Author's Note
A/N: Slight Warning: Trigger Warning, Depression, attempted suicide, hurts, stuff like that~
Chapter 1- Fall
Lightning Dust's wings curled the early twilight air underneath them, shaping the currents into wonderful waves of air as she accelerated upward at a rate near nopony else could match, gravity seeming to have no hold on her as we continued upward at a near vertical angle.
The land below shrunk into a pale green blob below her as she burst through cloud after cloud, the moisture sticking to her coat but drying after only a few seconds in her speed, mane blown back, ears against her head, tail streaming as a glow of teal and jagged yellow lightning began to arc out behind her. The sun was nearly set, the moon rising as she climbed higher into the deep indigo of the night sky, not bothered by the sudden cool of the thin air, her eyes moving toward the dancing array of stars and cosmic light above her- so close it looked as if she could reach out and her hoof would be flecked with dust and light.
She reached the apex of her climb and arched back, her head and muzzle tilted upward toward the endless expanse of shadow and stars moving endlessly above her, her eyes reflecting the swirls of light clusters of stars, her hooves hanging limp, wings flaring as the tears forming in her eyes began to spill faster.
Too high now for any clouds to actually reach, a height most ponies wouldn't dare fly to....
A height where a dead drop from the sky would be nearly impossible to recover from.
Over and over she wished the stars would wrap about her, the cosmic light would carry her away from life, from her troubles, from all her destroyed dreams and shredded fancies. She wanted nothing more than to give into a cool embrace of cold starlight and empty space, to forget everything.
Let me fade into all of that Shadow and Stardust...... Fade away from here, never to return, no pain, no suffering.... No guilt.
No regret
If she just let herself go now, just let herself fall back through the air they way she had come, she'd gain enough speed to keep going, to keep herself from recovering from the free fall, she would hit the ground- it'd be over in a moments time. No more living day to day with nothing left, no purpose, no dreams, no nightmares.....
Just fall
Her dreams had been shattered, her will to continue on worn away completely. Day to day, month to month... She'd been wandering in the shadow of regret, it forever following her wherever she went.
She'd been kicked out of the WonderBolts Academy not long after the fiasco involving Rainbow Dash... After she messed up royally, hurt somepony badly....
Without being able to achieve her lifelong dream of being a WonderBolt.... What was left?
She couldn't shake the guilt from her heart. She knew she had done wrong, she knew she was an awful pony who hurt others... She knew it. She'd known it since she'd been expelled and the haunting reminder of all the bad she'd ever done never left, all of it crowded her every waking thought, weighed her down and kept her from moving forward- there was nowhere to move forward to.
Her talent was flying, and fast. She had no skills in life outside of that- finding work was a nightmare.... She'd tried delivery service but all her letters ended up torn and lost when she flew, she'd tried manual work but that hadn't been any good either.
From Cloudsdale to Appaloosa, to Canterlot, Manehatten and all points in between.. Nothing.
Now her entire being was just one writhing mass of pain, despair, guilt, regret. She couldn't keep doing this- that feeling of not belonging in the world, the crushing wait of all her mistakes... It was just too much!
The tears started flowing faster as she curled in air, her wings flaring as she flipped her stomach toward the stars above her. She stretched a hoof forward, vision blurry and eyes stinging as she sniffed.
I wish I was a star.... No worries... Up there among all the rest.... Never alone....
Unless Luna took pity and turned her into one of those small, gleaming dots of light that forever painted the night sky- she couldn't be that. She couldn't simply fade into the dark folds of the night, to slowly fade into that shadow and stardust above her head.
Just Fall
It would be so easy, she didn't have to do anything- she just did all the work, all that was left was to let go, let herself fall past the point of recovery, all the way down toward the empty and isolated meadow far, far below her.
What's the point anymore, Lightning? You can't work, you don't have any pony left, nothing... No dreams, no hope for something better... No way to escape all the horrible things you did.
You deserve to just fade away. To disappear.
Nopony is going to miss you anyway...
So just fall
Tears sprung up into the cool air, rolling down her cheeks and taking flight above her as she curled back all the way, and let her wings stretch out behind her- her entire body suddenly falling back down the way she had come, her eyes never leaving the glittering cosmic expanse as it grew farther away.
This is it...
She let her eyes close as she started gaining speed, the air blowing her mane into her face.
This is the last time
She moved her head back at an angle so the wind could blow into it.
Just keep going.. Past the point of no return....
She gained speed and momentum every second, bursting back through the clouds, the ground approaching ever closer.
.:+:.
"Miss Lightning Dust, due to your abhorrent conduct and lack of regard for safety of your peers- as well as your unruly sense of sportsmanship, among all manner of other things, including the incident involving the hospitalization of Cadet Morning Shower- it is clear you are not fit to fly under this team, and not worthy of this badge." The burly Wonderbolts Training Officer growled as she reached a hoof forward and ripped the silver WonderBolts badge from her training suit without sign or remorse or emotion.
