“This has been a lovely little gathering. I always enjoy spending time together,” Princess Cadance said as she walked with her fellow princesses. A teasing smile lurked upon Cadance’s lips and she kept looking at Celestia as they walked.

“Another summit where we talk about peace and prosperity for all.” Princess Luna heaved a sigh. “It is too early in the day for this sort of thing. The world has become boring. I should be in bed.” Luna yawned as she walked.

Twilight Sparkle, walking beside her former teacher, glanced at Cadance, gave a nod, and then turned her head to look up at Celestia. “So… Princess Celestia… how is your most faithful student?”

Walking at a slow gait to allow the shorter legged ponies around her to keep up, Princess Celestia summoned her patience; it seemed as though she was being conspired against. She had seen the glances between Twilight and Cadance. The large white alicorn drew in a deep breath to speak, but then heard Cadance say something.

“He’s grown up quite a bit… and become quite handsome… well, handsome enough.” Cadance reached out with a wing and gave the larger alicorn beside her a nudge. “Auntie Celestia, you know, he worships you.”

Rolling her eyes, Princess Celestia sighed as she contemplated getting new underlings.

“You know, Princess Celestia, I’ve always wondered… why did you chose him as your personal, private student?” Twilight Sparkle raised one eyebrow and locked eyes with Princess Celestia. She took a great deal of personal delight in seeing the faint pink blush on her former teacher’s face.

“Yes, dear sister, do tell,” Luna said.

“Twilight Sparkle… I seem to recall that you had quite a crush on me at some point.” Princess Celestia lifted her head high. She had said this many, many years ago and it had worked then, but Twilight Sparkle didn’t quite get as flustered at the old embarrassment now. Celestia realised that she was going to have to try harder. “It seems to me that you were so stricken by your love for me that you developed a fondness for chasing after white unicorns—”

“With exquisite manners, fine feminine behaviours, and good breeding,” Luna added.

Twilight Sparkle turned a darker shade of purple and bit her lip. She was unable to say anything in her own defense. It was suddenly far too hot in this hallway and Twilight wanted to go someplace cooler, some place where she wasn’t about to die from embarrassment.

“And school teachers. We can’t forget little Twilight’s fondness for school teachers.” Princess Cadance winked at Twilight. “Ooooh… I’m a bad little foal… my homework is late… don’t punish me with the paddle, Cheerilee—”

“Cadance!” Twilight gasped. She squeezed her eyes shut, cringing, wanting to melt into the floor from embarrassment. “Cadance, we were supposed to tease Celestia, how could you?”

“An admission! Ah hah!” Celestia looked down at the flock of alicorns around her.

“Tell us what we wish to know or we shall continue with our original plan!” Luna, grinning, pulled ahead of the group as they paraded down the hallway together. “Personally, I like him. He’s witty, intelligent, and potentially the best option I have of getting my sister laid.”

“Luna!” Princess Celestia’s face looked as though she had bit into a lemon. “He is my student. I absolutely refuse to engage in any sort of inappropriate behaviours or betray his trust.”

“He’s growing up though.” Cadance prodded her aunt with her wing. “You know, it wouldn’t kill you to take him as a consort. He’s already groomed for the position. Why do you have to resist what was clearly meant to be?”

“Cadance, that’s quite enough!” Princess Celestia was now aware that she was a pink alicorn, very much like Cadance, and her full body blush was intensifying. The big mare sucked in wind, let it out in a huff, and then began to try and cool herself off. “All three of you are terrible, horrible ponies.”

“Perhaps, but we’re getting laid,” Luna replied. Turning her head, she saw her sister glowering and she heard Celestia snort. Luna let out a giggle and picked up her pace.

And then, without warning, Princess Cadance came to a dead halt. Her face darkened, her eyes closed, and she swayed from side to side, nibbling upon her own lip. Her wings fluttered at her sides and her tail swished around her legs. Cadance’s sudden stop caused the other alicorns to stop as well.

“Cadance, is there something wrong?” Twilight asked.

