Ostracized

Does it seem fun to you?

I think about many things, carefully and ahead of time. When you think about it, being a human as it is, is somewhat of a tedious task that you have to repeat for each day of your life, for years, perhaps several decades. Eat, work, sleep, repeat. It looks easy on the surface, a very undetailed lifestyle without going into complications. Weekends aren't much of an exception, but mainly you don't have work on those days. You either choose to stay at home and door whatever hobby you have, or spend those same hours outside, on physical activity or some bullshit you like to do in your life.

Does it seem fun to you?

I wouldn't know exactly. From my personal experience, if it is anything similar to this lifestyle, than no. I want that peaceful lifestyle, where there isn't any unneeded pressure on you for doings things your own way. Whether you did something wrong on not, its better to be alone, sometimes. Maybe with your family. Maybe with your girlfriend, or wife, or children etc. Me, I want that kinda life.

I must be very delusional, because if I even consider that type of lifestyle realistic, I would be insane. Because that isn't the life I have right now.

Not this one. Not even one single bit. So much... I forgot what version of this chapter that I'm currently writing in this book, because I'm trying to get my wording right. And I don't care about anything else at the moment. There really isn't much to lose.

Let me get started here.

I can't exactly remember how I got here. It's a bit foggy in my mind, but I can make a few thing out. I woke up in a mossy forest one day, which was called 'Evertree Forest' apparently, and then walked around for a few hours. I came across this small village full of ponies where I now currently reside, where I was only there for a minute before I was run out of town. Hours after that engagement, where I was hiding in a cave, a few of the ponies found me. From there, events are much clearer.

To put it lightly, they beat the shit out of me. Even when I pleaded mercy, they wouldn't stop for a good minute. I nearly went into unconscious, before some other pony came into the cave and stopped them. She was much taller and more god-like than anything I had ever seen to this day. Her name was Celestia, who's a Princess and co-ruler of this land. She... is the nicest pony or person that I have ever met, from memory. It's still surprising to me, considering the contrast from the leaders to the citizens.

Now, I'll be quick here. I don't want to write about this anymore than I have to. Those ponies who beat me up were two mares (girls in pony-form), named Applejack and... Rainbow Dash. Now, after this incident, where Celestia accepted by existence so long as I don't break any of their rules, those two still haven't apologised to me, to this day. I don't know why. In fact, the living conditions for me... its unbearable. Everypony still despises me, seeing me as some sort of monster, when I still haven't done anything wrong. I mean, at first, it was just few insults here, few cold-faced glares there. Nothing too-over the top. But over-time, the insults were becoming more... harmful on me. I have been called an ape and a furless-diamond dog, whatever the latter is. I don't know why. I've tried to come to several different conclusions, and its all inhumane.

They don't like me because I'm different? Why? Ponies have racial tendencies to anything that isn't a pony? I can't understand their reasoning, as all of my attempts to ask ponies this is... too dark for me to write in here. I'd rather not bring it up again.

But in particular, there were at least four ponies who are the closest beings to 'friends' that I have ever had in this place. Aside from the Princess, the first is a yellow pegasi named Fluttershy. She has been nice to me day-one, and doesn't cave in to her other friends' threats. I don't understand how a pony like her has friends like them. It's all too confusing for me. And the other three aren't even close to my age. They are around... maybe twelve or something. Two are the younger sisters to Fluttershy's friends, and the last one has a 'sister-like hero' who... I despise with every fibre of my being. So naturally, they forbid them from even being near me. And Fluttershy is rarely ever around, whenever I take a walk around the village of Ponyville, unoriginally named as it is.

I'm alone. I live alone, in a small, abandoned house. It's just tolerable enough for me to live in. Just. No pony cares that I live in this shithole. Who would? Honestly, if I suddenly dies here, no one would bat an eyelid and notice that I am gone. Though I doubt that, seeing as they wouldn't give me their daily insults, they would notice something. I hate mob mentalities.

I currently work on a farm. And guess who's my boss? Yep, Applejack. I only got the job when Fluttershy pushed both of us, so we both reluctantly agreed. I knew that we both hate each other, and might want to brawl against one another, but I would instantly lose that fight. She has magical strength. I have nothing to show at all. Truth be told, I don't hate her as much as I did at first. She is tolerable, when compared to other ponies. She shows very little amounts of respect towards me, but its more that I think that I'm ever going to get towards the rest of the town (aside from those four). She doesn't insult me, or physically hurt me in any way. She just gives me order, I do them in silence, and we get on with the day. I get the same attitude from her slightly bigger brother, who looks like he wants to kill me if he has the chance. But he is awfully quiet. And that is scary. And their younger sister is one who I consider my friend, so during work hours, she is banned to her room form early all day, or just away from the orchard.

And at the end of the day, when I get my pay in the form of apples (my only source of food in this world) I usually rest by myself in the park, or out in the plain field behind the village. At least in those places, its something near peaceful. I hate the smell of dust. Thankfully it rarely rains. When it does...

I hate her. I fucking hate her. Not enough to take her life, because it isn't worth it, and that I don't think I could kill any pony. Rainbow Dash really takes the largest prize for being the biggest asshole that I've ever met, and that really is saying something. In reality, I called her plothole because that makes sense in pony terms. Plot means Ass here. The result of that is she would just get even more pissed, and will occasionally smack me. Actually, I have to give her some respect. At least she is the only one brave enough to hit me. Sadly, I don't retaliate. Because it's not my nature. And that is why she isn't stopping any time soon. She is still the pony I hate the most over these past few months. Actually, I do have some sort of fun, where my only retaliation is just insulting her back. We would go back and forth... and it will only end in pain.

I gotta say, for ponies, they really hurt a lot.

Really, I want friends in this world, but I guess fate or something else wants me to suffer, so I only end up with pain, insults, spitting... you name it. If they all decide to act nice, all of a sudden, especially Rainbow Dash because for whatever reason, they can still go fuck themselves. They don't realise how much pain they've enacted onto me. They don't care. Realistically, they won't ever care. Loyal bitches.

I hope, one day... that will change.