"You have been expelled from this Academy and will never fly as a WonderBolt. Pack your things and leave immediately, you're dismissed."
.:+:.
A tight knot formed in her chest, making it hard to breath and impossible from stopping the salty years in her eyes from spilling.
She'd never felt so lost, she could only stand right where she was, frozen to the spot as the reality crashed down on her head- she'd never be a Wonderbolt.
And what I did to Morning Shower.... There was so much blood... I.... I...
You're nearly there Lightning, just a little further, you won't have to suffer anymore.
She was nearly to that point of no return, once there- no amount of flapping or flying would stop her fall, she'd hit the ground, one split moment of pain and then nothing. She wouldn't feel anything anymore.
It sounded like utter bliss
Just a little farther....
She wouldn't have to face the rest of the world anymore. She wouldn't have to remember her mistakes, she wouldn't have to live with the pain of knowing she had.... Had killed somepony....
It was an accident!
... Accident or not I still did it.... Morning Shower didn't deserve that....
A few more seconds, this was it... She was going to do it this time.
She scrunched her eyes shut, willing herself to stay still, not to react, not to pay attention to the cold pit of fear that had settled in her stomach.
No, I can't pull up now.... I deserve to die.... Morning Shower deserves to be alive, I don't... I've made to many mistakes, I can't be helped....
Nopony can save me
.:+:.
"Dusty, look at me sweetheart."
Lightning Dust's eyes moved up toward the aging Pegasus stallion sitting in a chair before her, his teal coat dull, his short pale gold and red hair flecked with angry streaks of gray, his tired green eyes looking toward her as a small, faint smile graced his lips.
"Hmm? Daddy what's the matter?" She asked, immediately recognizing the sadness in his features, she climbed up onto the chair beside him, settling in front of him as his hooves wrapped about her gently, and he lightly bumped his nose against hers.
"I understand you really want to be a WonderBolt, yes?" He asked and her eyes gleamed.
"Yes! Just like you used to be!" She replied immediately, "I'm gonna be the best flier around! I'm already faster than everypony in town!"
"Yes you are." He agreed softly, "But you know, being fast and flying well isn't what being a WonderBolt is all about. There's more to it than that." He explained and she blinked,
"Like what?"
"There has to be teamwork, you have to be dedicated and trust the ponies you fly with, with your life. You have to be brave and strong, but you also need to be gentle and kind- its not about the fancy shows or the fans, first and foremost the WonderBolts are meant to protect other ponies, to protect Equestria." He explained, a sudden glint of memory passing through his eyes. "But most of all, the most important thing a WonderBolt needs to understand-" he drew his hoof under her chin and smiles softly. "Life is hard and dangerous. A true WonderBolt never gives up, and never let's anything bring them down- if they don't have the courage to stand up and protect what's important, the things most precious- then all is lost. And when things are lost- that doesn't mean they're gone for good- it just means one has to be willing to search for the good things again."
.:+:.
Lightning Dust's eyes snapped open as she flapped a wing and flipped about in air, wings flaring out to catch the wind and slow her down just before she hit the speed and height that would never allow her to recover.
Her muscles ached from the sudden strain of air pushing against her, as she angled down before pulling up to allow herself time to move horizontally at top speed not ten feet from the ground, she shook her head furiously to try and rid herself of the tears as anger rose inside of her.
She couldn't do it!
Every time she was about to hit the point of no return, that memory always invaded her mind- it was one of the last times she and her father had spoken at all, before he was admitted into the hospital and died a few months later.
Those words rung in her head and it was as if her body acted on its own, narrowly saving herself and adding on another night of pain and regret before she tried again the next day- and inevitably failed to go through with it again.
She angled up again, the tears flowing in anger now as she stomped down on top of a nearby cloud, shaking her head furiously and stomping about in fury with herself and fury toward the memory too.
"What is wrong with me?! I can't even manage to get this right let alone anything else!!" She scrunched her eyes closed and hung her head as she breathed in harsh, unhappy breaths, the fluffy white under her hooves being dotted with the glistening wet of her tears. "It isn't that hard!! All I have to do is just fall- and I still end up bailing out at the last minute!!"
A true WonderBolt never gives up, and never let's anything bring them down.
Too bad I'm never going to a be a WonderBolt Dad.... I'm just a screw up, I always was and that's never going to change.... I'm so sorry, I let you down.....
The tears started streaming faster and she let her hooves fall out from under her, sinking into the fluff of the cloud as she buried her face in her hooves and sobbed quietly- she hadn't cried this much since she was a filly, and every moment she grew colder as a sinking feeling of utter despair and isolation that had been growing for months hit an all time intensity- it hurt to breath. It hurt to live.
Daddy... I'm all alone... I.... I don't know what to do anymore..... I wish you were here.... I wish...... I wish I didn't.....
