The Witcher 3 -DLC: The Witcher of Equestria

Geralt let out an annoyed sigh.

"Look," he began "you're the heroes of this land, and this is my job."

"But Geralt-" Twilight spoke

"Don't 'But' me, Twilight. You and your friends stay out of my business, and, truth be told, most of my friends will attack you on sight. I don't want to risk it, especially with someone as powerful as Celestia and Luna." He got up and took the map away.

"Geralt! Please, we want to help!"

"You really want to help?" she nodded "My friend and I should be back soon. You have this castle; have some rooms ready." He walked out.

"...He seems nice." Spike commented dryly.

"Please, Spike," Twilight replied "Geralt's... different."

Geralt walked and followed the map Celestia gave him, going to a place called "Froggy Bottom Bog". As he walked, he couldn't help but see the town, despite what happened, was peaceful. Foals ran around without a care, families stood together as one, young adults wer doing whatever they wanted to do, everything... it was perfect. Though Geralt didn't want to do it, but he actually wanted to live here.

This place... it's too perfect. How can any of this be real!? The technology is way too advanced, and it's working alongside magic!? Fuck, maybe I should get some evidence of this land and show those magic-hating bastards that this is the best way of the future, though I may want to get rid of all these-

"Geralt!" The voice Applebloom quipped.

"Oh great." Geralt commented to himself. Walking around him were Applebloom and her friends.

"Geralt! Remember me? It's Applebloom!"

"I do. Shouldn't you all be home?"

"Mah big sis and brother have everything under control."

"My big sister is angry because somepony kept screaming on the train and wants to be alone." The unicorn, Sweetie Belle, spoke.

"And I'm bored." The pegasus simply added.

"...Who are you?" Geralt asked "I know she's Applebloom and the other's Sweetie Belle, but what's your name?"

"Oh! Name's Scootaloo!"

"Scootaloo?" Sounds very childish.

"Yep! Honorary Cutie Mark crusader like my friends!"

"...Cutie Mark Crusaders? What, you fight the local bullies?"

"Uh, no." Applebloom answered "We're trying to find our Cutie marks."

"Cutie Marks?"

"Yeah, the thing on your flank." Sweeite Belle replied, poking at the wolf mark on Geralt's flank. "You had this for your life, but you don't know what it means?"

"I'm new here."

"What does your mark mean?" Scootaloo asked, hopping onto Geralt's back. Surprisingly, she was light. "It looks so cool!"

"Ah think it has something to do with his 'Witcher' thing." Applebloom commented "That's it, right?"

"... I think so." Geralt replied, looking at his flank now. "I've trained hard to be a Witcher since childhood, and I'm-"

"CUTIE MARK CRUSADERS WITCHERS!!!" The three yelled in unison, making Geralt jump back. He was quickly tackled by the three fillies.

"Can you teach us how to be Witchers, Geralt!?" Applebloom asked excitedly

"We promise we'll listen!" Sweetie Belle added

"We'll be the best students ever!" Scootaloo finished. Geralt quickly, but gently, pushed them all off before standing back up.

"No." He stated bluntly, turning and walking away. The three ran after him.

"Why!?" Applebloom whined "We'll listen!"

"It's too dangerous."

"We laugh at danger!" Scootaloo added. Geralt stopped and turned to the filly, who stopped and stared back, now worried looking.

"You have a high chance pf dying. I was one of the lucky ones who survived my training. In fact, I only had a three in ten chance of surviving. Think you can survive that?" She backed up in fear.

"N-no, sir."

"Good. And even if you did look like you could survive this, I can't teach."

"Why not?" Sweetie Belle asked

"Not only would it mean seeing you three possibly pass away, but it would take years for you to become full Witchers, and even then, I do not have any of the ingredients the professors used, and I doubt they'll have all the plants I need around here. Go home, you three. I'm sure you'll have a wonderful life, especially without the need to be like me." And, just like that, he walked off. The three stared at each other.

"...Ya'll think he was bluffing?" Applebloom asked

"With a stare like that, I don't think so." Scootaloo shivered.

"Let's go back to the clubhouse." Sweetie Belle spoke, her head and ears down as she lead the group.

After some walking, and no distractions, Geralt found himself at Froggy Bottom Bog. All around him was a swamp; mud squished around his hooves, mosquitoes flew around & bit him, various bubbling was heard as well as the croaking of frogs, and the place... it reeked, bad. The Witcher walked around the place, looking around, guessing on who of his allies were here, and what did they change to. Then he heard a twig behind snap behind to his right. He quickly drew his sword out and turned around.