“No Twilight,” Cadance replied, shaking her head. “Zenith is in his room, thinking of Celestia, and doing what colts his age are known to do… mmm… it feels good.”

“Oh good grief!” Rolling her eyes, Celestia let out a frustrated huff at the alicorn of love.

“Oh… he’s working it… it’s funny…”

“Cadance, I find nothing about this funny.” Princess Celestia glared at her sister Luna, just daring Luna to say something, while Luna’s smile grew wider and wider.

“No, I mean, it’s funny… usually, when a pony does this, it is accompanied by a strong sensation of lust. It is all about self gratification—but there is love here, real love… and he’s imagining that he’s satisfying you… that’s what is getting him off.” Cadance let out a soft whinny and then shook her whole body. “I need to go find Shining Armor, excuse me.” Biting her lip, Cadance vanished in a flash of light, leaving behind the soft perfume of mare musk.

Twilight, flushed, and feeling more than a little flustered herself, could not stop thinking about white unicorns with an appreciation for finer things. She looked down the hall, her eyes coming to rest upon a door, and then, with a slow turn of her head, she looked at Celestia. “You know, visiting Canterlot always puts Rarity in a special mood… time to indulge in a little friendship with benefits.”

And then, there were two. Princess Luna, still grinning, waggled her eyebrows at her sister and then began to creep towards the door, turning her head to look at her sister as she paced forwards on silenced hooves.

“Luna, don’t you dare!” Celestia demanded in a forceful whisper. “You leave him be!”

Her lip protruding in a pout, Luna stopped. She looked at the door and then back at her sister. After taking a few moments to consider her actions, Luna realised that this was not a battle she wished to engage in. Celestia was fond of her student, and her emotions could make her more than a little unreasonable. With a wink of her teal eye, Luna vanished, leaving Celestia alone.

Taking a deep breath, Celestia thought about what to do next. Zenith was engaged in something private, but, it was daytime. He needed to be accessible during the daytime. What he did alone, in private, on his own time was his own business, but during the day, he had to be available. Princess Celestia supposed that a little lesson was in order.

Striding forward, gnawing upon her lip, Princess Celestia made ready to knock upon Zenith’s door. Standing just outside his door, Celestia heard things. His soundproofing spell needed work. She could hear the colt grunting, huffing, and snorting away, It sounded as though he was approaching climax. Shaking her head, Princess Celestia felt just a tiny bit bad for what she was about to do, but there was a lesson to be learned here. Lifting her hoof, she knocked upon the door.

“Zenith, I need to speak to you.” Celestia cringed. This was not going to be easy for either of them. She thought about what Cadance had said and then shoved the thoughts out of her mind. It didn’t matter what Zenith was doing to get off, it didn’t matter that he loved her. This was not an appropriate relationship for a teacher and a student.

“One moment please,” a deep baritone voice said from within the room.

So much had changed. When Celestia had first met Zenith, he was a squeaky little yearling. Now, on the verge of being an adult, Zenith had grown up, and he had grown up well. She had raised him—a fact that only made things even more complicated. Celestia reasoned with herself that she was practically the colt’s mother.

The door opened and Celestia let out a startled gasp when she saw Zenith. Shocked, surprised, she wondered how he had managed to do what he had just done. Not a hair was out of place. He looked cool, calm, and collected. He wasn’t breathing hard. There was nothing dangling down. There was no blush upon his face. As much she hated to admit it to herself, Princess Celestia was impressed.

“Zenith, my dear student, I need to speak to you. I have an assignment for you… there is a delicate matter that I wish for you to look after for me,” Celestia said.

“Your wish is my command,” Zenith replied, bowing his head.

There was something in the air, Celestia’s nostrils flared when she smelled it. Stallion musk. It took all of Celestia’s effort not to breathe it in deep. It was faint, almost unnoticeable, but Zenith wasn’t quite as perfect as he first appeared. Something about this caused Celestia to feel an unwanted spike of arousal.

“I fear there has been something of a succession… this is a complicated matter.”

One of Zenith’s eyebrows raised. “What?”