I don't want to feel like this anymore...!
She longed for the warm embrace of her father more than she could ever remember, not even after he had just died- she'd never missed him so much.... He'd been the only pony left in the world for her, and once he was gone she had been alone... Always alone and it hadn't changed.
But she didn't want to be alone anymore, no- but there wasn't a pony in the world she knew that she hadn't screwed up with, nopony liked her and they shouldn't- she'd been awful and mean for too long, reckless and unruly, nopony wanted her around anymore and she didn't blame them.
I miss you so much Daddy.... I need something to hold on to... Anything..... I.... Don't think I want to die.... I just... I don't want to hurt anymore...!
It was foolish to think her father could hear her now, but she still wished he could- and she wished he could answer her, help her.
He'd probably just smile like he always did, say something so calm and wise.... Never give up Dusty. You'll be OK. You're stronger than anypony I know!
If only it were actually true.
She sniffed, rubbing her face in her hooves as she glanced up toward the stars over her head, searching the glimmering lights for anything. Any sign, any trace of something out there listening to her pain.....
If there is somepony out there, if you're listening Dad.... I just.....
"....... I don't want to be alone anymore.... I want something to hold on to.... Somewhere I fit in... Another chance to make things right... That's all...." She whispered, her words falling on open air. ".... That can't be too much to ask, can it...?"
She sighed and let her ears drop, maybe it was too much to ask.
Her ears perked and her eyes widened as a flash of silver arced out across the starry night above her, falling away behind the horizon and leaving a misty trail of stardust behind it.
"If that's all you're looking for, I think I can help you."
"... Yes... I'll.... Give it a try at least..." Lightning Dust murmured, her eyes breaking away from the stars above to match gazes with the ebony mare before her.
NightFire- Captain of the newly revived nighttime Aerial Team the ShadowBolts.
The same pony, by some odd coincidence- appeared to offer Lightning Dust a chance to join her team... To give her a second chance when all seemed wrong and spiraling out of control.
Just as Lightning Dust asked for another chance on a fanciful whim...
NightFire seemed to beam a little at the answer, despite the hesitation and uncertainty in Lightning Dust's voice.
"Perfect!" She exclaimed, giving Lightning Dust a small pat on the shoulder with one of her wings, a friendly gesture. "Trust me, I think you'll really enjoy being on the team- everypony on it is very friendly and easy going, you should have no trouble fitting in."
Lightning Dust paused, ears pressing against her head. "NightFire?" She asked quietly and the mare blinked,
"Yes?"
"... Will everypony else on the Team.... Know about... You know..?" She asked slowly, her thoughts flashing to the ponies hurt, the awful things said.... Morning Shower...
NightFire gave her a sympathetic smile, "Nopony will blame you for or treat you differently for anything that's happened in the past, I promise you." When Lightning Dust didn't look reassured she shook her head, "No, only my 2nd in Command and I will know of your past- unless you decide to share with any pony else on the team that is. Don't worry about that." Lightning Dust let out a short sigh of relief and NightFire smiled again.
"Would you take a fly with me?"
.:+:.
"Meet me in Canterlot when you're ready to join up- once everything's been settled and your ready of course. I'm usually running about the Castle during the day, when I'm not sleeping of course. If you can't find me when you get there, any Gaurd should be able to help you- all you need to do is ask. From there, I'll take you to our... headquarters I guess you could call it. There's plenty of rooms if you need a place to stay, and being a member of the team the board is free. Once we meet up we'll get on to your Initiation, meeting the other Members of the Team, and grand tour- anything and everything you need to know."
Maybe I'm moving into this a little fast.... I mean, its only been three days since then....
Lightning Dust let out a sigh in her flight through the crisp morning air, the sun rising above the horizon behind her as she steadily made her way toward the distant, but ever approaching figure of Canterlot. The city tucked away in the nook of great large cliff, built up layers and the palace itself situated against the cliff, overhanging the free air where numerous quarries and waterfalls tipped over the edge and down into a smaller, but no less crowded situation of buildings at the base of the cliff itself.
NightFire had brought her on a small flight after she had agreed to give the whole 'New Member of the ShadowBolts' thing a try. She'd explained what she could- more on the.... She guessed it was 'rocky relationship' the ShadowBolts had with the WonderBolts, though NightFire said she was working on that.
As it happened, she explained that SpitFire was the one who agreed to give the ShadowBolts a chance, and she was slowly working her team around.
But it was the idea that SpitFire that had given NightFire a call- and suggested recruiting Lightning at all was what surprised her most.
She and SpitFire had not ended on the best note, and it was hard to think the WonderBolts Captain would be.... Well, concerned with her after having ordered she be dismissed from the Academy. Why would any pony even want to help somepony who had done so much harm, so much bad?
SpitFire held no love for Lightning Dust, of that she was sure- so why even call NightFire at all? It didn't make any sense to her.
