Once upon a time, in the far away land of Ooo Caneighda, there lived a mare named Cadance. Well, actually, this shouldn't be past-tense. She still lives there. In fact, she keeps pretty busy running a city-state called the Crystal Empire.

Sure, crystal ponies are chill as fudge, and her husband is SMUH-O-KING hot, but it's not an easy job, being the head horse. You've got ancient despots returning from the grave, vicious drug traders, 11 months of winter, and so on. And while here in Equestria we believe in the "Magic of Friendship", sometimes friendship just won't cut it. That's where I come in. When Cadance has problems, I solve them.

My name is Princess, and I rock short skirts and cause explosions. I am equal parts fabulous and dangerous. I am the dress horse on a death course. I am awesome.

Somewhere out there is a drug mule bent on destroying lives and communities.
I'm gonna kick that ass.