Twilight Sparkle is an Assassin

After recovering her sais, and using one of the dead bandit’s coats to wipe the blood off of them, she collected some rope from her saddlebags and tied up the bandit she had put to sleep. She then hid the other bandit’s bodies in the forest where they wouldn’t be found, or stumbled across by travelers any time soon.

With the dead bodies now well hidden away, and her prisoner secured, Twilight began dragging the unconscious bandit’s body back to the picnic blanket.

“You’re gonna be in big trouble when I tell the princess you tried to rob us.” Twilight said rather sternly.

The bandit remained silent, so Twilight left him slumped against a nearby tree and went back to humming a cheerful tune as she set up the rest of the picnic.

“Honestly, Celestia, We have no idea what the problem is!”

“The problem is, Luna, you broke tradition by teleporting here!”

Twilight looked up at the sound of Celestia and Luna’s voices approaching down the track they had come, her muzzle breaking out in a happy smile at the sight of the Night Princess. With an even happier ‘squee’ Twilight bounded up to her.

“Oh for the love of...”

Whatever Luna was about to say was lost as Twilight jumped up and wrapped her forelegs around the princess’s neck and began eagerly nuzzling her.

“Princess Luna! Why didn’t you tell us you were coming?”

Luna giggled at the ticklish sensations she was receiving from Twilight’s fuzzy muzzle assaulting every inch of her face and neck it could reach.

“‘Twas a spur of the moment decision, Twilight Sparkle. And is it just us, or have thee gotten more adorably cute since the last time we saw thee.”

Twilight gave a little whine of displeasure, and booped Luna on the nose.

“I’m not adorable, or cute! I’m mean and fearsome! So mean in fact, I ate the last of the cookies before we left without sharing any! And so fearsome I scared a kitten up a tree!”

“D’awwwwwww!” Luna cooed, using her magic to levitate Twilight to the ground where she pinned the smaller mare on her back.

“‘Twas very naughty of thee, Twilight. And thou knowest what happens to naughty fillies that steal cookies and scare kittens.”

Twilight’s eyes widened in fear and she began trying to squirm away from the smirking Princess.

“They get tickled!”

“Princess Celestia! Help!”

But it was too late for Twilight, as Luna began using her hooves and wingtips to mercilessly tickle her exposed belly. She began laughing uncontrollably and tried to curl up to protect her sensitive belly, but Luna’s magic kept her helplessly exposed. Twilight squealed loudly as Luna lowered her head and began giving her tummy loud raspberries.

“Stop!” Twilight pleaded, trying to shove Luna’s hooves away. “I can’t take it anymore!”

“No mercy!” Lune declared, redoubling her tickling efforts.

Thankfully, Celestia soon took pity on her poor assassin, and rescued Twilight from Luna’s clutches. Twilight immediately darted underneath her mentor and poked her tongue out at Luna, who returned the gesture.

“Must you keep tormenting Twilight? She’s supposed to be on duty right now, and having you distract her from that is not wise, especially this close to the Griffon Kingdom’s border. Speaking of duties, where is your assassin, sister?”

Luna sighed and began walking down the path, to the place where the picnic was set up.

“Trixie is hiding around here somewhere. She is still determined to get the drop on Twilight, one of these days.”

At the mention of Trixie’s name, Twilight began carefully scanning the bushes and tree tops for Luna’s escort. It was a game the two of them played whenever they went out into the field, and one Twilight had yet to lose.

Celestia chuckled lightly at her student’s antics. “Well, Twilight didn’t become the most deadliest assassin in Equestria by being easy to sneak up on. I fear Trixie will be hard pressed to...”

“Actually,” Twilight said, blushing brightly and not being able to meet any of the princesses’ gazes, “I accidentally dropped my guard when I was setting up the picnic and some bandits took me by surprise.”

Twilight latched onto her princess’s leg and looked up at Celestia with worried, pleading eyes.

“I’m really, really, really sorry Princess. Please don’t fire me! I promise it won’t happen again!”

Celestia leaned down and gave Twilight—her friend and guardian—a reassuring nuzzle. “We all make mistakes sometimes, my little assassin. The best thing we can do is learn from them and not to repeat them.”

Twilight sucked in a deep, calming breath and smiled up at her princess. “I will learn from this, princess. From now on, my head is on a swivel! Speaking of which, I got a certain assassin to hunt down before she gets me.”

Twilight was about to slink into the forest, but she suddenly stopped and turned back to Celestia.

“Thank you for not firing me!” she called out, before slipping away into the bushes.

As soon as Twilight was out of sight, Celestia led the way back to where the picnic blanket was set up,.The two princesses only gave the bound unconscious bandit a cursory glance before settling down.

“Something is bothering you, Luna,” Celestia observed as she made sandwiches with the daffodils she’d picked. “Ever since I brought up Trixie’s name you’ve been... distant. You hid it well, but I noticed it nonetheless.”

Luna sighed and began chewing on one of the carrots. “We are worried about Trixie. She’s been acting rather... umm... odd? It started a few months ago, when she came back from the mission in the Crystal Empire, and it’s only been getting worse ever since.”