She couldn't say she was ever very close to the WonderBolts Captain as it was.... She hardly knew her, but she couldn't believe after everything she had done and everything that had happened, that under any circumstance SpitFire may have a small inkling of like and concern for her.
So the question again, why had she called NightFire?
Lightning Dust shook her head to clear it of the thoughts and instead turned her focus on flying- her slow, almost leisurely flying- slower than she was used to but a nice change. She was in no hurry anyway, most pnies wouldn't be up at this hour- and she still had a good hour to go before she even reached the city at all.
The last time she'd been here she'd tried working for a delivery service in the lower part of the city. It'd been for the local mail service, run by a pony named Swift Tidings.
It had worked, at first. All her deliveries were made on time- mostly.
Fast flying and fragile paper didn't work well together, flying too fast made the letters tear and break- some of them flew out of her bag and got lost... And then she had a hard time avoiding the other flying Pegasi over the city when she was speeding through the air.
For all her training and all her agility it just happened that she would eventually run into some pony else- which had ended in a lot of lost and destroyed mail, and a prompt sacking.
She sighed at the thought and shook her head a little, for wherever reason, whenever she tried to do good she always ended up screwing things up royally...... It somewhat worried her, thinking what might happen being on the ShadowBolts at all.
Her worst fear was the idea she might get somepony hurt.... That would be awful, and she wasnt sure she could handle that. Not after Morning Shower.
A shiver ran through her body at the thought and she had to fight to keep the memory from crashing down on her head.
Either way, she knew her way around the city itself... The Castle? Well not so much, that was a different story.
It made her a little nervous as to how she was going to manage to find NightFire in the mass of the Canterlot Castle..... She'd end up asking for directions, which made her a little more nervous too.
She shook her head at herself and let her mind fall away into silence.... At least, sort of.
.:+:.
This place is.... Holy cow
Lightning Dust looked up at the castle reaching up above her head for what looked like endlessly- flights upon flights of stairs and levels for all manner rooms and what not that just litter the inside of the Castle.
There had to be at least a hundred separate hallways in this Building, and who the hell knows how many other rooms and the like. The heavy wood door before her was shut only halfway and probably lead to a large foyer that was meant to house large groups of ponies that would come for all manner royal and noble events.
The cobblestone pathway leading p to the doors suddenly swam with the shadows and forms of countless regally dressed ponies moving in a wave toward the door- lanterns and decorations hung up on posts overhead as the whispers of music played about her- this was what she imagined the Grand Galloping Gala to be. An event filled to the brim with beautifully dressed mares, smartly dressed stallions- and array of small talk and laughter, drinks being passed about, small snacks, music being played by the best musicians in Equestria.... A chance to meet the Royalty of Equestria, to experience life in the highest tier of society for one night. To interact, to meet celebrities, to have fun.....
Her eyes scanned over the stout and large figure of the single solitary guard pony standing outside the gate with a neutral face. She shuffled her hooves a bit, wondering if she should take her chances moving about the Castle, or simply ask if he had any clue where NightFire was....
Can I even just roam about the Castle on my own anyway?
She fluffed her wings up a little and trotted forward quickly, approaching the buck who blinked at her approach with his pale yellow eyes, she stopped before his with a nervous clear of her throat, her bead tilting slightly to see him- he was taller than her. This Guard was a Pegasus like herself, heavily built, strong, broad- with a dark gray coat and hints of a red and gray mane poking out from under his helmet.
"U-um... Excuse me..?" She mumbled,
"How may I help you?" He asked politely,
"... I uh... I'm looking for NightFire..?" She mumbled, earning a blink from him. "Would you happen to know... Where she is..?"
"Another Recruit?" He asked, earning a blink of slight surprise from her. The guard have her a small smile, "Miss NightFire usually only ever gets visitors when she's expecting another Recruit." He explained, "Otherwise she's only ever busy patrolling the Castle and talking with Princess Luna. She doesn't get visitors often." He smiled a bit more and she took on a small breath, "She should be in the Canterlot Garden- it's through this door, all the way straight through, past the staircase and is the last set of doors on your left- you'll know you're there when you hit the Ball Room and the Windowed Doors at the very end." He nodded his head toward the door with a friendly, polite smile.
"If you need any help- anypony in the Castle should be more than willing to give you a hoof." He nodded a bit, almost apologetically. "I can't leave my post, otherwise I'd lead you there myself."
Lightning Dust smiled a bit and nodded, a little relieved for such the kind conversation. She'd have hated it if she'd received a curt reply and unhappy look from the guard if he felt she was bothering him.
I suppose it gets boring just standing here all day....
"Thank you." She replied, nodding to him as she steppes toward the door.
"My pleasure."
She left him behind with a small wave of her wing as she headed inside.
