Said the Spider to the Horse Flies

Part 1-

FLOP! The loudest sound had made its way out of Cheerilee’s humble schoolhouse at long last. Where ever she lied that dark dusk-hour, there was now just that much more relief in Ms. Cheerilee’s system after a hint of chaos was added to her day, whether she’d actually heard it or not. Almost like a tradition that could be lived on even in the mind even during a day off like that one. With that being said, Cheerilee dozed off after several sleepless hours of that one teeny feeling of forgetting something and that must’ve been it. Magenta-toned eyelids now shut tight; she dozed off into Pony dreamland, satisfied as an Earthworm in a spacesuit, without another worry in the world.

But something was wrong. Cheerilee didn’t realize it in the half conscious state she was in, but the schoolhouse had been broken into earlier that PD Day, and that loud slap against what sounded like Pony-Pavement wasn’t exactly the sound of the Breaking and Entry beginning. It was the sound of filly-flesh hitting a classroom floor, leaving large, visible cracks within the radius of where the filly itself landed. After a moment of kissing cracked flooring, the child finally raised her snout off the ground and did what any knowledgeable filly would do: Curse it on everyone else, of course! Even if they weren’t even there.

“Gaww…” Yelled Diamond Tiara, spitting out the crunched up pieces of flooring from her mouth.

“Stupid teacher, leaving her stapler right in my desk-pacing path. I mean, what teacher in the right mind puts a Stapler right in the middle of her desk anyway? Who is she protecting it from?”

Diamond Tiara began to regain her footing, successfully finding a nice bi-pedal pose while still mumbling out assorted insults to Ponies she hadn’t even seen in several days since the 3 Day weekend had began the previous Friday.
“It’s not like Ms. Cheerilee has much to hide in that desk anyway. Everyone already knew about that Photo shoot.” Diamond Tiara pulled out a stack of photos from her pocket, as if she was showing them to someone, even though the classroom was as empty as the pictures were revealing.

“At least THESE ones are uncensored. Props to Feather Weight for thes-“

Wait, WHAT?

She stopped herself midsentence after she realized what foul words were coming out of her snout. Crumpling up the photos until they combusted at the expense of her frustration, she flopped down into the desk where she’d always sat during school hours. She didn’t know why exactly this spot was the one she chose. Was it because from there she could get a nice view of Applebloom’s test for cheating? Maybe it was because it was close enough to the front so that she could both etch down notes from the old Chalkboard AND get a nice view of Cheerilee so that the threatening drawings of her had just that much more detail? Or maybe it was because it was the best place to pluck Dinky Doo’s feathers without anyone knowing the wiser. Not even she truly knew, but at a moment like that, it didn’t matter much anyway, besides the fact that she knew her best servant: Silver Spoon had a spot right next to her, for all her Fashion and Complimentary needs. But that was just during school hours, and on a night like this one, the only thing that was there to warm Tiara’s hoarse soul was the lone ray of Luna’s light beaming unto one of the classroom’s desks. Feather Weight’s Desk.

That name! That annoying, unfitting, puny excuse for a name was the only thing that was able to flash through Diamond Tiara’s mind that Monday Midnight. As she shifted positions on her desk as the spots she lied on Warmed up, all she could think of was how much him and the rest of this mutiny of a class ruined whatever chance at power she had not even a month before as the Editor in Chief of the School paper. Oh the stories she’d gotten, oh the pain that other Ponies were feeling, and all because of what she, and to a lesser extent her crew, had conjured up. It was even more sweet and juicy than any of the Apples that Tiara had ever dreamed of eating. But after what Applebloom and all her darling little pest friends had done after things were just getting good all but tore out the soul from her body, almost like they were beating a horse before it was even dead. All the work she’d gone to make everyone else does anything and everything against their will, for nothing. Especially all those photos, the best parts that weren’t even published, going to waste inside of the then-aware Ms. Cheerilee’s hidden Shredder from inside her desk. A teacher is always prepared, but still, that was just too much for Diamond to watch get ground up. Just imagining her reaction, Tiara couldn’t even begin to picture how Feather Weight was feeling after the spectacle of watching all his hard earned Pon-aroid Paper go to waste right in front of him

“Dyaghh… Feather Weight, GET OUTTA MY HEAD ALREADY.” Tiara smacked her head against the table as she called out.

