A Herd of Misfits

“Okay, just breath.” I had been repeating the mantra over and over again as I stood with a hoof raised to knock on the cottage door of Fluttershy's house. This was a big step for me. I was going to ask the most cute and adorable pony I knew to be my special some pony. When I had moved into Ponyville a year ago, from Los Pegasus, invited by Princess Twilight Sparkle to bring more culture to the ponies here as an urban dance instructor, I was alone. That was until I met Fluttershy.

It was a chance meeting. I was out and about, running some errands and getting fliers up for the grand opening of the little studio I could rent with what meager bits I had, when I found a small fledgling had fallen from its little nest. Poor chirper didn't know how to fly, and was endangered of getting trampled by the traffic of the street. Without hesitation, I galloped across the street, earning some nasty looks as I cut off other ponies, and scooped him up, nearly knocking over another pony.

“Watch it!” I snapped. Holding the little feather puff ball like he was a glass orb. “You almost stomped on the little guy!”

The stallion didn't looked to concerned that his hoof might have been the last thing the little birdie would have seen. He just simple muttered a 'sorry' and kept going on. I shrugged his callousness off, and turned to the tree where the little bird had fallen from.

“Oh my,” The sweetest voice I've ever heard drifted from over my right shoulder. “Did he fall from all the way up there?”

I turned to see the most gorgeous Pegasus I'd ever seen in my whole life, her coat of yellow and  mane of pink, eyes wide with concern for the little flightless bird I was protecting. I was struck dumb, and only could nod.

“I can help.” She offered, with a smile that made my heart flutter like it had grown little wings of it's own. I hoof'd over the baby bird and she flew him up to his home and waiting mother. I didn't understand bird, but it seemed this mare could, and from the sounds of it, the mother was all too grateful for having her baby back.

When she floated back down, my angel alighted on the ground with such ease, I was waiting for the voice of Celestia to speak to the world saying 'This is my gift unto you, my little ponies. May her grace give you strength and peace.'

“Oh,” She blushed. “I'm Fluttershy. Thank you for saving Mrs. Jay's baby. She was very happy to have him back.”

“N-no problem.” I stammered, the words sticking in my throat. “Th-the name's Red. Red Jasper.”

Noise from the other side of the door yanked me back to the present, as I heard voices.

“Diskie?!” Fluttershy was saying, giggling. “I tolahahahaha- Stop ihihit!”

There was some chaotic laughter mixing in with hers. My hoof wavered.

“But, my dear,” A mischievous voice was saying. “How can I stop? You make the cutest squeaks.”

My face burned. I didn't know Fluttershy squeaked.

“Discord, you are so silly. I do not- Squeak~!” The sound of her cute noise made me blush harder.

“All fun and games aside.” Discord, I guess his name was, dropped his playful tone for one of nervousness. “This isn't just a social call you know?”

“Oh?” I found myself repeating the question. “What is it? You can tell me.”

“Well,” There was a pause. “You see, it's not as much tell as,” Something popped inside the little cottage. “Ask.”

“OH Discord! Yes! Yes, Yes, Yes! I will marry you!”

My body went numb. I'm sure she said more, but the words fell upon deaf ears. I don't know at what point I started moving, but I'm sure Fluttershy would be curious why there was a bouquet of crumpled yellow and pink roses on her door step. Then again, maybe she would be too busy squeaking for her faience.

My mind didn't register anything but pain and crushing sorrow. There were so many times I could have asked the mare out, but I was just too damn shy myself. It's strange, back home, I didn't care too much about getting any special attention from the ladies, but Fluttershy was so different. Kind, not worried about her looks, or my pay check. She was sweet, funny, loves animals...

Knock, knock, knock.

“Coming!” RJ's voice replied from somewhere on the other side of the door. His voice made me snap back to reality, feeling wetness on my face, like I had just walked threw a thunderstorm. I couldn't remember walking cross town to where he and his roommates lived, on the outskirts of Ponyville heading towards Canterlot.