She had been right about the grand foyer- the roof rose up above her head high enough to fly with ease. There was a magnificent staircase leading up to higher levels and two corridors stretching off to both sides. The floor underhoof was polished marble of an ivory hue, tapestries bearing the marks of the Princesses hung about the walls- sunlight filtered in the large, far stretching windows about and let its rays bounce off of everything softly.
There was a third corridor stretching out to the left of the staircase that lead back, farther into the ground level of the Castle. Her hooves made a slight tap as she crossed the foyer quickly- the Castle seemed silent and there wasn't another pony in sight as of yet.... Her nose twitched when she caught the scent of something wafting on the air from the direction of the left hallway.
Smells like the kitchen.... Her stomach grumbled and she was reminded of her lack of any actual food for a good few days.....
She couldn't stomach food in most days, the guilt and pain writhing about inside of her didn't allow much in the way of eating. Whenever she managed to choke anything down it was always a small portion and hardly enough to satisfy.
Though at the moment, all she felt was hunger and the ache of nervousness biting at her heels.
She was a bit worried on what was going to happen, now that she was finally jumping into something again- putting herself out there she guessed. She hadn't been one to take chances since everything had gone down hill, she was afraid she would mess things up like she seemed to with everything else.... She didn't want to mess up. She was afraid she would.
What if I get somepony hurt... Again?
That was keeping her back a bit- but she was pushing past it as best she could. Even with all the doubt and the pain of the past hanging over her head- she was moving forward, because she was a little..... Excited.
This seemed like a good thing, it somehow felt like a good thing- deep, deep down inside of her. She was looking forward to what would come of trying the ShadowBolts out. She'd be around other ponies, ponies she could talk to- she wouldn't be alone, and they wouldn't know about the awful things she'd done in the past.
She really wanted it to be a good thing, in all honesty... But did she deserve it?
I don't want to be alone anymore.... I want to be a part of something again.... But what if I mess it all up? Like I always do?
Her steps slowed a little as she entered a great, large round room with windows on all sides, the floor polished, a stage near the edge, tables on the rims and sunlight brighter through the windows here than anywhere else.
Her head hung slightly as doubt began building up again, signing her down and making her hesitate. What if she screwed up and got somepony hurt? What if she wasn't good enough to be on the team? What if the other members hated her, like every pony else?
I try to be nice, I try to be friendly and still everypony else just doesn't like me...
Her walk across the Ball Room and toward the double windowed doors ceased.
Dad.... I'm so screwed up..... I can't even believe anypony would like me... Let alone tolerate me anymore....
That was part of it, she had been so used to ponies hating her for so long she wasn't able to think any pony might like her at all. She had been in so many bad situations and the like, and come out hurting so many times... She doubted she could do anything right.
In the back of her mind she knew it- she knew it was doubt and fear that had been holding her back. Doubt and fear had been strengthening the pain she felt for so long, making it so bad...
.... I just wanted it to end.... I wanted.....
Her eyes widened slightly, she had wanted.
Was it possible... That in her own mind... She was actually... Moving past it, even just a little? That she had wanted to make it end, that she had wanted to let go.... But now she didn't.
There was something else now, a small, flickering emotion that had made its way into her heart- something tiny, fighting to get bigger, something she hasn't had in way to long... And it shocked her to realize it now.
I.... I have.... Hope..?
With the offer to join the Team, in coming to Canterlot, agreeing to give it a try- she had ignited some small inkling of hope inside of herself without knowing. Her excitement for what was coming was fueled by the small hope that all of it would turn out alright- that somehow, she'd do better this time around.
Of course, she'd have to try- try to be better, try to keep from making the same mistakes she had made. There was no guarantee she would.... But the fact that she was even slightly hopeful calmed the sea of pain and despair tumbling about inside her just a little.
A tiny flare of hope wouldn't be enough to rid her of the haunting shadow of her past and her guilt..... But it felt a little good, she couldn't deny that.
And NightFire... She was so kind when she came to see me... Understanding and gentle almost... She's nothing like all those other ponies I knew- and she knows about my past, and doesn't seem bothered by it...
She smiled slightly at the thought, thinking that maybe.... Maybe she liked NightFire already. The mare's kind personality and forgiving demeanor was a fresh breath of air- one she intended to breathe in deeply. She lift her head up and squared her feet a little,
She had to work to make this alright. She had already been handed the chance, and now it was up to her to make it last. She didn't want to be alone again. She wanted to fit in somewhere. She'd do her best to get rid of her doubt and try to let that small glimmer of hope grow more- as much as it could.
I have to do this.... For me.... For you too, Dad. I want to make it up to you... To everypony.
"Are you lost, my little pony?"
Her entire body tensed at the sudden voice behind her, and she whipped around to come face to face with a tall, elegant white alicorn- her multi-color mane and tail flowing as her pink eyes looked down at her- a coffee cup held in her magical grasp.
