The Life and Times of a Substitue Teacher

Chapter 9: Sleep Deprived and Stupid

"Morning Mr. Star!" the class chimed as you walked into the school house. You mumbled in response, too tired to actually say good morning to the class.

"Has Scootaloo been keeping you up Mr. Star?" Diamond Tiara said as you flopped into your chair.

"Shut it Tiara" you said in response to her attempt to cause another incident. Thankfully she realized that you were not to be annoyed right now, and she sat back down, not saying anything for the rest of the day. Just as you sent the kids out for their morning break you noticed a pony that was too big to be in school, but your sleepy mind couldn't figure out who it was until they got closer.

"Cheerilee" you said while falling into the teacher's chair.

"Are you okay, you seem very tired" she said in a motherly voice.

"Well, apparently princess Luna has fallen for me, and decided that she would stay at my place for now since I can't go to Canterlot" you mumbled.

"Well that's has got to be tough, her being nocturnal and all," Cheerilee said as she leaned down to one of the drawers, "Sorry if this bothers you, I just need to grab something out of here"

Her apologies fell on deaf ears, and you had managed to pass out while leaning against the back of the chair. She didn't pay any attention to it and continued to search though the drawers, but as if fate had a very cruel sense of humor, a certain pink filly happened to look in from the window. From Diamond Tiara's vantage point you were receiving some special treatment from Cheerilee, and she was going to use this against you. It also didn't help her ideas when you were noticeably more awake after the break had ended.

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"See you tomorrow Mr. Star!" the class yelled as they all ran out the door to go play. You quickly began to pack your things, knowing that if you were fast, you could get home in time to sleep before Luna woke up, and then you wouldn't be as tired tomorrow. Just as you were leaving you heard a loud scream and suddenly the sky filled with dark clouds, thunder and lightening occasionally making appearances. Before you could move you figured out who the scream had come from.

"SILVER! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID WITH CHEERILEE THIS INSTANCE!" Luna said in the Royal Canterlot Voice as she flew towards you.

"Nothing your highness" you responded while attempting to get out of her sight.

"That's not what Diamond Tiara said!" Luna said, now talking normal again, "She said she saw Cheerilee giving you a..."

"A what?"

"A blowjob!"

"WHAT?!" you shouted in surprise, almost matching the volume of the Royal Canterlot Voice.

Luna quickly explained what she had heard from the little filly, and you quickly told your side of the story. Thankfully you have a special spell that allows you to magically pull up anything that happened in the classroom, which you used to find out if they were passing notes or cheating on tests most of the time. You quickly brought up the break, and showed Luna that you had just fallen asleep, and that Cheerilee was grabbing a note out of the desk.

"Oh, dear Celestia," Luna said while hugging you, "I'm so sorry, I just couldn't bear to hear that you could be cheating on me!"

"We're dating?" you replied stupidly.

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"So, anyone want to help explain this to me?" you asked Big Mac and Doctor Whooves, who were with you in Sweet Apple Acres' cellar.

"Well, it would appear as though Luna believes the relationship is further along than it is, and she had thought that you felt the same way" Whooves answered.

"I get that part, but how could she have thought it was in that stage already?"

"Maybe it's because you weren't opposed to her staying at your house?" Big Mac said while grabbing mugs from a nearby shelf.

"What was I supposed to do? Say no?" you said while getting yourself some of Big Mac's special cider, "You can't just say no to one of the princesses!"

"True, but you could have given her a good reason to not stay at your place" Whooves said as he got up to get himself some cider.

"I tried that, but she still didn't leave!"

"What did you say to her?"

"That I was teaching and that having a nocturnal princess stay at my house would cause me to lose sleep, which meant I wouldn't teach as well as I could"

"She still stayed after that?" Big Mac asked.

"Eeyup" you responded, already a bit buzzed from the special cider.

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"Hi Mr. Star!" Applebloom said as you stumbled out of the cellar, "What are you doing here?"