The door swung open, bathing me in light that seem to radiate from within the home, looking so warm and inviting, yet out of reach for one such as I.

“Red?!” Realm Jumper, RJ for short, was a yellow unicorn with a stunning neon blue mane, with a spiral of the same blue running up his horn. “Celestia! What happened to you?!”

I sniffed. “Can, I...come in?”

He moved to one side, letting me in. I walked over to his couch and laid down. Realm and I had been friends for most of this past year. Turns out he was a fan of my dancing. He told me once that he saw me on his last trip to Los Pegasus. I used to street preform, and with how much hoof traffic was out there, I could easily earn a few hundred bits a week. The unfortunate thing was it about cost that much to live out there, making the move to Ponyville more appealing, and affordable, than staying out there.

Penn, Realm Jumper's roommate, and friend was with him at the time. The green earth pony scholar was the one who told Princess Twilight about me, and pitched the idea, saying that if Ponyville were to be properly enriched, the town needed more of the arts as well.

Here, I was among friends. Yet, I felt completely abandoned. I cried. I didn't know what I said, or if I said anything, as I wept into the cushions of his couch. I felt like I was in a void of darkness, not even noticing when some pony sat down next too me, gently lifting me up and pulled me in, so I could cry into his chest.

“She's engaged!” I balled, feeling the foreleg around my shoulders tighten. “I was going to as-ask her t-t-to...to..”

I couldn't finish it. The thought of why I was on that doorstep only drove the stake in my heart deeper. A fresh wave of tears washed over me, drowning me with grief in a sea of sorrow. I'd never learn to love again. My heart just couldn't take it. It wasn't shattered as much as ripped apart piece by bloody little piece.

“Shhhhhh.” Realm's voice cooed, rocking me back and forth, trying to quite my tears. “Hey, I'm here. I'm here.”

“I-i-I l-l-” The little pieces of my heart were now being stepped one by one, until they had cracked into little sharp edge fragments that cut deep just by laying there.

RJ's gentle hoof lifted my chin, coxing me to look up into his understanding eyes. “Hey, buddy. I've been there before.” He smiled kindly, somehow bringing a flutter of feeling into my stilled chest. “It hurts, but the pain won't last forever.”

My sobbing quieted to leaking tears that flowed like an old faucet. His blue eyes searched in mine, seeming to find something in the fathoms of my soul that I could not. Slowly, he leaned in. Slowly, I closed my eyes, letting his lips take mine in a kiss. It was a simple kiss. A kiss of love unspoken. My first kiss.

Somehow...Somehow my pain, that cut like a razor, seemed to lessen, causing my heart shards to flutter again. He held me in his strong forelegs, and I just laid there, finding myself becoming content to do so, as more silent tears flowed out of my closed eyes.

I only opened them when he broke our connection. “Why?” I asked weakly, sniffing a little. “Why? I'm so-”

“Say worthless, I'll bite you.” RJ growled. The sudden aggression startled me. “You are anything but worthless. This was a first love, and so it didn't go so well, but that's hardly grounds to call yourself worthless.”

Mutely, I nodded, snuggling back into his chest. My heart still ached, but being held by this stallion made it...ache less. Made me feel...wanted. I'd never looked twice at another stallion, but I didn't find the idea of being with one odd. It was just something I'd never though about, nor considered.

“I guess,” Realm considered my question seriously. “It's because you are so unique.” Looking up I could see he was frowning. “No, that's not the right way to put it...Well...” He smiled. “I'll show you.”

With that, he nudged me off his lap. Obediently, I complied, stepping off his couch, and sat on my haunches, waiting for him to lead the way. As he got off the couch, he stretched, like a cat would after napping. I could hear some pops and cracks.

“Ooohh Celestia's mane, that felt good.” He tossed his own mane a little and gave me a cheeky smile. “This way.”