"Show yourself!" He ordered.

"Whoa, dude," a relaxed woman's voice spoke. "Are you like, a lumberjack or something?"

"...No. Show yourself!" From right behind one of the trees was a green earth pony mare, but her mane & taile had red stripes and both looked like tentacles. Noticable, her eyebrows were huge, and she wore what was a yellow bandanna with white flowers. "Who are you?"

"'Sup, name's Tree Hugger."

"...Tree Hugger?" I swear, these names are getting ridiculous with every second!

"Yeah man, name's Tree Hugger, dude."

"What are you doing here, Tree Hugger?"

"I'm just checking out the frogs here, man. These croaks here really enjoy it here, man. Especially that other dudette here."

"Wait! Someone's here with you?"

"Not really, man. She came in yesterday, confused on what happened, and had a hard time walking."

"What's her name?"

"...Oh man, what is it? I totally forgot."

"Who are you talking to?" A recognizable woman's voice spoke.

"Keira." Geralt acknowledged. Keira stood right next to Tree Hugger. Geralt recognized her dress anywhere, and the white hair she has was complimented by her tail. She was an Earth Pony, like Tree Hugger, but had a light brown coat, and her 'cutiemark' was a seedling.

"Geralt!? Is that you!?"

"Yeah. Glad to see that I wasn't the only one who changed."

"My God! You've... you're quite... how shall we say...-"

"Adorable?"

"I was going to say different, but I guess that works."

"You know this dude?" Tree Hugger asked

"Yes, Tree Hugger. This is my friend, Geralt."

"Geralt of Rivia." He corrected, walking to them. "And you've been with her?"

"Yes, Geralt. Tree Hugger is actually pretty nice and knows a lot about plants like me, though more, since she's lived here."

"She lives in this swamp?"

"Only for a while, man." The strange mare replied "I'm just here to look after the frogs and find out what's causing their numbers to fall."

"Perhaps the alligators."

"Very few alligators live here. It's something else."

"Yeah... I don't know about you, but we have more important things than-" The ground shook with a loud rumble.

"What was that!?" Keira asked.

"I think it's what's hurting the frogs." Tree Hugger replied, pulling out and eating some plant. Geralt felt the place turn cold, the sound almost stopping with the exception of a loud hiss, and a shadow loomed over him. Keira noticeably froze.

"Geralt. Don't... run." Geralt turned around to see the undebelly of a dragon-like beast. He looked up to see 4, long necks, each ending with a large snake-like head.

A Hydra!? Shit, better use the silver sword The Hydra let out a loud roar, all of it's heads lunging at Geralt, mouths wide open with drool falling! Gerat quickly jumped out of the way, running to Keira and Tree Hugger, pulling out his Silver sword.

"Whoa! A Hydra!" Tree Hugger spoke, seemingly unfazed and idiotic.

"Know how to use your magic, Keira?"

"Uh, not really." Keira replied "I'm barely getting use to this body."

"You better learn quick!" The Hydra lunged it's heads again. The Witcher and Sorceress jumped away, landing in the murky swamp below, but looked up to see Tree Hugger walking casually.

"Tree Hugger! What are you doing!? Run!!!"

"It's cool, man." she spoke "I already have a plan." Geralt ran and grabbed Tree Hugger before the Hydra could swallow her.

"Quit being an idiot and run!" He barked

"Nah man, all we need is to calm him down and lead him to a safe place."

"What we need to do is kill it!" They ran away from the Hydra, who began to chase them down.

"Geralt," Keira spoke "as much as I love seeing you kill monsters, I think she's right."

"What!?"

"Believe it or not, she saved me from some wildlife that were too unfamiliar to me, namely those Timberwolves with her... sonic bliss."

"Are you kidding me!?" They both turned a corner and landed in a corner of some ruined building. "Are you FUCKING KIDDING ME!?" He turned around and prepared his sword, the Hydra turning to them. Come on, Geralt! Remember: Silver will keep a head off and not regrow one. Perhaps Keira can help me on this? Or... I doubt it, but perhaps this idiot can help. Think, Geralt, Think!

Fight the Hydra.

A little help, Keira?

What's your plan, Tree Hugger