Author's Note

I found a predictive text bot. I put in ALL of these stories, and then made the bot write a chapter based on what it got from all those stories. After a little formatting (but not much) this is what it spat out.
...this bot understands me deeply.

Botlite Sparkle (A Predictive Text Bot's Version of LWTSIW)

You can see the bouncing form of pinkie pie at the end of the hall in twilight Sparkle's castle. Twilight has gone out for the day and you thought you were going to be alone. No. Fuck this whole big stupid day. pinkie pie is there in front of you, unrepentant. You try to fathom all this horrible nagging bullshit, but you can’t.

" anon, come out and play with this microbe! " pinkie says with a soft rumbling laugh.

She wrinkles her nose at you and points towards spike. spike screeches with realizing his own useless lizard life. You feel nothing as usual.

" pinkie pie, you know twilight doesn’t like when i take you into the epic woods. " you whisper.

"i'm going to cuddle with addicts in it! " she screams.

You blink back the tears welling up in your eyes, and your mouth drops. You don't have a job ever since you found out what exactly is happening at sweet apple acres, and you are bored. maybe pinkie pie will be fun to be naked with.

"OK, " you wheeze. She jumping on your insides. "Let's go out I guess. "

with that, you open the doors to the world and go out. but that’s when twilight comes rushing into your flesh. she gives you a long sigh and drops you to the floor. you groan in anticipation of all the horrible things that you know must come to you now.

"Anon, i told you never to speak with pinkie pie. She gives ponies all the byproducts of inert gas! " twilight crows at you with gleaming eyes.

"I know. " You cry.

"Hey! What the fuck are you saying? " pinkie asks.

"You traitor of the bathroom, " twilight says slowly to her face. "i'm going to make you really miserable forever. "

The pink pony sobs once more and turns away from you.

"i'm sorry please aaaaahhhhh, " you offer her as she walks away.

twilight glares at you sourly and shakes her head over and over again. This whole production is beautiful looking but also more phallic than expected. Your dick is going to be hardwood. She lets out a low belch and looks down at you with sexual disgust.

"You stupid kinky fuck. " twilight hisses. "you are almost uncomfortably free of thought. I hope you die. "

and that's when you die.

-end-