The house was a bit bigger than I realized. He trotted down the hallway, knocking on some doors saying, “Meeting in five.”

Curiosity soon got the better of me after we came to a large room that was littered with ground pillows and seating cushions.

“What's going on?” I asked, ears perking up.

“You'll see in a few.” He replies, laying on a pillow, making himself comfortable.

I chose to sit, ears flicking with curiosity. If nothing else, this was better than wallowing in sorrow. A twitch in my chest reminded me that I might be putting off the inevitable, but for the moment, I forced myself to ignore it. I wasn't ready to face the pain again.

Penn, a slender green earth pony trotted in first. His rumpled short black mane bounced with each step, his tail swishing back and forth as he looked from me to Realm Jumper then back to me, clearly as curious as I was. Wordlessly, he sat on a cushion.

“Should I take minutes?” He asked, cocking his head to one side.

RJ nodded. “That might be good, as we need to iron out some business as well.”

Now I was REALLY curious.

Trixie, void of her purple star cloak and sorcerer's hat, walked in. She smiled seeing Penn and RJ, but halted mid step upon seeing me. She gave a nervous look to Realm, looking for something. When the yellow unicorn nodded, she made her way to the small circle that we started to make, sitting herself between Penn and Realm, and as far from me as she could. I watched her, as she kept her eyes on the ground, only glancing up every so often. The coyness that she looked up at me was rather cute. Almost as cute as-

Oh that thought made my chest feel hollow inside.

Next was a Pegasus. Her coat was bronze, and here eyes matched her coat. Only her black tipped brown mane and tail brought any relieve from the color. Her right ear and left leg, though, were actually made of bronze, creaking slightly as she walked, her wings folded to her sides as she trotted up and sat next to Trixie. She offered a smile, which, to my amazement, I was able to return.

Okay, what was going on?

The last pony to join us caused my jaw to drop. He was tall. Fact was, I wasn't even sure if he WAS a pony! The term, my little pony, didn't seem to apply. He seemed to be an alicorn of dusty light blue with a broken horn poking out from his shaggy, light green mane. He had...were those...purple dragon wings, and...ears?

RJ cleared his throat, drawing my attention back the him. “I call this meeting to discuss some issues that need settling.” He announced.

“We've got a stranger in our midst.” Trixie intoned, glancing up at me. “Not that Trixie minds. He is quite...cute.”

I blinked. Me? Cute?

“I'll get to him in a moment.” Realm waved a hoof. “First off, and I can't believe I'm repeating this, showers are encouraged, but no one hour showers anymore, please? I know we all contribute, but really, a magical hot water heater isn't cheap, and we've already gone through one this month. Lets keep bathing to no longer than twenty minutes, kay?”

“Not my fault Trixie needs a few extra minutes to keep her mane in pristine condition.” Trixie noted.

“Trix, I know you. However, I was talking more Writer.” RJ deadpanned, looking to the alicorn-dragon hybrid.

Writer, unbelievably, blushed. “Sorry. Just needed some...private time.”

Penn, who was taking notes with a quill and scroll, no idea where he got them, paused, nickering. “It's because you don't cut loose with us.”

The Pegasus rolled her eyes. “Cosmos, you know my door is always open if you need something.”

“Wide open.” Trixie snickered. The Pegasus smacked her with a wing. “Hey!” Trixie threw a pillow at her, witch was blocked with the offending wing.

Realm Jumper stamped a hoof, quieting them. “Girls, I've told you about getting along.”

“But she's so insufferable! Always talking third person? Who does that?!”

“She keeps picking on me! And she's always thinking about naughty naughty things!”

The girls kept complaining about the other, speaking very fast at the same time. Penn, ever valiant in keeping with his duties as scribe, tried to keep up with the duel whining.

“And she's such a self centered, egotistical, two bit, daughter of a bastard, third rate magician with a masochistic streak as wide as Luna's moon!”

“Enough!” Realm stood up and stomped both front hooves hard.

