Transparency: Q. Mint Jewelip

Early Warning marched across the parade field, head held high, eyes half-lidded in the stoic expression known to all experienced military forces the world over, keeping in perfect parade step as he nodded to his compatriots under the cover of his regulation armor and helmet.

The day had been an arduous one. It had started early, had an unexpected bit of conflict, and had resulted in a brief, though no less brutal, bit of combat with the enemy forces in the city. He had been forced to resort to the same violence his royalty so abhorred yet relied upon in times of great upheaval. It was a day he would not soon forget.

But, at last, he could go to the barracks, turn in his extra gear and weapons, and take a breather until he was needed again. The other guys could handle things for the night.

With a happy smile just gracing his lips, he nodded to the non-com at the barracks before trotting over to the armory to drop off his gear.

"'Ey. Seen any more of those little creepers since the wedding?" the guard at the check-in desk asked while logging Early's armor.

"Yheah. Little scuffle down by the port. Some straggler got it in his head to try and take out one of the airships, but the boys and I knocked some sense into him." He chuckled softly, "Okay... well, more like we piled on until the bug couldn't move... jeeze, the guy was fast... but we got him all chained up and the Captain was bringing him to isolation until the princess decides what to do with him."

The guard, eggshell white like approximately 1/3rd of all royal guards, blinked owlishly up at him, pausing in his writing as he stared. "Seriously? You're joking right? They came right back?"

Early's snort and a quick shake of his head did little to impress the guard. "Seriously. It's like they didn't learn their lesson or something." After a moment, he added, "You know... when you get off shift, might want to go look at 'im. He's... well... they're not quite as scary when they're all chained up."

After a moment more to stare incredulously at him, the guard shook his head and bent once more to the task of logging the barding, tramplers, and peytral before pulling the set inside and setting it upon a body-form. "Nah. I saw enough of the little demons when they hit us the first time." He looked up to Early Warning and frowned slightly. "You got a bit of a bruise there, forming on your shoulder. Might wanna get that checked out if it's bugging you."

Early raised an eyebrow before looking over to his side and frowning. "Guess he hit me harder than I thought."

"Yheah, well, better safe than sorry, you know. Those little things almost won, as I hear it."

Early nodded before turning to go. "Yheah. Hey, keep an eye out. If one got through, never know how many others the night watch might've missed last night."

"You too. Night Early."

Without another word, Early Warning trotted off to the barracks where he checked the duty roster, pulled off his helmet, and lay down on his cot. He wouldn't be on shift again for another 18 hours.

Another stallion strolled by, nodding as he tossed his helmet to a nearby bunk, and flopped down sweaty and exhausted.

"You look like crap buddy."

The stallion glanced up, rolled his eyes, and returned his face to the pillow before rolling over to look at Early again. "Yheah. Had a run-in with some freak changeling down by the park on West Bridle. Thing was a beast. Kept knocking our guys around like we were bowling pins."

Early raised an eyebrow. "Really? You guys too? We had one down by the sky dock. Think it was trying to bring down one of the ships."

The other stallion shook his head. "We can't keep doing this Early. They're eventually going to get by somepony and then there's going to be a whole mess we won't be able to fix."

Early nodded, but frowned. "Yheah. Not going to be good if that happens."

"WHEN that happens, Early, when. You know we can't go around blasting everypony just to 'make sure'... they'd eat us alive."

Early nodded again but shrugged. "Hey, it's for their own good though. If we don't do random checks, one will eventually get through."

The other stallion groaned and flopped back down to his cot. "I know... but jeeze... I mean... we.... they.... arrrrrg."

"Yheah. I know. Just take it one day at a time. 'S'what I do."

"Yheah, Early, I know. Sleep well bud."

"You too."

And with that, the stallion rolled over and Early reached for the small set of drawers by his cot. After a moment of searching, he pulled out a small green book and started flipping through it, skimming the pages as he looked for a blank page to add an entry to his diary....er...'journal.'

And after a minute, he tucked it back into the drawer.

He sighed deeply and smiled as he closed his eyes, a hoof idly running over the small engraving on the inside of the helmet: "If found, please return to Early Warning, Canterlot Royal Guard Barracks, Canterlot."