"That's Doctor Professor Star to you!" you said, your speech heavily slurred.

"What?"

"Nevermind!" you started to stumble your way back towards Ponyville, "Oh, by the way, your brother and Whooves are still down there" Applebloom didn't need to ask what the three of you had been doing down there, seeing as it was fairly obvious just from the state you were in. You managed to start running for all of five minutes before the dizziness kicked in, and you went careening into a nearby ditch. Rather than trying to get up you just sat there, happily drunk, and stared up at the night sky, ad you started to fall asleep...

Suddenly you felt yourself get picked up, and when you looked to figure out who it was you nearly became sober instantly. It was Luna. Unluckily for you, you didn't actually get fully sober, and before you knew it you were saying stupid things like, "Hey beautiful" and "Can I have you as a bedtime snack?"

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"Silver wake up!"

"Five more minutes..."

"SILVER!"

"AH! I'm awake, I'm awake!" you shouted groggily as you looked around, "Oh, hi Scootaloo"

"Silver, what are you still doing in bed? You have to get ready for school!" Scootaloo said as she climbed off your bed, seeing as she had to jump on you so you would wake up.

"Sorry, just had a rough night"

"Yeah, so did she" Scootaloo said as she went out the door. You turned your head and saw Luna next to you, sound asleep. You immediately started to regret drinking last night, but you hoped that what you were thinking happened, didn't actually happen, because if it did...

"Morning dear" Luna said, causing you to jump, "Sleep well? I know I did"

"Um, Luna, what did we do last night?" you asked shyly after recovering from the scare she gave you.

"We did what all couples do at night" Luna replied calmly, "We got into bed, and then when nuzzled each other, and then..." Her face suddenly turned almost as red as Big Mac's. It would have been cute on different circumstances, but right now it only brought you fear.

"What exactly did we do?" you asked with fear in your voice

"Well..." she said as she leaned towards you, giggling ever so slightly.

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"Good morning Mr. Star!" the class chimed as you entered the room. Again you mumbled something resembling good morning to them, and sat down in the teacher's chair. Today was not the right day to be hung over and tired, but both were consequences of your actions. After Luna told you what you and her had done the night before you felt extremely tired, since you had learned that most of your night was spent awake doing things with her.

"So Mr. Star, how was the princess?" Tiara asked coyly.

"Tiara I swear to Celestia if you keep trying shit like this I'm going to kick you out" you responded, clearly not in the mood for her shenanigans. Again she quickly sat down, but just before you could start teaching two stallions entered the classroom, Big Mac and Doctor Whooves.

"Silver, you need to come with us right now!" Whooves ordered, and when you shook your head Big Mac charged at you, and knocked you out. You came to just as they were letting all the kids out of school, along with explaining to Cheerilee why they just knocked out her substitute teacher.

"What the fuck was that for?" you asked while rubbing your chin.

"Because, you really need to come with us, and we didn't have time for you to be stubborn about it" Whooves answered.

"What he said, but really, you need to come with us" Big Mac continued.

"I'm coming too!" Cheerilee said suddenly, only to be echoed by Scootaloo, who had apparently stayed behind to figure out what was going on. No pony gave them a reason to not come, so they ended up following Big Mac and Whooves with you. Within minutes it was fairly obvious why they had been so serious about you coming with them.

The closer to town the five of you got, the louder the cheering got, and eventually party streamers had begun to appear in the trees. When you all arrived in Ponyville you saw what the party was about. Luna had announced that she was getting married to somepony from Ponyville, and you knew who the (un)lucky stallion was. You were about to make a run for it when Luna appeared in front of you.

"Hello dear!" she said as she hugged you, "Look at the wonderful party Pinkie is throwing for us!"

You felt a small nudge in your ribs, and you turned to face the four ponies that had been with you, and after a minute or so Whooves asked the question that was on everypony's mind...

"Exactly how drunk did you get last night?"

So many breaks! Yeah, so sorry for the fragmented style here, it's just meant to show that time had passed between each "scene"