How to Take Over Equestria in Ten Easy Steps

Step Two

Discord and I had been sitting behind the same dumpster for about two hours, and did nothing. Well, except get a bag of flour dumped on my head as Mr. Cake threw it out the back door. I couldn’t take it any more, it was so boring. So boring in fact, that I could have sworn that I passed out at least twice.

“Now?” I asked for probably the twenty third time. “For the last time, not yet.” Discord whispered back. “But why?” I groaned while sliding to the ground. “Because if he sees us then our cover is blown. If our cover is blown then we might never stop him.” Discord explained. I almost gave up my complaining until a thought poked its way into my head. Now I don’t like to be manipulative, but when you're dealing with the spirit of chaos, it might be the only option. “I thought we were going to save Equestria, but nooo Discord is afraid.” I said, rolling my eyes. That got his attention. “I am not afraid.” Discord protested. “Yeah you are, you would rather sit and hide in an alleyway than do anything of importance.” I said, continuing the charade. “I’d like to see you come up with a better plan.” Discord said, challenging me. “How about, you open that book up and see what our little friend will be up to next so we can beat him to the punch.” I said with confidence. “Fine!” Discord said, teleporting the book into his hand. “But just for the record.” He said before teleporting next to me and whispering in my ear. “I knew you were playing me the whole time.” He said with a chuckle. Opening the book to the next section, my eyes scanned the page and began to read.

STEP TWO

Reveal Yourself

So, you’re finally ready for step two. (That or you realized just how boring hiding is.)

I shot Discord a quick glare to which he shrugged and smiled sheepishly.

This is where the plan finally takes off. Your next mission is to form an alliance. Or as those aggravating sisters in charge would say, you need to get some “friends.” This might be a challenge for you since you are the type of person to want total control over everyone so I’ll give you some tips.

Act helpless.

Most ponies cannot resist feeling empathy towards someone in need. Simply act like you need help with something and you can spark up conversation from there.

Be polite

Strange as it seems, most ponies don’t like it when you are rude or unkind to them. As painful as it might be, just bite your tongue if a mean thought creeps in your head and save it for later.

Keep the focus on them

The less your “friends” know about your plans the better. Keep them occupied by talking about themselves and what they like. If you need to talk about yourself have some sort of backstory and something you can relate on.

Repeat until group is large enough.

Just keep using these tips to gain more trust and more allies. “Large enough” is a vague description. I’d say a group of a few ponies, let’s just say six, should be good enough. After you know your friends and you know that they have your back, you can move on to step three.

“Allies?” I asked nervously. “This book makes it sound like we are going to war.”

“Well, I suppose in one sense we are.” Discord reasoned. “Granted, this book allows the user to win easily.” He added.

“Let’s just hope it doesn’t come to that.” I muttered, putting the book away again.

“So where do you and your friends normally hang out?” Discord asked casually.

“What?” I asked, raising an eyebrow.

“We need to get a group of your friends together to stop your clone from taking over, remember?” He said, jokingly knocking on my forehead with his claw.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know the plan.” I said pushing his claw away.

“So where can we find your friends?” He asked again.

“Well, I don’t really have many close friends. It’s always just been me and Lily running the Library.” I shrugged.

“Don’t you know anybody else?” Discord asked.

“Oh of course! I know of a lot of ponies, I’ve met them. I just don’t know a lot of them.” I replied sheepishly.

“So you’re telling me that you have to actually go make friends?” Discord said rubbing his temples.

“Maybe not.” I realized. “Twilight and her friends! They are always saving Equestria from danger. I’m sure they can help.” I exclaimed.

“You’re right. They’ve helped me defeat evil a few times. I’m sure that we can convince them.” Discord said grabbing onto my shoulder.

“Yeah...wait, helped you?”

“To the castle!” Discord shouted, dropping me to the ground.

After picking myself off of the ground and following Discord I came to a shocking realization.

“Twilight, Fluttershy, Rarity, Applejack, Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie...that’s six!”

