Somebody Stop Me!!
Chapter 1
(Mask P.O.V) (Equestria, Canterlot Royal stone garden present time)
“Well look who is back from Ponyville.” I said in telepathy to Discord as the guards put him back in the same spot he was at early today.
“Don’t mock me Mask. I’am not in the mood.” Discord grumble back at me.
“What?” I asked in a confuse tone of voice before I walk out of my statue with a big grin then walk over to Discord as I continue speaking. “I’am just welcoming you back from failing to take over Equestria and all that chaos jazz.”
If Discord could move right now he would look at me jaw dropped and widen eyes in shock at what I just did. “Y-You are free?! But how?” He asked still shocked to which I grin at.
“Oh silly Dissy. I could of gotten out of my statue a 1000 years ago. The only reason I stay in there was to give old Sunbutt and Moonbutt a 1000 year long holiday from me.” I said to which Discord deadpanned at me.
“Really?” He asked.
“Yes. Equestria has changed a lot since your dear old Uncle Mask was away. New places, new rules and even new bearers of the Elements of Harmony.?” I frown at that but my grin soon return with a fury. “But now I’am tanned, I’am rested and I’am ready to give old Equestria a wedgie again.” I said as I step away from Discord.
“Wait! Where do you think your going?” He asked sounded accused at me and a bit worried.
“Well I am going to say hello to old cake butt and the new bearers and then I will go find a night club to party all night long. But first!” I said as I went behind Discord and grab his backside as if he wasn’t in stone and he was wearing underwear and pull up over his head.
“STONE WEDGIE!!!! Hahahahaaha!!” I laugh as I left him screaming in rage as I spin my tornado to the castle giving wedgies to guards or make them look silly that are in my way as I go.
Once I got inside the castle I then active my invisiwatch to make myself invisible before I continue walking to the throne room. Why the throne room some of you may asked. Well that’s where Celestia and everybody else is at to celebrate the Mane 6’s victory over Discord. Anyway I enter the throne room (still invisible) and walk up to where I will be right behind Celestia waiting for the right moment.
Right now Celestia is giving out a speech on how heroic the Mane 6 are for beating Discord. If you ask me that speech makes me want to puke into someone’s underwear before I wedgie him or her.
Just then a guard that I had wedgie came blusting into room and right up to Celestia in a panic. How I know he was wedgie you may ask. Simple. He was running like he got something stuck up his ass.
“Princess! A green headed creature and wearing a yellow suit has given me and my men wedgies and it is now in the castle.” The guard said panting from the running all the while Celestia stares at him wide eyed due to she knows who he is talking about.
“Mask.” She said to herself quietly before she ordered the crowd to leave. Which took 10 minutes. After that it was only Celestia, the guard, the mane 6 and myself are still in the throne room.
“Princess. What’s going on?” Asked Twilight Sparkle (teacher’s pet) looking confused and a bit concern as well as the rest of her friends. Except for Pinkie Pie who was looking around the room trying to spot me.
“I will explain later my little ponies. But first we need to find Mask before he causes anymore harm. He could be anywhere in this castle.” Celestia said as they were about to leave the room but not before I made my move.
I walk closer to Celestia’s backside then I grab her panties without her notice, deactivate my invisiwatch and put my mouth near her ear and say. “Right behind you.” After that she froze in place and before anyone could react I pull Celestia’s panties up and over her head.
“ROYAL WEDGIE!!!! Hahahaha!” I laughed as the mane six gasped at what I just did to their Princess. Who is now trying get her panties off her head without ripping it. Kind of too late for that since her horn had punched a hole through it. In the end she just sighed and rip her panties off (which made Rarity gasped) and glares at me with a twitchy left eye. “I have waited over a 1000 years to give you a wedgie again. And I must say your ass is bigger than I remember.” I said which added a blush to a still glaring Celestia.
“How did you get free from stone and what do you want Mask?” Celestia asked giving me a twitchy eye glare while I have notice Rainbow Dash flying at me. Which I simple step aside while holding out a cream pie that made contact with Rainbow’s face and made her crashed to the ground in a daze.
“RAINBOW!!!!” I hear her friends shout as they rush over to their creamed friend.
