open her saddle bag and take out a coin

“That’s IT!” cried Lyra; amazed at what she had just seen “I wanna be a pegasus!”

Bon Bon only looked at her best friend with a confused expression. Usually, she would exclaim that she wanted to be a human. A few months ago, she managed to turn into a seapony by accident (Bon Bon still had nightmares about that). Now a pegasus? Honestly, Bon Bon wished Lyra would just make up her mind.

“And… why would you want to be one?” Bon Bon asked, hoping it would be a logical explanation. Obviously, it isn’t.

“So I could grab stuff with my wings!” Lyra said with her creepy grin that many were still scared with “That’ll be AWESOME!”

“Wait, so you want wings, not to fly, but to grab things?” Bon Bon asked, unable to comprehend the logic in that statement “How is that practical?”

Lyra was about to answer with her twisted sense of logic when suddenly, a perky voice spoke out. Despite waiting for hours (Lyra had come much too early for her own good), Lyra was glad to see the local mailmare. It was strange, since Ditzy Doo was never close to Lyra and Bon Bon, but it doesn’t really matter that much. In fact, Lyra was the one that called her over to talk about some “things”.

“Hi guys!” Ditzy Doo said in her cheerful and sweet voice “What’cha doin’? Sorry I’m late. Needed to buy some stuff for Carrot Top, but they’re all out of stock. Makes you wonder how they run out of asparagus, tomatoes, cherries, oranges and whipped cream all on the same day”

“Yeah, pretty strange…” Bon Bon said, remembering the last time Ditzy had bought groceries
__________________________________________________________________________________
Ditzy stood in front of a burning marketplace with her groceries on the ground, all covered in chocolate and hot sauce. Screams of scared ponies could be heard as they tried to salvage whatever was left of the market.

“I just don’t know what went wrong…”
__________________________________________________________________________________

Ditzy was henceforth banned from buying any more groceries, and others would have to do it for her. Obviously, she never got the memo.

“So, about that little scene you saw nine episodes ago…” Lyra started to say, using her most business-like tone “You are aware that it was all a misunderstanding?”

“Of course!” Ditzy said “I mean, none of the bronies even saw you and Bon Bon do anything that involves shipping and even if you did they would have made, like, 50 fan fics about you guys getting hitched or something vulgar anyway”

Bon Bon sighed as the two continued speaking in their strange lingo. Sure, the two had almost kissed a few weeks ago which was stopped abruptly by Ditzy suddenly coming out of the well and scaring them half to death, but why use the term episodes? It wasn’t like some great entity was recording the lives of six mares for the enjoyment of others in a parallel universe.

That was, of course, what Lyra and several others thought. Pinkie Pie had somehow started a club. The Fourth Wall Awareness Club to be exact. She’s been trying to recruit as many ponies, trying to tell them about a world that exists beyond their own, where creatures watch them for their own amusement. So far, she’s only gotten Lyra, Ditzy, Spike and that strange Minotaur who was setting up a stage for an assertiveness campaign named Iron Will to join. Berry Punch has considered this as well, but would rather abuse her “newfound knowledge” on being a cartoon character and the Fourth Wall to become invincible, incredibly strong and watch a show called Doctor Who. The Doctor and Colgate… well, they try to avoid the subject at best. Nopony else really paid the club much attention, though.

The two continued on with their jolly banter as Bon Bon listened half-heartedly. It was really hard to focus on their conversation when she barely understood half of it. Still, she tried to be a good supportive friend. She was just about to call it quits and ask to go home when the sight of two ponies caught her attention: The Doctor and Colgate.

The two were sweating bullets, panting as if they had just run a marathon. Luckily for the two ponies, none of the ponies nearby had perverted thoughts and they trotted up with no strange remarks on Colgate being “rough in bed” or anything similar.

Okay, now that was just sick.

“Hello, Ditzy!” said The Doctor, sighing as the two ponies slumped onto the table “Fine weather we’re having and whatnot?”

“Hi, Doctor! Colgate!” Ditzy said rather cheerfully “Anything troubling you guys?”

“Just had to destroy the last of the latest edition of the Foal Free Press” Colgate muttered, wiping her head “That’s the last time anypony spreads rumours about me and The Doctor having an affair”

“Or tells all of Equestria about the TARDIS’ abilities” The Doctor added “Good thing Sparkler was nice enough to help”

Lyra and Bon Bon, confused at the statements, simply stared at the two in bewilderment. They were fully aware that the Foal Free Press was the school’s paper, but it was never anything too exciting. It usually had some boring news that was quickly spread by word of mouth earlier on, but columns on affairs and the big blue box The Doctor keeps trying to hide? Now that was new.

“Well, look on the bright side!” The Doctor muttered, still a little out of breath “At least nopony found out your full name’s Colgate Minuette!”

Colgate then responded with punching The Doctor on the face, muttering about loose lips and eavesdropping ponies. By now, the two ponies were getting worried and Ditzy was… well, being herself. Were these two ill or something?

“Umm, guys?” Lyra asked “You do know the Foal Free Press is, like, a kid’s paper, right?”

“Are you guys okay?” Bon Bon said worriedly

This made the two ponies’ eyes bulge in shock. Surely, there couldn’t have been a miscalculation. The Doctor had made sure the two ponies would return to exactly the time and day they had left. The TARDIS must’ve been acting up again.

“Derpy…” said Colgate, starting to get worried “what’s the date today?”

“Umm… 3rd of March 2012, I think?” Ditzy answered “Why? Landed too early?”

“Blasted!” The Doctor screamed, pulling Colgate up and putting her dangerously close to his face “We’ve got to go, Romana! We might have already caused a rip in the fabric of time and space itself! Allons-y!”

With the yell of his catchphrase, The Doctor ran off towards where he came from , Colgate in tow. The blue mare was screaming at The Doctor, reminding him that her name was Colgate. There was a collective sigh from the three companions who were still confused as to what was happening.

“I’m still wondering if that Colgate actually has a relationship with The Doctor, but ponies like to say you do, Derpy” Lyra said, rubbing her chin “Could he be cheating on you?”

“That’s just silly, me and The Doctor are just friends!” Derpy replied

“Friendzoned…” muttered Lyra

“Anyway, just forget whatever they just said. It’s probably just them playing or something”

Bon Bon only nodded as the two new friends then continued to speak about their Fourth Wall Awareness Club. She couldn’t help but shake the feeling that what the two ponies were talking about was extremely important. After a few moments of thinking, she just sighed and joined in on her friends’ conversation. Maybe it was time she tried to understand this Fourth Wall thing.

Let’s just say she still doesn’t believe in it, anyway.