But that was just it. Feather Weight’s devastation was nowhere in sight. As dumbfounding as it was to Tiara, the confusing was short lived, after she quickly found out that Feather Weight, himself, had went ahead and joined up with… THEM; the Stupid little “Cutie Mark Crusaders” and their band of Traitors. Just thinking of the trio’s names in a Mock-y voice was insulting to Tiara. Everything she’d let them have in her business: Gabby Gums Articles, Full Printer Privileges, even free Juice from old Berry Punch’s Winery, just to be taken down with them in their time of Media based demise. It had been 4 weeks since then, and now every night Tiara just found herself getting fewer and fewer hours of rest during the night, the memories of that one event playing back and forth in her head to the point of feeling like her head was stuffed with pillows that only needed but one more feather to explode. Aware of the speeding mind sights, Tiara felt as though they weren’t the causes of her insomnia. Carrying the weight of denial on her spa-smooth back, Tiara decided that she’d go to the only other place in Pony Ville that mattered at one point beside her house: The School. The very thought of staying there, however, made a Colgate-cool chill roll up her spine as fast as the Blue Pony her self’s toothpaste rubbed against her bristles.

Uhhuhuhuh… Desperate times call for desperate measures. Especially ones where you DO measure on Math day Mondays.

At least the desks were cooler than her bed, with their smooth, yet easily familiar room temperature surfaces. Almost as though their textures were like a Second bed to every pony who attended the class, including Diamond Tiara; Comfortable, yet escapeable. They ARE wood desks after all. Brown, wood desks. Almost like the colour of a Certain Mane. Feather Weight’s Mane.

Tiara barely noticed this time around. Feather Weight’s presence in her mind was the only thing that seemed to help her relax against the cold desktop’s dimly lit plane. Soon, the intensity of the relaxation began to pile up, and for the first time in what seemed like Celestia’s life time, Tiara was actually beginning to tucker out, at least a little bit. After all, with a Sleepless record like 4 Weeks, she figured she’s at least hold out as long as she could. Laying her head against the desk as carefully as Dinky Doo’s Mom had delivered her Birthday Muffins, Tiara felt as though she was about to doze off. No, not yet. Not without putting up a fight first, like the Real Mare she was hoping to be.

“Enough is enough, DT.” She complained to herself out loud.

“Feather’s just another Random Raghead like the rest of them. Hay, he even went out of his way to join the others in the end, you shouldn’t have jerks like him on your mind at all!” Tiara shifted the position of her head, facing away from the window as if there was someone looking at her.

D’oh... I really couldn’t agree more, but you have to admit there’s something about Jerks like him that just, makes you think a whole lot more than you need to. Hay, you’re thinking about him right now, I can feel it.

Her head darted back to its starting pose, aggravated.

“Pfft… Maybe about punching him, Hoof first. Besides, it’s not worth it to befriend betrayers, DT. If he doesn’t wanna waste his time with me, I’m not gonna waste my time with him.”

I don’t know about THAT. Was he wasting time when he documented EVERYTHING for you? What about all that time he ‘wasted’ by listening to your every word on the job? Were those all wastes of time? Great examples of direction on our end, sure, but not time wasters!

“Hmm… well, maybe there was SOME fun in it...” She recalled back to all the good times in those few days on the job. So many laughs, so many Ponies left in the dust, and all because of team work. But then it all ended.

“…Notice the was! Feather Weight wasn’t even affected by the grating of his papers, as if there were nothing to him. He just went back to taking public- pictures after I was done with him. He didn’t even care… all he cares about is getting pictures of that yellow bellied Spider Mane!”