“To answer your question Celly very easy. Enough that I could have gotten out my statue at time after you stoned me.” I said which Celestia look at me wide eyed as I continue. “As for what I want. Is to say hi to you along with looking around Equestria and to find a night club. So I can party all night long.” I said as Celestia’s eye twitch even more at me in annoyance.
“If you think we are going to let you walk out of here after what you just did. Then think again.” Said a glaring Twilight Sparkle and her friends after Rainbow Dash shake off her daze.
“Hmm. Your right. I will just spin my way out.” I said as I spin into my tornado and went past the Mane six (which cause them to spin around for a minute) right out the door and speeding out of the castle. When the Mane six stop spinning all six of them have their panties right over their heads. No doubt that the Mane six would want to catch me now even without old Suncakebutt “asking” them to do so.
“Hehe Good luck with that Mane six.” I thought to myself as I spin my way out of Canterlot.
(third P.O.V)
Unknown to Mask three beings, that was standing on top of the roof of the throne room, was watching him from what did in the room up to he left Canterlot. These beings are black furred with white feet, white faces and red noses. All three of them also wear white gloves.
“Well this is a fun way to start the “Somebody stop me” story. Wouldn’t you agree Ace?” One of the beings that was wearing a light blue shirt and a red hat asked the tallest one out of all three of them that wears a light brown jeans. Who just sighed at the question.
“Yes Wakko it is. Also we are not using our human names anymore so call me Yakko.” Said Yakko as Wakko rubbed the back of his head sheepishly as Yakko was about to continue talking when he notice the only female of the three ,who’s wears a pink skirt and a yellow flower on top of her head, was looking up in the sky and she look like she was thinking about something.
“Hey Dot. What are thinking about?” Wakko asked as Dot turn to look at him.
“Oh I was justing thinking about when Mask wedgied the Mane six. I could swear that I heard Fluttershy moaning in pleasure.” Dot said as she along with Yakko and Wakko turn to look at us readers.
“Goodnight everybody!” Yakko said waving at the readers. After that the three Warner siblings then jump off of the castle and ran to the train station without anyone noticing them.
To be continue
Chapter 2
(Mask’s Equestria, Castle of the royal pony sisters Everfree Forest)
“Oooh yeah! It feels good to be free and to give old suncakebutt and the Mane six a long overdue wedgies.” Mask said to himself as he enter the old castle in the Everfree Forest. “But I think Fluttershy had enjoyed the wedgie a lot. Hmm She must be the 1000 times great granddaughter of my student's busty friend Posely.” Mask said has he stop at the old throne room as he was now thinking about his two students Surprise and the flat chested Vinyl Scratch.
“Oh right. The next thing I got to do is find Surprise’s mask that had a copy of her soul in it. But what did she do with it?” He asked himself as he just notice what look like to be a bronze Gate Switch that is laying on Celestia’s old throne. “Ooh. Finders keepers!” He said as he pick up the Gate Switch.
“If you need aid, call on the stars and Switch on!”
“Ooh. A Displaced token? Sweet! I could the help. Hey Starman. Switch yourself over here.” Mask said as he messed with the gate switch.
A wormhole of white energy appeared, out of which shot Fourze on his bike. Unfortunately for Mask, he was in the way of said bike.
“Now I know what roadkill feels like.” Mask said as he was as flat as a pancake with tire tracks in the middle of him from his nuts to his face on the ground.
“Oh man,” Fourze said as he dismounted and went to check on him, “it’s my first time going to another… oh shit, I don’t have any aspirin.”
“No worries.” Mask said as he stick a thumb into mouth and started blowing up like a balloon until he was no longer flat. “You’re the first Displaced I’ve summoned since I got out of stone not too long ago.” He added as he offer an hand to shake. “The name is the Mask. What’s yours?” He asked.
“Name’s Jack,” he said as he dispelled his transformation, “and I know who you are, I’ve seen the movie. You are the movie version right?”
“I am more of the cartoon version because I love to give people or ponies wedgies.” Mask said with a big grin on this face.
“Okay,” Jack said as he cinched his belt a little tighter, “I was worried that you’d be the comic version actually, that would have been bad.”