“Odd, in what way?”

“Well, she doesn’t talk to us as much as she used to, and whenever we strike up conversation, she merely gives us vague, incomprehensive replies. W-We don’t think she enjoys our company anymore.”

Luna let out a heavy sigh and began fiddling with a loose thread on the picnic blanket. “We are not sure what we did wrong to warrant her coldness.” A sniffle. “We miss our snuggles, and chats, and our play fights. Oh Tia, what do we do? We don’t want to replace her, but if she’s not able to communicate with us and trust us completely...”

Celestia moved close to her worried, younger, sibling and draped a wing over her. “The bond between a princess and her personal assassin is a very close one, it’s that bond of complete trust and honesty between us, that allows us to work so well together. If that bond ever becomes compromised, than you must do everything in your power to strengthen and repair it. Have a talk with Trixie, Luna, and fix whatever it is that has affected your special bond.”

“Thou art right, sister,” Luna said with a resolute nod. “As soon as Trixie returns we will talk with her. Thankest thou for pointing us in the right direction, dear sister.”

Twilight Sparkle examined her environment with a keen, eagle-like, awareness. She was looking for anything that was out of place in the forest. A broken twig, a piece of fabric, even a smell, just anything that would give her a clue as to where her adversary was.

And her adversary was certainly a cunning one, after all, it had taken all her skills and cunning to stay one step ahead of Trixie, and still, she had some very close calls.

Twilight’s ears twitched in the direction of a new sound out of place, and she could have sworn she glimpsed a flicker of Trixie’s blue cape. Moving more quietly than ghost, Twilight slid from her hiding place inside a bush and began taking a parallel course to intercept the glimpse of blue she had spotted.

As she walked, her gaze was constantly glancing in different directions, trying to spot any traps or ambushes Trixie may have planted for her. Though she did have to resist humming her happy tune, this mission was all about stealth and sneakiness.

Another tiny noise alerted her to the fact that she was getting closer to her target, so she ducked into another bush to hide while she considered her options.

Trixie was no doubt giving her just enough clues and signs to make sure she stayed on her trail, without being too obvious about it. It had been Twilight herself that had taught Trixie that particular skill, so she recognized it as easily as she recognized her own adorable reflection in the mirror.

But there was one thing Twilight could never be sure of. And that was if Trixie had modified or altered the trick to lull her into a false sense of security. If that was the case, Twilight knew she was going to have to be extra vigilant and sneaky, if she wanted to keep her perfect record of never being tagged by a fellow assassin. Biting her lip in concentration, Twilight considered her options.

Option one was to continue what she was doing and when Trixie sprung her trap, fight to the best of her ability to win.

Option two was to stay where she was and wait until Trixie found her. This option came with the option of preparing her own traps and ambushes, but there was always the chance Trixie could get her while she was working.

So she was going to have to go with the third, and what she felt was the best option: modify and adapt the skills she had taught Trixie, and do the unpredictable.

Twilight glanced around her surroundings and levitated herself to a nearby tree branch. From up here she had a much better vantage point to observe her environment, and after a few minutes of searching she spotted Trixie hiding in some nearby bushes fixing up a cross-bow trap.

A smile formed on Twilight’s muzzle as she drew a small dart clean of any poisons or potions and used her magic to send it flying towards the blue and white clad assassin.

Trixie gave a startled yelp as something sharp pricked her side and then gave small groan as she recognized it as one of Twilight’s darts. With an angry glare set on her face, Trixie followed the dart’s flight path until she saw Twilight waving happily at her from a tree top.

Twilight teleported, and moments later, Trixie was tackled to the ground and being happily nuzzled to death.

“Oh, I missed you so much, Trixie! And I can’t wait to catch up with everything that’s been going on.” Twilight continued assaulting Trixie with her enthusiastic nuzzles. “I heard you went on a mission to the Crystal Empire. What’d you do there?”

“Twilight?” Trixie said.

“Did you have to kill anypony?”

“Twilight,” Trixie repeated.

“How’s Sunset Shimmer?”

“Twilight.”

“Did you ever end up telling Luna about your secret crush on her?”

“TWILIGHT!”

Twilight stopped nuzzling Trixie’s neck and blinked up at the mare in surprise. “Yes, Trixie?”

“Trixie kindly requests that you remove yourself from her personage, and she also wishes for you to remove your dart from her flank.”

Twilight promptly scampered away from Trixie with a confused and slightly hurt look. “D-did I do something wrong, Trixie?”

Trixie gave a frustrated huff, which turned to a pained squeak as she used her magic to pull the dart from her flank. “Trixie is just not in the mood for your antics! And she kindly reminds you that she doesn’t have a crush on her princess!”

Twilight snickered and began helping her fellow assassin to remove the now unnecessary traps. “If that were true, then how come I keep catching you staring at her flank? Or why you get so tongue-tied when you’re around her?”

Trixie’s cheeks burned crimson as she stared dejectedly at the ground. “Trixie is not saying that it’s true, Trixie is just pointing out that if she did have a crush on her princess, there is simply no way for it to work out.”