“What was that last part?” Penn asked, still working on his notes. “Daughter of a bastard, third rate what now?” Realm gave him a steely look. “I...will scratch that from the minutes.” He blushed, crossing out the insults.

“Now,” RJ began, taking a breath to collect himself. I guess this happened quite often. “Trixie, Gear Tech, I know you both care about each other, so please, cut the crap and spend a few nights together. I'm sure after fucking each others brains out will help you keep a cap on the attitude.”

Both Gear Tech and Trixie glanced at each other. Their mouths said 'hell no!' but their eyes said 'hello sugar~' to the suggestion.

“Now, my final point of business,” RJ smile. “Is I'd like to talk to you about a new herd member.”

I nodded. A new herd member. That was a great idea. I wounder who- Then my brain caught up with me. Wait, ME?!

“Uhh,” It was the first sound I'd uttered since before the meeting.

Realm Jumper turned to me, smiling. “You asked me why. This is why. We all have our own self doubts. Our own quirks that make us feel like we're unwanted.” He pointed a hoof to Writer, who was content to lay and watch. “He's half dragon, half alicorn. They say love is blind, but the world isn't. When he was young, the only mare he came to love led him into a trap that ended with his horn getting broken, and thus cutting off almost all flow of his magic flow. Most ponies are afraid of him because he's half dragon, so he has to hide, and because he doesn't have much magic anymore, he can't really defend himself. By all rights, the larger pony populace consider a pony like him a freak.”

I blinked. Suddenly what I had heard on Fluttershy's doorstep didn't seem as bad as before. Realm Jumper pointed at Trixie.

“Trixie is frightened of large stallions. It had to do with her being picked on and bullied a lot when she was a filly. She also has major confidence issues that make her have to exaggerate everything. It's also why she refers to herself in the third person adding the titles of 'great and powerful'. No pony would give her a chance, or give her the space needed for her to let go of the many masks she wears and be herself.”

Trixie blushed, and looked away. “I wish it were that easy.” She sighed, completely dropping any bravado she had before. “But the world is so cold.”

Gear Tech wrapped a wing around her, scooting in close so she could nuzzle the blue mare's neck. They really did seem to like each other, and all the insults were just for play.

“Gear Tech,” RJ continued. “Was involved in a magical explosion when she was younger. It blew off her leg and an ear. It took her a while, but she learned how to build magical machine prosthetic, but the magical explosion rendered her barren. There's no magic that can revers that, and most stallions want foals, so she'd never got a second look from any of them.”

My throat constricted. I couldn't even begin to imagine the pain and loss she felt.

“Penn here,” RJ continued. “He's smart, but socially so awkward that he'd try to make jokes at a funeral.”

Penn blushed hard. “I...don't get social cues well....”

RJ finally pointed at himself, his ears drooping slightly. “I myself act like a jackass in front of most ponies because I'm afraid that if I open myself up, like I do here, I'll get hurt like I have so many times in the past.”

“...So, you are all a herd?” I asked slowly. “A herd of ponies who feel like there is no love anywhere else?”

“What you have to understand about a herd,” Gear spoke up, her voice rich and vibrant of a working mare who loved to be elbow deep in grease. “Is it's not just about sex. It's not just about love. It's acceptance and unity. The lovey dovy stuff and sex just bring another dimension to our unity.”

I thought about that. “Where would I fit in?” I asked. “You all have tragic pasts. Reasons why others look away.”

RJ smiled. “Red. The thing about you is, we all find you very attractive.” I blushed. “But even more, as Penn and I got to be your friend, we saw more and more that we wanted you to be apart of this little herd. To be part of this intimate community that we've created. A place where all ponies are truly equal in the others sight.”

His words were beautiful, and brought a tear to my eye. I looked at all of them, and they seemed to share his opinion. The shattered pieces of my heart began to stir again. Maybe...I could find love again. Maybe...I already have.