“Nah. I never liked the comic version. It was too messy.” Mask said as he remembered what he summon Jack for. “Right now I need your help me find a mask that one of my students and I made a long time ago.” Mask said to Jack.
“Phew, I thought that your request might be something grade-A nuts,” Jack said as he reached into his backpack, “luckily, I’ve got just the thing to help.” With that, he pulled out the Burgermeal and Potechokin Foodroids, and their Switches. “Shutter, Chips, time to go to work,” he said as he installed the Switches.
“Uh.. What with the fast food bases bots and do you know what the mask I am looking for looks like?” Mask asked as he was holding a knife and fork in his hands.
“They’re designed for searching for stuff,” Jack said as they unfolded, “and you’ve got a picture, right?”
“Sure.” Mask said as he took a picture of himself, Surprise and a flat chested Vinyl Scratch hold a white colour wooden mask that look like it would fit on a pony’s face with a golden bar in the middle of it. “This mask has a copy of my best student Surprise’s soul in it. So I need to find it and a pony to be the mask’s host.” He added as he points to Surprise that’s on the picture.
“I’ll help you find the mask,” Jack said, “but you need to find someone to wear it on your own. So, think you can find it?”
“I think so,” said Shutter, pointing her head, “I can sense something with the same kind of magic as this guy over that way.”
“Well then,” said Chips, “let’s get moving.”
With that, Shutter and Chips hopped down from Jack’s hands and rolled off, Jack and Mask close behind.
“Hmm. I wonder how Vinyl been doing while I was in stone?” Mask asked himself as they was walking in the Forest.
“Don’t look at me,” Jack said, “this is your dimension.”
“Well I don’t know what Vinyl has been doing since she became a busty vampire over a 1000 years ago. Maybe she is in Ponyville like all the other dimension Vinyls lives.” Mask said with a shrug. “I am surprised that you wasn’t surprised at I had students.” He added.
“To be honest,” Jack said, “you having students is actually relatively normal compared to some of the other stuff that’s happened to me since, you know.”
“You getting stoned by suncakebutt and moonpiebutt?” Mask asked sadly.
“Oy,” said a voice from Jack’s pack, “call Princess Luna that again and I’ll light you up like a Hearth's Warming Tree!”
“So who’s Luna’s little lover you got in your pack?” Mask asked with a snicker.
Jack sighed as he pulled the Elec Switch from his pack, “Remember when I said I’ve gone through wierd stuff? Well, every celestial object, including the stars, has a spirit associated with it, and I’ve gotten saddled with looking after said spirits. Meet Ampere, spirit of the constellation of the Core Arena, and a grade-A gladiator when she was alive. By the way, she’s one of the few spirits that respects the princesses, so I’d apologize if I were you.”
“Why? Is it because she gives Luna a shocking good time in bed?” Mask asked laughing a little.
“THAT’S IT!!!” Ampere shouted, “Jack, Elec States, I want to wipe that smug look off his face.”
Jack sighed, “Amp, I know he’s pissing us off, but I’d rather just finish this and go home so that we can forget we ever met him, okay?”
“Fine,” said Amp, “but the next time we meet, he’s a lightbulb.”
“Grees. I guess someone can’t take a joke. Am I right.” Mask asked while looking at the readers before they continue walking to get out of the forest.
After a few minutes, they arrived at a cottage that Jack recognized. “Hey,” said Jack, “isn’t this Fluttershy’s place?”
“Yeah. She’s the mare that got turned on from when I wedgied her, her friends and Celestia after I got out stone and wedgied Discord’s statue.” Mask said with a laugh.
Jack palled. “Hey Chips.”
“Yeah?”
“Do you think the Medical Switch will come with brain bleach?”
“It’s Switch 24, we’ve only got to 12, it’ll be far too late by the time it becomes available.”
“Dang it.”
Just then they heard Fluttershy moaning loudly in pleasure from in her cottage. The two quickly ran to look in living room window to see a bear giving Fluttershy a wedgie.
“Yep. She is Posey's 1000 times great granddaughter.” Mask said as he sees Fluttershy’s huge breasts bouncing about.
Jack turned away, “It is a testament to how badly I want that image out of my head that I am considering asking you to do it.”