Twilight sidled up to Trixie and gave her a soft cuddle. “Don’t say that, Trixie. I’ve read about plenty of assassins throughout history who fell in love with their princess’s, most of the time their relationships worked out quite well. But it will only work out if you’re willing to let Luna know how you feel.”

Trixie met Twilight’s gaze and sniffled back a few tears. “B-but what if Luna doesn’t approve of Trixie’s feelings, then Luna will fire Trixie, and Trixie will…”

Twilight placed a hoof against Trixie’s mouth before she could complete her sentence and stared intently into her eyes. “Tell Luna how you feel, or she’ll eventually figure it out when she catches you staring at her moon-covered flanks.”

Trixie’s blush grew brighter and she looked away from Twilight. “T-Trixie does not stare at her amazing moon-covered flanks.”

Twilight giggled and booped Trixie on the nose. “If only I had a cookie every time you said that.”

“Trixie is going back to Luna now, and she suggests you get back to your own princess.”

Twilight’s horn glowed, and in a flash of violet light, they teleported to where the picnic blanket had been set up.

Luna gave Trixie a warm smile and wave, causing her to blush slightly and look away. Luna’s smile dropped and she glanced at Celestia, who gave her an encouraging nod.

“Trixie,” Luna said, standing up. “We wish to talk with thee in private before we continue on our journey.”

Without waiting for assassin’s reply, Luna turned and began walking further down the path, where their conversation wouldn’t be overheard by Twilight or Celestia.

Trixie and Twilight exchanged worried glances, and Twilight nudged her in the shoulder, encouraging Trixie to trot after Luna. Twilight had to resist giggling when she noticed Trixie’s gaze following the Night Princess’s swaying flanks.

“This is far enough.” Luna came to a sudden stop, and it was only Trixie’s cat-like reflexes that saved her from colliding with Luna’s full moon.

Trixie nervously gulped and forced herself to back further away from the hypnotic sight of Luna’s flanks before her Princess caught her staring. But there was no way for Trixie to hide her blushing face, no matter how hard she tried.

“Why doest thou look away from us, Trixie Lulamoon? Have we done something to offend thee in any way?”

Trixie’s mouth suddenly felt drier than desert sand and she forced herself to look up into Luna’s amazing light-blue eyes, she soon found herself so lost in them she had to look away lest she become a drooling mess. “Y-you haven’t done anything to offend Trixie.”

“Then why are thou acting like we are the plague? Or something else equally unpleasant and unworthy of thy attentions!”

Trixie gave a quiet whimper when she heard Luna say that. She couldn’t believe Luna would suggest, or even consider herself something unworthy of Trixie’s attention. She wanted nothing more than to hug and nuzzle her princess and give her all the loving attention Luna deserved, but she couldn’t risk Luna becoming annoyed or displeased with her.

“We have thought long and hard about this decision, Trixie Luluamoon, and we have decided that unless thou tells us why thou have been ignoring us for the past few moons, then we shall have no choice but to remove thee from thy position of royal assassin.”

Trixie whimpered louder at the possibility she would lose the job and the mare she was in love with. She gazed up at Luna with wide desperate eyes. “T-Trixie is sorry you feel as though she has been ignoring you. And Trixie wishes to assure you that was never her intentions.” Another whimper escaped from Trixie as she realized she’d have to finally admit the feelings of affection she had towards Luna. She wished with all her soul that this relationship between an assassin and her princess would be one of the ones that worked out. With a shaky breath, Trixie gestured for luna to move closer, and with one smooth and graceful motion she wrapped her forelegs around Luna’s neck bought her princess into a soft but sincere kiss.

Luna’s eyes widened as Trixie kissed her on the lips, and for several long moments her mind was a whirlwind of panic. Then everything clicked into place as she realized Trixie hadn’t been ignoring her to be spiteful, but because she was trying to conceal her feelings of affection. With that realization, the anxiety and worry she had been feeling for the past few months melted away with the warm fuzzy feeling growing in her heart.

Trixie went to move away, but Luna pulled her closer and deepened the kiss. Trixie gave a surprised squeak, which was quickly silenced as Luna poked her tongue into Trixie’s mouth and wrestled her tongue into submission. It had been far too long since she had a personal assassin for a consort, and Luna missed that type of special and closely intimate relationship. Several moments later, Luna’s eyes widened as Trixie began fighting back until it was her tongue that was dominating the kiss.

Trixie didn’t hesitate, nor did she take any quarter as her tongue invaded and explored every inch of Luna’s mouth, and after several more moments of pure bliss, Luna pulled back, a string of saliva connecting their muzzles. Trixie stared up in confusion at her Princess who was smiling down at her.

“S-so you’re not angry with Trixie?”

Luna giggled and pulled her assassin into tight hug, nuzzling her neck. “We are not angry with thee. In fact We are quite pleased and excited to explore a relationship with our assassin.” Luna planted another soft kiss on Trixie’s lips. “What took thee so long to finally admit thy true feelings for us?”

Trixie smiled and softly nuzzled Luna’s cheek. “Trixie guesses your fearless assassin is not as fearless as you think.”