“Well, there is a filly that used to live in Ponyville, at the orphanarium. She grew tired of her life there. She is approaching adulthood, but is still young… worrisomely so. She has fled the orphanarium and has absconded into the White Tail Woods.” Princess Celestia paused and took a deep breath before she continued. “She has proclaimed herself a princess and made a claim on part of the White Tail Woods, announcing the formation of a new empire.”

“And you want me to quell this rebellion?” Zenith asked.

“Oh, stars no!” Celestia looked shocked and shook her head. “No, I prize your gentle nature, my most faithful student.” The alicorn took a step backwards. “I am sending you as the official Equestrian diplomat.”

“What?” Zenith blinked. “What?” He shook his head. “You are acknowledging the legitimacy of her claims?”

“What harm is there in that?” Celestia lifted her head and looked down at her student. His glasses seemed a bit fogged over, as if he had been engaged in some steamy behaviour. It was distracting to the extreme. “She might have good leadership qualities, or useful talents… if we just go and squash her, we’ll never know, will we?”

“I suppose not.” Zenith blinked a few more times. “What are my instructions?”

“Make friends with her. Assure her that Equestria, the country that currently surrounds her teeny, tiny empire, means her no harm. Convince her that we wish to remain friends. See if you can strike up a trade agreement perhaps. Do what you can to help her.”

“Wait, you’re serious about this?”

“Of course I am serious about this.” Celestia’s lips pressed into a straight line.

“Twilight Sparkle brought peace to the world. She crushed all of the thousand year old evils that had been lurking in the shadows, waiting to strike our mighty empire when we were weak. Twilight Sparkle, the Princess of Friendship, is also world renowned for being a consummate warrior. Twilight Sparkle, Princess Celestia’s champion.” Zenith heaved a sigh and shook his head. “This is a tough act to follow, you know? I get to be… Zenith Zephyr, diplomat to a runaway filly. I suppose there are worse things.”

“Twilight’s personal student will be joining you,” Celestia said. Her eyes narrowed. “You know, Pumpkin Cake is a remarkable filly… both of you are of a similar age, and both of you work so well together.”

“Is there a point to this?” Zenith asked.

“Well, yes, yes there is… have you thought about asking her on a date perhaps?” Celestia, who had a hopeful look upon her face, looked down at her student.

The colt groaned and closed his eyes. He shook his head. “No… not this again!”

“But both of you are so cute together!” Reaching out with her wing, Celestia prodded Zenith’s neck. “Come on, with a little effort, I could see this working!”

“But I don’t like her that way… we’re just friends,” Zenith protested.

“Friends could become so much more, think of the possibilities! Haven’t you listened to Twilight Sparkle’s lectures about friendship with benefits?”

“You and I, we’re friends,” Zenith said. He heard his teacher gasp and he knew that he had her on this one. He watched her back away another step. Still watching, he watched as her sides expanded as she took a deep breath.

“Before you go to Ponyville, your teacher, Moondancer, wishes to speak with you,” Princess Celestia said, changing the subject. She wasn’t admitting loss… Zenith had delivered a stunning riposte, and now Celestia was no longer in a favourable position to keep playing this game at the moment.

“Right… go talk with Professor Moondancer, then go to Ponyville, meet with Pumpkin, then go make friends with a dangerous usurper.” Zenith nodded his head. “Got it.”

“Zenith, darling, you need to get over this crush you have on me. It isn’t healthy for you… you are robbing yourself of vital life experiences that are key to your development into a healthy young adult. Your fixation on me is hurting you… you should be chasing after Pumpkin, or perhaps some other filly, somepony attainable.”

“Wasn’t it you that told me to set a goal for myself and then do everything I can to attain it?” Zenith looked at his teacher and saw the corner of her eye twitching. They had been playing this game for years, and Zenith believed that he was getting better at it.

“Zenith, what am I going to do with you?” Celestia closed her eyes and shook her head.

“Marry me,” Zenith replied as he took a step forward. “If you’d just give me a chance, I could make you happy…”

Author's Note

Did I mention that this wasn't quite intended as a clop-fic...