Lightning Dust's jaw dropped a little as she took in who was standing before her- her body struggling to react as she hastily bowed on one knee and lowered her head.
"P-Princess Celestia..! I-I'm sorry, I didn't mean to bother you!" She apologized quickly, stammering though she tried her best not to.
"It's alright, my little pony- no need for that so early in the morning." Princess Celestia murmured, extending a hoof to gently pull Lightning Dust back up on to her hooves, she looked up at the mare to see she was smiling a little. "It's odd to have visitors so early, may I ask why you're here?" The Princess murmured, before her eyes widened a little and a knowing look passed across her face. "Ah, your name is Lightning Dust, correct?"
Holy freaking cow... Princess Celestia knows my name?!
"U-uhmmm.... Yes... I... I'm Lightning Dust...." She stammered most ungraciously- get it together Lightning!
"Ah, I've heard of you from SpitFire." She smiled slightly. Lightning Dust deflated nearly instantly.
That means the Princess has only ever heard bad things about me....
"O-oh...." She mumbled, head lowering a little and ears falling.
"Don't look so glum, my little pony." The Princess murmured softly. "You made mistakes- every pony does in their life time. You just have to be willing to work to make up for the things in the past." Lightning glanced up, eyes widening a little, the Princess smiled gently at her. Was it possible.... The Princess could read minds?
But even then, how could any pony who knew of her mistakes.... Be so kind? From the Princess to NightFire?
It was so foreign... And she didn't know what to do with it.
"As long as you try, it shouldn't matter what happened before. SpitFire may have said things about you and discourages the things that happened, but she said she also saw promise in you and you're talent. She was disappointed she wasn't able to help you hone your skills." The Princess told her softly, she blinked in shock.
Is it...... Possible.....
SpitFire... Didn't hate me... Entirely...?
"And now you will be joining NightFire's team.... You will try, won't you?" Princess Celestia smiled, a little hopefully. Lightning Dust slowly nodded, standing up a little straighter.
"Y-yes. I will try. I wanna make up for everything I did." She answered, her voice trembling slightly though much firmer than she expected. She dipped her head a little, "I am sorry for everything I did and everything that happened... It was never my intention to get any pony hurt and I wish I could take it back...."
"There is no need to apologize to me, my little pony." The Princess told her softly. "I myself have made many mistakes in my lifetime- we all do it." She murmured, bending down to brush her head against Lightning Dust's neck softly- she froze at the sudden contact, her heart racing. She felt her face heat up,
"And I hope you can some day forgive yourself." The Princess murmured gently, raising her head again and slowly turning. She levitated her coffee cup toward her and took a sip, smiling just a little. Lightning Dust could only stare, her body was frozen.
"NightFire should be just back from patrol- you'll probably find her by the pond." The Princess murmured softly in a neutral tone as she began to walk away. "Good luck and happy flying, Lightning Dust."
She didn't move for a very long time, long after the form of the Princess had disappeared back the way she had come and she was left alone in the room. Her mind was racing frantically to try and piece together what had occurred... What the Princess meant, how odd it was she was so... Friendly and
Did that..... Just happen...?
.:+:.
Lightning Dust made her way under the low hanging branches of a row of soft, almost feathery trees that arched over her head- blotting out the sun as it continued to rise and the morning set in. The Canterlot Garden was silent apart from the few and far chirp of a bird from somewhere far off, the slight whistle of a breeze in the leaves overhead- the rustle of closed flower pods clinging to the branches above her.
The grass under hoof was lightly tread and soft, a bright, fresh green that clung with the last traces of morning dew.
Ahead, at the end of the grove- she caught the faint glittering of sunlight off of water- assuming it was the pond the Princess had mentioned.
She would push the incident with the Royal Figure to the back of her mind for now- she hadn't any clue how to handle such an unwarranted and unexpected encounter... Her mind was still racing.
I need to find NightFiflre, I have to focus or I might miss her...
Her ears twitched to the sound of something rustling overhead- her head snapped up toward the limbs arching over her and she blinked, not seeing anything but swearing she had heard some sort of noise....
THUMP!!!!
She jumped backward, her wings flaring up as a dark mass suddenly hit the ground in front of her, tall and looming, huge wings spread out to cast a shadow over her firm, a wave of sudden wind hitting her face and ruffling her hair back.
This being the second time something unexpected had happened that morning, she had to wonder if she should even be there at all.
Her first thoughts with the sudden encounter, and from the brief looming glimpse she got of it, she assumed it was some sort of creature and struggled to find her feet. She saw it move and scrunched her eyes closed, stumbling back on to her haunches.
I don't wanna get eaten!
"Pffftttt.... Haha!!"
Her eyes snapped open, staring at the ground in response to the sudden laughing. Laughing.
The shadow cast by the creatures wings suddenly shifted and she looked up, blinking rapidly as she made out what it was that was standing before her- a pegasus stallion.