It was true. The only thing that Diamond Tiara hated more than seeing Ponies use her, and her duties for the Fun of it, was the sight of the newfound Local hero: The Spectacular Spider Mane, whom began appearing shortly after Pony Ville’s clashing with the dreaded Tumblr-verse, only to save the day. The web headed Whiner seemed to be the only thing that Bone-Thin Feather Weight paid attention to ever since, and pay attention he did. Absences from school, just to see the Spider. Absences from Holiday celebrations, just to see the spider. Even times when as soon as somepony began to cry out for help in the distance, he up and left, saying nothing as he plunged himself out of his desk and out the door, just to see the Spider, As if he knew that he’d be there every time. And sure enough, he was, every time. Tiara herself, while dumbfounded, never really understood why or how an affixation with a costumed creep like Spider Mane lead Feather Weight to him every chance there was. For all she knew, Feather Weight WAS Spider Mane.

“Fshh.” Tiara giggled to herself at the very idea.

“That Tan Twig? He could probably even hold his Dinky Camera lenses, let alone that web-stuff.”

Uncontrollably, Tiara’s head shifted, as if her mind was taking over.

You never know, DT. Feather can be a VERY secretive little foal, I mean, just look at his report card- Oh wait, you can’t. He’s never shown anyone, so no one, not even you would be able to judge whether he becomes the next Doctor Whooves, or the next Ditzy Doo.

“First off, it’s DERPY HOOVES, and that’s as canon as Princess Celestia is a perv.... What ever Floats you Brainboat though... Second, your point?”

You know, there might be more to him than you think, other than his slender legs, and his vigorously styled Mane, and his amazing camera skills and his cutey-wootey little buck tooth and plot and his-

Tiara bashed her hoof against the table, blushing angrily at the thoughts of her own mind.

…

MY POINT IS, maybe there’s more to that twig than meets the eye. Who knows? Maybe your seeing things. Maybe your eyes just haven’t been treated right lately. I bet you don’t even remember the last time you treated them to one of Miss Pinkie’s cupcakes, do you?

“PINKIE’S CUPCAKES?!?” Tiara wasn’t exactly over her thoughts from earlier.

“It might just be the after thoughts of Twilight Sparkle’s encounter with the Tumblr-verse, BUT… PINKIE’S CUPCAKES, I MEAN WH- Why… How would you even thin- just… DUGHHHH. This is all just too much. My mind acting like the slab of Pony Jerky she is, flashbacks to the Dark Tumblr Times, and new, weird thoughts about Feather Weight!”

That make your Heart thump. Listen! Buh-buh-Buuh-Buh. BU-BU-BUUH-BUH! Hey Hey Hey! You have a CRUSH.

That last tease. It was it.

Tiara, now silent, lifted herself out of the desk seat in the calmest fashion her boiling blood could carry. A hearty twitch in her eye, Tiara marched her filly body in the direction of the door which she’d already broken into. A wiggle in her step, she turned around just back to the desk as if she’d forgotten something. Something important, even though the same Evil Smile that had emerged on her face moments ago was still intact. She uttered through her teeth as she twistedly stared at the empty table.

“Whoops. Almost forgot…"

Her desk flew through the door with a godly force that would rival that of Jes-orse. As it’s wooden shards flew into the night sky, landing somewhere in the dim spots where Diamond Tiara now marched in the grass, Tiara’s distorted facial expression decided to settle itself in, and Tiara was more than happy to have it with her. Town was only moments away, even at walking distance as Tiara had plainly seen. Someone in Pony Ville could help. Someone had the power to rid the World of Spider Mane once and for all. Feather Weight was going to be all hers. Tiara stood up on her hind legs, and began to inch her way into town as devastating as she could make it look at an after Midnight hour, knowing just who to ask.

“To the Library.” She grinned.