The name on the cot was identical.

-~oOo~-

Deep Thought rubbed his face as the mare before him seemed intent on repeating back his request for the fifth time.

It wasn't as if the concept of basic economics was new, nor the simple idea of granting a two week paid vacation a terribly difficult one to grasp... and yet, the mare seemed content to blink and stutter as he produced a satchel of bits quite clearly able to compensate her for her time.

"But... but, I mean... two weeks? And you'll pay me for my time AND sales?" the mare repeated... for the sixth time.

"Yes, Miss Jitters, as I am quite fond of your product, and my employer is rather enamored of its quality and elegant design, I have been requested to purchase a two week supply, plus wages, for an exclusivity option. In other words -" Deep breathed out, trying his best to reign in his slowly rising impatience.

"In other words, you want to buy my stock and pay me for two weeks time?" ... Deep ground his mental fangs... SEVEN.

"Yes, Miss Jitters, that is correct. So, without further repetition, are you interested in our business proposal?"

The caramel colored pegasus twitched a few times, her hoof sliding as if to reach for the bag of bits before snapping back. "Just like that? Just... 'We like your stuff, take some money? Two week vacation on us'? Just like that."

Deep felt his eye twitch. He felt it twitch enough that he was sure the twitchy mare could see a twitch that even her own twitching twitches couldn't hide. EIGHT... he screamed in his head... EIGHT TIMES SHE HAS TO REPEAT ME.

"Yes," Deep smiled diplomatically, "just like that. Bits on the table, product on the shelves, you could walk out that door in three minutes and come back in two weeks and you'd not lose a single bit. Free vacation. Dedicated and guaranteed sale of your product. Name recognition. And through it all, you'd be able to sit back and enjoy some hard earned, and might I add, very well deserved, relaxation time."

'So help me,' Deep thought to himself, 'if she repeats me one more time, I'm just going to knock her out, call the guard, and pay for her stay at a mental institution. No court in the world would convict me.'

"Just li-..... wow. Um..... Alright. Just let me grab my till and those bits." She smiled nervously. "It's just.... so sudden and .... "

"Yes, Miss Jitters, I know it is, but my employer has found your product to be exemplary and she can only imagine how much time and love you must put into it. It is her belief that a bit of reward is in order." He smiled devilishly, "And besides, if it's this good right now... can you imagine how much more amazing it will be when you're well rested?"

Leaning over, Deep Thought, disguised as a charcoal black stallion with an immaculately glossed mane and stunning amber eyes, lifted the mare's hoof to press his lips to it gently. "I cannot think of a single mare more deserving of the honor."

Blushing furiously, Miss Jittershake, sole proprietor of the Buzzbean cafe, looked around before flitting to her register, ejecting the till, and darting out of the shop... slowing only enough to snag the heavy satchel of bits.

Deep Thought sighed heavily. Thank the Hives that was over. That mare was wound so tightly, he could taste the lust in the air. With a smirk, he stood, walked to the door and flipped the sign to read "Closed."

'Three more stops," he thought to himself, 'only three more stops.'

-~oOo~

Early Warning rolled out his shoulders as he approached the gates. Long day or not, it was time to check in and make a report. No, it was not what he wanted to do. No, it was not what he was looking forward to doing. And No, he was not even remotely entertained by the thought of the teasing he was sure to get, but being a Guard meant that sometimes things had to be done that one didn't like. As such, he huffed out a breath, steeled himself, and marched through the gates fully expecting to get the ribbing of his life.

What he did not expect was to have the garrison master raise an eyebrow after checking in, then waive him through only be be suddenly smothered by the overwhelming form of the third response corp.

To say that he was surprised would have been an understatement.

To say that he should have known his day was only going to get worse would have been an equally obvious answer.

But to end up, pinned under the combined weight to no less than eight stallions in full armor, while in the garrison courtyard, after said stallions had been patrolling all day in the sun.... well, he just couldn't laugh it off anymore.

"Surrender peacefully and you will be unharmed, changeling!" the commander shouted from somewhere outside of the hot, sweaty, pile of metal and horse meat.

The smell alone would have made him surrender, but after everything else, all he could do was mutter "Oh, come on!"

-~oOo~-