“What?” Discord replied, his head turning around to face me.

“We have to go. Now!” I said, sprinting towards Twilight’s castle.

===============

We must have looked very spastic as we ran towards Princess Twilight’s castle because nearly every single pony we passed shot us a disturbed glance. By the time we reached the front doors I was completely out of breath along with Discord who was a few feet behind me.

“Quick question…” Discord huffed, sweat pouring down his face. “Yeah…” I sighed in response. “You have wings and I can teleport through time and space.” Discord said while creating a towel out of his tail. “Why did we run here?” I slumped to the ground in annoyance while letting out a big sigh. “I don’t know I panicked. Why didn’t you remind me before we got here?” I sighed again, shooting Discord a quick glare. “Fine.” He responded. With a click of his fingers we were back in the alleyway we started from. “You have wings and I can teleport through time and space.” “Nevermind!” I shouted. “Now, quick! Take us back.” I demanded. In a flash we were back in front of the castle. “What’s the rush?” Discord asked. “The book specifically specified that six ponies were enough for the group. Since the mane six are the most powerful ponies in Ponyville, my clone might be here.”

“We have to get them on our side before he does!” Discord exclaimed.

“Right, which is why we probably should have stopped talking and I should have just barged in without explaining anything!” I shouted back. “Okay!” Discord replied. I quickly ran to the front doors and threw them open to reveal the group of ponies inside. Looking up I saw Twilight Sparkle and her friends looking towards me. “Oh, hello Glasswing! You never mentioned that you had a twin brother!” She said with an innocent smile.

===============

I’m not sure how long Discord and I stood there dumbfounded. It was like time had stopped all together. Looking forward I saw the mane six staring quizzically towards me and there, in the middle of the group, was the doppelganger with the biggest smile on his face. Realizing that I had to say something, my mind went into overdrive, searching desperately for the words, any words for that matter. “Uhhh…” I squeaked out. Suddenly the doppelganger slowly got up and began to speak. “I’m sorry girls, I have to apologize for not mentioning it. I believe my brother was about to explain why you’ve never heard of me.” He said shooting me a subtle smirk. Trying desperately I thought of what to say to expose him for the liar he was. “Uhhh…” I failed miserably. “I’ll explain.” The clone said walking towards me. “When Glasswing moved to Ponyville, I began studying cultures all around the world. I hadn’t always gotten the opportunity to write, so we never kept in touch.” The clone went on. “Uhh…” I said again, my mind screaming at me to say something with a hint of intelligence. “Anyways, I just got back to Equestria so I decided to pay my brother a surprise visit. That’s probably why he never mentioned me.” He said will giving me a pat on the back.

The group nodded their heads in agreement as the bought the lie.

“Now if you excuse me,” The clone began again. “My brother and I have some catching up to do. We won’t be long.” He said while guiding me into the neighboring room.

As the door shut my mind finally processed what had just happened. As I turned to confront the doppelganger, a strong hoof pinned me to the wall by my chest.

“Gah!” I cried out in shock.

“Listen to me you little pest!” He spat out in anger. “I have big plans for Equestria and you are not about to get in my way!” He said as he stared at me maliciously.

“What plans. Who? Me? Get in the way. Ha ha ha…” I replied playing dumb, my voice fading out nervously.

“You think I was born yesterday?” The clone replied.

“Actually a few hours ago.” I replied. “But continue.”

Sighing my “evil twin” continued.

“I know that I am simply a magical conjuring of a book made by Discord. However, that only makes my mission of taking over Equestria more important to my existence.” It stated. “I learned about the main six and, using your past interactions with them, befriended them to help my cause.” He said.

“But they would never help you take over Equestria!” I protested.

“No, but they will help make the job a whole lot easier.” He said bluntly.

He lowered me from the wall and began to walk back into the main room.

“Oh by the way,” He began “Mention this to anyone...and the mane six, along with everyone you ever cared about, is dead.” He said as he walked out the room.

