WAY Out of place

I walked on through town, just a little more irritated now that he was here. "I really don't see how this is entertaining to you."

"I thinks it's funny cause you look like one of those stuck up douche-bags who read poetry in those weird coffee shops." He smirked

"At least I'm not wearing the fucking sweater vest. I looked like a total jack-ass in that thing."

"You were wearing one of those with this? Dammit, I wish I saw that!" He laughed.

A small white Pegasus colt with a brown mane zipped by with a weird camera device and snapped a picture of me before zipping back off.

"Well there goes a future Wonderbolt." I said looking at the dispersing dust cloud.

"The fuck was that all about?" Bleak asked.

I made an "I don't know" sound while shrugging. We walked on, well, I walked on and he flapped by or whatever the fuck he's doing.

"Incoming." He announced calmly.

"What?" I asked before a two-liter bottle of soda hit the ground nearby to explode into a foaming mess while spiraling off. I rolled out of the way narrowly avoiding it "What the fuck!"

"Are you sure about this?" Pinkie Pie asked looking at the crates of soda bottles beside them. "I don't think ponies would find this funny."

"Sure I'm sure." Justin said as he twisted the cap off one with a sizzling puff of air. "Who doesn't like soda?"

"And who doesn't like mints?" Jeremy asked as he dropped a mint in it and resealed it before shaking it in his hooves.

"I guess so." She said still unsure

"This is gonna be so fuckin' sweet man." Justin whispered to Jeremy as they bumped hooves. He grabbed the bottle and flapped his wings before flying up. He didn't go far before spotting a Unicorn with a nice haircut and an expensive looking scarf. "Bombs away." He chuckled as the bottle slipped from his hooves.

I looked up to see my least favorite orange and maroon Pegasus flying by with wide smile.

"Oh bring it on motherfucker." I galloped in pursuit of him from the ground.

"I knew I came in at the right time." Bleak laughed. "Diet coke and mints. That's a good one." He laughed while clutching his sides and flying beside me.

"Up yours." I panted.

I ducked and weaved around other ponies, taking quick glances up to make sure I was keeping with him. He was still a ways ahead of me. He began flying over buildings and I started taking to the alleyways between them.

"Where are you going?" Bleak asked from above me.

"Shortcut." I said swerving around a corner and back onto the main street. He slowed down and flew lower. "I have you now."

He landed next to Jeremy and Pinkie Pie. "Hey who's that pony?" She asked looking in my direction.

"What?" Justin asked turning just in time to see me lunge at him in a tackle.

"I'm gonna kick your ass so hard you won't be able to sit for a month." I snarled through gritted teeth.

"Oh uh, hey man." He said nervously as his ears drooped. "Wassup?"

My brow furrowed in a scowl.

"Can't you take a joke?" He asked pressing against the ground.

I stared intently as I leaned closer, absolute fury in my eyes.

"I-I-I-I'm uh, um...Eat my ass!" He yelled as he flapped his wings and zipped out from under me, flipping me over onto my back like he pulled the carpeting out from under my hooves.

I jumped back to my hooves and sprinted off after him. Pinkie and Jeremy watched as I chased after him. "What's that word for I've seen this before?" He asked.

"Ooh, ooh! Um, gesundheit? No, no, no, au revoir? No, wait! déjà woo!"

"Yeah, I think that's it." Jeremy said as Justin flew by with me behind.

"You guys are fun, you know that?" She asked watching me jump over a few baskets of fruit after Justin.

He shrugged and grabbed one of the bottles of diet soda from the crate, twisting off the cap and chugging it down. He let out a loud burp and went back into the crate grabbing another, tossing it to Pinkie.

"Thanks." She said watching Justin Fly over head with a wave of air blowing over them. I galloped past them with a trail of dust.

He sighed and watched me weave through ponies after Justin. "I hate being a lesser character.

"Don't worry, you'll get your spotlight sometime. I did." She said smiling brightly. Her stomach made a low growl "I'm kinda hungry. You hungry?"

"I could eat."

"Let's go. I know know this great little spot!" She said bouncing off.

"What about them?" He asked pointing a hoof at me and Justin.

"They'll just tire out or one of them give up or something." She said popping up from behind him.

"Fair enough." He said following her.

I chased after Justin as he flapped erratically. "Can't you take a joke!" He asked flying over a cart

"NO!" I yelled hopping up onto it and leaping toward him. My jaw snapped and clamped down on his tail pulling him down. He let out a whinnying yelp as we plummeted.

"Please don't kill me!" He begged as he flapped and pulled, not going anywhere with his tail in my mouth.

"What is it with you two and wrecking the town?" A familiar tomboyish voice asked from behind us.

I turned pulling Justin down to see a cyan Pegasus mare with a rainbow mane.

"Not a good time Dash." I said through a mouthful of tail.

"It's not that bad." Bleak said from beside me.

I ignored him and whipped my he down, slamming Justin flat across the ground. I set my hoof down on his tail to keep him down. "So what do you want?"

"Actually, him." She said pointing at Justin as he attempted to claw his way away.

"Wait, what? I don't think I heard that right. What?" I asked.

"I'm here for him." She repeated.

"Okay, you see I'm hearing what your saying but the words are in an order that makes no sense."

"For the love of god help me you stupid dike!" Justin yelped from next to me.

I shook my head staring down at him.

"I don't exactly wanna do this, but this letter showed up out of nowhere and said I had to. Something about getting him a job and stuff." She said pulling out a letter bound by a red ribbon and a golden seal.

She set it down as it unfurled and I read it.

"Dear Rainbow Dash, blah-blah-blah, request that you take the Pegasus Justin Salada under your wing, blah-blah-blah, Princess Celestia. Dammit." I sighed. "You got lucky asshole." I said looking down to Justin.

"Stupid bitch." Bleak groaned.

I lifted up my hoof and he sprang up to his hooves running behind Dash.

"Don't think twice about smacking him upside the head." I said dusting off my hooves.

"Will do." She said taking off. Justin followed her hastily.

I turned to look toward where Jeremy and Pinkie had been to see they were gone. "Where did they go?"