His coat was a brown hue with a darker brown mane streaked with dull crimson, blown back by years of fast flying she guessed, and lavender eyes that glinted in amusement as he smiled at her. His front left hoof had a darker brown marking and her eyes landed in the band-aid stuck to his cheek, the skin underneath bruised slightly.
He was a bit taller than her and a bit more bulky, she could see the power in the muscle of his shoulders and wings- she blinked as her head tilted slightly, noticing the smirk across his lips.
".... Wha....?" She mumbled, trying to catch up to the present and snapping herself away from giving him a good look over.
"Sorry to give you a scare." The stallion chuckled, "I had no idea you were so jumpy, Lightning Dust." Her eyes widened a little.
"You... Know me...?" She asked and he nodded.
"Sorry, should have introduced myself first I suppose." He chuckled, extending a wing toward her. She paused, recognizing the gesture and slowly extended her own wing, their top most feathers curling about the other as they shook once or twice in greeting. "Name's Fast Tracks Aerofly- most ponies call me Aero though, I'm NightFire's second in command, nice to finally meet you."
Lightning Dust's ears perked at the news, eyes widening slightly.
So this was one of the ShadowBolts apart from NightFire.... And the second in command at that.
She found it a little odd, because for whatever reason she couldn't picture this stallion as in command of anything. He seemed to have s childish air about him that screamed.... Inexperience. Maybe she was jumping the gun a little bit, she didn't know anything about him- but he did seem childish, and she couldn't shake the feeling off.
"Nice to meet you too..." She said slowly, banishing such thoughts to the back of her mind. Not for the first time that day, she felt a little nervous with such civil conversation with another pony. She still wasn't used to it, and she doubted she ever would be again.
Their wings moved apart as they folded them back to their sides, "... I was coming to meet up with NightFire..." She explained slowly, Fast Tracks- Aero, smirked.
"Figures." He chuckled and she blinked, he glanced away over his shoulder, suddenly looking slightly deflated. "... Of course she won the bet...."
".. Bet...?" Lightning Dust mumbled under her breath, he didn't seem to hear her say anything at all- instead he turned toward her with a bright smile.
"Night's just this way," he said, hopping slightly to clear the distance between them, to stand just next to her- he nudged her with a wing on the shoulder, sending her a little off balance at the unwarranted (and a little rough) contact.
Again. Childish.
"Wanna race me to the pond?" He smirked and she stared, seeing an excited gleam make its way into his lavender gaze.
Very childish...
But it made her smile a little, his antics. He was much less of an authority figure than somepony's playful older brother.
"Uh... No, that's OK." She replied, "I wouldn't know where I was going anyway..." Aero looked a little disappointed, but smiled anyway.
"Alright." He agreed, pulling her forward by draping a wing over her back and beginning to walk. She stumbled sightly but fell into step with him, tensing a little at the contact, feeling her face heat up slightly.
"You're gonna have to race me sometime though." He said, "Gotta prove I'm still the best racer on the team." He smirked and she blinked.
She had faintly noticed it when he hopped over to her shoulder- it was a small fleeting look, at his Cutie Mark.
She was fairly certain there was a checkered flag involved.
"Not that I'm saying you aren't fast." He went on, "It's just racing isn't all about speed. Its about skill and planning, technique." She swore his chest swelled in self-pride a minute. "You may be super fast, but without the agility and the control needed to round tight corners and maneuver between opponents, you won't be winning any races."
"... You really like racing, don't you?" She asked, smiling slightly at how happy he seemed to be talking about racing.
"Love it." He smirked, turning toward her with a small wink. "You're looking at the best Flight-Derby Racer this side of Equestria." He told her, his tone confident if not a little cocky.
They came out from under the overhanging trees to a grassy clearing bordering a glittering pond dotted with water-lilies and all manner of aquatic plants. On one end there was a small bridge leading over the inlet of a stream on the opposite end from where they were, with trees and small inklings of a hedge farther off.
Lightning Dust glanced up at him in slight wonder, trying to imagine this hefty stallion zooming between opponents and winning Flight-Derbys on a regular basis.
She had heard of the sport of course, it was popular in CloudsDale and a few other cities. It consisted of a round track and several contestants, all trying to beat each other to the finish line first. Sometimes it was only a single lap, other times it was several- and in some cases there were obstacles set up for racers to weave through. She had heard that on occasion the WonderBolts themselves would enter such races- at their own special events of course. But Lightning Dust had never been in one, and hadn't hardly any interest.
"Really?" She asked and he smirked, looking delighted at her curious expression.
"You bet!" He grinned, wings fluffing up a little.
"Don't forget to mention all of your races were MoonLight Derby's."
Lightning Dust perked at the sudden, easily recognizable voice- while Aero visibly stiffened, standing like a wooden plank, his grin fading to a nervous expression somewhere between a grimace and a forced smile.
