Everything I've Ever Wanted

by Sporktacles

Letters

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Twilight Sparkle was a busy pony princess.

She stared down at a desk covered in paperwork. Two days of diligent effort had whittled the once-towering stacks of papers into the much less intimidating pile that now remained in her “IN” tray. Still, despite her meticulousness, these last few papers refused to be moved to her now overflowing “OUT” tray by sheer headache-inducing tenacity.

She sighed and looked over a request for her signature on a petition already covered with the names of a large number of nobles. It demanded the abolition of the high taxes on personal magically powered devices, citing the fact this placed a disproportionate tax burden solely on unicorns. While this was obviously true, since only unicorns could power them, Twilight was well aware that an overwhelming majority of said magical devices were unnecessary luxury items affordable only by the very rich. She was fairly sure that Princess Celestia had implemented that tax specifically to shift the tax burden away from poorer ponies.

On the other hand, there were persistent rumors in noble society that Twilight had “gone native” in Ponyville after leaving Canterlot and had turned into some sort of secret anti-unicorn “tribe-traitor” - mostly because since her rise to princesshood Twilight had campaigned very hard for the socially disadvantaged. Despite the fact that the inhabitants of the small towns who benefited most from those policies came from all three tribes, the nobles often perceived them as consisting mostly of earth ponies and pegasi. No doubt those rumor-mongers would have a field day if she declined to add her signature to the petition. Their disdainful glares and almost-rude comments during official events were starting to become unbearable.

Ugh. I can’t believe I skipped lunch to deal with nonsense like this.

She had put off dealing with this petition for long enough. It looked like her high-society reputation would just have to take another blow - the money from that tax was unquestionably more important. It didn’t exactly help that Flim and Flam had used one example of such a device to nearly drive Applejack’s family off Sweet Apple Acres.

Maybe I should ask Princess Celestia to raise that tax instead, grinned Twilight inwardly.

Her eyes ran over the work she had yet to complete, but stopped over a richly bound tome with Princess Celestia’s cutie mark embroidered into the cover.

It’s been two days and Sunset Shimmer still hasn’t contacted me. I wonder how she’s doing.

Twilight opened the journal and hoofed through the pages. The majority of the messages were of course regarding studies on magic, making her marvel at how talented Sunset had been even at a young age - easily rivalling Twilight’s own foalhood mastery of the subject and in some areas even surpassing it.

One thing about the messages that struck her as odd was the informal, overly-personal manner in which Sunset wrote. Twilight’s letters to Princess Celestia had always carried the tone of a student to a mentor and friend. While her mentor had adopted the same approach when writing to Sunset Shimmer, the filly’s entries more closely resembled correspondence between pen-pals, including intimate details such as her feelings, thoughts, and dreams. Sunset’s foalhood had been apparently been filled with a great deal of happiness and curiosity.

At the same time there were also discussions over a far more expansive range of topics than what Twilight had experienced under Princess Celestia. Sunset Shimmer’s education had covered statecraft, foreign culture, etiquette, psychology, public speaking, and even advanced interpersonal skills.

Wow, she could probably do better at all this political stuff than me. No wonder she had the whole of Canterlot High wrapped around her finger. I wonder why I didn't get all this training?

The obvious answer came to Twilight almost immediately. The stark truth saddened her a little.

Princess Celestia probably didn’t want things to turn out with me the way they did with Sunset.

As the entries went on they became more and more infrequent, and Sunset Shimmer gradually became more angry and demanding with her teacher. Then finally a large gap in time between Sunset’s last entry and…

…pages and pages of Princess Celestia’s distinctive flowing hornwriting, entreating Sunset to return home. The first one must have been written almost immediately after Sunset Shimmer arrived in the human world.

Dear Sunset Shimmer,

I want you to know that I have already forgiven you. Please do not be afraid to come back to the castle. No matter what happens, I will always consider you my special student.

The portal closes in two days. I hope that you will reconsider and return home before then.

Your Mentor,

Princess Celestia

Twilight skimmed through the later letters. At first they retained the tone of earlier entries, offering forgiveness and reinstatement as her student, but as time passed the messages turned more and more towards self-recrimination and apologies and later still, to frightened and desperate pleading.

I’m not sure I should be reading this. Some of this looks embarrassingly personal for Princess Celestia.

Twilight skipped most of the remaining pages, but at the end she could not help but read the last entry.

My dearest Sunset Shimmer,

I don’t know if you have ever forgiven or will ever forgive me, but I want to tell you again that I am so, so sorry. Not a day goes by that I don’t think of how I could have done things differently.

I wish I had paid more attention when I could still have been there for you. I wish I could have seen how wrong I was back before I could turn down the path that split us. I wish there was some way I could take back everything I said and did that day I drove you away.

I worry about you all the time. I want to believe that the little filly I once held is now all grown up and happy despite all my mistakes. But it’s been so many years and I don’t even know if you’re still alive. If you read this, please, PLEASE at least write SOMETHING so I know you’re okay.

Every day I lower the sun I think of the Sunset that I failed.

I love you and will always love you,

Celestia

It was dated three years prior. Sunset Shimmer had never replied.

***

Twilight closed the journal. The pain in those words was quite evident, but she had known for a while how much Princess Celestia wanted to see her errant student. When Twilight had returned through the mirror after the Fall Formal with her crown, the very first thing Princess Celestia did was to ask her was how Sunset Shimmer fared. It seemed a little strange at the time considering how important her crown had been, but Twilight recalled the relief on her former mentor’s face when told that Sunset was well and with new friends. After the Battle of the Bands and the reopening of the portal, Twilight was asked to persuade Sunset Shimmer to at least visit. But when that offer had been politely declined, Princess Celestia had opted not to pursue it further.

It felt odd that Sunset never wanted to close that final rift between herself and her former teacher, but Twilight had not probed deeper because she saw it as a private matter she had no business going into.

Twilight opened the journal to a new page. She picked up a quill and was about to start with “Dear Sunset Shimmer…”, but stopped. Writing a full letter seemed silly when there was only one thing she wanted to ask.

How are you doing, Sunset?

Sunset Shimmer’s answer came surprisingly quickly.

I’m feeling a lot better, but I’m still not ready to talk about it. Thanks for caring, though.

Somehow that reply did not relieve Twilight of her concern. She looked at the pile of work she still had to complete. She felt that she really ought to finish it, but she needed a break and reading the journal had filled her with an inexplicable desire to talk to her friend as soon as possible.

Twilight would have to tell Spike not to cook for her. At the time, it seemed that the excursion would be little more than just a quick meal and chat with her friend before coming back home to sleep early. After all, the next day was Hearth's Warming Eve. She would be busy.

Do you want to hang out anyway? We could grab a bite to eat.

There was a much longer pause this time before the reply came.

I’m about to make dinner. But if you like, you can come to my room at the CHS boarding house and I can make extra.

It dawned on Twilight that she had never visited Sunset Shimmer where she lived. It felt like an ideal opportunity to experience a side of Sunset’s life that she didn’t show often.

Sure. I’ll head on over now.

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