Shitty IRC Clopfics

"Next!" Oblivion shouted, annoyed that he was stuck here covering for his coworker, who had just decided that he wanted to take time off to hang around with her coltfriend. Bitch.

Once again the Ponyville Department of Horse Vehicles was full of ponies renewing their licenses. He hated this job. Hated it! Taking the clipboard he read the next name on the list. "Gnomey. Gnomey?" Has asked himself, that was a weird pony name.

A small pony walked up to him. "Hi," he said, looking up and beaming a broad smile, "I'm Gnomey."

Oblivion did a double-take. The pony was just slightly bigger than a colt! Yet he could tell that this 'colt' was not a colt at all, but rather a young stallion. A handsome young stallion, at that. His blue coat matched his bright eyes hidden under a greenish luscious mane. These miniature ponies weren't common way out here in this town. Usually they congregate in big cities like Canterlot and Manehattan.

"Uh... hi. So, you're here to get a new license?" Oblivion asked.

"Oh yes," Gnomey replied, clopping his little hooves together excitedly, "I've already passed the written, now I'm ready for the practical!"

Oblivion laughed to himself. Despite the apparent age of this stallion, he certainly acted like half his age.

"My name is Oblivion and I will be your tester."

"Obli?"

That made the black Unicorn chuckle, "Fine, you may call me Obli. Please, this way." He gestured towards a large double door that led to the back of the DHV.

There were only three carts there. Gnomey stood in front of the front-most one ready for his first test drive, eager to get started. Oblivion went around to the other side and levitated a clipboard and quill to his face.

"Ready when you are."

Oblivion watched as the little Earth pony strapped himself in; the harness carefully placed over the the body. The size of this particular cart seemed a little too big for Gnomey. His girth could barely accommodate the trace. A part of Oblivion wanted to stop the test right then, this wasn't safe. If Gnomey needed to swerve out of the way, there would be no way he would be able to with the harness attached the way it was. Still, slow turns should be fine.

"How am I doing so far?" Gnomey asked, pulling the emergency brake down gently and adjusting his rear view mirrors.

"Just fine." Oblivion smiled, "Okay, let's go for a little drive around town, shall we?"

The blue Earth pony squeed in delight, "It'll be like a date!"

Oblivion couldn't help but blush at that, but he didn't complain.

The first half of the drive was easy. Gnomey signaled every turn, looked both ways, was alert and focused. Not bad for a guy who could barely turn the cart he was driving.

"Very well done, Gnomey. Let's head back to the DHV and get that license for you." Oblivion smiled.

"Aw. Already? Can't we just... take a little detour?"

Once again, Oblivion couldn't deny the feeling of blood rushing to his cheeks. That made Gnomey giggle. Neither of them noticed a rabbit hopping across the road in front of them until it was too late. Instinctively, Gnomey pulled the cart to the left, but he wasn't tall enough. Without thinking twice, Oblivion reached over and pulled the harness, sending the two of them into a ditch with a loud crash.

"A-are you okay, Obli?" Gnomey asked.

"Fine. Just fine. Let me see if I can get out..." Oblivion tried to move, but he was stuck. Completely. The only thing he could move was his flank up and down. Everything else was stuck. The shaft had extended across the ditch, protecting them from the rear half of the cart, which had flipped over and fallen on top of them, covering them up like a small tent. If it hadn't been for that, they might have been crushed. Oblivion's head was stuck, his horn was jumped into the rear of the cart where the covering for the passengers had been lowered on such a lovely day, the harness had wrapped around his neck preventing him from being able to move it downwards. His legs were also caught on something. He was completely immobile, except for his waist. "I'm stuck."

"Let me try." Gnomey shuffled himself backwards.

The little Earth pony moved backwards, but he was pressing up against something. He wiggled his flank trying to get whatever it was to move out of the way.

"S-s-s-stop..." Oblivion's voice squeaked, "Stop, please..."

"I think I can get out. Whatever this is feels like it's move-" Gnomey's voice was cut short as he felt something poke his behind. "Mmm. What's that?" He asked coyly, gently bumping against it, "What is that?"

"Me." Oblivion was glad he couldn't see the smaller stallion under him. His face was surely scarlet. "Please stop. You're rubbing against me."

"Ooh. So, is this what I think it is?" Gnomey pressed up against Oblivion, wiggling gently, brushing his member with the top of this tail.

Oblivion muttered something, "Pl-please!"

"Please what? Stop? Continue? Do something... more?" Gnomey cooed, pushing his tail to the side and letting Oblivion's member run across his anus for a second.

The Unicorn let out a gasp of surprise. That made Gnomey giggle.

"So? Please stop, continue... or do you want more?"

Oblivion muttered something under his breath.

"Sorry, I didn't hear that. Louder, please."

"I said... mrrh..."

"Hm? Speak up, Obli."

"I said... more... please."

Gnomey pushed his tail to the side, allowing the tip of Oblivion's penis rub against his hole. He felt the pre-cum moisten his anus as he expertly rubbed the tip, all the while Oblivion gasping at each pass. Everytime he moved forward out of instinct, Gnomey would move forwards just out of reach, and each time he'd let out a grunt of frustration.

"No need to rush, Obli," the young Earth pony giggled, "plus I think you might be too big for little ol' me."

It was clear that Gnomey was enjoying this way too much, teasing the Unicorn the way he did. But the more he teased, the more frustrated Oblivion got. He started struggling against the harnesses, trying to latch onto the little stallion between his legs, to grab him, to hold him, to thrust himself into him with all his might! He was getting desperate.

And little Gnomey was enjoying every minute of it, feeling his own erection under him grow.

"Need. That. Body. Now!" Oblivion growled.

Fear and excitement surged through Gnomey as he saw Oblivion struggle against the harness, trying to get it off him. His legs closing in on him.

"Come and get me. Fuck me hard. Fuck me now!" Gnomey begged, still keeping just out of Oblivion's reach.

"Oh, I'll fuck you. I'm going to fuck you hard!" Oblivion roared.

With one last pull, Oblivion's forehooves broke free from his restraints and he instantly seized Gnomey by his haunches and pulled him down towards his member. With the amount of pre-cum lubbing his anus, Oblivion slipped in and he gasped as he felt the tightness of the Earth pony clench around him.

Oblivion was true to his word, and he did fuck Gnomey hard.

"More!" Gnomey begged, his head on the ground as he felt Oblivion slide deep inside him again, his body loving every inch of his rough invasion.

"I'm... I'm going to cum!" Oblivion shouted.

"Cum, cum, cum inside me!"

Oblivion shouted in ecstasy as he felt his balls empty into the little Earth pony.

"That... was... great..." Oblivion panted, resting his flank on the pony under him.

Just then he felt the cart lift off his head, and he stared in shock as a large group of ponies stood around them. It was a large crew of fireponies that had come to help them, and they were clearly not expecting what they saw.

"Oh. Shit."

Gnomey nuzzled Oblivion's chest and pulled his head down towards him, "So... did I pass?"

"Uh... yeah... you did."

Gnomey frowned, "Aw. Now I'll never get to see you again."

"That's not true." Oblivion put his hoof on Gnomey's cheek, lifting it up and giving him a passionate kiss, "We could always go on a nice drive together... maybe without the crashing."

"I'd like that, Obli. I'd like that very much."