Lightning Dust leaned, peering around Aero to see the familiar ebony coat of NightFire shinning in the early morning sun. The mare was walking toward the two of them slowly, bits of grass clinging to her coat as if she had been laying in the grass, about her neck a pair of purple rimmed flight goggles hung loosely- matching the pair that Aero had around his own neck.
"N-Night...." Aero stammered slightly, slowing glancing backward toward the mare.
"Wait..." Lightning Dust murmured, suddenly realizing what NightFire said. "Moonlight Derby's? The illegal midnight races?!" Her eyes snapped back to Fast Tracks, who deflated almost entirely.
"Couldn't let me impress the new recruit, could you NightFire?" He muttered, as said mare stopped beside him, small smile hiding an unamused glare that was clearly intended for the stallion.
"Can't let you mislead her." NightFire replied easily, earning a small huff but she ignored it, turning a genuine smile on Lightning Dust, who suddenly felt like she walked in on an argument between two ponies for some reason. "Its good to see you again, Lightning Dust. I had hoped you would meet me here soon, I look forward to taking you to HQ-" NightFire began in that sweet voice Lightning Dust was becoming so used to,
"- for Initiation!" Aero suddenly spoke up, seemingly shaking off his earlier deflated mood. He simultaneously cheered up, and completely cut NightFire off- leaving the mare in mid sentence and shooting him a rather heated glare with those icy silver eyes she had. He didn't seem to notice though and just beamed at Lightning in a childish manner, "It'll be super cool, I always love the Initiation Ritual, the looks on all the newbies faces is just priceless!"
WACK!
NightFire brought her wing up and smacked it across the back of Aero's head, being tall enough she didn't have to reach very much. Aero looked stunned, before sending a small, apologetic smile toward her and the unhappy look she set on him.
Lightning Dust was suddenly convinced NightFire wasn't the sort of pony that anypony should piss off.
"Once again, you and your habit for interrupting me." She muttered lowly, he smiled nervously.
"Sorry Night..." The mare let out a sigh and glanced back to the still watching Lightning, who blinked once NightFire's eyes landed on her again. Her annoyed scowl suddenly turned to a warm, gentle smile- her mood flipping in an instant, again.
"As Aero was saying- yes, once we get to HQ you will be formally inducted into the Team, from there you'll get a tour of our place and introduced to everypony there." NightFire explained, "Don't let him scare you- the Initiation Ritual is nothing to be nervous about."
NightFire's eyes snapped toward the stallion, suddenly come and flinty- Lightning sweatdropped a little.
"Its the unwanted pranks the other members pull that you should be worried over." NightFire growled, "I'll try to keep them at bay- but eventually you will have a bit of fun poked at you from somepony or other- I apologize in advance, its just how things tend to go on the Team."
Lightning nodded slightly, unsure what to do about the mare's fast flipping attitudes.
"A-alright..." She stammered,
Aero seemed much less fazed by the angry look than Lightning Dust did. He simply smiled in the most innocent way he could manage, and NightFire huffed a little.
Was there some sort of... Feud between these two..?
Aren't they supposed to be the leaders of the team though..?!
She wondered if their partnered leadership was very effective at all... Or if they managed to work with one another very well.
Surely they must....
"Everypony's excited to meet you, Lightning Dust. I'm sure you'll settle in quickly." NightFire smiled, snapping her from her thoughts. "If you're ready? Would you like to head out?" She asked,
Was she ready? Good question.... And one she wasn't sure of...
.... Yet.
She paused a minute, knowing she had already taken the steps- she had already started this train and told herself she had to try. She had to give it a shot and she couldn't back out now- she had to go, she just wasn't sure she was ready yet.
It hardly mattered, she guessed... She would just get used to it, do it until she was ready. She'd get to being ready eventually- she didn't know how long it would take, but she... She hoped she would be ready, some day.
She just wasn't going to halt herself in her plans and her actions until that day, not now.
She nodded, a little hesitantly- but more sure than she expected herself to be.
I have to change.
I have to be better.
"I'm ready to go- lead the way." She said, earning a smile from NightFire and a small smirk from the stallion beside her.
NightFire dipped her head a little and turned-
"Very well, follow me."
Lightning Dust started forward, a small hitch of hesitation in her first step before it disappeared all together.
Aero nudged her with a wing, he waited for her to step up next to him before following NightFire himself. She glanced up to him and the warm smile he gave her,
"Determination is a good thing." He said, "Being determined to move forward- that'll help you more than you know."
The three pegasi took off into the early morning air without a word- Lightning Dust followed closely the ebony wings of NightFire- and the long wingspan of Fast Tracks- the Leaders of the ShadowBolts.
She followed them toward what was to be- the place where she belonged.
... A ShadowBolt...
.:+:.
Author's Note
Alright, here's to the new chapter- last bit of exposition before things roll. :D
Feedback are very appreciated! Thank you!