“Do what?” Asked a voice from behind the two. Which they turn around to see it was Yakko, Wakko and Dot standing there.
Jack groaned, “Just when I think this day couldn’t get any weirder, it does. If Murphy’s Law was made into a Switch, it would trigger a States Change for sure.”
“Murphy has a Switch?” Yakko asked confused.
“I would love to turn his switch on.” Dot said with a wink.
“Good night everybody!” Both Yakko and Mask said while they wave to the readers while Wakko went into the cottage without anyone seeing them. Well, almost anyone.
“Um,” Shutter said, “is he allowed to go in there?”
“Uh..Well..” Dot was about to answer when they hear Fluttershy’s quietly shouting from inside as Wakko came running out with the mask in hand as he was being chased by Fluttershy.
“Give that back!” Fluttershy yelled quietly as she chased Wakko around the cottage.
“So,” said Jack, “you want to help him out, or make some popcorn?”
“Popcorn?” Mask offered as he got a bag of popcorn while watching Yakko and Dot were now helping Wakko with playing keep away with Fluttershy.
“Guess that answers my question,” Jack said as he helped himself to a handful.
“Please give it back?” Fluttershy begged as she fail to catch the mask for the second time as it was being throwed by one Warner to the other.
“You got to catch it first.” Dot said with a giggle as she throw the mask to Wakko but Fluttershy caught it this time. Just not the way Fluttershy wanted to catch it as it landed on her face.
“Hey! It’s stuck.” Fluttershy said in a panic as she try to pull the mask off but it quickly covering her head as lightning started coming out of nowhere.
“Um, I am feeling very nervous right now,” said Jack.
“Help me.” Was all Fluttershy could say before she start spinning in a tornado with a yellow,white and pink colour as it knock the Warners and some trees down.
“I love doing those tornados.” Mask said while eating some popcorn.
A few minutes later the tornado stopped and in its place was a white fur pegasus mare with same kind suit Mask is wearing but in a pink colour and the same kind of mane and tail as Pinkie Pies but in a yellow colour.
“Smmoookeen!” The mare said happily while striking a pose.
“Well, this is going to be interesting,” said Jack, “one way or the other.”
“I will say.” Mask said to Jack before looking back at the mare. “Long time no see Surprise.” He said to the mare who look back at him with a huge smile on her face.
“Hi Mask it’s great to finally see you again.” Surprise said as she gave Mask a big hug.
“Same here.” Mask said to Surprise before looking at Jack. “Thanks for the help. And would you like to come with us to a nightclub before you go?” He asked as he notice the sun was almost down.
“No thanks,” Jack said, “I’ve already seen enough, I should go before I develop the urge to scour my retinas with napalm.”
“Ok. Let me just make a token so you or any other Displaced can call me.” Mask said as he gets out a pair of underwear with pictures of a green wooden mask on them from his jacket. “This is the Mask and if you need a helping hand or want someone to get wedgied. Just wave this underwear like you just don’t care.” Mask said as he threw the underwear into the void and Jack got a copy of the underwear.
“Yeah,” Jack said as he held it out at arm’s length, “just switch off my Token to send me back, I’d rather not have to deal with any more insanity today.”
“Ok. Before I do. Surprise has got something to say before you go.” Mask said as Surprise was behind Jack as she grab his underwear.
“WEDGIE!” Surprise yelled as she pull Jack’s underwear right over his head just as Mask hit the off switch to Jack’s token.
“That’s it, I’m having fried nutjob the next time I see either of you!” Jack shouted as he was swept up in a wormhole.
“Ha. Gaaaayyy!” Surprise shouted with a giggle just as the wormhole closed.
“You did well my student. Now let’s go to a nightclub so we can party all night long.” Mask said as he gave Surprise an hugged.
“And maybe we will find Vinyl there?” Surprise asked happily.
“Of course we will. It’s going to be in the next chapter.” Mask said as the two walk off while leaving Yakko, Wakko and Dot laying on the ground out cold.
To be continue.
Author's Note
This was a crossover with cyberlord4444's Friendship Kita!!!!. https://www.fimfiction.net/story/316637/friendship-kita