Nervously, I followed him out. On the other side of the door, the mane six was standing with concerned looks on their faces. Behind them was Discord with a triumphant smile.

“I told them everything, Glass.” Discord said happily.

My eyes went wide as I looked at my double. Strangely, he didn’t look angry or concerned.

“Discord mentioned that you are Glass Wings “evil twin” here to take over Equestria.” Twilight said solemnly.

“Oh really?” My twin responded without a hint of emotion.

“That’s not true is it?” Fluttershy whispered.

There was a moment of silent tension before the clone spoke again.

“I don’t know brother.” He said turning to me. “Is it?”

Remember when I said I made a few mistakes that day? Well, saying what I said next, was mistake number three.

“No it’s not.” I said to the group.

“What?” Discord said in shock.

“Yeah, it was just a game that my brother and I used to play. Everywhere we went, one of us was always the “evil twin”.” I lied.

The group let out a sigh of relief as they bought another lie.

“Well I’m glad we got that sorted out.” The clone said giving me another side hug.

Pulling me in he whispered to me quickly. “Don’t let it happen again.”

Removing myself from the hug I walked over to Discord.

“Let’s go.” I muttered bitterly.

===============

Walking out of the castle, Discord floated next to me shaking his head.

“Why didn’t you expose him are you crazy? ‘Cause I think you’re crazy, and I know crazy?” He exclaimed.

“I panicked. He said he was going to hurt everyone if I told anyone.” I replied.

“Well, he does have the ability to.” Discord said, remembering what tricks he gave the clone.

“I was nervous, I didn’t want to lose everyone.” I sighed sitting down on the ground.

“Well at least you had a good reason.” Discord said, creating a lounge chair out of nowhere to sit on.

“So what now?” I said, looking back to the castle.

“We still need allies of some kind if we want to stand a chance against him.” Discord said while flipping through a magazine he created.

Sighing, I closed my eyes to think for a bit. However, I wasn’t thinking for too long before I was paid a little visit.

“LOOK OUT!” Said a voice from above.

My eyes shot open to see a gray pegasus dive bombing straight for me and Discord. Well just me, Discord had already teleported away to cover. Looking back up to the pony, I closed my eyes and braced myself.

The collision hadn’t hurt too much. Especially since I was used to it. Derpy visited the library often while she was delivering mail. She fell on me at least 3 times a month.

“Ugh...Hey Derpy.” I groaned in pain as I pushed her up off the ground.

“Sorry Glass, I just got caught in a strong wind and lost balance.” The mailmare said, blushing.

“No problem Derpy.” I said, picking myself off the ground.

“Hey are you and Lily still on for game night on Thursday?” She asked cheerfully.

Right, game night. Game night was the place where the few ponies that I did know would get together and hang out. We weren’t a very large group but we did have fun.

“Maybe, I don’t know. I’m kinda dealing with something right now.” I replied, sadly.

“Oh okay, no problem friend. Maybe next week.” Derpy said, slowly flying away.

“Right.” I muttered in response. “Wait…friend?”

I am such a moron sometimes.

“Derpy!” I yelled quickly flying to her level. “I think you can help with my problem.”

“Of course Glass Wing. What do you need me to do?” She asked with a smile.

“I need you to get everyone that goes to game night and bring them to the Library. I’ll tell you more when you get there.” I said quickly.

“Sure!” Derpy said happily.

“Thank you so much!” I said as she flew away.

I landed on the ground and saw Discord with a confident smile.

“I take it you have a plan?” He chuckled.

“One that I should have thought of a while back.” I said looking for a way back to the library. “Consider step two finished. We aren’t out of this game yet.” I said as we both started back to the library.

“You know I can teleport us.” Discord said, still standing in the same spot.

“Just let me have this one!” I shouted back to him.

As Discord began chasing after me I looked back to see my copy staring at us through the castle window. Letting out a nervous gulp, I turned my attention toward getting back to the library as fast as we could...and to step number three.